Oregairu Volume 13
by Pan-chan The Panda
Summary: Hachiman Hikigaya have suffered the full consequence of forgetting his belief in reality when he gives into his feelings and desire for something genuine. Now he has discarded those unnecessary feelings and once again return as a youth hating, monster of logic who could see through the lies of the world. But did he truly remove those feelings?
1. Monologue

**And so it begins. This monologue is a bit similar with the prologue in the first volume. please leave a review everyone :D**

* * *

 **Monologue**

* * *

Youth is a lie. It is nothing but evil.

In the end I suffered the full consequence for even trying to understand it.

Those of you who rejoice in youth are perpetually deceiving yourselves and those around you. You perceive everything about the reality surrounding you in a positive light..

As I tried to go for a positive light in my life once, reality hits me back even harder yet it made me realized something.

I'll give you an example. If you are in 'love' you would just forget about everything and keep telling yourself that everything is going to be fine, but you are sadly mistaken to think we live in a world of fairy tales.

We live in reality therefore everything won't go exactly as we think it would.

We lived in a world full of lies, secrets, crimes and failure.

My desire for something made me forget what reality was. Therefore remembering the principles of reality is necessary whereas desires are just another wonders of youth that is inferior in life.

If you think feelings and desires would make your life even better then it amounts to nothing. This is simply opportunism. Therefore, it is a sham, full of damnable lies, deception, secrets and fraud.

They are evil.

But recently, I've seen real evil.

That is to say, ironic as it is, those who do not glorify their youth are the truly righteous ones.

In conclusion:

Youth,

Just go blow yourselves up already.

* * *

 **Next chapter 1: Hachiman Hikigaya continues to see the lies of the world.**


	2. Hachiman Hikigaya continues

**Here we go, the start of volume 13. Sorry for any error in advance and please leave a review!**

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Hachiman Hikigaya continues to see the lies of the world.**

* * *

It's the season of spring now in the month of April. It's already been more than a month since the graduation of third years.

A lot of things happened during the last day of that school term. An event I can't ever forget, but at the same time that event made realize reality and remind who I am. So I discarded all the unnecessary feelings inside me and just moved on.

Moving on doesn't mean you forget what's happened. It just means you have to accept what happened and continue living.

"Hiratsuka! " A teacher burst his voice loudly in front of Hiratsuka-sensei in the teacher's lounge, and I was standing next to him being scolded yet again.

"What did you do this time, Hikigaya?" Hiratsuka-sensei asked as she puffed her cigarette.

"All I did was completed an essay that was given to me by this sensei as a home work that's all." I said nonchalantly with both my hands placed in the pocket of my trouser.

"You completed it alright. But it was out of topic! I told you to write an essay about the modern life of Japanese but instead you wrote something about what, youth!?" the teacher continued scolding me; his voice was unusually loud for a man at his age.

He took out a certain paper from his file, and it was my essay. He starts re-reading it again out loud.

"And _go blow yourselves up already_? This whole essay of yours is twisted!"

"It's not twisted, sir. I'm merely stating the truth about how reality works. That's all." I finished making my statement while the teacher continued glaring at my direction.

"Hiratsuka, fix this student of yours!" he shifted his gaze and his rambling back to Hiratsuka-sensei.

She let out a deep breath and crushed her cigarette on her ashtray before speaking.

"He's not my student anymore, he's yours. Why not try getting to know your student a bit." It's true; the man who's scolding me right now is my new sensei of modern Japanese.

"Plus, he's a lot more interesting once you get to know him." Hiratsuka-sensei made a grin as she spoke.

"I'm not here to make friends Hiratsuka! He was your student, you know him better than I do so handle him." He handed my essay to Hiratsuka-sensei, as she begins to look through it.

"Now if you'll excuse, I have another class to attend to." The teacher informs his leave and walked away from me and Hiratsuka-sensei.

Once he exits the teacher's lounge to attend to his scheduled class, Hiratsuka-sensei lets out a deep breath.

" _I've seen real evil?_ " Hiratsuka-sensei spoke out that sentence from my essay and I immediately looked away from her.

"Are you talking about her?"

"Not really." I tried denying it but without a doubt it was about that person, the person who I thought was what I seek all along, who I used to have feelings for but in the end…that person was just like everyone else.

Nothing but a lie.

"Hikigaya. what happened really? Even since the start of school term, you never once gone to the service club."Hiratsuka-sensei made a concerning look at my direction.

Yes, ever since the start of the school term I decided to stop myself from going anywhere to the clubroom anymore.

I wish I could tell her, but if I did it she would just only worsen the situation by helping us connect together again, and the feelings I worked so hard to discard it would only come back to fool me once again.

"It was a mistake putting me in that god forsaken club in the first place." I said while still looking away from Hiratsuka-sensei.

The service club is just as evil as that person.

People come making request and they accepted it and fulfilled their request. What's important to the service club is the completion of one's request, that's all that matter and that's all there is to it.

"I put you there because I wanted to fix you. That's why requested Yu-"

"Well sorry that it didn't work out." I said as I interrupted her from saying that person's name. It's a name that used to make me feel happiness but now it's a name I despise so much.

"Even if I wanted to come back, what's there to come back to?" I said.

Hiratsuka-sensei fell silent with her eyes casted down to the floor while still standing in front of me.

"Anyway, lunch break is almost over. I'll be heading back now." Without anything to say any further, I started walking towards the exit of the teacher's lounge and exited the room.

As I closed the door behind me, I started heading back to my class.

It's already been a week since the start of my third year of high school. The second year's class arrangement changed as they shifted to third years. The class was arranged by their chosen career paths.

Those who chose sciences ends up in class 3A-3B. There aren't many students who chose the path of science so two classes is efficient enough for the students who went with sciences. While those who took liberal arts are very populated from class 3C-3F.

I walked my way to class through the lively hallway, I took a brief glance outside of the window and the trees of the cherry blossom looked like it's about to bloom anytime soon. After observing the scenery, I removed my gaze from the window and continued walking to class.

My life returns to the way it used to before I joined the service club, but this time it was different. It wasn't as empty as I thought it would be. There's a saying that once you lose something, you gain something in return.

Back then while I was in the service club, I meet new people, get to know with people I'm not familiar and made some connections along the way, it's also because of the service club that some people started acknowledging my existence. So in some way I'm a bit thankful that I did join the service club, at first. There was some good and bad memories coming from it,

But because of that person

That person spoils my good memories of the service club.

* * *

I arrived back to my class, class 3-E, five minutes before lunch break was over. I'm very much surrounded by strangers, well not all of them though. There are people I'm familiar with who still ended up in the same class as me now from my second year of high school.

"Yooo Hikitani-kun!" And Tobe Kakeru was one of them as he dive himself behind my back. _For the last time, that's not my name._

"Ya got reported again huh" Tobe let out cheerful laugh.

"Yeah pretty much, now can you get off me?" I asked and Tobe obediently let himself off from me. _Gah why am I still in the same class with him?_

"Hachiman!" Totsuka entered shortly after I arrived, he's also in the same class as me. _Thank goodness! We're still together, its fate I tell you._

I made a slight nod at Totsuka's direction and started making my way to my seat near the window at the third row from the back. The two followed me behind, as I took my seat and they stood in front of my desk started chatting.

"Ah Totsuka, Have you seen Yumiko?" Tobe asked, and yes Yumiko Miura also ended up in the same class as three of us. So these are the only people I know who were still in the same class as me from class 2-F.

"I think she's next door visiting Yuigahama-san and Ebina-san." Totsuka answered him briefly.

Apparently Yui Yuigahama and Hina Ebina were still in the same class together next door, class 3-F. Miura frequently visited them in their class to hang out and sometimes they visited Miura in our class as well.

When they did, Yuigahama would just go over to me at my seat and talk about a lot of things. Stuff that I don't even give a crap about but it's worthwhile. All I did was read my novel while she was running her mouth.

I find it a bit strange how cheerful she was consider what happened to the service club recently, but I'm glad that she was. I don't want our friendship to only go on being shackled by the constraints of the service club.

"Oh that so?" Tobe tilted his head in response to Totsuka's answer.

"Why don't you go to Hayato, Tobe?" Totsuka asked and Tobe immediately squirmed in response.

"Well, ya know… it's kinda complicated." Tobe answered briefly. I can understand what he meant by complicated.

Ever since that day, during the last day of school term last month when Miura burst out from the classroom crying, Hayama's clique were never the same again and Miura never spoke to him ever since. I'm just glad they don't end up in the same class again, that would be very awkward and tense.

Even though his class is next door as well which is class 3-D, Miura never gave a glance at him or a word to him. Somehow, it's a relieved they stopped talking and not give into a superficial relationship where they would just talk again and acted like nothing happened. What happened between them was something that can't be ignore or forgotten that easily.

"So Hachiman, you keep getting reported. What for anyway?" Totsuka asked regarding about my situation in teacher's lounge.

"Yeahh, what's the sitch?" Tobe was all ears on why I was called as well.

The two of them focused their stares at me, paying attention to me and waiting for my answer. I know I should be glad that someone like Tobe was close to me now, but it's kind of creepy the way he just stares at me. His stare left me with no choice but to answer the question, as long as it could stop that staring.

"Nothing really, I just wrote how this world was full of lies." I said nonchalantly.

Tobe flinched and made an anxious look while Totsuka made a wearily smile at my direction.

 _Sorry I had to reveal this side of me, Totsuka. Please don't leave me._

"That's dark, Hikitani-kun. Total dark."

"I'm just being honest with myself." I said as I looked away from him.

"Well, that's good. It's what I like about Hachiman after all." Totsuka giggled, and I can feel my cheeks were hot, and blushing when he said that.

The bells immediately rang which marks the end of lunch break to resume on with homeroom. Everybody returned to class to their respective seats, and Miura also returned back from next door and took her seat right in front of mine.

"Trouble again?" Miura asked shortly before turning around facing front.

"Y-Yeah." I answered briefly even though she looked like she wasn't paying attention to me.

I laid both of my arms on the table, folding it, and rested my chin on the right palm my hand. I took a brief glance once more of the scenery outside of the window, the sky was clear. There's no cloud to be seen on the blue sky above.

I'm now in third year, my last year of high school. It's a year that I have to take it seriously for the upcoming exams if I wanted to enter my designated university, but somehow, I'm not feeling very motivated about it, maybe because I'm serious of my dream to be a full-time househusband? Or maybe it was something else, if so

What was it?

The sound of the classroom door opened can be heard, and I slowly removed my gaze away from the window.

"Morning class!" The sensei greeted to us.

Once the teacher has arrived, we all took our books out, turning to the page where we left off as class was now in session.

* * *

As each period ended, the bell rang and that concluded the end of homeroom. I cleaned up my desk and pack my books inside my school bag, ready to leave the class.

Miura without a moment to spare quickly left the classroom; it looked like she was in a hurry. Maybe she wanted to leave before Hayama sees her or the other way around.

"Later Hikitani-kun!" Tobe waved his hand at me as he leaves the classroom as well, and I nodded in response.

It seems he's going to soccer practice this afternoon, but I wonder how he acts around Hayama.

Maybe I'll just ignore it, consider how he is he would just act like his usual self. He has a positive mind, too positive though but he's pretty much good in cooling the atmosphere.

"Hachiman, are you free later?" Totsuka approached me from behind; I turned around to him to answer his question. _Wait, are asking me out?_

"Ye-Yeah, I suppose." I answered him. Since I'm not currently joining any club, I have a lot of free time in my hand.

"Good! Could you meet me in the library?" _Yes! This is definitely a date!_

"Sure." I instantly answered him to which he smiled at me in response to my answer. _So angelic!_

"I'm glad, wait for me there okay? I'm heading to the tennis club first to tell them that I won't be joining them for today." Totsuka explained briefly as he exited the classroom immediately.

I oblige his instruction and exit the classroom as well to head to the library. School was still the same as usual, once homeroom ends the students proceeded to head to their respective clubs as for those who doesn't either go home early or just loitering around the school looking for something interesting to kill time.

Even if I don't have any club activity, I can't really go home early since I have to wait for Komachi to finish her club activity.

Komachi entered her first year of high school in the same school as me about a week ago the same time when the new school term started. She's at class 1-B and now joined the literature club? I didn't even know she's into that kind of stuff, guess there are something I don't know about my sister just yet but it looks like she enjoyed her life as a high school student, that's good.

Once I arrived to the library's front door entrance, a loud cheery voice called out my name.

"Hikki!" that voice was none other than Yui Yuigahama.

"I'm glad you made it." Yuigahama smiled at me.

 _Wait what do you mean?_

"I actually came here for Totsuka." I made myself clear to her, to which she put on a blank look.

"What? Didn't Sai-chan tell you? We're doing a group study." Yuigahama made a wearily laugh.

 _Ohh wow, I knew it's too good to be true. Why do you have to invite Yuigahama as well!?_

"Since we have a lot of free time in our hands, we might as well study hard for upcoming exams. Right Hikki?" Yuigahama asked as she was still smiling at my direction.

"Yeah, I suppose so." I agreed with her out of instinct.

That's true; we have free time because we both have no club activity to attend to.

Ever since the start of school term, Yuigahama told me that person have been going home earlier than usual almost everyday. She soon come up with the idea to disband the service club due to its lack of member and her inactivity, at least that's what Yuigahama told me.

Of course Yuigahama protested the idea but that person decided to disband the club anyway, she has every right to because she was the president of the service club.

I guess being in love, can make a person inconsiderate and ignore the opinions of the people around her even Yuigahama of all people, to the point that it sickens me. I can't believe I used to know that person.

I don't want anything to do with that person ever again.

As we entered the library, there were a lot of people present in the library. Most of the tables were occupied. I guess it's either these people are studying or just slacking off to kill time as well.

If they are slacking off, they should really be more considerate to the people who wanted to use the library more than they do especially for study purposes instead of going in, occupying a table just to sleep on it. _That's typical youth for ya._

Yuigahama quickly narrowed her eyes, and started turning her head to search for an empty table.

"Ah that table's empty Hikki!" Yuigahama pointed her finger to the table and quickly ran towards it like she was in the Olympics, claiming the table with her big yellow school bag.

"Be quiet, and you're not supposed to run in here." I reminded her that we're in the library and there are rules and regulations that we have to oblige.

"Hee sorry. Guess I got carried away." Yuigahama took her seat and pull out her books on the table.

"Math huh?"

"Yeah. It's my weakest subject, so I figured I have to work hard on this one." Yuigahama made a wearily laugh as she admits it. But I do admire her determination to work hard, still…

"What do you mean weakest? Aren't you weak on the rest as well?" I asked as I corrected her.

"Shaddup! I made it to Sobu High, so I'm not a dummy, Hikki!" Yuigahama suddenly burst her usual loud voice.

"Oi quiet we're in the library." I mumbled to her and remind her again where we're at.

"Fufufu, what do we have here!?" another voice burst itself out to us; I knew who it was the moment I hear it.

"Zaimokuza? Please don't tell me Totsuka invited you as well." _Please say no, please say no!_

"What a coincidence! We were invited by sir Totsuka as well." _Crap!_

"Actually, I was the one who invited you chunni, still Totsuka told me to." Yuigahama made an irritated look at his direction and let out a deep breath. It seems she doesn't want to invite Zaimokuza in the first place but that can't be helped, they are in the same class after all.

"You guys are loud, as usual. What a pain." Another individual approaches from behind Zaimokuza and it was

 _Kawa- kawa something. Jeez why do I keep forgetting her name?_

"Yahallo Saki!" Yuigahama greeted her with her usual tribal greet yet embarrassing. _Now I remember, Kawasaki. Thanks Yuigahama._

"Be quiet, okay." Kawasaki quickly became flustered by Yuigahama's loud greet. It seems both of our feeling towards Yuigahama's reckless behavior was mutual.

With no further ado, we took our seat on the long wooden table consist of six chairs. How convenient though, we're just lucky that Yuigahama manage to spot this table and claimed it on behalf of us, despite her noisiness and running in the library.

All that's left was to wait for Totsuka. I have no problem waiting for him for a long time but I can't say the same for the others. While waiting Yuigahama took out her math texbooks and notes as she tries to solve some of the question on her own. She puts on a serious expression, and was biting the edge of her pen everytime she can't solve it.

 _Umm. That's not healthy, you know._

* * *

We all waited in silence. Zaimokuza who seated at my left, crossed his arms and closed his eyes looking like his meditating and as for Kawasaki who was sitting vertically of me, rested her chin on her hand and only stared at Yuigahama who was seated at her right, looking worried everytime she bit her pen.

"So what are we studying anyway?" I asked.

"Math of course." Yuigahama answered by reflex.

 _Math huh? I highly doubt everyone here on the table is good with the Math, and it's already pretty clear that I'm not any good with subject as well.._ It seems our tutor for today will be Totsuka.

It's strange; I never even knew he was good with math to begin with. Seems like I didn't dig deep enough.

I heard steps' coming to our direction as it's getting closer and closer. I turned around and it was Totsuka.

"Sorry, did I make you wait?" Totsuka made a worried look at us.

All of us immediately gazed at his direction.

"Welcome sir Totsuka, glad you have made it to the battlefield." Said General Zaimokuza while still meditating. _What battlefield? We're here to study Maths not going to war._

But unfortunately, I kind of understood his reference. Math is probably one of the most difficult subjects to overcome. So it is like battlefield.

"It's not a big deal." Kawasaki briefly answered him.

"Yeah, Yuigahama pretty much amuse the boredom." I said while facing front at her.

"Eh? What do you mean by that." Yuigahama started complaining a bit.

"Really? I'm glad" Totsuka let out a giggle as a relief, and took his seat at Zaimokuza's left side.

"How about you start by helping Yuigahama solve her math problem so she could stop biting her pen." I said while my gaze was elsewhere from them.

Kawasaki silently nodded in agreement with my statement as well as Zaimokuza.

Totsuka immediately let out a dry laugh, "Well you see, I'm not good with math at all."

We all made a surprising look at his direction. _So if you're not good with Math then who is?_

"That's why invited one more person, and she's okay with it." Totsuka explained briefly. _She?_

Suddenly I heard light steps coming to our table; I didn't bother to turn around to see who it was because I got the feeling that I already knew who Totsuka was talking about.

"Good afternoon everyone."

That voice, an unforgettable. A voice that I haven't heard for quite a while. The voice belongs to that person,

Yukino Yukinoshita.

"Ah thanks for coming Yukinshita-san." Totsuka welcomed her.

While the others seems to be speechless. My gazed was directly on the table the entire time as I could feel stares were focusing at my direction from my front and my left.

Almost everybody in school knows that Yukinoshita and Hayama are a couple since people have saw them going home together after school almost every day, so it's no secret to them as well.

 _What should I do? Should I leave?_

If I leave now, the atmosphere would only be more uncomforting. I don't want to ruin the study group because of me, because how I used to feel towards her. That would be just selfish of me, and would that prove that I never did move on. So for now, I have to endure for the sake of this study group.

"Yeah. thanks for coming." I said in an attempt to make myself looked like I knew she was coming so they could stop worrying about me and just proceed to the study group.

"It's no problem at all." Yukinoshita said with a calming voice.

"Please have a seat." Said Totsuka and Yukinoshita started making her way to her seat next to Yuigahama.

I took a peek at Yukinoshita, her expression was calm and beautiful. After I did, I removed my gazed from her and proceeded in taking out my math notes as well.

"Ah glad you could join us Yukinon." Yuigahama put up her usual cheery smile to further drive away the tension in the atmosphere.

After a while, the atmosphere became normal again, or at least that's what it was to everyone except for me, because no one knew what Yukinoshita said the last time we spoke to each other on the phone, except me.

 _Nothing more than just a request, huh?_

"Shall we begin?" Yukinoshita asked, and we nodded, turning our attention to her as we begin the group study.

* * *

An hour has passed; we started understanding where we didn't on math because of Yukinoshita. We silently worked out the equation on a piece of paper and compare it with our note, practicing and practicing til we get the right the right answer. We only asked Yukinoshita when one of us were having trouble with a certain topic, or solving the question at hand.

I never did ask any question so far, if I didn't understand I would only ask Kawasaki who was sitting in front of me to elaborate what she learnt from Yukinoshita on certain topics. Kawasaki pretty much didn't mind at all.

While the guy on my left, Zaimokuza fell asleep with his head lying on the table not long ago after Yukinoshita started elaborating the solution of each problem in math.

Right now Yukinoshita was busy explaining something to Yuigahama as she nodded in response whenever Yukinoshita asked her whether she understands or not.

While Totsuka looked like he was into it as he was busy writing some numbers on his paper the entire time and only asked when he doesn't understand something.

Suddenly a phone vibration was heard, and it came from Yukinoshita's direction. Yukinosita quickly reached out to her phone to check who it was from. Obviously all of us knew who it was from.

"Sorry Yuigahama-san. Now, where were we?" Yukinoshita asked with an expressionless face.

"It's okay, umm here it's how the right ang-"

Yukinoshita phone vibrated again, interrupting Yuigahama's question and everyone except Zaimokuza who was asleep and me who could careless removed their gazed from the table and looked at her direction.

Yukinoshita immediately opened her phone and quickly typed something before closing it again.

"My apologies, now what was it again?" Yukinoshita asked for Yuigahama's question.

Yuigahama made a slight nod.

"It's how-"

Yukinoshita phone vibrated once more interrupting Yuigahama's question once again. Yuigahama frowned immediately and her eyes were casted down on the table.

"Never mind." Yuigahama muttered.

I feel sorry for Yuigahama, she wanted to study her best with Yukinoshita yet Yukinoshita put her phone first instead of Yuigahama's resolve to study. Just how low and thoughtless did Yukinoshita get?

I heard a pen being clenched really hard in front of me, and it was Kawasaki's as her hand that clenched on the pen tremble. I looked at her face; her eyes were on the table as she gritted her teeth.

"Is he really that important to you?" Kawasaki asked, her question was directly to Yukinoshita. There was aggression behind her voice.

She let out a sigh before continuing on while Yukinoshita remain calmed and silent.

While everyone else gazed at Kawasaki, except Zaimokuza.

"Is he that important that you have to keep sending messages to him and skip this girl's question?"

"Right now, you're making her hard work go to waste."

"Talk about rude coming from a girl born a silver spoon."

Kawasaki puts her pen down and rested her face on her hand before continuing on.

"I don't understand what you see in that guy."

"I see him everyday in class, always smiling and always laughing."

"You know what I call people like that?" Kawasaki shifted her gazed from the table and started glaring at Yukinoshita's direction.

"Faker."

"And here I thought you hated those types..."

"Hiding themselves, lying to everyone every day with a smile."

"People like those, disgust me."

Yukinoshita glared coldly to Kawasaki.

"It's not of your concern. I don't expect you to understand."

"Please.I don't intend on understanding a person as horrible as you." Kawasaki glared at her

Yukinoshita flinched a bit by her sentence.

"This person here." Kawasaki refers to me. I twitch a moment when she brought me in. _Umm, this person has a name you know._

"He's been asking questions from me the whole time."

It seems Kawasaki realized that I was trying to avoid Yukinoshita.

"After everything what he's done for you and the club… you did something to make this guy looked like he's about to wet his pants.. I don't know what you did but…"

"..It's a sight I can't stand."

"And the girl right here." Kawasaki immediately brought up Yuigahama.

"She loved that place, that club. She treasure that place, being with you and this guy, but what do you do? You threw it away, like it's nothing."

"You threw it all away, over a boy."

"How sweet." Kawasaki said sarcastically, there was no warmth behind her voice.

Yukinoshita didn't say anything any further except exchanging glares with Kawasaki.

I knew if this goes on, it won't end well. This has to stop.

"Kawasaki, that's enough." I said, Kawasaki immediately stopped her glaring and stared at my direction.

Both Totsuka and Yuigahama stared at me as well with a concerned look.

"It's her decision, so let it be." I mumbled, and Kawasaki looked like she's about to protest it but she stopped herself from exchanging anymore blows with Yukinoshita.

"I'll be taking my leave first."

"Sorry for causing any trouble, and thank you for coming Yukinoshita-san." I slightly bowed my head to her; I clenched my fist feeling disgusted with myself by my action to Yukinoshita.

I lifted my head to look at her, and she nodded in response with a her unchanged cold expression.

I shoved my books and notes inside my school bag, as I stood up, Yuigahama stood from her seat as well looking very worried. She looked like she was about to say something but I stopped her by shaking my head. She sits back down on her seat with her eyes casted down on the table.

"Hachiman.." Totsuka made a concerned look at my direction.

I made a small smile at his direction, trying to ease him a bit.

"Later." Kawasaki said while looking away from me.

"Yeah." I briefly responded to her.

And as for Zaimokuza who was currently snoring like snorlax, I ignored him and let him sleep.

I gazed at Yukinoshita again, and nodded to her once more, she nodded back in response.

As I walked away from the table and started making my way to the exit, I felt something sour in my mouth, everything from my mouth to inside felt sour. As I swallowed it, it resurfaces even more sour in my mouth.

 _What is this?_

 _I thought I have discarded all the necessary feelings I have towards her. I was supposed to feel nothing from her, yet… I feel unsatisfied. What am I unsatisfied with?_

I reached out to the doorknob of the exit, and it was extremely cold. The coldness of the doorknob put me back to my senses.

The sour feeling instantly disappeared by the coldness. As I turned the doorknob clockwise and exited the library, I've decided to forget what I felt and move on.

* * *

 **Next chapter 2: Hayato Hayama unexpectedly causes trouble for him.**


	3. Hayama Hayato unexpectedly

**Please leave a review everyone! And sorry in advance for any error :D**

* * *

 **Chapter 2: Hayama Hayato unexpectedly causes trouble for him.**

* * *

The sun begins to set, and the sky becomes more and more orange in color as time passed by. It was still the following afternoon after I left the library. It was an awkward situation, maybe because I didn't expect Yukinoshita to join our group study despite knowing the possibility that I would be there as well.

I thought she would just reject Totsuka's invitation to avoid me as I've avoided her. Once she was there, I was thinking of leaving straightaway, but I can't do that, I can't just let my past with Yukinoshita to effect the present and the people around me. It would just be selfish of me.

The atmosphere was tense and it became tenser when Yukinoshita ignored Yuigahama's will to study just to check on her phone. After Yukinoshita paired up with Hayama, it was like she became different person; much colder, thoughtless and selfish, ignoring the people's mood around her which causes Kawasaki to started blabbering stuff to Yukinoshita's face. As much as I enjoyed seeing how Yukinoshita reacted to her words, why did Kawasaki have blabber out like that all the sudden?

So because of that, I took my leave first from the library. I just can't stand the quarreling, Yukinoshita ignoring Yuigahama's resolve to study, Yuigahama's disappointment being ignored by Yukinoshita, Kawasaki's word to Yukinoshita and also Totsuka's worrying expression at me. Totsuka was never aware of my relationship with Yukinoshita in the past, that's why he invited her anyway.

Things really have changed between Yukinoshita and both of me and Yuigahama. Yukinoshita was now just someone we used to know, someone I used to have feelings for… but not anymore.

Youth Love is an evil entity that changes a person to the worse. I'm glad I didn't experience it before I did in the past, otherwise I would just be someone like her right now.

After leaving the library, I only have an hour left until Komachi finishes with her club activity. I thought surely I would stay in the library with the group until then but it looks like I have to think something else to do to kill time.

Time is slow, and it's even slower when all you do is check your watch and have nothing to distract yourself with. Hence, the saying _time flies when you're having fun_ comes from.

I could feel myself slowly becoming sluggish while walking through the empty hallway of school that was submerged in a silent atmosphere. Compare to this morning, there weren't many students roaming around the hallway at this time. The reason was probably due to some classes having their extended homeroom while some are probably consume on their club activity at their designated area. So the hallway population was only me and a couple of ants near the window.

I started descending the stairs from the hallway of the second floor and make myself to the front entrance of the school. I changed my shoes, and went over to the vending machine outside of the school entrance to purchase myself a MAX COFFEE. Drinking the coffee never fails to sooth the bitter feelings inside me; even though the taste is bitter itself. It's like breaking rocks with rocks but in this case bitter with bitter.

After I bought my coffee, I started heading my way to a certain spot near the open field of Sobu high where the soccer club and tennis club were having their practices. Yes, I'm talking about my usual spot where I usually have my lunch, on the first floor of the special building, to the side of the nurse's office and diagonally behind the cafeteria. I took my seat on the small staircase, opened my can of MAX COFFEE and took my novel out from my school bag to read it while sipping my drink to kill time until Komachi finishes.

The breeze was relaxing, blowing my hair back and forth and I took another sip of my coffee while eyes were focused on the novel. I took a brief glance of the surrounding in front of me, the tennis club were practicing inside the tennis court where they just moved around following the ball in the air to hit to the opposing side at the right time while the soccer club were also having their practices as well, Hayama looked like he was giving instruction to the freshmen of Sobu high who joined the club by teaching them a few tricks keeping the ball rolling in fornt him across the open field. I could also see Tobe sitting on the open field drinking the water from his bottle and wipe the sweat on his face. He looks serious in practices compare to outside club activity; he's nothing but a jester. I guess he wants to be an idol to his junior just as Hayama was.

"Senpaiiiiiii!" I could hear a voice calling out to me from a far distance from the direction where I was facing.

I removed my gaze from my novel and lifted my head to see who it was calling out to me.

"Senpaiiii!" and it was Iroha Isshiki, the president of the student council and the manager of the soccer club. She was running to my direction in her track suit. It looks like she's not attending the student council.

Isshiki immediately stopped running as she was already in front of me. I took a brief glance at her before continuing reading my novel once more.

"What are you doing here, senpai?" Isshiki asked while my eyes were busy on my novel I didn't bother to look at her face for what expression she was making when she asked me that.

"What's it look like?"

"It looks like your pretending to read your book but actually you're stalking, right?"

 _Just where did she get that idea from!?_

"Yes, I'm stalking you actually." I answered her anyway without giving it a thought or care as long as I could regain the peace I had before she's here.

"Eeeeh!? What? So gross!"

 _Yup, you should leave._ My eyes were still on my novel. _Just leave already._

"Well I can't let you do that, so I'll just have to sit here to stop you from stalking me…heee." Isshiki lets out a chuckle as she took her seat near me on the small staircase. _There goes by peace and quiet._

I let out a sigh once she did.

I closed my book knowing that I couldn't focus with her around, so all I did was sip through my coffee and watch the sight of the people practicing their sport activities.

"Senpai!" Isshiki called to me noisily.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Huh?"

 _What's with this girl?_

 _It looks like she wants me to start a conversation or something? Fine fine._

"So you're not attending the student council?"

"Well no. I haven't been to the soccer club lately so that's why I'm here."

"So why aren't you there right now?"

"It looks like they could manage without me there." Isshiki answered briefly with her eyes gazing at the soccer field.

"You sure the student council can handle without their president?"

"That's what Vice president are there for, senpai."

"Then why-"

"Senpai… just how bad do you want to get rid of me anyway?"

Isshiki manage to figure out my true motive. She narrowed her eyes at me while I only looked away and took another sip of my coffee.

"A lot of things happened after graduation huh?" Isshiki brought up the subject, I knew what she's talking about.

"It looks like the rumor isn't a rumor after all." Isshiki made a dry laugh while her eyes were still gazing at the soccer club.

"Yeah, I suppose." I said nonchalantly and sipped my coffee.

"Still, I can't believe she stopped the service club. I thought it was more than just a club to her. I kind of missed it."

"Well when you're in love, it could make you do all kinds of crazy things. Especially when you're with someone like Hayama. You should know that." I explained briefly to Isshiki.

"I know, I was all over Hayama-senpai back then."

"Even so, if it were me..."

"..I don't plan on sacrificing everything I worked up for or anyone if that matter, just to be with someone I love."

"I don't want that kind of relationship, even if it's Hayama-senpai."

"It's just not worth sacrificing over. You know?"

I was a bit taken aback by Isshiki's statement. For a sly, she's right.

I thought she was the same as well, but I guess I was wrong. I underestimated Isshiki thinking that she's a desperate young woman who would do anything and wanted nothing more but love from Hayama but I guess even Isshiki has her self-importance. She really has grown.

"You really are full of surprises." I made a small smile at her direction.

"Ehhh wai-wait, are you hitting on me? I'm sorry senpai but-"

"Save it."

I managed to stop Isshiki before she could run her mouth. I'm glad I did. _Phew._

I began gulping what's left of my coffee and threw it in the rubbish bin. Me and Isshiki didn't say anything further after, and all we could do now was sit and watch the people in the open field doing their club activity.

Isshiki was humming with a smile on her face; she's amazing, the fact that she could still maintain her happiness even though Hayama was way out of her reach. It seems she's moved on from him.

Happiness can't only be obtained from love alone. There are other ways to have happiness in life without being in love.

Love is just a shortcut to happiness, but I don't intend on skipping or cutting any corners of experiences. _Having happiness as easy as that is just not.._

 _Just not…._

"Ahh Onii-chan!" I turned my head to the direction of the voice behind me, Isshiki did so as well.

"Ah Komachi you finished?" I asked just to be sure.

"Yup. Ohh, Yahallo Iroha-senpai!"

"Yahallo Komachi-chan!"

I watched the two greeted each other, ever since freshmen week last week which was held by the student council, those two have been getting closer. I've always looked at Isshiki as a little sister when I'm at school but now that Komachi's a student of Sobu high, I feel like I have two sister now. _It's heaven!_

"Have you waited long Onii-chan?"

"Not really, I was in a group study earlier with Totsuka but I left early."

"Ohh okay."

I was a bit relieved that Komachi didn't ask for the reason I left early. Both soccer players and tennis stopped their practices and started packing their things up as they concluded their activity for today to head home.

"Ohh, I better head back to pack things up. See you senpai and Komachi-chan!"

"Bye Iroha-senpai!"

Isshiki went back to the soccer field after she waved her hand, Komachi waved her hand as well to her. I guess it's time to leave now.

"Let's get out here." I said and Komachi nodded in response carrying her school bag on her shoulder as we headed to the venue where I parked my bike.

Once we arrived to the bike park venue, I unlocked my bike and started pushing it along to the main gate. Komachi followed me behind with an expressionless face. Once we're halfway to the main gate, I immediately stopped my tracks and Komachi stopped in reflex as well. I was stopped as my eyes were met with a nostalgic sight, a sight that made everyone know and proves they are a couple.

It was the sight of Hayama and Yukinoshita waiting for their ride together at the front gate. I did not see what expression they're making on their faces or hear what they were conversing about.

As their limousine approaches, it was the same routine, Hayama opens the door for Yukinoshita, Hayama entered the limousine after and drove away from school. I did nothing but watched and waited for them to leave the entire time.

"Onii-chan….." Komachi sounded very worry behind me. She knew as well as everyone about them.

For once I didn't feel anything at all by it. I guess maybe I've accepted it and moved on, just like Isshiki did.

"Let's go." I ignored what I saw and started walking again pushing my bike along to the main gate, once there I hopped onto my bike and Komachi got on as well, as she wrapped her arms around me for a safe ride home.

* * *

What did I feel?

I dare ask myself that knowing the answer will forever question me.

The first time I did saw them, I felt an unbearable pain around my chest, it felt like it was something was holding it, constricting it like a python constricting its prey to death before devouring it.

But now, I'm not quite sure what I feel right now, I can't fully grasp between a feeling of emptiness or something else. The answer keeps speculating itself already inside my head.

For that, I regret asking myself that in the first place.

"We're Home!"

Me and Komachi safely arrived home, both our mom and dad aren't usually back around this time so the only living thing we declared our return to was to our beloved cat Kamakura.

As soon as we removed our outdoor shoes near the doorway, we proceeded inside to the living room where I rested on the sofa after pedaling home. Komachi was busy filling in Kamakura's empty bowl with cat food. I don't usually pedal passengers home but now that Komachi goes to the same school as me, it can't be helped; it's double the effort after all so it's exhausting.

"Onii-chan"

"Yes?"

After Komachi finished tending to Kamakura, she took her seat and sat beside me on the sofa with a serious expression. Everytime Komachi made that look, it's always about me.

"Hiratsuka-sensei…. Talked to me this morning."

I don't like where this was going, so I stayed silent and just listened to her.

"She's worried about you onii-chan."

Komachi's serious expression just now, turned into a worried expression as she gazed at my direction while my eyes were focused what's in front of me.

"She might think it has something to do with Yukino-san."

"I'm fine Komachi." I responded to her.

I lied because everytime I hear that name, my heart skips its rhythm beats, I began sweating a little and felt bit of anxiety within me.

"Are you sure onii-chan?"

"Yes I told you didn't I?" Komachi was being stubborn. My patience was tested.

"Onii-chan, it's okay to talk abou-"

"I told you I'm fine!"

Without thinking, I suddenly burst out and shouted at Komachi.

Komachi flinched in response and back up a little from me, she was shocked by my sudden outburst. My body acted on its own without thinking.

Tears started forming around Komachi's eyes and I immediately withdrew back to my senses by the sight.

"Sorry." I dropped my gaze down to the floor, guilty about my action to Komachi. That was cruel of me, my sister was worried about me yet I, I shouted at her. I didn't mean to.

"It's okay onii-chan." Komachi put up a forced smile to smooth the situation, even after what I did she still forgives me, yet I couldn't forgive myself for acted harshly on her.

"I'll head to my room. Let me know when dinner's ready."

Komachi nodded in response still forcing herself to smile.

As I slowly walked up the stairs, I took a sneak glance at Komachi one more time and her smile was replaced with an expression that looked like she was on the verge of breaking down. I felt even guiltier by looking at her; I continued walking to my room clenching my hands and closed the door behind me.

 _Just why did do that? What's gotten into me?_

My phone suddenly vibrated in my school bag, I began unzipping it and started rummaging the contents inside for my phone. I pulled my phone out and checked who it was.

Yui Yuigahama.

 _Wow, this day just keeps getting better and better._

I was torn between whether to answer it or ignore it, because I know she will converse what transpire this afternoon. I was afraid to answer her because I might burst out all the sudden to her, just like what I did to Komachi.

Still, I answered the phone anyway to keep myself in checked.

"Hello?"

"Yahallo Hikki!"

Yuigahama's loud voice startled me a bit.

"What do you want?"

"I call to see if you're alright, I mean you left early so I was a bit worried."

I appreciate her concerned for me, still I don't know if I'm fine or not.

"I'm fine." I lied to her anyway. I had to.

"Sorry that I left you guys."

"Ohh that's okay Hikki. I know you left because…"

"Anyway how's the group study?" I interrupted her from continuing her sentence and intentionally changed the subject.

"It's alright I guess. After you left, Yukinon apologized to all of us and Kawasaki apologized to her as well for the stuff she said."

"It's thanks to Yukinon, I understand a lot today!" Yuigahama giggled through the phone.

"Well that's good hear."

 _I'm glad things worked out…_ After knowing from Yuigahama that both Yukinoshita and Kawasaki apologized to each other, I felt at ease again, the warmth in my body started coming back and I feel relaxed.

I walked towards my bed and threw myself onto it still continuing the call with Yuigahama.

"Eh!? What was that!?" Yuigahama asked

"I'm just lying down that's all." I answered briefly.

"Okay. Anyway after we finished, we woke Chunni up."

I was in silence, and listened to her.

"After he did, he started asking where were you and he was all like.."

" _Gahh! Hachiman! How dare you leave your comrades to die!_ He startled everyone in the library, and the librarian got mad at us. It was embarrassing and funny at the same time." Yuigahama let out a small sigh on the phone.

I chuckled and manage to smile a bit.

"That's just like Zaimokuza." I said briefly.

"Hey Hikki, Yumiko told me that you got reported again. What's up anyway?" Yuigahama asked regarding my report to the teacher's lounge this afternoon. I guess I could answer that.

"Well because I wrote an out of topic essay." I answered her briefly.

"Ohh is that so, it must've been that bad to get reported like that. What's it about anyway?"

"Well about how reality works" I answered her what my essay was about.

Yuigahama went silent for a brief moment before speaking out again.

"…Hikki… if it's about Yukin-"

"Anyway Komachi called me, it looks like dinner is ready. So I'll get going."

"Eh Hikki wai-"

"Bye Yuigahama."

 _Sorry Yuiga, I lied._

I quickly closed the phone. Before she could even talk about that person… _Why does everybody keep bringing her in?_

Just when our phone call cheered me up a bit, she just had to mention that person. Yukino Yukinoshita.

Everytime that name was mentioned in front of me, my feelings became unsettling to the point that my body acted on its own, just like it did during my conversation with Komachi. I still couldn't forget that. Maybe I should properly apologize to Komachi later.

I continued lying myself on my bed, with my head resting on both of my hands behind it. I'm not even sure with myself anymore, I thought I had discarded all the feelings I felt towards that person. The only feeling I should left with was my hatred towards her, what she did was unforgiveable, so why do I feel unsatisfied?

It was ever since I found out the truth behind Yukinoshita's action, I closed myself away, shutting anyone out from entering, not letting myself get fooled again and be destroyed from the inside out.

I opened my phone again and decided to scroll its gallery just to shake off my boredom. Most of the pictures that were taken by my phone usually are a picture of Komachi doing her what they call…ah, right, _selfie._ Komachi looked so cute in each of them. As I further scrolled the gallery on my phone, my eyes then met with a picture that brings a nostalgic feeling to it.

It was the picture of the service club that Isshiki took after we finished her assignment about free newspaper. I still can't believe we manage to finish it in just a short time.

I thought this picture looked like it's gonna be one of those coming-of-age family portrait but its better than I expected. I continued staring at the picture; my position was in the middle sitting on the chair between those two behind me. Yuigahama wore her usual energetic smile, people could tell how noisy of a person Yuigahama is just by looking at this kind of smile, it's a smile that suits her whole personality.

My eyes then met with Yukinoshita on the picture, she wore a calm yet beautiful smile, her skin that described her name itself, her eyes glistering blue like the sun that reflects its light upon the clear blue sea. My stares were fixated on her for a while, after I realized that I quickly stopped myself and closed my phone throwing it aside of me.

I thought I had lost myself for a second there. Despite how beautiful her appearance on the outside, I can't say the same for her inside because what's inside of her, was the ugly truth.

* * *

It was the following morning at school. Last night during dinner, I properly apologized to Komachi and as expected she forgives me then this morning when we're having breakfast it seems we're on good terms with each other already, despite what happened last night she acted like nothing's happened.

I don't know whether she forgets it or not, but if it were me I wouldn't. I shouted at Komachi, if I were in her shoes I'd either be terrified or traumatized because it's the first time I acted harshly to her. But at least we're still talking.

As I made it to the third floor of the school building where all the third year classes was located, I started walking my way to class through the lively, chattering hallway. Class won't start for another 15 minutes, so the student are free to stand and roam around the hall visiting their friends in different classes. All of the class door were left opened as I walked by each of them, as I was about to walked by class 3-C, a certain someone came into my field of vision as I took a sneak glance inside the class while slowly walking pass by the opened door of class 3-C.

It was Yukinoshita, who seems to be on her seat reading a book. As I walked by she lifted her head from her book and our eyes accidentally met with each other. I averted quickly from her and continued walking with a fast pace passing her class and moved on to the next one, class 3-D.

The Class of 2-J which consisted of 99% female student was no longer bounded by just female as they entered their third year, mainly because of the separate career paths they chosen and since there's no 3-J, they started scattering themselves in each different classes of the third year. So now they're just as normal as us.

Just one more class to walk by to reach my destination. I walked pass the first opened door of class 3-D, and when I tried to walk pass by the second door, Hayama emerges from his classroom and stood in my path. I flinched and froze when he did; he noticed me and puts on a worried expression.

"Hikigaya, do you have a minute?" he asked.

"No." I instantly answered him and took a step forward and passed by him.

"Hikigaya. I want to talk to you for a moment. it's about Yuki-"

"We have nothing to say to each other Hayama." I said, with a bit of aggression behind my voice also my fists clenched itself automatically.

There it is again….the same feeling I had back then when I shouted to Komachi. It's a feeling of something's about to rupture in me.. The last time I experienced this resulting in me shouting at Komachi without even thinking.

 _It's like my brain have no control over my body anymore…it's as if my body only respond to what I feel…my emotions…._

It seems like I have to keep my emotions in check from now on. Who knows what I'll do the next time I outburst like that again without thinking, so that's why I try to avoid and keep my distance away from Hayama as far as possible for his sake and my own.

I ignored him, and arrived to my class. It seems Yuigahama and Ebina paid Miura a visit, they were gathering around her table while Yuigahama, pulled a chair behind her from my seat nonchalantly.

"Oi Yuiga, that's my chair." I pointed out to her.

"Yahallo Hikki!" Yuigahama greeted me with her usual yet embarrassing greeting.

"Yea sure, now. My chair. Please." I said

Yuigahama made a wearily laugh in response and obediently stood up from my chair and moved away from it.

"Here you go!"

"Th-Thanks." I immediately settled myself on my seat and dropped my school bag on the desk.

"Hey Hikki, sorry about last night." Yuigahama made a worried look at my direction.

"What do you mean? You did cheer me up a bit to be honest." I meant what I said, Yuigahama smiled and giggled in response.

"Really? That's good to hear." Yuigahama returned to Miura again after briefly said that. _What a relieve…_

"Ah, morning Hikitani-kun!"

"Morning Hachiman."

Tobe and Totsuka gathered themselves around my seat and greeted me a good morning as well.

"Morning you two." I replied them and instinctively narrowed my eyes on them. _Well it seems you are getting closer….._

After I greeted them back, Tobe started running his loud mouth about his youth adventure in life as usual while doing hand gestures. Totsuka gazed at him looking like he's interested, while I did nothing but rested my chin on my right hand and pretended to listen to him. _Boy I sure could use a Yamato and an Ooka about now._

Ever since Tobe didn't end up in the same class with one of those guys, me and Totsuka became their replacement to listen to his loud energetic mouth running in the morning. The three girls in front didn't seem to listen to him as they were engaged in their own conversation.

After briefly observing and analyzed everything around me, I switched my gaze to the scenery outside. Like every other day in this month, the sky was clear and no clouds to be seen, reason for this was probably the plants and flowers need the full extension of the light of the sun in their photosynthesis process for their mineral on their growth and eventually bloom for spring.

"…So I kicked the ball, and it's a gooooal! Uh?" Suddenly Tobe's mouth stopped running once he noticed me gazing the scenery.

"Yo Hikitani-kun you there?"

"Hmm? Ye-yeah." I stammered a bit after being slightly exposed.

"You ain't listening are ya?" Tobe asked once more.

"Well…" I was unable to think of any way out from that. _Here we go again…_

"So mean Hikitani-kun!" Tobe immediately embraced Totsuka and made a tearless sob on Totsuka's right shoulder… _.Oi get away from my Totsuka! Have you no sense of decency!?_

Suddenly the sound of the bell was heard throughout the campus which marks the start of homeroom period. Everybody, including Tobe and Totsuka returned to their seats while the visitors in our class left the classroom to return to theirs.

"See you later Yumiko! Bye Hikki!" Yuigahama and Ebina took their leave from the classroom as well. I nodded in response while Miura made a small waved with her hand at their direction.

As soon as they left, Miura finished and lowered her hand, she quickly turned her face to me and just glared at me. My head twitched a bit due to her sudden glare.

"W-What?" I asked.

When I did, she just ignored me and turned back to the front of her seat facing the board of the class.

 _Jeez if you want to say something then say it… what is up with her lately…_

* * *

It was lunch break

I've decided to treat Komachi to lunch to make up for what happened last night, so here I am on the first floor leaning against the wall in the hallway outside of class 1-C.

The students on the first floor are mostly first year. Every time a student in groups that walked pass by me in the hallway, made a brief stare at me, analyzing my appearance quickly then they started whispering to each other with a disgusted look on their faces after. It was obviously an insult. I wouldn't be surprised; it wasn't anything new at all. A thing like that never gets old for me. I'm already used to it anyway.

Komachi then went outside of her class and saw me, she immediately made a confusing look at my direction as she approached me.

"Ah onii-chan? Were you waiting for me?" Komachi asked still looking confused.

"As a matter of fact I am. Come, I'll treat you to lunch."

She instantly smiles when she heard that. _Greedy…._

"Ah really onii-chan!?" Komachi giggled a bit and made a grin on her face.

"Yeah, now come on." I briefly said and started walking to head to the cafeteria; Komachi nodded and obediently followed me from behind.

After we purchased our foods and drinks from the cafeteria, I led Komachi to my special spot outside of the school's special building diagonally of the cafeteria on the first floor where I usually eat my lunch alone.

"Ah this is so relaxing!" Komachi let out a deep breath of relieve after drinking her water.

"I'm glad you're enjoying it. This is big bro's special spot." I started to smug her and a smirk made its way to my mouth.

"You mean where you usually eat alone? And please onii-chan, wipe that smirk off your face it's creeping me out." Komachi made a disgusted look and looked away from me.

 _How mean, especially to the guy who just treats you to lunch…_

As I finished off my sandwich, I began gulping my drink and wiped my mouth for any leftover along with my smirk as well.

"Onii-chan, you really don't need to treat me to lunch just because you felt bad for what happened last night." Komachi briefly stated her mind and I was surprised that she saw through me.

"How did you-"

"It's very obvious and very simple you know. You treat me the day after you shouted me to make me feel better but like I said onii-chan, it's okay." Komachi gazed at my direction and made her usual cute smile.

I remain silent and let her finish her sentences.

"You're my onii-chan after all so no matter what mistakes you made to me as long as you apologize though, I will always say it's okay. Ah I'm sure that line scored high Komachi points!" Komachi quickly grin and wagged her index finger.

"Oh and I'm sorry as well. I guess I was being too stubborn and tried to force you to spill the beans out but onii-chan, if you're ever going through some hard time, you know I'm always here to hear you out if you feel like letting it out, okay?"

"Thanks Komachi." I smiled at her direction and she shook her head indicating it's no big deal.

"Plus you shouting at me just prove that you're a human after all." Komachi smiled as she said that nonchalantly.

"You mean you've never see me as a human to begin with?" I asked with a confused look.

"Nope!" Komachi still smiled when she answered me point blank.

"So mean…"

* * *

Lunch break was almost over, so I walked Komachi back to her class, she insisted on walking back her own at first because she doesn't want to be seen walking with me due to the fact it might ruin her reputation, that's true though I did argue about that not so long ago with Yuigahama and Yukinoshita back during our time in the service club. So I walked her just halfway to her class.

After walking her back, I immediately went to the restroom to wash my hand further cleaning it after eating. I checked myself on the mirror and inspect my teeth just in case if there's any leftover stucked between my tooth, there seems to be none.

Once I finished with myself, I exited the restroom to head back to class but at the same time, there was also another person who exited from the female restroom next to me, it was Yukino Yukinoshita. We both stared at each other with expressionless face for a brief moment.

"Good morning."

"Yo."

We both exchanged greet and started walking to class. I walked ahead with both my hands placed inside my pocket while she followed me from behind.

"Hikigaya-kun." I immediately stopped my track when she called my name, I didn't bother to turn around to her and only listened what she has to say.

"I want to properly apologize to you. For what happened yesterday afternoon." Yukinoshita said with a calm voice.

"It was thoughtless of me and selfish for ignoring Yuigahama-san like that."

"That's why I'm-"

"That's why you're a bitch, right?" I said nonchalantly interrupting her attempt to apologize. Every word she said to me now, didn't mean a damn thing to me.

I heard a slight gasp coming from her direction.

"You should know better not to be seen walking around me, otherwise your boyfriend might get the wrong idea." That was my way of saying…

 _Stay the hell away from me._

After I made my statement to her, I took a step forward and started walking again to class, leaving her standing there. I didn't bother to turn around to see what expression she was making when I said that, because she's not worth my sight. Not anymore.

But even though I said that, even though I think that, I feel a sudden sense of guilt taking over me along with the returning of the sour taste filling my mouth from yesterday once again. Why?

 _Just go away already.._

* * *

As class ended one by one, I couldn't focus my mind on studying at all in each class. All I could focus was counting the remaining hours before school was over.

And then, the bell rang which concluded homeroom for today. People grabbed their school bags and headed to their club while those who didn't quickly went home or just stayed in class.

"Later Hikitani-kun!" Tobe shuffled his way out of class to attend his club activity as well.

"Yumiko!" Then Yuigahama and Ebina showed up, called out Miura from outside the class, Yuigahama made a small waved and smiled at my direction. I didn't respond at all.

"Coming!" Miura replied to her, as she packed everything on her desk inside her school bag then stood from her seat and headed towards their direction.

When she met up with them, all three of them started walking away from class; it seems those three have plans together. While all I did, was rested my head on my arms on the table exhaustingly.

My mind was in a complete dazed after bumping into Yukinoshita earlier. When I did, I made my declaration to her to stay away from me, indirectly though. She's a smart young woman and she knows how I do things after knowing each other for so long so she probably realized what I meant. I hope so.

"Oi you." A voice coming from above me was heard, I lifted my head from where I rested and it was Kawasaki.

"Need something?" I asked half-heartedly, to be honest I'm too tired for anything. _So please go away and let me be._

"What's wrong with you?" Kawasaki noticed my fatigue.

"Don't change the subject. What do you want?" I said, Kawasaki glared at me just for a brief moment, and then she rubs her neck and looked away from me.

"I ah.. just wanted to say..sorry for spitting out stuff like that yesterday.." Kawasaki said still looking away.

"I'm not the one who you should be apologizing to, it's Yukinoshita. But I heard from Yuigahama that you did apologize to her so it's cool." I said nonchalantly.

 _To be honest, either way I don't really care if she apologizes to Yukinoshita or not, it's none of my concern after all._

"Ah, right." Kawasaki briefly responded before going silence.

"Ah Kawasaki-san, sorry to kept you waiting." Totsuka made his way to Kawasaki from behind my direction.

"It's no big deal." Kawasaki made a blank look as she replied him.

Totsuka smiled at her then he shifted his gaze from Kawasaki to me.

"Hachiman, so are you going for the group study today?" Totsuka asked me.

"I think I'll pass this one." I rejected him because I know that person will be there again. I don't want to have anything to do with her.

When I answered him, both Kawasaki and Totsuka made a concerned look at my direction. Totsuka forced himself to smile.

"Ah I see then. Well see you tomorrow." After he said that, he and Kawasaki took their leave from the classroom and I was left once more with peace and quiet.

The classroom submerged in a relaxing atmosphere, the people who were still in the classroom was busy chattering in their groups quietly, some do their group study in the class. The sun was still shining and the birds outside were singing on the trees. I began yawning due to this relaxing sensation.

 _Maybe I should take a nap….just until Komachi finishes her club activity._

And so I folded my arms, overlapped it on the table and rested my head on it. It was comfy; I began dozing off, slowly closed my eyes and quickly fell asleep on the spot.

* * *

She was beautiful.

Majestic.

Like nothing I've ever seen before.

She was perfect. Too perfect,

That I had suspicion that it was,

Too good to be true.

But like every other being,

She was just another lie.

I slowly opened my eyes and woke up. The room was empty, not a sight of any living creature in it.

I lifted my head from the table after waking up and made a sit posture on my seat. The classroom was illuminated in a reddish orange color, coming from the light of the setting sun. I checked the time on the clock that was located above the black board and still another 25 minutes until school and all club activities comes to a close.

I grabbed my school bag, and exited the empty classroom. I'm planning on waiting for Komachi at my usual spot outside of the school's special building where I usually eat my lunch, she'll know I'll be there by instinct so I decided to follow her instinct and just wait there.

The only route I know was the hallway that leads to the school's special building, the same hallway where I usually used to head my way to the clubroom of the service club back then.

I started walking the hallway that led to the school's special building which felt very nostalgic as if I haven't walked here in ages. The last time I did, was when I chased after Yukinoshita.

After walking for a while now, by instinct, I immediately stopped in front of what used to be the clubroom of the service club but now it's nothing but a storage room for extra tables and chairs. It makes sense though, I mean it was a storage room to begin with before people come and go making requests to the service club.

Each of their requests was like a lesson in life and reality from my point of view, when I was in the service club I understand a lot more about youth, people, friendship and so on. It was a club, unexpectedly suited for me.

I took a step back from the door, and started walking away from it to head to the stairs. I don't intend on being too attached to things that's already gone. I slowly walked downstairs, and continued on to the front entrance to change into my outdoor shoes.

I exited the entrance and passed by the bike park avenue and continued on walking my way to my meeting point with Komachi. As I turned to the corner outside of the special building, my gaze met with the sight of the soccer club still practicing, even the tennis club as well but of course Totsuka wasn't there because he's in the middle of a group study with the others.

As I walked, I gazed at the soccer club area once more but then I noticed, someone who stood out from the soccer club was there, with a long raven hair, sitting on the bench, reading her book. It was Yukino Yukinoshita _._ Well only her back view.

 _I thought she was supposed to be tutoring Totsuka and his study group._

If I'd known that she didn't come, I wouldn't have rejected Totsuka and probably be in the study group right now. But looking at the time right now, it's too late for that.

 _Sorry Totsuka…_

Still, changed of plans. If I waited around here and Yukinoshita saw me, things might get a bit awkward even Hayama as well, if he saw me he would try talking to me again just like earlier in the morning, but talking to him won't do any good for both of us, because of my recent activity with my body.

So I stopped and started walking back while nobody notice me, and decided to wait Komachi at the bike park venue. The few talents I have as a loner, was camouflage. Even with many people around here, they wouldn't noticed me, unaware of my existence, but I can't say the same for Hayama and Yukinoshita because they're already aware of my existence.

"See you tomorrow Hikitani-kun!" I froze and startled by Tobe. _Damn it Tobe so noisy!_

I gazed at Tobe giving him an irritated look,but he looked away before I did.

Both Yukinoshita and Hayama heard Tobe and reflexively turned around and saw me. _Crap, I'm caught!_

I ignored their stares, and just continued on walking to my bike. Suddenly, I heard steps coming quickly towards me from behind. I knew who it was, the moment I was caught in sight.

"Hikigaya." I didn't turn around to see who it was because I knew that voice belongs to none other than Hayato Hayama.

"What? Didn't I say we have nothing to say to each other?" I said, while my gazed was still in front, I didn't have to turn around to hear what he has to say.

"But it's important…"

Silence came over me. My eyes ignored his sight but my ear continued listening to him.

"What Yukino said to you.."

Once I heard Hayama refer Yukinoshita by her first name, a certain emotion slowly forming inside of me. It was a small burning sensation. I was familiar with it. It's anger. I further suppressed the emotion from taking over my body and mind once again.

I continued on my self-restrain. I immediately tried to walked away to keep myself from rupturing but was stopped when Hayama had taken hold of my wrist.

"Hikigaya. She didn't mean it.." Hayama continued speaking.

Words after words from him, only reminded me back to that day. The day Yukinoshita revealed her true self, her love with Hayama, both of them holding hands. My anger grew more the further I think about it. _Just suppress it… suppress it_

"Shut up…" I mumbled with my voice was trembling and my teeth grinded.

"I wanted to be honest with you, but there are things I'm not allowed to tell you for her sake."

"I said shut up…" I said once more but he didn't listen.

My whole body began trembling and my hand that was left free from Hayama's grasp clenched itself. I tried to suppress myself as much as possible from lashing out. I gulped the saliva that's forming in my mouth; I could feel my body temperature rising, my heart pounding faster, my blood slowly boiling.

"If there's anything honest I want to say...is that...I was always...in love with Yukino to begin with."

Before I realized it, it was already too late. Once I heard that, I lost myself once again. It was like I was sleep-walking; it's when a body acted on its own while the mind was asleep. But in my case right now, my body acted out of anger, and when I woke up, I saw my fist that was clenched, threw itself and landed on Hayama's face. In short, I punched Hayato Hayama.

My punch threw him off from where he stood and fell on the ground with a slight bruise on his right face. His eyes widened and mouth hanging opened as he was shocked; I was just as shocked as he was. My fist that punched him began trembling; I couldn't stop it from trembling even if I tried to. It was the first time I punched someone after all.

"Hikki!" Yuigahama shouted from the front entrance as she witnessed the scenario along with Ebina and Miura as well. All three of them were surprised and speechless.

There were also murmurings coming from both the soccer and tennis club as they witnessed what happened just now.

"Hikitani-kun! What are you doing!?" Tobe yelled and quickly ran towards me and immediately restrain both my arms with his, further suppressing me. I was dazed and all I did was stared at Hayama's shocking expression.

"Yukinon?" Yuigahama briefly mentioned her name, I lifted my gazed from Hayama and saw Yukinoshita quickly walking towards me with a cold piercing glare.

She stopped walking as she stood in front of me.

Suddenly, she slapped my face.

Yuigahama gasped by Yukinoshita's slapped upon my face.

Even though it's not hard enough to hurt me, still something else inside of me was hurt pretty badly, the same unbearable pain returned to my chest, constricting it.

 _It hurts…_

The anger that came over earlier was replaced by guilt and the unbearable pain around my chest.

My vision begins to blur, I could feel myself passing out at any moment. My body was still trembling, especially my legs. If it weren't for Tobe restraining me by holding both my arms, I would've dropped to the ground at this instant.

Yukinoshita then walked slowly to Hayama, and kneeled down to him holding his shoulder. Hayama was still staring at me like he was paralyze out of shock, while Yukinoshita stared at me with a cold disgusted look.

My expression became sour I could feel myself about to break down into tears but I suppressed it and swallowed the bitter feelings attempted to escape from me, lowered my head to prevent others from seeing my expression, and my face was covered by my hair. I dropped my gaze to the ground, feeling nothing but guilt and an excruciating pain.

"Hikki…"

 _I thought all my feelings for her was discarded; if so then why do I feel this way?_

I punched Hayama, yet something also punched me on the chest,

Leaving a hole on it..

Forever in pain..

With no idea, how to close it….

* * *

 **Next Chapter 3: Surely even Ms. Hikigaya cares about her son.**


	4. Surely even Ms Hikigaya cares about

**ANNOUNCEMENT** **: I'll update the latest chapter every Saturday from now on.**

* * *

 **Here you go guys, sorry for taking so long. Sorry in advance for any error and Please leave a review :D**

* * *

 **Chapter 3: Surely even Ms. Hikigaya cares about her son**

* * *

After a few minutes had passed after the incident occurred in the following afternoon, witnesses from the soccer club immediately reported of what happened to a nearby teacher who was still at school and of course I was called to the head principal's office straightaway for the cause of the incident.

I was still in daze when I entered the principal's office; my eyes were cast down the entire time. I only glanced at the principal only when asked by him and I answered a yes or a no to his question regarding about what happened, which was mostly about why I punched Hayama in the face.

When he did asked me that specific question I dropped my gaze to the floor and fell silence, not knowing how to answer it logically until a certain individual arrived to the principal's office for my concern, and took my place to further resolving my issue at hand, even though that individual did know what really happened, but she knows how to negotiate things better than I do.

So I was asked to wait outside of the office, until the discussion of the two individual adults behind the closed door of the office was finished. I could only hear murmurings, faint voice behind the closed door, unable to hear clearly of what they're discussing about. Of course, they may discuss on how to take responsibility of my wrong doing. The principal was a very responsible, strict man, so it made sense he won't let my action go unpunished.

I leaned myself against the wall outside next to his office door, lightly gritted my teeth while my hand was still clutching itself onto my hand that punched Hayama. While waiting, I kept asking myself regarding about my action towards Hayama this afternoon, speculating it in my head but to no answer on any logical result, as far as illogical was concerned I don't really know much about, was it because of the fact that he was always in love with Yukinoshita since the very beginning? If so, then why did punched him?

I shouldn't be making any kind response about her, after what Yukinoshita did to me, Should I not hate her? There was hesitation whether I should hate her or not, even if I tried to hate her, there was something within inside of me keeps holding me back from feeling that way towards her, but nevertheless I know that I should hate her, if so, why can't I immediately proceed myself to that?

Suddenly light steps slowly coming towards the office at my direction.

"Really Hikigaya…"

It was Hiratsuka-sensei, as she chided me with a gentle kind tone behind her voice.

I didn't make any response to her rebuke, nor a glance.

She stopped and leaned against the wall next to me with her arms crossed.

"What happened Hikigaya?" Hiratsuka-sensei asked me, but obviously she knows what happened. So I let out a deep breath and answered her while my gazed was still on the floor.

"Obviously you heard from them, I punched Hayama." I answered her briefly, by them; I was referring to the students of Sobu High.

It was no surprised if the news reached almost to everyone who were still in the campus at such a short time, I did punched the school's idol, Hayato Hayama.

 _Now I'm even more hated than I was before, heh._

"I know that. What I meant was what happened to you?" Hiratsuka-sensei asked, sounded worried.

"What made you punch Hayama?" She asked another question after, while I remained silence.

Unable to answer her question, since I'm unable to answer mine as well. Hiratsuka-sensei let out a sigh before continuing to speak again.

"Fine, let me simplify it then. What did you feel before punching Hayama? Did you think about your intentions before that?" I glanced immediately at Hiratsuka-sensei who put up a gentle smile at my direction.

"I-I… I don't know. I felt anger then… all the sudden my mind went blank… and before I realized it, I saw my fist…on his face." I briefly answered her to which she nodded in response.

"I see, so you acted without thinking I presume?"

"I guess you could say that." I answered Hiratsuka-sensei, and then I looked away and dropped my gaze back to the floor. Then again, why did I?

"Hikigaya…"

"…There's nothing to be ashamed of acting out of your emotions." said Hiratsuka-sensei

"What are you saying?" I glanced at her. She closed her eyes and cleared her throat for a moment before answering me.

"You see, how do I put it…..usually the human body acted basely on what the mind is thinking, but remember, emotions, your feelings can be overwhelming to the point that it could cloud your judgement."

I silently listened to her as she continues on.

"If a certain emotion becomes stronger, it'll dominate the entire body and ignored what the mind is thinking. Hence, the body will instinctively act base on that strong emotion." Hiratsuka-sensei slowly breathes in and out before continued on.

"It's a typical human mistake, Hikigaya. People talk without thinking, people act without thinking, because there are times when the body ignores the mind, and acted on what their heart is feeling." Hiratsuka-sensei let out a deep breath after saying all that.

"If so, then it's annoying but still that doesn't answer my action." I said, sensei made a confused look.

"Sensei, you once told me; that my way of thinking was something that makes me special yet you also said sometimes I have to learn how to get into my feelings to understand the people around me. But then, it's also the reason why I'm here in the first place." I clenched my fist and gritted my teeth, as I briefly stated her that. _I feel so disgusted with myself…_

Because of that over these past few weeks, without realized I've slowly strayed myself from the path of logic to its opposite, emotions. I was called the monster of logic, but now I've been reduced to nothing more as the monster of emotion... _Quite the irony._

Hiratsuka-sensei closed her eyes once more, and tapped my shoulder once as she opened her mouth to respond to my statement.

"I can't deny that I did, but Hikigaya…Feelings are essential to all of us, even though they're troublesome at times but emotion, feelings; our heart gives us the drive, the will to break any boundaries, to take a step forward." I quickly raised my head and glance at her.

"But just because I told you to act by your heart sometimes doesn't mean you have to lose what makes you special… your way of thinking and seeing through things that other people couldn't, your mind, Hikigaya." I continued to stare at Hiratsuka-sensei while listened to what she has to say.

"Both are important and necessary. Without the heart, we have no will to do our actions. Without the mind, we'll just be a loose cannon, kinda like you right now." Hiratsuka-sensei made a small laugh before continuing again.

"It's a matter of balancing it, Hikigaya. Let your mind guide you on what is right and let your heart drive you to have the will to take action."

"Even if we're wrong at first, there's no doubt that we'll eventually get it right, don't you think?" Hiratsuka-sensei slowly laid her right palm squarely on my left cheek. I made a brief look of surprised for a moment.

"Easier said than done." I briefly said to her. Hiratsuka-sensei broke into laughter immediately.

"True, you can say that again. Nothing was ever simple." Hiratsuka-sensei slowly inhales and exhales after laughing before she continues.

"But there's always a reason to it, Hikigaya. Especially when it comes to someone who you have strong feelings for." After Hiratsuka-sensei briefly stated that, I was surprised for a moment by that statement. Hiratsuka-sensei made a small smile, shifted her hand from my cheek and onto my head, rubbing my hair, messing it up a bit.

 _Someone who you have strong feelings for…huh?_

"I may not be your sensei this year Hikigaya, but I will always be your sensei and a friend." A wide grin formed across Hiratsuka-sensei's face. I felt at ease, and I managed to make a small smile at her direction. She's really amazing, the best I must say.

"Thank you, sensei." Her advice never fails to help me ease things at times like this. She had a way to simplify any complications in every occasion. Even when I don't need it, Hiratsuka-sensei knows her way around to get into me. For that, I'm a lucky man to have Hiratsuka-sensei in my life.

* * *

Suddenly, the office door next to me finally opened. It seems those two finished discussing the matter at hand.

"Thank you, and sorry for causing you so much trouble!" A certain woman emerges out from the principal's office. It was my mom, Ms. Hikigaya.

She closed the door in front her, letting out a deep breath with her hand still held onto the doorknob.

"You done?" I briefly asked my mom. She shifted her gazed from the door to my direction.

"Do you have any idea what you've done?" Even though she was smiling when she asked that, there was something cold about it especially her eyes behind her specs, the lens of her glasses were clouded. _Scary…_

"I know, I know. Sorry." I apologized to her out of instinct.

"Ah! You must be his mother." Hiratsuka-sensei exclaimed, she took a step forward to my mom and lifted her hand up for a handshake from my mom.

"I'm Shizuka Hiratsuka!" Sensei introduced herself energetically.

"Ahh, a friend?" My mom assumed, and shook Hiratsuka-sensei's hand.

"Well more or less but I was his teacher in his second year, now I'm just a counselor." Hiratsuka-sensei briefly explained her relationship with me. My mom looked a bit surprised then inspects Hiratsuka-sensei, from head to toe.

"Oh, I thought for sure you're a student, since you look….young. Hiratsuka-san then." My mom made a dry laugh while both their hand still clinging onto each other.

"Young?" Hiratsuka-sensei muttered and looked pleased as she laughed out of embarrassment by that one word alone.

"Don't give her that, mom. Sensei here is much older than she looks…" I said. Once I said that, Hiratsuka-sensei turned her body around and gave me a piercing glare with her fist raised at my direction.

I flinched immediately of her reaction to my statement, _uh ohh… crap.._

"Anyway, is your son's issue been resolved?" Hiratsuka-sensei asked out of concern.

When she did, my mom let out a sigh.

"Well, that's…there's good news and bad news." My mom said, _ohh you're going with that method? How typical. Fine I'll bite._

"What's the bad news?" I asked, and was ready for what's coming.

"The bad news is, you're given a week of suspension from school, starting tomorrow." My mom stated the bad news.

"Huh!?" Hiratsuka-sensei was surprised. _It's not really a bad thing though…._

"I tried to negotiate for another way to resolve the issue but the principal was being rather cautious to prevent anything like this from ever happening again." My mom explained the situation that was discussed in the office.

Hiratsuka-sensei closed her eyes and nodded like she understood where the principal was coming from.

"Well I guess…. I mean nothing like this ever happened in school before. There's practically no delinquent present in the school… until now." Hiratsuka-sensei glared at me after stating that. _Huh? Do I even looked like one? It was an accident…. Well that's what I think…_

"Okay then. What's the good news?" I hardly believe there's even a good news out of all this.

My mom immediately put up a smile and adjusted her specs with the tip of her finger.

"The good news is….."

"…..I've manage to convince the principal to reduce your suspension down to five days only." My mom let out a small laugh while Hiratsuka-sensei made a wryly laugh.

"…That's still practically the same…." I muttered.

All the sudden all three of us heard steps running toward where we were,

"Hikki!"

"Onii-chan!"

It was Yuigahama and my sister, Komachi running through the hallway heading towards us. It seems they haven't gone home yet…moreover those two sure were reckless; I mean the principal was still in his office. What if he heard you guys running outside his office?

They immediately stopped their tracks in front of us looking out of breath as they panted.

"Onii-chan, I heard what happened. Are you okay? And more importantly…" Komachi immediately slapped me on the head.

"Ouch!"

"Are you out of your mind!? What were you thinking punching him at broad daylight!?" Komachi shouted at me, obviously she was concerned about my well-being.

 _Umm the way you say it Komachi…. It seems you are more okay if I punched him without anyone around. You should really pick your words more carefully…._

"Hikki… umm.." Yuigahama looked worried, as she was about to say something but didn't continue on.

"I'm fine. It's nothing to worry about." I said. Yuigahama let out a sigh of relief, and immediately put up a small smile indicating that she was glad.

"Ah Komachi."

"Mom? You're here?" Komachi asked looking a bit confused.

"Well of course. When my son got himself into trouble, who do you think they called anyway?" My mom chuckled and smiled.

Yuigahama took a step forward to my mom and slightly bowed her head to my mom before lifting it up again as she spoke,

"H-Hello, I'm Yui Yuigahama! Nice to meet you…" Yuigahama was stammering as she introduced herself to my mom, it seems she's embarrassed somehow. _It's just my mom, Yuigahama. Not some snake._

"Ohh Yui is it? Ahh I heard my son talks a lot about you." _Wait what!?_

Yuigahama's face instantly flushed red out of embarrassment. _Since when did I…_ I gazed immediately at Komachi who was grinning. _Oh of course, that makes sense…_

Then suddenly something pops into my mind, I remembered there was something I need to do even though I didn't want to but I had to since I felt bad for my action towards him.

"Umm excuse me, I'll be taking my leave." I announced to all four of them that was present around me.

"Huh where you going onii-chan?" Komachi asked curiously. While Yuigahama had a concerned look on her facial expression.

"There's something I need to do." I briefly answered her that only, not revealing my intention.

"Sure, go ahead." Hiratsuka-sensei smiled and winked at me. As usual, she realized what I'm going to do next. That was to apologize Hayama.

"Alright then, we'll be waiting outside." My mom informed me and I nodded as I turned and started walking away from them and head to where I think Hayama would be right now.

* * *

It hasn't been too long after the incident so he should still be around the school somewhere. He's probably getting his injury treated right now in the infirmary by the nurse that's still present at the campus this late. So I decided to check over the infirmary first to see if he's there or not.

When I approached near the infirmary, due to the sun's direction, there were slight shadows moving underneath the door indicating there were presences in the infirmary. I walked to the door to knock it before entering, but I was immediately frozen by the scene I saw through the small window of the infirmary door.

It was Yukino Yukinoshita sitting on a chair in front of a seated Hayama, dabbed the bruise on his left cheek with a piece of cotton. Suddenly, the events that took place in the same room as well during the marathon flashed in my head. I slowly pulled my hand away from the door, shutting my eyes closed and turned my head away from them. I felt like I swallowed something bitter, my throat felt tighter as if something was choking me.

"Hikki?" I reflexively turned around and it seems Yuigahama had been followed me behind. She made a worried look across me.

"It's getting late….come on… I'll walk you home." I said briefly, ignored what happened. I placed my hands in my pockets and started walking to the stairs.

"Mm.." Yuigahama nodded in response and quickly chased beside me.

We continued descending the stairs to the front entrance, changed to our outdoor shoes and head outside the school building.

Waiting outside of the entrance was both my mom and Komachi.

"Hey uh..I'll walk Yuigahama home..If that's okay?" I asked permission directly from both of them.

"Sure. No problem." My mom approved of it.

"Ah, okay. I'll follow mom home then." Komachi responded with her usual loud energetic voice.

"Thanks, I'll go get my bike first." I informed to Yuigahama to which she nodded in response.

"We'll see you home then." My mom spoke, as both she and Komachi exited from the main gate.

After I retrieved my bike and exited the campus, I followed Yuigahama from behind as I walked her home and pushed my bike along as well. We were both in a complete silence as we walked the streets under the sky that was a mixture of the evening twilight and darkness of night. Couldn't keep the silence going, I opened my mouth and spoke,

"Umm, I won't be attending school for a while…" I spoke briefly at her back. She slowed her pace after she heard that and I caught up walking beside her.

"Huh? Why?" Yuigahama looked at my direction and tilted her head.

"I'm suspended from school…" I looked away from her as I answered her, a bit of embarrassment and ashamed of myself.

"Eh!?" Yuigahama was just as surprised as Hirastsuka-sensei was earlier.

"What? You think they're just going to let me off that easily after punching someone?" I asked sarcastically, trying to helped Yuigahama understand the situation.

"Well that's true I guess." Yuigahama let out a wryly laugh indicating she was a bit embarrassed, well of course the situation was quite obvious and Yuigahama was pretty much dense in figuring out the most obvious things like these.

"How long?" Yuigahama asked the duration of my suspension.

"5 days." I answered. She averted her gaze from me and dropped it to the ground she was walking on.

After a few short silences, Yuigahama quickly lifted her head and gazed at me once more.

"Hikki…. Why did-….never mind." Yuigahama dropped her gaze as soon as she was about to asked something. It seems like she was about to ask why I punched Hayama, but hesitated and didn't continue on.

She was being considerate, I was grateful for that. But even if I considered answering her, I still don't have an answer yet for my actions earlier or more likely, the answer was not explainable through words.

"Ah.. I'll be fine from here. See you later!"

"Yeah..sure."

Yuigahama made a small wave of her hand before leaving me alone in the streets under the setting sun as she walked on her way home. I instinctively replied her wave with mine as well, even though she was far ahead from me already.

I pushed my bike along to the original street; I got onto my bike and started pedaling my way home. After a few short cycles my stomach rumbled loudly, I realized that I was empty after it made that noise, indicating that I was..

Hungry.

* * *

And so

I switched the direction of where I was pedaling my bike to and cycled my way down the highway to the center of the city.

I texted my mom to inform her that I was going to stopped somewhere to fill my emptied stomach. The city was lively even at this evening, as expected, due to the season this month. Everyone was in high spirit for spring. I stopped pedaling in near the traffic light and waited til it was green to go to cross the streets.

I was planning to head to Starbucks but seeing that the city was still crowded at this time and the popularity of the café, it would be crowded and I don't take well in a crowded area. I preferred to enjoy my alone time peace and quiet, so I headed to the donut shop diagonally opposite of the movie theater to have my supper there. As I entered the donut shop, a nostalgic feeling came across me. The last I came here was during the events of the student council election then I also bumped into Haruno Yukinoshita as well in this place.

It's been a month already, and I hadn't seen Haruno since last month when she came by to my place. I wondered how she was nowadays. I quickly ignored the thought of her and ordered the same set as the last time I came here which was the old fashioned French culler and a café au lait at the counter.

The good thing about this place compared to Starbucks was,

Less popularity means fewer customers.

Fewer customers mean more seats that came along with an enjoyment of peace and quiet.

After getting my order from the counter I took a seat near the wide transparent glass window, I opened my novel to enjoy reading it while sipping through the coffee and my café au lait. The shop was submerged in a relaxing atmosphere.

After what I went through for the past few days including today, all of them involved one person, Yukino Yukinoshita. Even though I declared myself that I didn't want anything to do with her yet still, I somehow keep getting myself involved in her little world. I tried to stay away from her as much as possible but I ended up bumping into her every time in every occasion. Was this fate? It can't be a coincidence though…

I shook my head of the thought of it and enjoyed this nice atmosphere of the shop. I deserved this kind of relaxing moment. The shop was empty, and the only presence inside it was me and a few employees.

I made a small smile while flipping through the pages of my novel slowly forgetting what I thought earlier, then all the sudden; a few knocks reached my ears coming from the glass window beside my seat. I reflexively shifted my gaze from my novel and looked to the source of that knock coming from the other side of the glass.

The person who knocked the glass gently outside was my middle school crush with a perm short bob hairstyle, and was dressed in the uniform of Kaihin Sogo High. She was none other than Kaori Orimoto.

She waved her hand along with a cheery smile on her face. I didn't react at all but stared at her blankly as she made her way around the shop and entered the donut shop. Once she's inside, she waved once more at my direction from the door she just entered.

"Sup Hikigaya!" I startled as she called me out loudly across the room.

So much for peace and quiet…

Once she made her order at the counter, she carried her tray of coffee along with one croissant bread and took her seat in front of me across the coffee table between us.

"Ha I expected to see you here Hikigaya." Orimoto said briefly while sipping her drink.

"This is the second time I'm here you know." I said, closing my novel and rested my chin on my left hand while gazing at the city through the window.

"Really? I thought for sure this was your favorite spot to chill." Orimoto made a blank looked over my direction.

"I would refer to it as enjoying my loneliness." After I said that, Orimoto burst into laughter for a brief moment.

"Loneliness, pfft. Hilarious!"

I made a small irritated look while staring at the scenery outside. _How is that even funny? Orimoto, you are one odd creature to interact with._

"Time to dig in!" Orimoto declared, and she began munching her bread quietly.

We didn't speak anything further as we were both engaged with our respective activity; she was eating while I stared at the scenery of the city that was slowly engulfed by the darkness of the night. The street lamps, lights and neon as such from the city brighten the scene from the darkness, illuminating the night sky.

People outside were walking, crossing the streets.

Chattered and smiled to their respective companions and lover.

I took a peek glance at Orimoto with my eyes alone; she was still eating and drinking while fiddling with her phone. I shifted my eyes away and onto my cup of coffee that went cold already.

The cold cup of coffee reminded me of a certain person I used to know.

The warmness of the coffee at first when it's served was for us to enjoy and drink while it lasts, before losing its warmness, exposing its true taste and original temperature as time passed by.

Just like my moments with that person…

* * *

We exited the donut shop after we both finished with our foods and drinks. It was getting late already yet the city was still lively.

"That sure hits the spot! Haaa…" Orimoto let out a sigh of relief and made a comfy smile as I gazed at her.

"Ah, I better get going. It's almost past curfew." Orimoto stated after she checked her watch. I let out a sigh and offered her,

"Want me to walk you to the station?"

"Huh?" Orimoto's expression went blank for a moment then she slowly made a sly smile.

"Ahh, are you making your move on me Hikigaya?" Orimoto giggled as she spoke.

 _Really now?_

The reason why I offered myself to walk her home was because it's getting late and dark, plus she's a young woman and her gender makes it unsafe for her to walk alone in this circumstances. Consider her appearance, who knows what's out there, and what creature she might attract. So better be safe than sorry, right?

"Not really, it's the least I could for you for keeping me company back there." I answered her differently from what I thought just then. If I did answer her honestly, she might look at me in a different way.

"Right right, that's how it is huh?" she chuckled. It seems she was still going with the idea of looking at my kind gesture as nothing but a flirtation. _I'm not those type….._

"Fine that's cool." Orimoto accepted my offer; I nodded in response as we departed from the shop and headed to the nearest station.

Orimoto was walking ahead while I followed her from behind and as usual, being a shadow that watches her from any danger lurking around the streets at this hour.

Chiba crime rate wasn't exactly high, or should I say Chiba was a peaceful place filled with peaceful people who doesn't commit any crime, still it doesn't hurt to be too cautious.

There's always a first at everything, I just hope a crime scene won't happen here right now. _That would be quite a misfortune if it did!_

Orimoto's pace became slower all the sudden and she started walking beside me. She quickly turned her gaze to me looking like she was about to say something and she did.

"Ah Hikigaya, what are you aiming for? I mean job." Orimoto asked, I was a bit surprised because of her sudden interest. I thought she wouldn't be interested with anything about me though.

"Well, It's…. I don't know" I answered her while we walked the streets, on our way to the station.

"Ah!? We're already third years, how could you not know?" Orimoto was a bit bewildered by my answer. Maybe because I already had an occupation to aim for, that was to be a full-time househusband! _Well it's a dream job anyway…._

"I haven't exactly thought of what I want to be anyway…" if I did answer her to be a full-time househusband, she would've laughed annoyingly.

"Ohhh…" Orimoto 's expression went blank immediately. It seems she gets where I'm coming from. _That's a first…._

 _"_ But which university are you planning to go to?" Orimoto asked once more a future related question.

I haven't exactly thought of it as well but I could answer her the conditions I prefer I would picked. I let out a sigh before running my mouth.

"As for university, as long as it's not too far from my house." I answered her, but she tilted her head in response to my answer.

"Why's that?" Orimoto asked for my reasons.

I inhaled as I was about to speak out the reasons.

"So when I have my driver license, fuel won't be wasted in a short time therefore money won't also be wasted and if there's a traffic jam I could always use my bike instead to go there rather than be stuck in traffic for a long period of time." I explained to her, Orimoto who's expression was blank immediately burst into laughter.

"You really are something Hikigaya!" Orimoto held her stomach as she continued laughing. I looked away, a bit irritated by her reaction.

"But don't take it the wrong way; I was actually complimenting you Hikigaya." She stopped laughing and made a wide grin on her face.

"Huh?" _Orimoto? Complimenting me? That's….._

"You sure are good at stuff like that, you know solving things… maybe you should.." Orimoto made a thinking posture with her hand holding her chin.

"Hmm...Ah!" After a brief moment of thinking, Orimoto suddenly snapped her fingers like she figured something out.

"You should become a detective or something, maybe a lawyer!" Orimoto exclaimed her statement.

I reacted surprisingly; the thought of these occupations never crossed my mind before. Still being one of those occupation had a high risk of danger.. Did she even watch detective conan? Even so..

"Hmm…I guess… I'll think about it…" I said, as I looked away from her and scratched my head out of embarrassment.

"Preach it!" Orimoto winked and made a thumb up at my direction.

The night was getting darker, there were people still roaming around the streets with their fellow companions. As we talked and walked, without realizing, we were already in front of the station.

We stopped, in front of the station to say our goodbyes to each other.

"I'll be fine here Hikigaya! Thanks!" Orimoto thanked with a big smiled on her face.

"Sure, it's no biggy."

"Who knew Hikigaya was such a gentleman, hee." She giggled as she stated that.

"See ya!" Orimoto slowly ran to the station while waving her hand at me. I made a slight wave of hand as well to her.

I watched as she walked to the station getting further and further til she's gone from my vision.

I let out a deep breath, and looked up to the sky, stared at the beautiful full moon above that illuminates its light below on the city.

I muttered myself to the moon,

"Lawyer, huh?"

 _Maybe I should consider that…._

* * *

It was already the following morning after last night.

After I walked Orimoto to the station, I went straight home and went straight to bed after I reached home. Dinner was not needed since I already had my supper at the donut shop.

I woke up on my bed currently due to my alarm buzzing every morning. The rays of sun shined my room through the window, and as usual the birds outside were chirping their song of spring.

I rose from my bed, yawned for a brief moment and stretched my arms. It was time to get ready for school…wait… right. I realized just then that I was suspended from school for five days starting today.

Why did I even fix my alarm last night before going to bed? Maybe it was out of instinct, even if I didn't I'm already used to waking up early every morning nowadays.

I might as well get up anyway, since I was already up. I stood from my bed and exited the room. I rubbed my eyes off as I walked downstairs, I could smell the scent of miso soup in the morning coming from the kitchen.

I heard murmurings, as I made it down; I saw both my mom and Komachi sitting at the dining table.

Both were dressed in their respective uniforms and were engaged in a conversation while eating their breakfast. I yawned once more before approaching them to greet them a good morning.

"Good morning."

"Ah onii-chan? good morning!"

"Morning Hachiman."

My mom and komachi responded to my greet, I looked around because there's one more person missing in the Hikigaya family, and no I'm not talking about Kamakura..

"Hey where's pops?" I asked

"Your father went to work already." My mom answered my question. Usually when pops goes to work, my mom goes with him as well at the same time. So I was a bit of surprised that she was still here without him. It was unexpected.

"Since you're up onii-chan, come sit and have breakfast." Komachi quickly served me a bowl of rice and I obediently took my seat beside her.

"Thank you for the food."

I began munching my rice with a side dish of dried salted fish along with a miso soup. The simple things always tasted the best. That's what I thought, I preferred this kind of breakfast over scramble eggs and toasted bread, I dislike those western style breakfast. _Rice is the best!_

"Oh, Hachiman?"

"Hm?" I stopped chewing for a moment as my mom called me.

"I'll be going home much early than usual as part of your suspension." My mom briefly stated.

"Oh? There's no need to trouble yourself mom. If it's work then work, I don't mind." I responded her statement.

"I suppose, but parental guidance was also part of the term of your suspension as well."

"Which is why it's an efficient reason enough that I was approved from my superior to leave work early, still even so…" my mom chewed the food in her mouth and swallowed it before continued on from where she stopped.

"Nothing would please me more than spending my time with my beloved son." My mom chuckled and made a girly smile at me as if she's still at her teens. Komachi made a disgusted look at mom, while I did nothing but stared at her; I felt a fluffy sensation started tingling in me.

I have to admit it _… my mom is cuteee!_

 _Wait what am I thinking!? Get a hold of yourself Hachiman….despite how she looks let's not forget her age; remember that she's still a grown woman._

 _People already looked at me as a siscon, but a momcon? That's even worse!_

"Anyway onii-chan.." Komachi interrupted my thought and put me back into my senses.

"Since you won't be going to school for the next five days, what are you planning on doing?" Komachi asked me with a concerned expression.

"Hibernate maybe?" I answered instantly.

Komachi stared at me reluctantly with her eyes narrowed at me looking a bit annoyed by my answer.

"Onii-chan.. you're not a grizzly bear hibernating during winter…" Komachi corrected me, well that's true, at one point I did want to become a grizzly bear but that was a long time ago.

"True, now that I'm stuck in here..I might as well become some sort of househus-…band…"

"Huh?" Komachi once more made a disgusted look at my direction while I was distracted by something else in my thought.

As soon as I spoke that by accident, I felt my brain was plugged in and I realized that my suspension was a good chance for me in living my dream as a full-time househusband!

 _Well part-time for now…. Still this is a dream come true! I'm glad that I'm suspended! Thank you principal of Sobu high!_

By instinct, I lifted my head from my food looking determined to begin my dream.

"Househusband?" My mom wondered and stared at Komachi for an explanation.

"Well you see mom, onii-chan had always dream of becoming a househusband one day. I know, it's weird but just let onii-chan have his moment." Komachi spoke disinterested and continued eating.

We all fell silence for a brief moment, the only sound that was heard was the munching of food from Komachi's mouth but then the silence was broken..

"Ha-chi-man…" I reflexively looked over to my mom who called me, as she pulled her specs off her face and smiled at me. When she did, I flinched and quickly froze.

There was no warmth behind that smile. There was only coldness as cold as the thick ice of the North Pole and her eyes became as transparent as her glasses. I could feel the temperature of the room went down rapidly or was it just me..

"Y-Yes?" I stammered and silently listened to what she was about to say.

"There's no way my son would ever dream to be a useless man who would do nothing but sit on his couch and click the Tv remote as an activity, would he?" My mom continued smiling as she spoke, her voice was cold and sharp, it was piercing through me. I felt shivers running down my spine because of it.

"Well…I-" I tried to look away, but my eyes were automatically stuck on hers.

"It's hard to believe my son studied so hard just to be a mere househusband, right?" Her tone grew sharper and colder from her smiling lips.

"I..." I continued to choke on my words, hesitated on how should I answered her.

"Say it isn't so… Hachiman." She continued her offense at me. It was too much, too scary!

"I-It… i-isn't s-so…" I had no choice but to admit defeat. Truly, a mother was one of the scariest creatures not to be trifle with on earth.

Komachi didn't pay any attention to our conversation at all; as she was too busy finishing her breakfast.

"Good that's what I thought." My mom smiled as she puts back her specs on her and adjusted it with the tip of her finger as she finished breakfast and began gulping her glass of water.

While I was still in a state of paralysis. With that, all I could describe about my mother was, she's like a Medusa and as you stared at her in the eyes you will instantly become a hard cold stone.

It was both terrifying and hypnotizing.

The only thing that masked her fearsome apocalyptic eyes was her glasses.

"Thanks for the meal. Let's go Komachi."

"Mm!"

As my mom and Komachi finished their breakfast, they stood from their seat and were about to head to work and school. I woke up quickly from my paralysis and withdrew back to my senses once they were about to leave the house.

"Have a safe trip you two." I said to the both of them.

"Behave yourself Hachiman."

"See you later onii-chan!"

Both of them took their leave from the dining table, and exited the house along with their respective handbag. Given the circumstances now, it seems Komachi will be following mom to school by car for the next few days. That's good to hear.

It'll be so unlady like of her to be taking my bike to school if she did. I wanted my sister to be popular among the boys yet at the same time I don't want her to have a boyfriend. I founded myself grinning just by the thought of it. That settle's it from now on,

 _I won't let anyone have my Komachi!_

Since I won't be going to school for a while, I already had my schedule planned for the next five days.

Eat.

Sleep.

Repeat.

That's right; I'm looking forward to it. Or so I thought after my mom's expression flashed in my head. _Scary…._

Guess since I'm here I might as well do the dishes and stuff, even cleaning the laundry along with the house. Wow, I never realized being a househusband had so much work to do and quite bothersome. Maybe I should've think twice before even dreaming of become a househusband.

 _Living the dream huh? How crappy…_

Once I finished breakfast, I washed my plates and glass at the kitchen's sink along with mom's and Komachi's. After I did, I let the plates dried itself on the rack for a while, and I headed upstairs to take a bath.

I entered the bathroom, and filled the bathtub with medium temperature of hot water. Once the bathtub was filled, I unclothed myself and slowly entered the bathtub. It was hot, but it's bearable. I settled myself with my whole body in the hot water of the bathtub. I let out a sigh of relief.

 _Ah, this feels good…_

I haven't been myself for these past few days, ever since Yukinoshita came to the group study. It was the first time I met her since last month. Now I'm suspended because of my act towards her Hayama. Was it perhaps because he brought up about Yukinoshita?

 _Wait, why would I be?_

But still, I can't deny what my feelings were. All Hayama did was being honest with me, but instead I looked at it as a provocation for some unknown reason.

Could it be that I was I jealous of the fact that Hayama won Yukinoshita over me? My feelings of hatred for Hayama slowly became a feeling of jealous, and that emotion grew and turned into anger which caused me to burst out towards him with a punch without even realizing it.

Just how much did I degrade?

Maybe I should see my suspension as a good opportunity to rehabilitate myself for the next few days away from school, and away from her. I let out a deep breath after having deep thoughts about it. Even though it's not physical, I felt my whole body exhausted just by thinking of it.

After a few minutes had passed, I got up from the bathtub and unplugged the cork to let the hot water sink in the hole. I dried myself then brushed my teeth. Once that's done, I went straight to my room to put on my house clothes.

I was feeling exhausted, I thought for sure taking a bath would relieved me from the tiredness yet, I felt drowsy.

I yawned in instinct.

I decided to take a short nap on my bed to satisfy myself off the exhaustion. My eyes slowly closed itself, and soon I entered into deep slumber…

* * *

"Hikkiiiiii!"

"Hey Hikkiiiii!"

"Wh-What…." I mumbled while I was still half asleep. I thought for sure someone was calling me. I guess I was dreaming.

"Hikkiiii!" I guess not, it sounded like Yuigahama's voice. I opened my eyes and wondered.

Why's she here? Doesn't she have school? I checked the time on my phone just to be sure.

It was 2 O'clock. It's already passed homeroom, the school was currently having their club activities around this time, but since Yuigahama didn't have any club to attend to, she was free to do whatever she wants.

I guess I slept well.

Murmurings can be heard coming from outside through the window, was she with someone?

"Hikki!" she called me out loudly once more. I stood from my bed and walked to the window to check up on her.

I unlocked the window and saw Yuigahama standing outside the front door with… Miura!?

 _What the hell? Why is she tagging along?_

Yuigahama noticed me from above immediately made her usual energetic smile and waved both her hands at me while Miura looked like she was glaring at me, putting on her usual fierce expression.

 _That doesn't look good…_

Still I had to welcome my guests.

I walked towards the door and exited my room to proceed downstairs. Once I'm there I walked to the doorway and unlocked my front door.

"Yo." I opened the door and greet the two who was still in their school uniforms.

"Yahallo!" Yuigahama replied my greet me while Miura didn't say anything at all but stared at me fiercely.

"So uh, what are you guys doing here?" I asked a bit reluctant for an answer.

"Well..umm you see-"

"You just gonna let us stand outside or are you gonna let us in?"

Just as Yuigahama was about to answer me, with no restraint Miura interrupted her, as expected of Yumiko Miura.

"Talk about rude." Miura muttered to herself.

 _Rude? Heh, that's kinda funny coming from a lady who just shouted to the guy who just opened his door to…_

Even so, I hate to admit it. She's right.

"Oh where are my manners? Please come in." I said sarcastically.

"Watch your tone." Miura glared coldly at me before entering the house. I was twitch for a moment..

Yuigahama let out forced laugh, and rubbed the bun of her hair with her right hand.

"Hehe.. sorry about that, I thought it looked like Yumiko was in a good mood this morning." Yuigahama stated and went inside after.

 _Good mood huh? So you're saying I spoiled it? Of course I did… when did I never?_

* * *

 **Next Chapter 4: Under the cherry blossoms, Yui Yuigahama speaks out her feelings.**

 **Next chapter will also include a short memorandum in the first part.**


	5. Under the cherry blossoms, Yui Yuigahama

**Sorry for the wait, I was in an unexpected holiday plus I had to lay off from the laptop for a while to spend some time with my nagging here's the new chapter over 13k words, so please do take your time in reading it and try understanding it despite the error. lol**

 **Here you go, sorry in advance for any error. Do leave a review!**

* * *

 **Chapter 4: Under the cherry blossoms, Yui Yuigahama speaks out her feelings.**

* * *

 _He was a nobody._

 _A complete stranger._

 _An existence I didn't bother to acknowledge just like everyone else did._

 _But after witnessed his action._

 _The moment when he jump and took a speeding bullet to save what's precious to me…_

 _I started acknowledging his existence by his action,_

 _His bravery._

 _In my life, all I ever wanted was to get along with the people around me, that's why I've been nothing like a dog, obedient, silent and waited for master's command._

 _I always did everything for the sake of maintaining such relationship even though it wasn't real yet it was all I have._

 _But this boy, he was different. He acted, and risks even his life for me, a complete stranger to him. Nobody has ever done something this for me._

 _I was forever in debt by his doing; I immediately had an urge of wanting to know more about him._

 _Wanted to sought something real,_

 _One day, I was told a certain club could help me with any request, even my debt to him._

 _And so I decided to go there.._

 _Without knowing, I opened the door and…_

 _He was there in the clubroom as a club member…_

 _Right in front of me._

 _I was shocked for a brief moment because it was entirely unbelievable._

 _The only thing I thought in my mind that time was.._

" _Is this fate?"_

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

"Oi you sure you know what you're doing?" I shouted at Yuigahama who was currently at the kitchen.

After she and Miura unexpectedly visited the Hikigaya Household, Yuigahama offered to make some tea and told me and Miura to wait in the living room. I hesitated for a moment whether to allow her to make some, but Miura instantly answered a yes for the both of us.

 _How dominant…_

"Of course Hikki!" Yuigahama answered me and looked like she was rummaging through the cabinets and drawers of the kitchen.

"Back then I used to watch Yukinon preparing tea for us all the time, so this will be a piece of cake!" Yuigahama chuckled and resumed on her tea preparations.

 _Piece of cake huh….That's odd coming from someone who doesn't even know how to bake one… just hearing you say that gives off a bad vibe…_

I stared continuously at Yuigahama from the distant with a serious yet a bit reluctant expression from the single couch I'm seated on. While Miura laid her chin on her hand, resting it, on the ledge of the sofa.

I took a glance at her, she was looking rather serious. Miura as usual was fiddling with her hair that was curled on the tip end of it, and then she sensed my stare and glanced at me. She quickly puts on her usual fierce expression as our eyes met; I flinched by her glare then quickly averted my eyes away.

"What?" Miura asked as she seems to continued glaring at me.

"Nothing.." I briefly answered her.

Silence fell on us once more, along with a sense of awkwardness in the atmosphere.

I looked around to search for the television's remote, to distract myself from this uncomfortable atmosphere; but it was nowhere to be found.

"This what you're looking for?" Miura asked as she showed me the remote on her hand.

"Y-Yes…" I reluctantly replied her. _How convenient….._

"Hmm fine, but I'll pick what to watch." Miura instantly answered without giving any second thought or mercy at me. As usual… she's one of the few dominant girl in Sobu High aside from Yukinoshita.

Miura switched on the television and began clicking the remote, scrolling through the channels.

"Ah this will do." Miura said, as she stopped clicking the remote and started watching some American film.

I remain silent and obediently watched her pick. The movie was quite strange, it looked like it takes place at Italy base on the structure of the building but why was everyone dressed up in red gown? _I can never understand American's film_. As far as language was concern, there were subtitles on.

"Run, run, run come on." Miura muttered to the American actress on the movie who was running across the streets for some guy who began unbuttoning his shirt? _What the heck? In public what is this guy trying to prove anyway?_

"Hey uh can you- "

Just as I was about to asked her the reason, Miura quickly glared at me with eyes piercing through me.

"N-Never mind." It seems like Miura didn't want to be interrupted. Just how focus was she on this silly movie?

I continued watching, so as Miura. The guy slowly opened his shirt off, showing his exposed skin and his body was….shining? _Is that diamond? Is his body made of diamonds?_

I let out a deep breath of irritation because I couldn't really figure this film out. I took a glance at Miura and her face was all red as she stared at the topless guy on the movie. _Why is she even here in the first place?_

I looked away after, and glance at Yuigahama who was still in the kitchen. _What's taking her so long?_ If it was Yukinoshita, she'd be able to prepare it in seconds. At least she's trying, I appreciate her consideration but then again she could always ask for help, I wouldn't mind.

"Hey Hikio.." Miura called me, but wrong name!

"Hmm?" Out of instinct I responded over to that name, maybe because I'm already used to people such as her and Tobe calling me by those names. I looked over to her wondering what she's about to say.

"I.. uh.. thanks." Miura thanked me for some unknown reason. It's not everyday you get a thanks from Miura, I thought for a moment and couldn't figure out what I did for her gratitude.

"For?" I asked.

"….."

"well…."

"For…punching.. Hayama." Miura finally stated her reason.

"Huh?" I was taken aback by her answer, it's very odd to be thanking for punching Hayama. I mean that's seriously out of her, I thought for sure she never wanted to see Hayama hurt. Moreover, it seems like she addressed Hayato Hayama by his last name now. _Figures…_

"What do you mean "huh"?" Miura asked with a looked of irritation at my direction.

"N-Nothing, it's just, thought for sure you-"

"lovey dovey the guy? That's long gone." Miura saw me through and finished my sentence as she made her declaration.

"Why?" I asked for my curiosity.

"Huh? I thought for sure you could understand these kinds of things?" Miura ignored my question at hand, and stated her thought about me. _True, I would've understand, but these past few days… it's kinda hard for me think clearly._

I casted my eyes to the floor, Miura let out a deep sigh.

"Fine, it's the least I could do since you punched Hayama." Miura Let out a deep breath before explaining her reason while I remain silent and waited to hear her out.

"Last month, after the third years graduated.. I finally confessed to Hayama." _I pretty much know that already since I saw you running and crying away from him._

"But he said something, about him being with…..Yukinoshita. I was pretty much destroyed hearing that… like everything that I've done for him, he wants to be the girl who never did crap for him…. Just threw me away like I'm nothing, like I didn't do shit…"

 _the feelings mutual._

"Every part of me just wants to, punch him in the face.. but there's something holding me back yet it felt annoying that I couldn't do it." It seems like she's trying her best to be as calm as possible. It seems like I'm not the only one going through the same struggle.

"But after I saw you punch him, I felt… relieve. I mean, that something that's been itching me.. is gone. Like a weight has been lifted from me. I kinda enjoyed watching you throw him off to the ground." Miura smiled at me as she said that. She's truly one scary merciless young woman.

"So I guess it's all about letting it all out… I feel peachy now." Miura leaned back on the sofa and let out a sigh of relief. _Letting it out huh…_

Miura return her gazed at me, smiling and opened her mouth once more.

"And, I'm pretty sure you can relate to that, right?" Miura made a teasing smile.

I made a blank look as a response to her statement.

"Hm? Don't think I don't know about you and Yukinoshita." Miura briefly responded to my blank look and I was a bit surprised to how she knew that.

"How did you…"

"I mean, why else would you punch Hayama? I know you hate the guy but not to the point that you want to punch him unless…. It involves a certain special someone. I feel you on that one." Miura made a triumphant smile as she wiggled her index finger.

"Well… I suppose you could say that…" I looked away, a bit embarrassed to admit the reason.

"It seems we both have something in common now huh? We love someone, and then got backstab by that someone…" Miura briefly explained. I never thought I lived to hear Miura saying she has something common with a creature such as myself, but it's true.

We hope and love but crushed and hurt. The feeling of betrayal and pain bottled up inside, slowly poisoning us, made us lose sight of who we are. But now, it seems like Miura got over that since my punch to Hayama somehow opened the lid and free her. As for me… I don't know.. but one things for sure, the hint to my solution was Miura's words. _Letting it all out…. But how do I do that.._

"So yeah… thanks, Hikio." Miura thanked me once more, her thanks was somewhat still foreign to me especially coming from her.

I scratched my head out of embarrassment and looked for the words to respond her.

"Tch, the least you could do is say my name correctly." I mumbled to her.

"Huh?" Her expression immediately was surprised.

"Don't 'huh' me, you know what I'm talking about." I don't know whether she called me Hikio because she forgets my name or she was just simply insulting me.

"You mean Hikigaya?" Her blank expression turned into a disgusted look. _There! You just said it!_

"There, that wasn't so hard."

"Pfft, not a chance, Hikio." Miura protested and rejected my suggestion.

"If you do remember, why call me Hikio?" I asked, a bit annoyed.

Miura let out a deep breath looking pretty much annoyed by all my questions for the past few minutes.

"Can't you just see that name is too lame for a guy like you.." Miura muttered yet I heard it clearly.

"Huh?" I immediately went blank. If I didn't know better, that was more like a…compliment.

 _Sure it's an insult calling my last name lame.. but it's a compliment at the same time somehow… maybe because she said too lame for someone like me, right?_

 _So did she always consider me as someone at the same class as her?_

Miura flinched as she slipped those words out of her mouth,

"forget what I said."

Miura's face flushed red; she quickly averted her gaze away from me. It was obvious that she was embarrassed by her words and leaned back once more on the sofa. I guess I can confirm that she really meant it.

I made a small smile before looking away from her and continued watching the movie on the television.

"Finish! Drinks up you guys!" Finally, Yuigahama finished preparing tea as she carried the tray of tea cups and pot to the coffee table of the living room.

She laid each of the cups and started pouring the tea in our respective tea cups. It looked like black tea yet the scent… something was really sinister about the scent… Even Miura seems to noticed what's off about the tea.

Once Yuigahama finished pouring the tea, she began switching stares between me and Miura. It seems like she was waiting for us to drink the tea. Miura started sipping the tea from her tea cup. When she did, she seemed to twitch, it was noticeable. Her expression looked sour, she swallowed the tea as if swallowing a rock. Miura let out a deep sigh afterwards.

Yuigahama switched her stares to me immediately after Miura. _I guess it's my turn huh? Kamakura… where are you…_

I began sipping a bit of the tea; just a droplet was enough to make my whole body shivering due to its awful taste. How did Yuigahama make something so simple taste so horrible? I let out a deep breath once I finished sipping the tea from my tea cup.

"So how is it? It's good right?" Yuigahama made her usual cheery smile and eyes sparkled with both her hands holding onto each other, as she waited for our comments about her tea.

"Are you like kidding? It's gro-"

"G-Great Yuigahama." I quickly interrupted Miura's fury from going any further, just in time before she finished her sentence. I let out a sigh of relief after. It sounded like she was about to say 'gross'… _but we can't have that, just look at Yuigahama._

If she were a dog right now, her tail would wag like crazy along with those cute innocent puppy dog eyes. So it would be heart wrenching to break that smile. _Miura really do have no mercy, as expected…_

"Phew, I'm glad. See Hikki, I told you." Yuigahama said as she took her triumph. _Gee, if you think it'd be good, why don't you taste it yourself? Now that I think about it, Yuigahama never did taste her own cooking or this tea… pfft, talk about using us as guinea pig to avoid death.. still it's edible I suppose._

"Anyway, how's school?" I asked directly to both of them.

"It's fine I guess.." Yuigahama answered me with a blank expression; it seems she didn't quite get what I meant.

"No, I mean.. after I punched Hayama, how was the atmosphere?" I asked specifically, to which the two look confused and hesitated to answer.

"Well…." Miura look worried and was trying to answer my question but she was unable to, so Yuigahama stepped in and answered for her.

"I guess, the news spread quickly and everybody in school talks bad about you." Yuigahama answered me then let out a dry laugh. _What difference does it make back then and now? They always talk bad about me anyway…_

"Ahh, but Hayato-kun was like it's okay and said he forgives Hikki, even Tobecchi was okay with it but I can't say the same for everyone else. Everyone was like against it saying that Hayato-kun shouldn't be too nice." Yuigahama explained further the situation at school after the incident. I wasn't surprised at all though.

"Too nice? Ha what a joke." Miura raise her voice and sipped her tea after. I was amaze her anger outweighs the horrible taste of Yuigahama's tea. I guess after the confession, she finally saw Hayama for who he truly was.. as Kawasaki like to call.. a faker.

After Miura finished sipping, she immediately stood up from her seat and grabbed her school bag. Me and Yuigahama stared at her, with both our expression puzzled.

"Sorry guys, I got some grocery shopping to do for my parents." Said Miura as she fixed her hair and skirt.

"Ah, it's okay. Thanks for coming with me anyway." Yuigahama gave her a smile in her direction.

While I said nothing but made a nod at her direction, she nodded in response and made a small smile which was surprising. Her smile was usually fierce and strength behind it, but this time there was a sense of warmth, gentle and kindness. It's a side I didn't know Miura even had.

"Bye bye Yumiko." Yuigahama waved her hand helplessly at Miura as she walked towards the doorway of the house and exited the Hikigaya Household. Still, I wonder.. was her sipping nothing but an act? Since the volume of the tea inside her cup remains unchanged.. I wondered if Yuigahama notices this.

After Miura left, Yuigahama stood up from the floor and took her seat on the sofa. She immediately switched off the television for some unknown reason. _Hey.. I was still watching that._

Yuigahama puts on somewhat a serious expression on her face then she gazed at me, looking like she was about to say something.

"Hikki.." Yuigahama called me with a low volume tone.

"Yeah?" I gazed at her as she called me.

"Umm, how are you anyway?" Yuigahama briefly asked. I know what she meant by that simple question, but I can still beat around the bush since it wasn't anything specific.

"I'm fine?"

"Eh, I mean how are you feeling you know.. after punching Hayato-kun…not going to school…" Yuigahama was being specific now with her question; still I'll answer her anyway.

"Well…." It seems I was unable to come up with an answer after all. My mind thought I would answer it yet, as I tried to spat out the words of my mind.. for some unknown reason, there was hesitation.

"Are you hurt Hikki?" Yuigahama asked me once more, this time the question seems more crucial to me.

"Of course not." I lied, deep inside me somewhere, there's a part of me still suffering.

Yuigahama lightly bit her lips then she casted her gaze to the floor and clenched her skirt. She was trembling a bit; I was taken aback by the sight of it.

"Yuiga.. are you okay?" I asked out of concern.

"I hate what Yukinon did to Hikki. She hurt Hikki..Hikki is suffering because of her." Yuigahama's voice trembled as she clenched her skirt even tighter. Was she angry? I've never seen Yuigahama acted like this before especially about Yukinoshita.

I tried to comfort her once more with mere words.

"Yuigahama, it's oka-"

"No! It's not okay!" Yuigahama's sudden out burst startled me, her shout echoed the room, and everything around us went dead silent as if time froze.; she stared at me with a soured expression along with tears started forming at the corner of her eyes. She twitched and her eyes fluttered after.

"Sorry." Yuigahama apologized and came back to her senses. She slightly bowed her head. Her soured expression earlier was replaced with guilt.

"It's fine." I said once more, as the atmosphere was engulf by an uneasy, tensioning air.

Once Yuigahama finished wiping what's left of her tears on her eyes, she returned casting her eyes down to the floor with both her hand on her lap. An uneasy silence filled the room, we both remain silent.

I was unable to come up with anything to break this uncomfortable silence, afraid that it would only worsen it.

I was never good on how to smooth such situation; it was always Yuigahama's job back then when we were in the service club, she always smooths things whenever things got a little intense and out of hand. It was her specialty. It's what makes her Yui Yuigahama after all.

Suddenly a light footstep was heard coming to our direction, along with a purring sound.

And, it was the Hikigaya Household guardian, Kamakura.

"Meoooow." Kamakura yawned loudly, attracting both mine and Yuigahama's attention. Kamakura then jumped on the coffee table and started sniffing on a certain scent. It was the fowl stench of Yuigahama's tea.

As Kamakura walked closer and closer to the source, he started sniffing on Miura's filled tea cup. Once Kamakura sniffed the tea, he flinched and quickly made a hiss to the tea with a fierce look. Kamakura growled at the tea cup and quickly ran away.

"Eh!?" Yuigahama was surprised while I let out a small chuckled.

"What's so funny Hikki!?" Yuigahama noticed my chuckle and asked with a bewildered look.

"I-It's nothing." I answered her. Yuigahama immediately made a pouting expression as she stared at me.

"My tea is bad isn't it Hikki?" Yuigahama asked as she was still pouting. Her expression was kind of… cute when you look at it for a while.

"Well….yes?" I hesitated at first and then admit it was a horrible tea.

"Ha I knew it, meanie!" Yuigahama reacted and pouted in a sulky pout.

"Hey I was just being honest." I tried to defend myself.

"I know then why did you lie in the first place? Hmph!" Yuigahama quickly turned her pouting expression face away from me. _How cute, her reaction of reminds me of Komachi whenever she's sulking… yet it was somewhat…_

"How annoying." I said and looked away from her.

"Hmph!" Yuigahama was still sulking and didn't even respond me.

"Hey you- "

"Hmmph!" It seems she was still avoiding me, but luckily I've gone through the same issue with Komachi so basically I'm experienced in dealing with this matter.

Whenever Komachi sulked I always ask her what she wanted and delivered to resolve the issue. Maybe I should do the same as well… _pfft, girls. Never satisfied with anything. Typical._

"Fine, what do you want me to do?" I asked her and she quickly turned her gaze to me and smiled triumphantly like she won over me.

"Now that you ask.." Yuigahama paused to think then she immediately smile like she thought of something already.

"How about the date you still owe me..Yup that's it!" Yuigahama answered as her smile widens and clapped her hands.

"What? Didn't we already gone over that with Yukinoshita?" I said and reminded her of our activity back then at the sea life park.

"Eh! That wasn't exactly a date! It's more like…a hangout…" Yuigahama corrected my statement. _Right, you're the one who called me and said 'hey Hikki let's have a date.' The last time…how forgetful._

"Besides, maybe now we can have a real date..." Yuigahama made a small smile as she casted her eyes down while mumbling something.

"Hmm?"

"Ohh, i-it's nothing. So how bout it?" Yuigahama asked for my confirmation. I guess it can't be helped, since I did promise her one.

"Sure I guess." I confirmed her. She immediately made a sweet big smile at my direction. I could tell that she's happy to hear it.

"Great! Yeay! I'll pick the perfect spot for the date." Yuigahama suggested, I nodded at her in response. I didn't mind her picking the place, since it's something I'm not good at..yet. Whatever makes her happy, that's fine with me I supposed.

And just like that, it was settle that we'll be having our date. Just the two of us.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

 _As I know him more_

 _As I got closer to him_

 _My feelings for him grew._

 _I wanted to know everything about him,_

 _Wanted to get even closer to him._

 _Because what I feel towards him,_

 _Is something I haven't felt for a long time._

 _It felt special, and I wanted that._

 _He gets the wrong idea at first,_

 _Mistaken my relationship with him as a pity and guilt for the accident back then._

 _But he was wrong._

 _I wanted to be with him, genuinely._

 _It wasn't out of pity._

 _Nor out of guilt._

 _But it's because…_

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

A few hours had passed since Yuigahama left the house, and both my mom and Komachi returned home. Once they did, we had our dinner early. It was still early, so my dad was still being a corporate slave somewhere.

It was already a few minutes after we finished dinner. Komachi was currently washing the dishes in the kitchen while I was sitting on the sofa reading some random magazines I found in my room, that's where I came across the word, 'couple'.

I began reading the contents of the magazine and flipped to a certain page with the topic of, ' _what to do and what not to doon your first date'_. The topic itself seems promising; I thought maybe I could gain some information regarding my upcoming activity with Yuigahama while I'm at it.

As I read through the page, there were numbers of steps on how to have a successful date. According to the byline this topic was written by an experienced man, it's somewhat convenient since this was from a man's perspective. Okay let's begin!

 **What to do:**

 **Step 1. Remember that boy's always have to make the first move at everything that includes starting a conversation.**

 _Starting the conversation huh? That's inconvenient… my weak point right off the bat._

 **Step 2. You have to prove yourself a gentlemen by treating your girl and spend your money for her needs and wants on your date with her.**

 _There goes my allowance for this month.. I better check how much I have left._

 **Step 3. A boy must always sacrifice his safety for hers…**

 _Okay now that's just non sense! This information is complete nonsense. I don't really have to do all these things especially sacrificing my own life._

 _I mean what guy does that? He'd have to be that desperate and pathetic to do those kinds of things just for a girl…_

I stopped myself from furthering on the 'what to do' list and shifted my gaze on the 'what not to do' section list. These will be efficient enough, it wasn't necessary to do all those stuff I've just read. What's important was what not to do on the date. Let's begin!

I started focusing on the respective section and began reading through it.

 **What no to do:**

 **Step 1. Don't even try to steal a kiss from her on the first date, or you'll get b**** slap from her. Trust me.**

 _Don't worry, I'm not planning to._

 **Step 2. Don't and I mean don't touch that certain part of the women's body. It's too early!**

 _What the… too early? What the hell was this supposed to mean.._

 **Step 3. Don't even think about going to a hotel and-**

 _Oh wow! Experience my butt! This whole thing was written by a pervert who got dump to whole new level. This is just too ecchi-_

"Hey what are you reading?"

"Gah!"

I startled and almost jumped from my seat by a sudden voice near my ear. I reflexively turned around behind the sofa and it was my mom already in her pajamas with a towel wrapped around her head to dry off her hair.

My mom blinked twice behind her specs as she stared at me with a blank looked, waiting for a response from me.

"U-Uh it's nothing." I stammered, trying to cover it up. I was too nervous to look at her and answered her honestly about reading something so inappropriate. She may get the wrong idea and would be furious. I couldn't stand to face her snake eyes again. _It's just too scary.._

"Nothing huh? It's definitely something." My mom made a teasing smile and instantly took the magazine from my hand before I even blink and realize it wasn't there anymore. _So quick!_

She took her seat beside me on the sofa and began looking through page I was reading . She mumbled the contents of the magazine.

"What to do and what not to do on your first date?" Her eyes behind her specs widen with a look of surprised.

"Hachiman.." My mom called out to me, as she shifted her gaze from the magazine to my direction. _Please not the snake eyes, not the snake eyes…_

"Could it be perhaps you're having a date?" Her eyes immediately sparkled and a smile formed on her lips. I was a bit relief she wasn't mad, and didn't read the contents further on. _Phew.._

"Well yeah I suppose." I briefly answered her. My mom started clapping her hands out of joy.

"Hey hey what's going on?" Komachi suddenly came to us. It seems she finished washing the dishes.

"Our Hachiman will be having a date." My mom cheerfully answered Komachi.

"Aha really onii-chan?" Komachi squealed and reacted the same way mom did earlier.

"Yeah."

"With who onii-chan?" Komachi asked specifically to who I was going to date with. She looked like she already knew even though she was asking me.

"Yuigahama." I answered.

"Ohh that girl from yesterday?"

"Yui-san? I'm so proud of you onii-chan… you finally ask her out." _I didn't exactly ask her out though, it was more like a deal we made back then._

My mom nodded as if she approves of my date with Yuigahama while Komachi let out a dry sob covering her whole face with her hand. I could only scratched my head and looked away from them. _Man, what a bunch.._

"Mm? Mom, what's that?" Komachi noticed the magazine that mom was still holding onto.

"Ahh, this. It's some magazine that Hachiman was looking into on how to date."

"Huh? Lemme see." Komachi asked my mom for the magazine, and she obediently handed it to her. _I'm not liking where this is going.._

"Let's see… what to do..step 1. Remember that boy's always have to make the first move. Aha, that's true." Komachi began reading the rest of the list loudly, while my mom could only smile and silently listened to Komachi. I did nothing but waited for her to finish, and was a bit anxious to how my mom would react to the content of the topic on the magazine.

"Onii-chan, this will be very helpful on your date! Komachi approves of this!" Komachi gave a thumb up at my direction, but suddenly I remembered there was also a presence beside me on the sofa, it was my mom. I glanced at her, and her expression was calm yet the atmosphere around her was pressurizing me.

"Komachi…."

"Hmm? Yes mom?"

"Sorry, but I'm afraid I have to reject such methods. I won't allow my son to do such things." My mom protested and rejected the methods of the contents in the magazine.

"Huh? Why not?" Komachi made a pouting expression at my mom.

"Because Komachi, it's just too… what do people like you call it.. ah, overboard." My mom stated, and then Komachi's eyebrow twitched and her expression turned into a glare with eyes narrowed to mom.

"Y'know mom..it's not every day onii-chan gets a date, consider his eye and all."

"That's true, and I'm happy for him. Yet my son is still young and has so much to live for, so I can't allow my son to sacrifice himself over a mere girl." My mom narrowed her eyes and glared at Komachi as well.

"That's why I'm making sure onii-chan won't make any mistake with his partner." Komachi continued glaring at mom and defended her statement of me.

"Ohh, his partner? What about Hachiman himself? It's obviously you're not considering his well-being." My mom protested to Komachi and defended me she continued exchanging glares with Komachi.

"Now that's just selfish when you don't think about the person next to onii-chan!"

"How is thinking about your own son well-being selfish!?"

Those two continued their little debate for a while, I did nothing but tried my best to ignore their loud voices shouting between both my ears.

To me, I'm already used to this because this was something you see every day in the Hikigaya Household. These two were always at each other's throat and exchanging glares on every occasion especially when the topic was about me.

Komachi thinks she knows what's best for me, so did mom but their opinions were way different from another.

Komachi's opinion on what's best for me was what she thinks was best for the second person but not me.

While my mom was the opposite, she cared only about me and only me but not the people around me.

Hence, why they always debated.

These two were probably the only people in the world who cared so much about me than anyone else, I was grateful and appreciated that yet it was just too creepy in some way. I can't say the same for pops though.

Maybe I should try to calm them down,

"Hey that's enough-"

"Be quiet son!"

"Shaddup onii-chan!"

Both their overlapping voices between me startled me and my attempt to calm the heat of this battle,

And so I gave up and just continued to ignore them.

After a few minute had passed of exchanging glares and strong words between those two, both me and my mom sat quietly on the living room sofa and was engaged in our own activity.

My mom was busy fiddling her phone with some business related issue. She'll be returning home from work much early than usual until my suspension was over because it was part of the agreement with the principal she discussed for me to have parental guidance during my time of suspension.

Komachi went straight upstairs to take a shower after her debate with mom. Probably to cool herself down, it was an intense battle between her and mom as always.

While I on the other hand was reading my novel on the page where I left off. The novel wasn't just for my pleasure but it also served as a distraction or something to kill time with.

"Hey Hachiman…" My mom called me all of the sudden, I stopped reading my novel and faced her direction.

"Yeah?"

"Who came by today?" My mom asked while her gaze was still on her phone and both her thumbs used to type something on her phone. _She knows huh?_

I guess she must've noticed the dry tea cups and tea pot on the rack after I washed them this afternoon before she returns home along with Komachi. My mom's observational skills were always sharp and spot on. It was one of the many skills she possessed.

"Some friends." I briefly answered her.

"Hachiman. When I ask 'who', I want names, gender and age" My mom said vigorously with a sharp voice. _How demanding.._

"Yuigahama and Miura. Both females. Around my age I guess." I obediently answered her by order. Once I finished answering her, I returned my gaze back to my novel.

"Oh, and why were they visiting?" My mom asked once more. _What is this? Am I being interrogated or something?_

"Well, they're concern about me so yeah."

"Oh is that so? You weren't doing anything at all?" My mom continued her interrogation on me, yet this question she just asked. There was more to it, _lewd maybe?_

"No not at all. We were just drinking tea." I briefly answered her and not beating around that topic any further to prevent any misunderstanding or any wrong idea. Well truth be told, it was more than just drinking tea this afternoon.

"Really? It seems you're not going to talk about what really happened." I startled by her statement, _how did she-..wait, I get it. Nice try mom._

"Like I said, we were just drinking." I repeated nonchalantly. Still I almost fell for one of her traps.

It was one of her extraction tactics which was for the first party to pretend like they know everything but they don't, so the second party will be lured blindly, making them slip out the truth from their mouth. Like being dozed with a truth serum.

She let out a sigh indicating she was finish with her interrogation and adjusted her specs before continued pressing her phone.

After knowing her for long period of time, I already grasped of what kind of woman she was and never once fell into her cheap tactics much frequently than before.

My mom was the kind of woman, who seeks nothing but the truth and only the truth in reality, in this world of lies. She would use any methods or even use any bait in means to expose any lie to reveal the truth. A monster of truth, if I may.

As for her occupation, I was never interested where she works or what her job was, maybe because I was never interested in my own ambition to work or delve deeper on the topic itself since I dream and aim only to become a househusband. I could only assume she was just a mere corporate slave along with pops. _Meh, who cares? Not my problem._

Footsteps were heard coming from the stairs, I turned in reflex to the sound of it and it was Komachi dressed in her pajamas as she continued drying off her hair with her towel.

"Ah that was a good shower!" Komachi let out a sigh of relief afterwards.

She walked towards our direction and took her seat on my right side of the sofa; I was currently sitting between my mom and Komachi. They were rather close, it was unsettling… _close! Too close!_

Komachi then put her towel aside, and grabbed the magazine again from the coffee table.

"Well, where were we?" Komachi mutterd to the magazine she was holding, and began flipping to the page where she left off.

"Hey why are you still reading that?" I nervously asked and a bit irritated.

"Hmm? To help onii-chan with his date of course! Plus this info seems reliable." Komachi said and smiled energetically.

"Honestly.." My mom mumbled annoyingly to Komachi's statement.

Komachi didn't so much made any response to that and just ignored mom. While I only let out a deep sigh. Just watching these two at it was tiring enough.

Komachi began muttering the contents of the page in a low whisper but it was still audible since she was closed by beside me.

"Hmm… what not to do?"

I suddenly startled as Komachi read that sentence out loud _,_ because I was worried the woman beside me will overheard the lewd and vulgar contents of the list. _Shit, don't read it…_

"Step 1." _Stop it, stop it!_

"Don't even try to steal…a kiss from her on the first date, or you'll get… b**** slap from her?" Komachi made a confused expression as she reads it out loud. I slowly peek a glanced at mom's direction, her thumbs that were typing on her phone suddenly paused. _Crap, she heard it!_

"What's with these words? Still it's true though onii-chan, don't rush! Take it nice and slow." Komachi giggled as she stated that,

My mom on the other hand, resumed her fiddling with her phone. It seems she didn't mind it and agreed. That's a relief.

"On with step 2!" Komachi declared as she began reading the step 2 of what not to do on a first date. _Shit, there's no stopping her.._

"Don't and I mean don't….touch that certain…..part of the….women's…body..ugh. onii-chan what is this?" Komachi's smiled earlier slowly turned into a disgusted look as she reads that statement. I glanced at mom again, and once again her fingers stopped yet her expression seem what, blank.

Komachi 's eyes that were focused on the contents of the magazine slowly scrolled downwards indicating she was about to read the last statement with a confused expression and furrowed eyebrows. _Not good…_

"step..3…"

"Don't even think about.. going...to..a...hotel and-"

"Hachiman…"

Komachi stopped reading further as her and mine attention was shifted to mom who called me with a cold piercing sharped voice.

I slowly turned to her, and she abruptly turned her face to me and just stared at me with a sinister smile.

"Y-Yes? What is it?" I stuttered.

"Why do you possess such items? I wonder." My mom continued smiling as she asked that.

"Yeah onii-chan." Komachi agreed with mom as she looked at me with a disgusted look.

"It's umm-"

"Perhaps you were fantasizing about something?" My mom assumed that statement. _What the hell is that supposed to mean!?_

"Eww, I didn't know onii-chan was this type of person." Komachi quickly made some distance from me.

"No hell I'm no-"

They both let out a deep sigh with a looked of despair on their expression as if they gave up on me.

I was unable to make any response to their statement since I kept getting interrupted, I was cornered. Trapped like a rat in a cage.

Neither of their statement was true about me, yet it left me speechless and mouth wide open. _I can't believe these two.. Really, how could they even think so negative of me, so easily…_

My mom tapped on my shoulder and nodded.

"Well, you are a male after all. So it's understandable." My mom smiled and spoke that nonchalantly. _No, please don't start look at me as a pervert._

"That's true I guess. Poor onii-chan." Komachi agreed as well. _Not you too.._

These two were an odd pair. They debated each other when they cared for what's best for me but sometimes they agreed each other when it comes to against my negative well-being.

I let out a deep sigh, it was too late and too tired to even defend myself so I let them slide with their nonsensical assumptions of me.

 _It's hopeless._

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

 _Why is it, that every time.._

 _Every time I tried to profess my feelings to him_

 _We ended up averting away from it.._

 _It's as if something or maybe some force in place,_

 _Stopped this feeling from reaching him._

 _It was always been the two of us and him,_

 _Battling on who would win his heart._

 _Then unexpectedly and unbelievably she found someone else._

 _But now that she's out, and there was no competition,_

 _Should I proceed to him?_

 _I hesitated at first._

 _It feels wrong in many ways to take advantage of the current situation for my selfish desire of him._

 _All I could think of, was he the one?_

 _There was no doubt that he was the one for me._

 _My feelings for him was set,_

 _Was confidently true,_

 _He was a part my happiness._

 _Something I've sought for a long time,_

 _But, sometimes I wonder._

 _Who was truly the one for him?_

 _What's his happiness?_

 _These were the questions that I was afraid to know the answer to._

 _And the only one, who knows the answer to these questions,_

 _Was himself._

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

The following day arrived, which also marks the second day of suspension as well. I was currently waiting on Yuigahama who still hasn't showed up yet. We could've arranged the date of our activity during the weekends but instead she wanted it today right after school.

The appointed time was supposed to be two O'clock in the afternoon after homeroom was finish and it was already passed thirty minutes from it. As usual, apparently I was already used to Yuigahama's habit of being late on schedule.

The designated place of our activity for today was at one of Chiba Prefecture's main attraction in Ichikawa, **Satomi Park**.

She did well at picking the place for once; Satomi Park was an ideal place to visit during the spring season because of its large quantity and variety of flower gardens and trees in the area,

Such as the rose garden, wisteria trellis, ume grove, flowers each season and especially the cherry blossom.

The park was known as a major cherry blossom viewing spot.

If I remember my history lesson correctly, the park itself used to be an old battlefield where the Satomi Clan fought against the Hojo Clan in the Muromachi period. The name of the park itself tells us who won that battle. I hardly believe such a beautiful and peaceful place used to be a battlefield. _Quite the irony I must say.._

While waiting for her, I was sitting on the bench near the fountain, enjoying the sight and the overflowing scent of flowers around the area. It was sunny, but the weather forecast this morning did say there was a possibility that it might rain around this afternoon. Seems like the possibility of it was low since it was a clear sky.

The park wasn't very crowded since it was still a school day. The atmosphere was perfect _._

The sun was shining.

The sky was clear.

The bird's chirping, singing their season song.

A breeze made its way passing the scent of the flowers around the area in the process of diffusion.

I let out a sigh of relief and made a smile to myself.

It was a beautiful day to enjoy in such beautiful scenery.

I checked my watch once more and then,

"Hikkiiiiii!" A shout was heard from the distance, there was only one person who refers to me by that nickname.

I looked to my left and it was none other than Yui Yuigahama. She ran towards my direction with a pair of sandals, wearing a white sleeveless blouse along with denim shorts that exposed the skin of her slender legs and since it was sunny, she was also wearing a sunflower hat as a barrier from the heat of the sun.

My expression went blank and mouth left hanging as to how surprisingly stunning she was. Normally her sense of fashion was just average or below, but this completely showed her feminine side. She looked quite more mature and ladylike.

Yuigahama stopped running as she was already in front of me panting and catching her breath.

"Sorry, I'm late Hikki. I had to go home, took a shower, get changed and here I am. Heee." Yuigahama giggled along with a wry smile while I only stared at her, still stunned by her appearance.

"Hikki?"

I startled and came back to my senses once she called my name again.

"Uh yeahh, sure no problem." I said to her as I calmed myself.

"So how do I look?" Yuigahama asked and stared at me, waiting for a response to her outfit of the day.

"You look.. good.. I guess." I flustered and immediately looked away from her while scratching my head out of embarrassment.

"T-Thank you." I could tell by her tone that Yuigahama's embarrassed. Silence came for a brief moment.

Suddenly, a sound of a piano can be heard, along with the tuning of a guitar. Consider how loud it was, it seems to be nearby somewhere.

"Ah." Yuigahama smiled and quickly grabbed my hand, dragging me to the source of the sound.

She stopped pulling me as we reached on the other side of the huge fountain.

"Look Hikki!" Yuigahama pointed her finger and I looked over to where she's pointing at.

"Oh, street band?" I mumbled. The sound earlier was from the street band that was currently playing their music here near the fountain at the center of the park.

There were 3 people in the band, two male; a guitarist who was tuning his guitar and a pianist testing his keyboard and the other one was a female vocalist holding a mic waiting for her bandmates to finish with their respective instrument.

Near them was an opened guitar casing filled with bits of money and coins from people who walked pass them, listening to their music and enjoyed it.

I always wondered what they do with that money. Consider their outfits and the quality of their instruments; it looked like money wasn't a problem. Charity perhaps? _Maybe I should give some too._

"Hikki, maybe we should give them too." Yuigahama suggested. _You've read mind. But still…_

"Umm Yuigahama.."

"Hmm?" Once Yuigahama stared at me, I pointed my fingers nonchalantly to our two hands that were still clinging onto each other.

As she looked at it, her face slowly reddens and she quickly pulled her hand from mine.

"S-Sorry!" Yuigahama apologized and was blushing hard.

"It's cool." I replied her and proceeded to reaching out my wallet from my pocket to give the band our charity.

"Ah hold on, I'll give one too."

"No it's fine, I'll give one for you too." I stopped Yuigahama and decided to pay her share as well. For some reason, I was in a good mood today.

I started walking towards the street band and a mumbling was heard coming from Yuigahama behind me. I didn't hear it clearly what she was saying and just ignored it.

"Thank you for your hard work." I said to the street band and threw my money along with Yuigahama's share into the guitar case. They smiled and bowed their heads slightly in response for my charity.

After that's done, I walked back to where Yuigahama was. I nodded at her indicating that I was done giving them the charity money.

"So what now?" I asked, and then suddenly a rumbling sound made its way to my ear. _What the hell was that?_

It sounded like a wild animal, lurking. I checked my surrounding to see where the noise was coming from.

"Umm Hikki.." I stopped and turned to Yuigahama.

"Hmm?"

Yuigahama scratched her head and let out a dry laugh for some unknown reason.

"That was my stomach, Hikki." Yuigahama continued her dry laughter as she stated that. _It was… her... stomach?_

"I haven't eaten anything this morning." Yuigahama said as she intertwined her fingers together out of embarrassment.

"Lunch break?" I asked. She could've eaten something during lunch; I was bewildered to why she didn't.

"Well, I did want to..then Iroha-chan asked me to help with some student council stuff. So yeah." Yuigahama briefly answered her reasons.

 _Wow, that fox. So insensitive…_

But somehow, I felt like it was my fault that Yuigahama got drag by Isshiki. If I were at school this morning, I would be the one that Isshiki comes to for help like always but because of my suspension, she make do with Yuigahama as my replacement.

So it was ultimately my fault. She didn't even eat lunch just to help Isshiki with her selfish needs. So the least I could do to make up for that was to treat her to one.

I let out a deep sigh before offering her something to eat.

"There's a nearby food stall, around the park. Let's go." I decided to fill that empty stomach of hers as our first activity for today.

"Mm!" Yuigahama smiled and nodded in agreement.

I placed my hands in my pockets and started walking to where the stall was, Yuigahama followed me quickly from behind, slowly catching up to me and finally walked beside me.

I was surprised that she still had the energy to run on an empty stomach.

While we were on our way to the food stall, I could hear the sound of consecutive shutter snaps coming from next to me. Apparently Yuigahama was taking pictures of the scenery of the park, passing by a variety of gardens with different kinds of flowers planted in them.

The people around us chattered, laughing, taking a pictures as well, some took a picture of themselves, group photos and such. It was a cheerful day; perhaps it was the season that made that kind of atmosphere. Spring was a kind of season to look forward to by many after all.

As we arrived to the food stall which was outside of the entrance to the cherry blossom trees, I immediately looked at the billboard menu. Yuigahama puts her phone away to look as well. It looked like their specialty was making crepes, I guess that'll do. I gazed at Yuigahama who was still looking through the menu board.

"So?" I asked Yuigahama what she'll be having.

"Hmm… I can't decide." _There are only five of them…_

I let out a short sigh, and waited for Yuigahama to make a decision.

"Ah, I'll just have the peanut butter crepes." Yuigahama answered and I nodded in response to her choice.

"Excuse, one peanut butter crepes please. Oh and I'll have this please."

"Sure kid!"

I told the cooker of the stall and purchased a can of MAX COFFEE at the counter. Yuigahama tilted her head as she stared at me looking a bit confused

"You're not eating Hikki?"

"I already had lunch." I briefly answered Yuigahama's question.

"Ohh."

While waiting for Yuigahama's crepes to finish, we took out seat on a nearby bench. I opened my can of coffee and began gulping it. Yuigahama made a brief stretch with her arms before taking her seat next to me.

"It sure is a beautiful day." Yuigahama said while facing forward.

"Uh huh." I replied her and looked up to the sky.

When I did, I was surprised due to the clear sky earlier was already filled with small white clouds. I guess the possibility of a rainy day was possible now. I took another sip of my coffee, and a scent of hot peanut butter could be smelt from the food stall.

"It looks like it's about to rain soon huh." I said, and Yuigahama stared at me then she immediately looked up at the sky as well.

"Huhhhh?" Yuigahama reacted to the clouded sky, looked somewhat disappointed.

"Why today of all day!?" Yuigahama started whining to no one but the sky itself. _Hey you, stop it! People might think you're crazy talking to the sky._

"There's no helping it, it's nature after all." I made a brief respond to the whining Yuigahama.

"Besides, the flowers and trees wouldn't have bloom if it wasn't for the rain you know." I explained Yuigahama shortly and took another sip of my coffee.

Yuigahama shifted her gaze to me with a blank expression on her face.

"Huh? Why?"

"What do you mean why? Haven't you heard of photosynthesis?" I reluctantly asked her vigorously.

"Beh, of course I know that dummy!" Yuigahama lightly punched my right arm as she answered that.

"Really now? Which pigment in the plants is responsible for such process?" I asked her but I had low expectation of her answering that question correctly. It was the easiest question after all and she's dense when it comes to the obvious.

"Ah, I know this..hmmm…" Yuigahama made a thinking posture with her hand holding onto her chin. It seems she was trying so hard to grasp the answer.

Yuigahama began mumbling as she was thinking of what the pigment was.

"Chloro…" I furrowed my eyebrow once I heard that word slowly coming out from her mouth. _Ohh, she knows? That's a surprise._

"Clorox?" Yuigahama once again never ceased to amaze me. _That's a bleach gahama-chan… the correct answer should be chlorophyll._

"You're hopeless." I mumbled and she quickly reacted with a "waaaah".

Silence filled between once again.

"If it's going to rain… then…" Yuigahama worriedly said, I stared at her, listening to what she's about to say.

"Then we have to enjoy this date as much as possible!" Yuigahama said vigorously with her fist raise, eyes full of compassion and determination.

I was a bit surprised, but that's Yuigahama's strongest traits, high spirited, high hope along with a burning determination. It's also that same trait that was tiresome to me and troubling.

"Oiiii! Serves up!" The cooker of the stall called us from his stall as he held Yuigahama's finished crepes up high.

"Aha, there's my crepes!" Yuigahama happily smiled as she saw her crepes was finish. I wonder was it her or her stomach that's happy.

"Wait here. I'll get it." I told her briefly to wait on the bench.

"Huh? But I need to pay for it."

"It's my treat."

Yuigahama's face for some reason immediately blushed. I stood up from my seat and throw my finished can of MAX COFFEE to the nearby rubbish bin.

"Hikki.. your kind of nicer than usual today." Yuigahama made a small smile at me with her face still slightly red.

 _It's not that I'm nice; this was just to make up for my guilt of Isshiki dragging you out from lunch._

I started walking away from the bench and towards the food stall to pick her crepes. Once there I paid the cooker for her crepes, and then returned to Yuigahama.

"Here"

"Thanks!"

I handed Yuigahama's crepes to her and shook my head telling that it wasn't a big deal.

"Come on, let's go." I said to her to which she made a blank looked at my direction from her seat.

"What? We didn't come here to sit around and wait for the rain." I scratched my head, slightly embarrassed and look away from her.

Yuigahama's giggle was heard.

"Hikki is looking forward to this date after all huh?" Yuigahama continued her giggling while I quickly flustered by her statement.

"It's not that, it's just what I said earlier. We didn't come here to-"

"Alright, alright. Whatever you say Hikki."

I could feel my face reddened, Yuigahama let out a chuckled before standing up from her seat and was ready to sightseeing the park before rain comes. I couldn't see what expression she was making underneath that sunflower hat.

When she did stand up, she gave me an unusual girly smile to me which caused my face to further redden. I quickly looked away to prevent her from seeing my embarrassed reaction.

"Let's go!" Yuigahama shouted spiritedly, as usual was she trying to embarrass me? I'm surprised no one has turned their attention to us.

I made a look of irritation but she didn't notice as she started walking ahead to wherever she was heading to. I only followed her from behind, letting her lead me to where she was interested in going around the park. There were numerous of gardens here so I wouldn't know where to begin.

"Hikki! Here!" Yuigahama shouted my name, calling me to where she was. I obediently came to her location and saw a garden filled with,

"Sunflowers?" I muttered.

"There's dandelion too!" Yuigahama happily said and smiled, pointing her fingers to the garden.

 _Sunflower and dandelion huh?_ It certainly was a good pair; just looking at those two flowers was enough to scrub off my eyes from its soreness. The scent itself was also overwhelming and very relieving; it freshened up my entire body, feeling like I was reborn or something.

Yuigahama was amaze by the sight of large quantity of sunflowers and dandelion in one garden; she was going "uwaaaaah" and "oooohhh" for some time now, while munching through her crepes. I did nothing but silently enjoy the sight and scent of the garden.

Once we feel satisfied, we moved on to famous scenery at the eastern part of the park. As we arrived, there was a long archway of beautiful trellises of wisteria.

It was quite a sight, I was in awe by its stunning spectacle so was Yuigahama. We began walking into the trellis of wisteria, or more likely a tunnel of wisteria where all of them were hanging each side and top until the end.

"Hikki! Take a picture of me!" Yuigahama handed me her phone and I oblige her request.

"Ready?" I notified Yuigahama the camera was set to take a shot of her. She took her position in the middle of the tunnel still holding onto her crepes.

"Okay 1…2.." When I counted, she immediately grinned widely showing her teeth confirming her expression for the photo and that's where I stopped counting because something was up the moment she showed her teeth.

"Umm Yuigahama… your teeth. It's filled with leftovers." I informed her, that her teeth were filled with leftovers of peanut butter from her crepes stuck between her teeth.

"Ah!? Really!?" Yuigahama startlingly ask me, and I clicked onto her front camera so she can inspect it for herself.

She immediately let out a dry laugh when she saw herself on the phone with her leftover in her mouth. She may look like a highschooler but deep inside she's a kindergartener making silly little mistakes like a normal kid.

"Hang on for a moment." Yuigahama closed her mouth and began cleaning her teeth with her tongue, it was noticeable. I made a disgusted look and averted my gaze away from her. It was.. disturbing.

"Done!" Yuigahama showed her teeth once more to the camera, I gazed at her and checked, there were no traces of leftover anymore.

Yuigahama returned back to her position once more, making the same grinning looked and was now ready for her photoshoot.

"Okay, 1… 2… 3." I pressed the button and took a photo of her.

The background of wisteria surprisingly suits her whole image. I made a small smile to myself in response to how happy she looked in this photo.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

 _If there's one thing I learn, in my entire life was that_

 _There will always be that one person in this vast world_

 _That we truly want to be with._

 _The moment I saw him suffering,_

 _Even though he had me to be with him during his struggles,_

 _It wasn't enough._

 _Sometimes even if things don't go the way we want to_

 _We can't help but wish for their happiness._

 _He was my happiness but I wish I could say the same for him._

 _I wish I was his happiness._

 _Unfortunately, it was obvious that his happiness,_

 _His desire, lie elsewhere._

 _Even so…_

 _I feel like something still holding me, like_

 _There was still an anchor that's been stuck on the bottom of the ocean for a quite a while now._

 _I still want these feelings to reach to him._

 _Never again will I hid this feeling away from him anymore._

 _I won't let my feelings be averted any longer._

 _Even if my feelings do get casted away, the least I want was for him to_

 _Hear me out,_

 _Hear my voice as I speak my feelings for him._

 _I wanted him to know how I truly feel_

 _That way,_

 _The anchor could be lifted._

 _And once it does.._

 _I can finally…_

 _Finally…_

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

An hour had passed, since then we walked around the park sightseeing the various gardens, flowers and trees visiting the northern part of the park to the southern part and took a lot of pictures along the way. We took a five minutes break on a nearby bench whenever one of us was tired from walking.

I could feel myself slowly becoming sluggish and tiring. I was literally dragging my feet, forcing them to walk for another extended time.

We were currently heading to the western part of the Satomi Park where the main attraction was there, a wide area full of cherry blossom trees.

As we arrived, it was surprisingly beautiful than I had expected. I've seen pictures of this place from the magazine, but I never thought it would be more stunning seeing it with my naked eyes. I've never seen so much cherry blossom trees. There were everywhere. Everything was pink!

"This way Hikki!" Yuigahama energetically led me to wherever she was going. I didn't respond or ask to where she was leading me, so I silently followed her from behind.

As we were walking on the concrete path, ahead was Yuigahama who was walking ahead with her hand clutching to another behind her back, I couldn't make out what expression she was making but it seems she was having a good time so that's a relief. I kept turning my head left and right, enjoying the scenery of the wide range of cherry blossoms.

We immediately stopped walking as we stumbled upon a crossway; Yuigahama looked left and right of the crossway deciding which way to go to with a calmed expression. I waited silently for her to decide which way.

"It should be left I think." Yuigahama whispered to herself.

She made a slight nod before pointing out to me which way to walk.

"Here Hikki."

Yuigahama's tone all the sudden sounded a bit serious and not her usual cheery, energetic tone, and her expression when she turned to me seems expressionless. I felt uneasy by it.

She started walking ahead and I obediently followed her like a dog following his master. We didn't exchange look or words any further. I don't know whether she was too tired to talk or something was bothering her.

I know Yuigahama long enough to know when she's silent, something was definitely going on. Yet I decided to not ask her what it was and remain silent.

After a while walking in this direction in complete silence, there were long stairs on a hill up ahead. Yuigahama paused for a moment; it looked like she was catching her breath as she inhaled and exhaled the air.

She started walking the stairs of the hill, but before I started walking I couldn't help but feel curious to where we were going, so I asked.

"Oi Yuiga, where we going anyway?" I asked.

"You'll see once we reach there." Yuigahama answered me calmly without turning around.

After my question was, technically not answered she continued walking the stairs. I ignored my curiosity and just followed her walking the stairway of the hill. The hill wasn't really high, it's roughly around 20 meter high I supposed if I know my math correctly.

A moment of silence filled the air once more as we walked up the stairs, even though Yuigahama looked calm but she's usually energetic, loud and reckless but right now she seemed different, her calmness was bothering me.

As we got closer to the summit, Yuigahama paused for just a moment and started running the stairs.

"Hey be careful." I warned her.

She stopped, turning around to me and she was smiling happily.

"Come on Hikki!" said Yuigahama loudly and energetically.

It seemed she was back to her usual self, what's with the split personality though? It did not matter. She's back to normal, that's a relief.

She ignored my warning and ran up anyway; I didn't run but just walked in a quick pace. Somewhere inside me, I was a bit excited to know what's waiting on the peak of the hill.

As I arrived and stepped foot on the summit, I immediately went speechless due to the astonishing view of the whole park from up here. The flowing of the Edogawa River can also be seen from here.

I could see everything from up here, the northern part, the eastern as well as the southern. The whole park looked colorful from up here mainly because of the various colors of trees and garden all over the area.

Luckily there was no one around on the summit, that way I can enjoy a nice time of peace and quiet while enjoying the view.

Yuigahama proceeded in taking her seat on the bench under between the two cherry blossom trees. There were no other cherry blossom trees up here except these two. Well consider how high the hill and how small the space was along with the humidity, it'd makes sense only two tree of cherry blossom could manage to grow within this conditions.

I took my seat as well next to Yuigahama. She then stared at me, still smiling.

"Well? What do you think?" Yuigahama asked for a comment regarding this place and the view.

"Well, I'm impressed and amazed. How do you know this place anyway?" I stated my comment and asked her after.

"When I was little, I cried a lot, so my mom usually brings me to this place the next day just to cheer me up." Yuigahama briefly explained her answer.

"Oh that so?"

"Yup…Look Hikki!" Yuigahama pointed her finger forward. I looked over to where she pointed at, and my eyes widened by surprise.

"Mount Fuji?" I mumbled. It's faint but still visible, that's clearly Mount Fuji, right?

"Mhm." Yuigahama nodded.

 _Wow, you really do can see everything from here. Amazing!_

"Brings back memories huh?" Yuigahama chuckled as she said that.

"I guess."

Now that she mentioned it, we did saw Mount Fuji not so long ago. It was last year on a school trip, we saw the Mountain when we were on our way to Kyoto in the bullet train, me and Yuigahama along with Totsuka.

 _Totsuka.. I wonder how he is. How I've missed you!_

The moment of silence came to us, and we did nothing but enjoy the view and breeze from here.

Yuigahama gazed at the sky for a short moment, before reaching out her phone and began fiddling with it. Looks like she was texting someone.

I shifted my gaze from her and to the sky; clouds were slowly almost covering the sun. I guess it's about to rain after all.

"Hikki."

I gazed at Yuigahama by reflex as she called me.

"Do you remember last year when we walked home from the summer festival that night?" Yuigahama asked if I remembered, and there was no doubt I remembered it like it was yesterday.

"Yes." I answered her.

"Do you… do you know what I was going to tell back then?" Yuigahama asked another question, but she was more specific this time.

I was afraid that she might bring this up again in the near future. Back then I knew what she was going to say, but I wasn't ready for it. I was afraid it would change me, degrading me like I am right now; it was all because of that person, Yukinoshita. She confessed to me, gotten into me and in the end, destroyed me inside out. I let my guard down; blinded by a foolish desire I used to have.

If Yuigahama had successfully told me the same thing Yukinoshita did back then, maybe the result would've been the sa-

 _No. What I am thinking!? This is an entirely different person in front of me, this is Yuigahama not Yukinoshita._

"Hikki."

Her voice startled me and I came back from my thought to my senses again. I hesitated, but she may already notice that I know. So there was no point in lying.

"Y-Yeah." I finally answered her.

"I knew that you know Hikki, I'm glad." Yuigahama made a forced laugh.

"Why are you bringing this up?"

She removed her gaze from me and casted her eyes down.

"I know, you're suffering Hikki. I wanted to help you end your struggling. I know it's too soon but even so, I.."

"What are you saying Yuigahama?" I asked reluctantly.

"Even though you already knew, how I truly feel about you Hikki… I still.." Her voice begins to trembled, but she swallowed what's in her mouth before continued speaking.

"I still want you to hear it. Hear me saying it from my own voice. Hear these words coming from my mouth."

"Yuiga…." I was trying to say something to comfort her but was unable to. maybe I was trying to stopped her again like back then. Back then I manage to avert it when her mom called her through her phone. It was convenient timing. Now, there was no way out of this.

All I could do now was wait silently for those words to come out from her voice.

"Hikki.." She lifted her head and turned it to me, she stared at me with a sad smile forming on her face.

"I've always, love you. Hikki." Tears started forming on the corner of her eyes. Yuigahama wiped the tears on her eyes everytime it started forming.

I knew how she truly feel about me all this time, but hearing her saying those words coming from her own mouth, was somewhat different than I expected. I was daze; I didn't know what to think.

 _Wait…_

She did say, she wanted to end my struggling didn't she? Was this her solution? I began thinking her words, my struggling and the solution to end it.

 _This is it. This is the answer to my problem._

The answer was already there, the solution was right in front of me. It was the easiest way out from my struggles I've suffered this entire time.

I remembered what Miura said about letting it all out, I thought for sure that would be a hint to my solution if I think it through, but I didn't have time to delve deeper when the solution was right here, right now in front of me.

It was the logical move. It was the easiest way out. All I have to do now was to respond to Yuigahama. Accept her.

But something, inside of me was holding me back. Telling me to say no, that it felt wrong. It wasn't because I was afraid if I say no I would hurt Yuigahama, but it was something else. I couldn't grasp what it was but it did not matter.

All that matters was the answer to end my struggling. I trembled and opened my mouth to answer her.

"I…"

 _All I have to do was accept it._

"I…"

 _Just say yes, and all the suffering will be over._

Yuigahama stared at me calmly, silently listened to me, waiting for my answer.

"I also-"

Suddenly, Yuigahama quickly grabbed hold of my hand, interrupting me. Holding it tightly. I was surprised and stared at her.

"Hikki." Yuigahama sadly smiled and slowly shook her head.

"Don't force yourself." Yuigahama moved her other hand and laid it squarely on the other side of my hand she was holding onto.

"You haven't completely moved on from her, have you?" Yuigahama said in a gentle kindly tone as she still smiled at me as tears started forming on the corner of her eyes once more.

I was immediately surprised by her statement. Maybe that's what's holding me back because I was still..

"It's obvious that you still love her, right Hikki?" Yuigahama took the words right off from my mouth.

I casted my eyes downwards, unable to respond to that. I wasn't fully sure if I still was, these past few days hadn't been clear to me..

"Then do you hate her?" Yuigahama simplify her question for me to answer it accurately.

There was no doubt, I should hate her for everything that she had done but why can't I? If not hate, then nothing at all, but I was unable to dispose or destroy any feeling towards her. All I did was contained it, that was slowly poisoning me, made me lost myself along the way.

"I thought so. Hikki, if you don't hate her then obviously you love her. There's your answer." Yuigahama chuckled forcedly.

"Yuigahama.."

She rubbed my hand that she was holding, trying to calm me down.

"Love and hate are powerful words Hikki. You can't say one of these words without truly mean it."

"Think, writhe and struggle."

I reacted very surprised to those words Yuigahama spoke.

"Weren't those your words Hikki? isn't that... what you're going through right now?" Yuigahama smiled as she asked me that.

I was so stupid that I kept thinking for an easy way out that I didn't notice I almost gave myself in to something I hated the most, superficiality relationship.

Solution that was served immediately on the platter was never right, and was not something...genuine.

Back then, there was something I desired for a long time.

I want something genuine.

That was my desire and a request to both Yukinoshita and Yuigahama.

Because if I had that, maybe I would... feel..

"I tried to make you happy Hikki, I tried but I can't seem to give you back your happiness."

"But you know what Hikki?"

"The only one, who can make you happy.. is you Hikki."

Her statement caused my mouth to open out of surprise.

"Remember what I told you that I won't wait for someone who won't go anywhere?"

Now Yuigahama was bringing up about back then during the cultural festival of Sobu High. Her words back then flashed on my mind.

"I said, I won't wait.. but I'll go instead."

"Maybe that's what you should do Hikki. Seek what your heart desire and then, you'll be happy." Yuigahama forcedly grinned.

She's right. Her words were true.

I was so selfish of my desire for something genuine; I let them do all the ground work while I did nothing but wait.

And I paid the price, suffered the consequence right now because of it.

I was too busy pitying myself, waiting for something to happened in my life that I didn't bother to take a step forward and seek it on my own.

I was so pathetic.

But not anymore.

"Yuigahama." I called her, with strength returned to my voice.

I slightly bowed my head to Yuigahama who startled a bit over it.

"Thank you."

She nodded and smiled at me in response. I know a thank you and mere words wasn't enough to express how truly grateful I was to have someone like Yuigahama, by my side and as someone close to me.

 _I'm really glad to have saved your dog, and met you in the process. I didn't expect things would turn out this way but I'm glad._

Something that was lost from me over these past few days, have now returned to me because of Yuigahama's words.

Now both my mind and path was clear.

I know what to do now.

And I have to seek for that.

Suddenly droplets of rain started falling. We were busy conversing we didn't notice the cloud on top of us.

"Ah it's raining." Yuigahama whined.

I immediately unzipped my hoody and handed to Yuigahama.

"Here cover yourself with this."

"But I have my hat." Yuigahama was being considerate for me.

"That won't be enough considering your outfit." I briefly pointed out her exposed skin.

"Shaddup! Fine I'll wear it, pervert!" Yuigahama shouted at me, and began wearing my hoody, covering herself underneath it. Yuigahama then gazed at me with a concerned look.

"But what about you Hikki?" Yuigahama worriedly look at me.

"It's just a light rain, I'll be fine. You want me to walk you?" I asked whether she wants me to accompany her to exit the park.

"Ah that's fine, I texted my mom earlier. She's probably waiting for me on the southern entrance. Thanks anyway Hikki."

"Ah okay then." I said, and Yuigahama began walking towards the stairs.

She stopped and turns around to face me before leaving. She smiled at my direction and waved her hand helplessly.

"Bye bye Hikki."

I made a small smile at her and waved my hand to her as well.

After we exchanged our farewell, Yuigahama was taking her leave from the summit first. Rain continued to drop on my exposed skin.

As Yuigahama turned to the opposite direction of me, there were droplets of water on the ground coming from where Yuigahama was standing. I could only assume that it was the rain. But...

She then said in a quiet yet trembling voice as if whispering as she walked down the stairs.

"Thank you Hikki.. for hearing me out. Now.. I can.."

* * *

 _...Finally, move on._

* * *

 **Next Chapter 5: There are lines even Haruno Yukinoshita can't cross.**

 **Please leave a review! thank you everyone!**


	6. There are lines even Haruno Yukinoshita

**Here you go guys!**

 **Sorry in advance for any error and I was bit in a rush so I think I miss out a few things, do leave a review!**

* * *

 **Chapter 5: There are lines even Haruno Yukinoshita can't cross.**

* * *

I've been sneezing quite a lot lately.

It was probably my exposure to the rain. Yesterday afternoon once Yuigahama left me after our activity at Satomi Park, I did nothing else but to go home as well since it was raining.

The rain dropped lightly at first but eventually it poured down heavily, it was quite unexpected and so I returned home soaking wet and my mom overreacted to my appearance. She was literally shouting at me. _At least it was better than being stared down with her eyes._

It was already around late afternoon and early evening of Saturday also the third day of my suspension. Despite that it's the weekend; Unfortunately, third year students have to attend a daily extra class every Saturday morning until lunch period for their upcoming exams in the future.

Classes should've ended a few hours ago, that's why I'm currently here and by here I was standing in front of the entrance of the high class tower apartment where Yukinoshita lives in. She should be home by now.

Running away from my problem won't solve things, so I decided to stop avoiding it and confront it head on. My self-being along with my resolve returned because of Yuigahama's words, she put me back to my senses; I don't know whether she did it intentionally or not but even so I was very grateful that she did.

There was a little sweat started forming around my forehead as I stared at the electronic bell in front of me, I could feel my hands shaking inside my pocket and my legs hesitated if I should step forward to ring the bell to Yukinoshita's apartment. _Why am I getting so worked up about?_

Regardless of my condition, I have to tell what I need to tell to Yukinoshita and move on. I have to end it myself.

So I breathed in some air, in an attempt to calm both mind and soul from its nervousness. As I breathed in once more, I ended up sneezing again along with my nostril started running with mucus. Despite that, I put on a serious expression, one that was filled with determination and resolve to settle the unfinished business I have with Yukinoshita, also to apologize for punching Hayama , as much as I hate to.

I gulped the saliva that formed inside my mouth then took a step forward, and reach out my hand to the bell. My hand that was slowly forward to the bell, paused itself for a moment. My whole body was trembling just by the thought of whether I should ring the bell or not. I felt like I was going to have a mental breakdown in any moment, but that didn't stop me as I forced my hand and finally rang the bell.

I let out a very, very deep breath after. _Boy oh boy! That's a relief! I finally did it!_ The tension I was experiencing earlier was instantly replaced with a feeling of relief when I rang the bell.

As I was catching my breath due to the nervousness, there seemed to be no one answering the bell. I stared at the speaker above the bell for a brief moment then rang the bell twice just to be sure.

I paused for a moment. Before I tried to ring the bell once more, the speaker gave off a buzzing noise indicating that my bell was answered. _What took her so long?_

[..Hello?] to my surprised, the bell was answered by a very familiar voice. It wasn't Yukinoshita but it was,

"Haruno-san?"

[Ehhh? Hikigaya? Is that you!?] She excitedly asked me through the buzzing noise of the small speaker.

"Yeah, it's me. Where's Yukinoshita?" Ignoring the simple introductory, I proceeded in asking for Yukinoshita.

[Ohhh? I am Yukinoshita, you're gonna have to be a little more specific there.] Haruno giggled as she teased me.

"Don't play dumb, You know who I mean."

[Your so slow Hikigaya. didn't you hear?]

I paused for a moment.

[She moved out...] Said Haruno as her teasing voice earlier turned serious immediately.

 _Moved out?_ I was very surprised upon hearing that. It was news to me. If she moved out from her apartment, then that must mean…

[I'm sure you already figured out where, huh, Hikigaya?] I remain silent as she continued to speak through the speaker.

I was dazed. Unable to grasp the situation.

Knowing Yukinoshita, the last place she wants to be was under one roof with her mother. If so why? Why did she move back to her mother? It just doesn't add up. I wanted to ask her, but I was hesitant.

[Kinda makes you wonder why huh?] Haruno calmly said to me.

[Why don't you come inside, so we can catch up on things.] As she said that, the automated door at the entrance automatically opened making a slight creaking noise as if it was from a horror movie. _Freaky…_

I paused myself for a moment to think, but..

"Fine."

I accepted and proceeded inside the building.

I paced ahead through the opened automatic door then closed again behind me. I approached the elevator and pressed the button for floor 15.

The elevator started ascending at a very nostalgic speed. The last time I was here was during the night after our activity at the white day festival, when me and Yukinoshita along with Hayama helped out Haruno back home, I've made myself clear before that it was a night I couldn't ever forget, the night when Haruno Yukinoshita cried. Also the night when, Yukinoshita….

Before I delved deeper in thought of what happened that night, I was interrupted by the opened elevator door indicating that I arrived to the designated floor. I soon forget what I was thinking and stepped outside of the lift and started walking, passing numerous plateless door.

As I arrived at the front door of Yukinoshita's apartment.. or more likely, Haruno's apartment. I exhaled softly before reaching out the intercom next to it with my finger.

The bell began playing its usual tune, but before it could finish, the door in front of me quickly opened which startled me.

"Hikigaya!" Haruno yelled with a wide smile, bursting out from the door instantly as she jumped herself to me and hugged me tightly.

"I miss you so much Hikigaya!" Haruno briefly said without even looking at my face as she began rubbing her cheek rapidly against my face. Well we didn't see each other for about a month so it'd makes sense but still..

She was hugging me tightly; I didn't know she had this kind of strength where I was having a hard time to breathe. There was no distance between our face and body, not even an inch. I could even feel the parts of her chest, she smells nice, comforting yet…

 _Too close.. too close!_

 _Let go of me!_

 _I need my personal space back immediately!_

 _Before my animal instinct lash out!_

All the sudden, I felt a sneeze was going to come so I turned my face away from her and sneezed loudly that echoed the corridor of doors, luckily each room in the building were sound proofed. Haruno immediately released me from her clutches.

"Ew, cover your mouth will you." Haruno gave me a looked of disgust. _How can I? When both my arms were tied up.._

I immediately panted, catching my breath.

"Oops, sorry. I guess I don't know my own strength." Haruno chuckled as she realized how tight she hugged moments ago. I don't know whether it was her strength or I was just that weak.

While I was taking a breather, Haruno stared at me still in front of the door outside her apartment room.

"You're late Hikigaya." Haruno said as she put up her usual devious smile at my direction.

"Oh? You were expecting my arrival?" I asked sarcastically.

"I guess you could say that, but I didn't expect you to be this late though…. Talk about cutting it short." Haruno replied to me.

The last phrase took me by surprise, what did she mean by that? Haruno turned her back on me.

"Come on in. We have so much to catch up on." Haruno sounded like she was giving me hints and started walking back in her apartment. I followed her from behind and closed the door behind me.

I couldn't make out her expression even though sometimes she puts up a false facial expression still I couldn't helped but feel troubled.

We moved in through the hallway, and then I immediately took my seat on the cream colored sofa in the living room. That was very, intruding of me but Haruno looked like she didn't mind though because at one point, this used to feel like home to me back then.

Haruno smiled at me, and went to the kitchen to bring some refreshment before we could discuss anything further on I supposed.

"Sorry for the mess." Haruno spoke out loud across the kitchen.

On the coffee table in front of me, laid numerous books and papers along with a closed laptop. It seemed she was studying, I'm surprised that she wasn't going out like she always used to. Back then, Haruno looked like she have a lot of free time in her hand.

"Since I knew you would come sooner or later, I kept something in the fridge just in case.. Ta-da!" Haruno yelled softly from the kitchen and showed me the can of MAX COFFEE!

I stared at her from where I was sitting, I wasn't feeling at least happy by the sight of it but I was a bit annoyed because..

 _Why did you have to put it in the fridge? Don't you know good coffee taste good when it's hot, especially my MAX COFFEE!_

In any case it's still MAX COFFEE, though I never drink a cold one, so I supposed I have to make do with it. Haruno walked in the living and handed my can of coffee, _damn that's cold! How long did she keep it in there?_

She took her seat next to me on the sofa, and just stared with at me with a blank expression as if she was inspecting me.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh it's just.. hmm. Ah! How's school?" Haruno changed the subject, it was obviously intentionally so she could bring up about that certain incident.

"So you heard about it too huh?" I nonchalantly drink my coffee which tasted even bitterer when it's cold, so all I did was forced myself to gulp it and prevent myself from making any kind of sour expression.

"Well, Hayato told me. Still that was very unexpected even for you."

 _Well it's true, it was unexpected consider my status and all. I pretty much surprised everyone and made them acknowledge my existence in a bad way._

"You're not mad?" I asked since she looked very calm about the topic at hand.

"Nope. Just very surprised that's all." Haruno let out a forced laughed as I sip through my can of coffee once more.

"Oh I see."

"Hey was it because you were jealous that Hayato won Yukino-chan?" Haruno started teasing me, but even if she's playing around there's always a hidden agenda behind it.

"Well not anymore." I replied her.

"Oh so you were jealous." Haruno made a teasing smile at my direction. _Tch, how stubborn._

I let out a deep sigh after.

"It's okay to be jealous, Hikigaya." She giggled again, but stopped immediately.

She turned her gaze away from me and began speaking with her usual piercingly cold tone.

"Well that's to be expected I guess…."

"… Since they only _looked_ like they're in love."

I was shocked with what I've heard as I stopped drinking my coffee and quickly gazed at her.

"Looked…like?" I felt like I was choking and these were the only words I was able to spat out.

"Hmm? You're surprisingly slower than usual Hikigaya."

That was because a lot happened over the course of this week. Things that were very unfamiliar to me, I couldn't grasp nor describe what it was at first, but a few people have helped me, slowly bit by bit putting the pieces together to my mystery puzzle. I was still not fully of who I was used to though, but as Hiratsuka-sensei said, I'm trying to balance the circumstances.

"Let's just skip the trivial matter, and get to the point." I told Haruno, and immediately went silent.

"Fine. They're engaged… well not officially yet." Haruno briefly answered. I was surprised by hearing that, I mean who wouldn't be?

It was quite early for those two to be engage though but still, there wasn't anything wrong with that..

"Well of course. They're in love after all." I said a bit concerned while Haruno immediately let out a sigh.

"Did you forget what I said earlier? And try not to interrupt me when I'm not finished yet." _Well sorry, it looked like you're done._

I silence myself from now on and listened until Haruno was finished.

"They only looked like they're in love but they're not. They're engaged because they're in an arranged marriage."Haruno immediately gazed at me as she said that.

My jaw dropped itself out of surprised.

"Arranged..marriage?" I could feel my hand that was holding onto my can of coffee slightly trembled.

"Yup, and you know how arranged marriage is.."

 _Of course I know how it is._

Arranged marriage is a marriage between two individuals arranged by either their parents or guardians. Regardless how they feel to one another, arranged marriage wasn't a marriage specifically out of any romantic emotions but it was mainly forced due to specific reasons.

Back then Yukinoshita did say that her mother wishes for a lasting relationship with the Hayamas', so an arranged marriage between Yukinoshita and Hayama would be a probable move to seal that deal. But analytically, I suspect it was mainly business.

As from a business perspective, if they're to be wed then Hayama would most likely inherit Yukinoshita's father's company, that being an only child and the Yukinoshita only have two daughters.

The thought of abusing your child, forcing your will unto them… _is just wrong._

"It was an agreement a long time ago." Haruno inhaled and exhaled a deep breath before continuing further explaining the situation.

" Yukino-chan was forced to agree to it by mom, but Yukino-chan then mustered up her courage and confronted mom suggesting that she should at least live a life of freedom before getting engaged once she entered her third year of high school. My mom was against it, while dad showed some consideration and agrees to it."

"That's what I heard anyways from our servants."

"They'll get married once they graduated from University."

Even so,

"Still, wouldn't.. wouldn't they come to love each other as time pass by?" I don't know what was I saying, the words slipped out of my mouth unintentionally.

"What?" Haruno looked surprise by my question and started gazing at me. She looked like she was glaring at me, all I did was quietly pinched my fingers together. _Why did I even ask such a question?_

"Hikigaya. I don't think that's possible since Yukino-chan…" Haruno made a small smile at me before she continues.

"..Already have someone she loves." Once Haruno said that,

All of the sudden, the events that take place during the night of the white day at balcony of this apartment suddenly flashed in my head. The night when Yukinoshita…confessed to me.

"Then why.. why didn't Yukinoshita just go against it? Why did she give in? it's unlike her to just… just give up." I stammered a bit with my words, I was a bit shaken, hesitated, and anxious whether I should know the truth behind her reasons.

"Honestly, I couldn't tell why. I mean we rarely see or talk to each other nowadays. The only time we see each other was during our daily meetings with Hayato and his family every Sunday back home." Haruno briefly answered me. _Ohh? Did she intentionally give that information away?_

"But tomorrow will be different, tomorrow they will discussed their final terms before officially engage both Yukino-chan and Hayato." Haruno gave away yet another information.

I could care less about that information, what I really wanted to know was,

"Why lie about it? Why couldn't she just tell me?"

"Then what Hikigaya? Would she expect you to just stand around and not do anything about it?" Haruno briefly said as she stared at me.

Her statement made my eyes casted down to the floor.

"Of course not." Haruno said then averted her gaze away from me.

"Heh, she used the worst possible method huh." I whispered to myself.

Now I kind of grasped a little how both Yukinoshita and Yuigahama felt back then, when I made the fake confession to Ebina-san just to save the Tobe from the pain of rejection, but still ended up sacrificing all self-respect of my individuality, my morality, dignity and self-worth.

I may not mind taking the blame as long as it provided a satisfying result but, to them, it probably did. I realized how insensitive I was, I did it because I'm already used to the thought of me being alone but I was wrong, I was never aware there were people who cared about my well-being.

I used the worst possible method just to give the people their solutions, satisfaction but ended up hurting the people around me who cared for me.

"Also maybe it's because…she's afraid, that she might end up like me." Haruno muttered as she sadly smiles.

"Huh?" I was a bit confused.

"I was set as an example of what would happen if anyone dare crosses my mother."

"How so?" I anxiously asked her.

"I had…someone before." Haruno hesitantly replied me.

"Huh!?" I was surprised by hearing this sudden news; even Haruno can fall in love? I mean how could anyone put up with her? It's impossible I must say. Though I admire the man's bravery to be with a tyrant like her.

"I may not look like it Hikigaya, but even I can fall in love. Used to anyway.." Haruno casted down her eyes. It was the first time I see Haruno like this, I was a bit bewildered by it.

"Used to?"

Haruno started fiddling with the ring she always wore on her finger of her right hand. _So that must be from…_

"We were so young, so hectic, so in love in our little fantasy world that we forgot about reality and everything around us." Haruno made a sad smile as she explained.

"What happened?" I asked as I stared at her.

She let out a weak sigh, before answering.

"Let's just say, our relationship was…compromised."

Her answer alone was enough to let me know how terrifying and capable her mother can be. I did nothing nor say anything further but sipped through my coffee again.

Silence made its way to us, just for a brief moment before she continued speaking.

"Because of what happened, I became more obedient to mom and followed every instruction that she gave me from there on. I was afraid really afraid, that I was force to be someone who I'm not for a long time just to prevent anything like that from repeating itself."

I silently listened to her mumbling, it was very unusual for Haruno to open herself up to me. I couldn't helped but found it very suspicious and so..

"Why are you telling me this?" I gritted my teeth quietly.

"Huh? It's just.. I thought you would want know and- "

"Wrong." I quickly interrupted and began running my distorted mouth.

"You're telling me this because you expect me to do something about Yukinoshita. Trying to use pitiness to convey me in doing the dirty work while you're too afraid to get your hands dirty."

"Hikigaya, that's not-"

"Oh that's exactly what it is, if so why are you even here?"

After I asked that, she immediately flinched, she looked like she was choking on her own words.

"Back then you used to go out all the time from day to night, it's not because you have a lot of free time in your hand was it? No, it's because..you wanted to avoid being from your mother's grasp as much as possible. Am I wrong?"

Haruno made a small a smile while her eyes were still on the floor.

"You noticed that huh? It's scary how you're always right about everything." Haruno let out a dry laugh.

"Not everything. Let me ask again, why are you here and not there?"

Haruno quickly gazed at me with a shocking expression.

"Why are you not there, defying your mother and defending your sister against your mother's will?"

When I asked that, her expression was immediately filled with guilt. My hand clenched itself and began trembling.

"So you're just going to let your sister go through that? After everything you've done antagonizing her, she still forgives you yet.."

" ..You're not going to make up for your mistake? You're just going to let her slowly become a puppet like you?"

Haruno lifted her gazed at me and looked hesitated. It was really a rare sight to see Haruno so helpess and powerless.

"You.. you don't understand. It's just.. there are lines I can't cross.."

"Oh I understand. We both are older siblings remember so I completely get the situation."

I let out a sigh before continuing.

" If my sister were in your sister's position, I would do everything, everything it takes to free her from being chained up in such situation. Even if it means losing something from myself."

Haruno flinched and then frowned while casting down her averted gaze once more.

Indeed if it were Komachi, I wouldn't just stand around and watched her suffer through that. I'd rather take the bullet than letting Komachi experience that kind of agony.

But truth was, I only used Komachi name as an excuse.

"There are no lines to begin with, there are only choices. You choose to stand up for you sister or just hide here and let your sister rot."

"But if you choose choice number two, then I don't know if it's right to even call you an older sister."

Haruno clenched her fist on her lap and lightly bit her lips in silence.

I stood up from my seat to leave the apartment, I turned my back on her but before I walk away from Haruno, there's one last thing I needed to say..

"The Haruno Yukinoshita I know was someone who isn't afraid to do what she wants and always get what she wants."

"I thought we're a lot alike, but knowing what you really are right now, disgust me…So don't expect anything from me."

It wasn't my problem nor place to deal with other's family issue.

And with those last words to Haruno, I walked to the hallway and exited the room, leaving Haruno in silence. I closed the door behind me; I was still dazed by the shocking news about Yukinoshita and Hayama.

A sneeze was let out from me yet again.

My legs were trembling for some reason, sweat was forming around my forehead and my breathing became unsteady. I leaned against the closed door behind me, softly slammed my head against it and slowly slid down to the floor, unable to stand any longer.

So in the end, I couldn't do anything at all.

I gazed outside through the window by the end of the corridor. It was already dark. It felt like a short conversation between me and Haruno.

All I could think of was the topic about Yukinoshita from Haruno.

 _Was she referring to me?_

Yuigahama's words yesterday at the summit of Satomi Park slowly made its way back to my head.

I remained on the floor in the cold spacious, spotless empty corridor with the terrifying knowledge of unable to do anything further on.

Was that it?

It was all for nothing?

All my struggling,

All my thinking

And my resolve,

Led me to nothing but a dead end.

How pathetic. I came here to confront my problems yet I decided to avoid it in the end. It's not that I wanted to, but after hearing the sudden news about Yukinoshita's arranged marriage with Hayama, these changes things. There wasn't any place for me to intrude their business anymore. It was a family matter, after all.

I doubt Haruno would do anything about it. The reason why she expects me to do so, because she was also at a dead end. We all have our limits anyway, and this matter wasn't something we can't simply solve like your everyday problem in society. It's an agreement between two elders of the family after all.

 _I guess there are lines, we just can't cross. Even for Haruno Yukinoshita too.._

 _How the mighty have fallen_ , was what I'd like to refer Haruno and also… a coward.

I chuckled.

 _That Haruno, she really did a number on my head.._

Why did she have to bring that up?

"Tch.."

"..Coward."

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

It's been sometime since I returned home.

It was already nearly half past eleven when I did. I sank myself on the sofa of the lightless living room. The only source of light was the light of the moon piercing through the windows of the house from outside.

Still it was dark; I did not see but only hear sounds giving off from a specific appliance. The sound of the clock's long hand that was ticking and ticking on the wall, it was loud than I remembered. The sound of the escaped droplets of water from the closed water tap and onto the sink.

My parents and Komachi already had their dinner and locked away in their rooms for their slumber. Komachi probably left me something to eat in the fridge but I didn't have any appetite to eat at all.

Even though its spring but the room felt pretty chilly, I don't know whether it was the air trapped in the room or just me. But luckily my conditions kept me warm. My head felt heavy; it was pretty much hazy as the clouded night sky. I was probably still dazed after my visit and conversation with Haruno.

Suddenly, I let out out a loud sneeze. I should've covered my mouth, it was pretty loud that it would wake everyone in the house but fortunately it seem like it didn't.

I started delving into my thoughts while still lying on the sofa, I need to established myself that I need not to intrude Yukinoshita's business any further but somewhere inside of me wanted to.

Even so, I can't just intrude a family matter, _but still if I don't.._

I was unable to come up with anything to finish that sentence, if I don't then what? Will I be sad? Depressed? Broken? Regret for the rest of my life. These were such silly feelings that were impossible for a creature such as myself to go through.

The question was, why did it cross my mind to feel such feelings? I asked myself that to which I was afraid that the answer might be the one I suspected. Was it because I was still in love with Yukinoshita?

Haruno mentioned directly to me, giving me a hint that Yukinoshita already have someone she loves. Every time I think about that sentence over and over, a number of scenes flashed into my mind repeatedly.

The night when Yukinoshita professed her love to me.

The call from Yukinoshita last month where the degradation of my individuality started in the first place.

And also,

The afternoon, yesterday, when Yuigahama was conversing me regarding love and hate, how you can't truly say these type of words without truly mean it..

I don't know whether I should do something, should I chased after her? Even though I know it was already inevitable who she will ended up with in the end as their family already arranged her to be with Hayama.

I was torn apart between whether I should forget about the matter at hand or do something about it to satisfy this urge.

No.

It wasn't because I need to satisfy my urge but maybe because there was something else. Something strong, something indescribable and something..

I desired.

What I was worried about was the terrifying unknown result if I do take action, if I dare intrude into their family matter.

Knowing how capable her mother was after Haruno revealed what she did to her previous relationship, the aftermath would likely be she'll keep me away from her daughter as far as possible by any means necessary. The distance between me and Yukinoshita will only be widened and the wall will become even thicker.

Worst case scenario will probably be-

"Hachiman?"

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

My ongoing thought was soon interrupted by a voice emerged from behind me through the darkness.

"Mom?" despite how dark it was, her figure was still visible yet her voice alone was enough to tell me it was her.

"Why are you still awake? More importantly what are you doing here in the dark? Just let me switch on the-"

"No. I mean, I need this right now." I quickly stopped her from switching on the light, because I didn't want her to see my current state along with the pathetic expression I was making.

"As you wish then." My mom obliged my request and started walking to my direction. I scooted over as she took her seat next to me on the sofa.

The atmosphere around us was filled with silence for a moment.

The silence breaks when she suddenly let out an awfully deep loud sigh.

"What?" I asked as I stared at her dark figure.

"Ohh, it's just today. It's been a very, very depressing day at work. I'm probably the only one having a bad day at work and all." My mom let out another sigh after. I could tell she was really depress, but I can relate to that.

"Well if it makes you feel better, I'm having a bad day myse-" _wait! Crap I fell for it!_

"Oh so something is troubling you." My mom cheerfully said in the pitch black of the living room. I could feel her smiling triumphantly next to me.

I sighed after.

"Guess you got me there." I said admitting my defeat.

"So what's troubling you?" My mom asked vigorously. Knowing her, there was no way to avoid that question or try to lie my way out of it, and so I took advantage of the darkness and quietly stood up in an attempt to sneak away from her.

As I took a step away, suddenly, a grabbing sensation held onto to my right hand tightly.

"Just where do you think you're going?" My mom coldly asked as she noticed me.

I was quickly pulled back down on the sofa along with my head forcefully laid down on my mom's lap. All I could see was the ceiling and my mom's dark figure face on top of me. I was unable to see her expression visibly.

"Hachiman.."

She then laid her hand squarely on top of my forehead, her hand twitched when it did.

"You're burning up..." My mom softly whispered.

"S-Sorry." I instinctively apologized to her.

She began stroking my hair gently. It felt nice, I was feeling at peace. All the depression, confusion and conditions I felt moments ago just disappeared by a stroke of my hair from my mom's fingertip.

"So?" my mom continued asking what was troubling me. I didn't say anything, I was hesitant so all I did was silent myself.

"Hachiman, at times like this, when you're troubled by something... the best course of action is to talk things out." My mom's voice was gentle and kind as she said that and she stroked my hair once more.

She was right though, I hesitated whether I should tell her fully about what's happening right now about Yukinoshita but it wasn't my business to tell but still keeping things in the dark won't help me any less. I guess the least I could tell her was the outline of the situation and try not to reveal as much detail as possible also to remain Yukinoshita's identity anonymous.

"I have a friend…"

"Mhm. Go on." My mom let me continued, and so I did.

"…Who is in a tight spot right now by a decision made by her parents."

"She never wanted to be in that spot to begin with." I assumed the idea that Yukinoshita never did have any intention to be where she was right now, but she was forced to no less by her parents, especially her mother.

"I have neither right nor place to intrude on a decision made by her parents, still.."

Truth was, I don't even know if Yukinoshita even wanted my help to begin with. The reason why she never said anything in the first place was still unknown but it was clearly that she never wanted me to intrude, but still leaving her be felt wrong to me, that's why…

I clenched my trembling fist before continuing on.

"..I'm confused. I don't know whether to help her or not… because if I do, I might... lose her... And if I don't do anything, I would still lose her…" without realizing, my voice was trembling as I explained further of the situation.

I was torn apart between two choices that might produce the same outcome. It was pointless to act if the outcome will be the same as not doing anything at all, yet I still questioned myself as to why am I even arguing. If I tried to avoid the situation, I would lose Yukinoshita but if I do take action consider how capable her mother was and what happened with Haruno, I would still lose Yukinoshita. So what was the point then?

My mom paused and seemed to think for a brief moment before making any response.

"It sounds like you care deeply for this person…" my mom briefly said.

"If so, then help her.."

I was surprised by her response.

"Huh?" _Even though the outcome will remain the same? Even though I might lose her_ anyway _?_

"If you don't do anything and remain seated, then what kind of friend are you?"

"…." I froze; I never stopped to consider that. Considering how I truly feel about Yukinoshita and also her feelings towards me.

"If you truly care about this person, then help her Hachiman. Despite the result, just by being there for her let's her know how you truly care for her and by being there, it'll give her a little bit of happiness in her current situation, but it's enough to ease both her and your heart that you tried your best to help her in any way you can. It's better than not do anything and regret it later on." My mom explained, and began stroking my hair again.

Her words filled me in silence.

"There's no doubt you would lose her if you don't do anything, but, you did say you **_might_** lose her if you take action right?"

 _Where is she going with this?_

"That proves that the result is unconfirmed and remains uncertain. Regardless of the probability on what outcome it might produce…You still won't know the real outcome unless you try. Right?" My mom giggled sweetly.

So that's what she meant.

I did say the word 'might' because I was relying on probabilities to depict the outcome. The probability of the risk of me losing Yukinoshita by any course of action I take was quite high.

Still, regardless of the risk, that did not change the fact that I never truly know the real outcome, how things will turn out if I try.

If there's one thing I learned back then during my entire time in the service club, was that not everything was written in cold hard logic. Not everything goes the way as logic predicted to be, as Hiratsuka-sensei once told me, feelings and emotions can broke all boundaries and possibilities.

My desired for something genuine a long time ago when I said it out loud in front of Yukinoshita and Yuigahama was the hard proof of it.

So I have to at least try, and reach out to Yukinoshita despite what outcome it might turn out.

Also, because there was something else too. Something I've kept inside for quite a while.

"Fine then, if that's how it is. Guess I have no choice." Finally, I've made up my mind.

"Being shy now?" my mom teased me as she giggled again.

"Still though mom, aren't you supposed to at least go against me? I mean for trying to barge in a family issue.."

"Nope." My mom instantly answered. _So nonchalantly!_

"That's practically bad parenting, you know…" I briefly said.

"It's not as bad as forcing your will upon your child. Wouldn't you say?" _she's got a point there.._

She slowly strokes my hair again, and let out a sigh.

"Honestly, I don't think there is such thing as a bad parent. Maybe they just think everything they do, every choice they make was for what's best for their child but it wasn't, but that doesn't mean they're bad at all because still, they do it for their child's sake because they cared for them, they love them just as much."

"A parent who doesn't do so much of anything to their child is a parent who doesn't care nor love their child."

"Maybe your friend's parents just lose their way while doing that." I can practically relate what my mom said. Emotion can be overwhelming just as Hiratsuka-sensei said. It can make you lose sight of any morale. Maybe that's what it is with Yukinoshita's parent.

"And you think barging into a family matter is what's best?" I asked nonchalantly.

"Hachiman, like every other parent, all I wanted was what's best for my child and if you think that's the best thing to do to help out your friend then I won't stop you."

"Because…"

Before my mom could continue, the cloud in the night sky started clearing up and the light of the moon started to extend further in parts of the house. Everything that was covered by darkness started to become visible by the moon's extending light, when it did, my mom's face illuminate on top of me.

"A child's happiness is everything that a parent could ever wish. Seeing my beloved son smile happily is all I could ever dream of." My mom made a sweet warming smile with her moist eyes behind her specs.

It's strange. When she's glaring, everything just turns to stone but when she smile, every sadness, depression and any negative thought did not matter anymore. I guess I could say, mom's smile was her greatest trait and her glaring snake eyes was her greatest weapon.

Suddenly, without realizing, her face quickly got closer and she pressed her lips against my right cheek.

I immediately pulled myself up from her lap, made a sit posture on the sofa and quickly putting some distance between us.

"W-What the heck was that for!?" I stammered as I asked her, I could feel myself flushed real hard; my cheek was hot red out of embarrassment. _I knew it! She's a son-con! A complete son-con!_

"What? Can't a mom give her child a kiss on the cheek?" My mom made a teasing smile at my direction.

"Pfft, I'm not a little boy anymore mom." I said, as I wiped my right cheek of any essence that still lingers.

"Age does not change the fact that, you will always be my little boy, Hachiman." My mom warmly responded to me with a smile. _So cute…_

I was still a bit embarrassed, so I pulled out my phone to further suppress this embarrassment by fiddling myself with my phone. It was a habit I picked up from Yuigahama. _She's really growing in me huh?_

When I did reached out my phone, there was a message on the screen. The message was received ten minutes ago. I guess I was too busy with myself to even realize my phone vibrated in my pocket. I wondered who it was from.

"I'm heading up now. Be sure to check the locks on the windows and doors again before heading up, okay?" My mom tapped on my shoulder before standing up from her seat and walked away.

I didn't bother making any response to her as I opened my text message to read the contents of who it was from. When I opened it, the first thing I saw was the name of the sender on top of the border. I was surprised; it was a text from Haruno Yukinoshita.

And so I began reading the contents of her message, what she sent me seemed like an address. I smirked to myself and to Haruno's message.

 _Heh, how stubborn. I thought I told her to not expect anything from me. She's persistent. I guess she somehow saw this coming._

As usual, Haruno foresaw how things will turn out for me, which was my decision to help out Yukinoshita.

But still, the location of this place base on the address, it seemed a ride by monorail was out of the question.

I turned my head around behind me and saw my mom walking towards the stairs.

"Hey mom."

She paused her movement and gazed at me.

"Hmm?"

I was still a bit embarrassed, so I scratched my head and looked away while trying to speak to her.

"Could I ask a favor from you?" I reluctantly asked her still looking away.

"Sure." My mom kindly accepted.

I let out a sigh of relief before telling her what I needed. I stared at her strongly with my dead eyes full of determination and resolve as I spoke, but ended up sneezing again.

"God bless you." My mom briefly said to me.

 _That was embarrassing, and here I was acting all cool for a moment. But..._

"Tomorrow…"

"Hm?" my mom tilted her head.

"…I need a ride."

* * *

 **Next: Memorandum**

 **Next Chapter 6: The gather at the Yukinoshita manor.**

 **Thanks for reading! Do leave a review!**


	7. Memorandum

**Sorry for the errors and please leave a review :D!**

* * *

 **Memorandum**

* * *

How does one obtain obedience?

Perhaps taking their favorite toys away would do so. But it doesn't necessarily have to be toys. What I value was my books.

By taking something of value from an individual, one would obtain obedience.

Yes perhaps it would.

There was a living proof of it when I was very little,

But it wasn't a mere object that was taken away but it was something with many definition of it, one would be

Something genuine.

The same word that was spoken out loud on the verge of tears in front of me by a person whom I would never expect to hear those illogical and nonsensical words leaving from that mouth of his.

His desire slowly taught me what it means to be genuine itself, the sense of care, understanding, valuation and also, eventually..

..unexpectedly..

Love.

But, like every love story

There's always an ending.

Endings.

They are both inevitable and essential.

I wondered in an amountful curiosity when I did what I did even though I never have any intention of doing so.

I felt shameless and selfish of what I did to the point I wished myself to be cease to exist from this world.

Even so,

I never expected such things to happen in these two years of privilege. It was like a wild ride on the roller coaster.

We think twice before trying out the ride,

We writhe once it slowly move forward and,

We struggle on our seats as it gradually ascend and descend from the climax, but

In the end, we had fun, I was happy to be able to experience such ride with the very few people in my little circle.

The happiest moment of my joyful ride was the leaving of the short but strong words from my lips that genuinely entered his ear and hopefully, his heart.

I may not know how things will turn out, but sadly I know how it will end.

As much as I want to flip the pages for a next chapter, there's always an end to it no matter how much I don't want such beautiful piece to end.

My only regret was the anguish I've put him through, by turning his greatest desire into its opposite.

A lie.

Now I am no different than anyone else in his eyes. The eyes that's slowly rotten by the lies of this world.

Yet,

Just by still having this book I treasured in my hand,

Able to read through it repeatedly as I flip the pages over and over,

Even though I know how the story will end,

Was enough for me.

* * *

 **Next chapter 6: The gather at Yukinoshita manor.**

 **I know it's short but thanks for reading it! hope you understand through it.**

 **Please leave a review!**


	8. The gather at the Yukinoshita manor

**Sorry for the late update. It was longer than I anticipated. Do take your time in reading and understanding. Sorry for any error in advance.**

 **Please leave a review btw :D**

* * *

 **Chapter 6: The gather at the Yukinoshita manor.**

* * *

It was already half past twelve in the following mid-day and also the fourth day of my suspension. _Really, why do I constantly remind myself of that?_

Me and my mom left the house straight away after having our lunch with Komachi, my little sister did not join on our trip which I'm glad that she didn't while my dad was attending a business trip outside of the district of Chiba even though it was Sunday, such as the life of a corporate slave.

We were going to Yukinoshita's house by my mom's scarlet Honda N-One mini car, it was a business car to be frank also because since the address seemed to tell us Yukinoshita's home was located on the outskirt near of Chiba city, and there were no monorail tracks further on there. The estimated time of arrival would likely be an hour from now.

"Seat belt." My mom checked my safety.

"R-Right." I obediently fastened my seat belt.

Without any further ado, my mom activated her GPS and typed the following address from my text message from Haruno. Once she's done, she immediately started the engine of the car and began driving off away from our house and on route to Yukinoshita's house.

After a while of silence in the car and turning, crossing numerous junctions according to the GPS, my mom pulled up the lever of her car to halt itself at the red light of the traffic light, I did nothing but rested my chin on my hand while staring at the scenery of the city outside the entire time.

"Hachiman. You're sweating…" My mom glanced at me.

"Am I?" I reached my hand out around my forehead to check if I was, and I really was sweating without noticing.

"You know, we could do this some other time.." My mom suggested with a concerned expression on her face as she gazed at me with worried looking eyes behind the lenses of her glasses. _She's right, but…_

"No, I need to do this today. Sorry."

My mom nodded and immediately silence filled the car once more. I realized I wasn't in any condition to do this, if there was any other day then I would've rested today instead but there wasn't…

According to the information that comes along with the address from Haruno's text last night. The Hayamas' will meet the Yukinoshitas' around lunch time at their home, but we were planning to go there after lunch period since I have no intention to interrupt them having their meals. Today will be crucial as both Yukinoshita and Hayama's parents will discuss their final terms of their agreement before officially engage both their child into an arranged marriage.

So there won't be another day than today. If only I had gone to Yukinoshita's apartment and stumbled upon Haruno a bit early than yesterday, maybe I could've avoid this kind of situation, still it was cutting it short by a day, my timing couldn't be more perfect I guessed.

The traffic on the road of Chiba city was less than usual, maybe because people were going somewhere on Sundays. My mom drove the car at an average speed, even so this car of hers was so slow that even a bicycle could surpassed it with no effort at all, it'll probably changed our estimated time of arrival from an hour to two or maybe even three hours, and we can't have that can we?

"Speed up mom." I hastily said to her.

"Safety first son, safety." My mom preached me.

"But the road's practically empty!" I complained further on.

My mom let out somewhat an irritated sigh.

"Even so, anything can happen on the road, you know." My mom gave me somewhat a stare looking like she's trying to remind me of something and waited for a response.

I stared back at her, trying to figure out what she meant but then I manage to recall what happened that made her give that statement.

"Well…when you put it that way…"

I can't really argue with her statement, not after what happened during the start of my first year of high school, where Yuigahama's dog was somehow lose on the road, at the same time came Yukinoshita's speeding limousine and unexpectedly I jumped in, save Yuigahama's dog, got hit by Yukinoshita's limousine in the process, ended up in the hospital for a week and as a result, became a full fledge loner.

So her statement was valid, anything really can happen in the road.

Suddenly I feel myself being slightly pushed back to my seat; it seems the speed of the car was gradually increasing. I noticed my mom switched gears of the car while I wasn't looking.

"Good. At least you get it. That's why always be prepared for the unexpected. Remember that." My mom rambled at me while her gazed was focusing on the road.

I pondered for a moment with the last few words she said while gazing outside at the passing speeding scenery of the city. Suddenly something triggered my mind as if I remembered something.

"Hey mom, could you take me somewhere first?" I made a request to my mom while sitting next to the driver's seat.

"Sure." She accepted and waited for my directions and so I pointed out the direction of my desired location.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

It's been sometime since we're on the road around the city. Me and my mom didn't exchange much words in the car, so all we did was listen to the radio. Honestly I preferred the peace of silence rather than listening to the rambling news radio but my mom was the one who picked this radio station for some unknown reason.

Before we were on route to Yukinoshita's house, I had to ask my mom to take a little detour. Once again, my mom had reminded me of something important. Since I was going to barge in as an uninvited or an unwanted guest if that matter, it was important that I had to make preparation on what's to come.

I wasn't very confident enough if I could solve the issue all alone on my own, plus I was never truly the kind of person who has any conviction since I commonly doubt myself sometimes but hey at least I tried to act confident or speak negatively about stuff so in any case I was the type of person who reeks pessimism.

That's why; I need all the help I can get.

That's why, I need her. But still, _why isn't she answering her phone?_

I texted her and even tried to call her phone but with no response. _Of all times, why does it have to be today?_

Suddenly the car immediately slowed down.

"Is this it Hachiman?" My mom asked while gazing at the certain familiar building. I checked to see if it was.

"Yup, this is the place." I briefly answered her as we arrived correctly to the place I needed to be first.

My mom slowly parked the car across the street from it.

We arrived to the complex building apartment where Yuigahama lived. I needed Yuigahama because of her social interactive skills along with her ability to read the mood and also her ability to comfort the atmosphere when things will get intense since we're about to barge in uninvited, so of course those two family will probably be pissed and it'll be up to Yuigahama to try and cool things down. I wouldn't even if I wanted to, it won't be nearly as effective as Yuigahama consider my appearance and all, and they probably won't even give me the chance to talk and just proceeded in kicking me out straightaway.

But that wasn't just the only reason why I needed Yuigahama, not only because of her abilities but also she's the only person, whom Yukinoshita sees as a friend, and there was no doubt that Yuigahama would still looked at Yukinoshita as her best friend, despite everything what Yukinoshita did to me and ended up hurting Yuigahama along the way. Maybe if I explained to her Yukinoshita's given current situation, it would help her dropped any bitterness towards Yukinoshita for these past few days. Even so, I trust that Yuigahama won't give her friendship with Yukinoshita up that easily such as myself.

For that reason alone, Yuigahama needed to be a part of this as well. Not just for my sake but as a friend to Yukinoshita.

"Wait here, it won't be long." My mom nodded to my instruction to stay put in the car. As I got out of the car, the flowing scent of fresh air relaxes me compare to the artificial air of the ac I've been breathing in inside the car.

I crossed the street and approached the apartment. I began making my way to the stair and started walking up. Who knew walking all the way to 7th floor would be somewhat tiring maybe because unlike Yukinoshita's apartment, this apartment doesn't have a lift, makes sense though, this was your typical average apartment just like Yuigahama, while Yukinoshita's was of high class for someone as her standard.

While I was walking up the stairs, I tried once more to call Yuigahama and yet again, she's not picking up her phone. I was a bit bewildered; it was unlike Yuigahama to leave her phone from her clutches.

As I arrived to the designated floor, I panted and rested myself for a bit by respiring the air around me. Once I'm done resting, I slowly walked to the door of Yuigahama's apartment and rang the doorbell. Murmuring and steps could be heard behind the closed door in front of me. The steps got closer and louder as the door began unlocking itself, and the one who opened it was,

"Hello hello!"

"Good afternoon Yuigahama-san." I slightly bowed my head in front of Yuigahama's mother.

"Ah! Hikki-kun! How are you? Please come in." She said cheerfully while showing her kind gesture to me, but I didn't have time to come in and chat.

"Thanks but sorry, I'm looking for Yuigahama, she's not answering her phone." I remained outside as I asked her mother where her daughter was currently. Seeing that Yuigahama wasn't the one answering the door and there were no boisterous voice could be heard in the house only means that she's either asleep or she wasn't currently here.

"Ah Yui, She took Sable for a walk not so long ago. I guess she must've forgotten her phone." Mrs. Yuigahama let out a dry laugh as she wryly smiled at my direction. _Forgot? That's unlike her to forget her precious phone but at the same time is so like her to forget something so important…_

"But I think you can catch up to her if you go straight ahead from where you came in on the road. It's not that far, she'll make a U-turn back home once she finished walking Sable." Mrs. Yuigahama briefly informed me.

"Okay, thanks… oh if you don't mind, I'll be borrowing your daughter for a while." I asked her mother's permission before taking Yuigahama with me. Seeing that Yuigahama left her phone, and probably won't even remember her own mother's number even if she tried borrowing my phone, so there was no way for her to contact her mother to inform her of where she would be if I took her. Her mother would obviously be worried sick. This was why I'm informing her now.

"Ah, sure. As long as she's with Hikki-kun then there's no problem at all" Mrs. Yuigahama warmly laughed and smiled to me as she granted my permission so with that, I bowed my head to her and quickly head down the stairs to return to my mom's car.

"Well?" My mom asked loudly from her car across the street which startled me a bit. I shook my head only indicating that Yuigahama wasn't home and my mom nodded in response.

"But I think we can catch up to her if we go straight ahead that way." I said as I walked crossing the streets and towards her car.

"Fine. Hop in."

I entered the car once more after I informed my mom where Yuigahama might went, and so she started off her engine again and pulled up the lever as she drove off straight ahead.

I began turning my eyes left and right to search for a girl walking with her dog as we slowly drove down the narrow road of the street. _Ugh, where is she?_

My hands began tapping itself on my knees indicating that I was getting impatient, as time was wasted. Suddenly, in front of us on the left path of the street with her back facing us as she continued walking on the pavement, was a girl wearing a red hoody with white knee length casual short pants on, walking in a pair of pink flippers alongside a barking energetic light brown fur dog and she had a bun style hairdo so there was no doubt the girl fit the description of Yui Yuigahama.

I quickly rolled down the car window of my seat and called out to her, and my mom gradually decreased the speed of the car and stopped the moving car.

"Yuiga!"

She quickly startled by my sudden loud voice calling out her name that she almost jumped from the pavement she was walking on.

"Hikki!?" Yuigahama with a confused expression started walking quickly towards the car, and slowly approached it.

"Yuiga." I called her name once more vigorously that she flinched.

"Y-Yes?"

"Get in."

I quickly got out of the car and proceeded walking towards her. Yuigahama's confused expression quickly goes blank and immediately surprised.

"Ehhh!? What are you-"

"Just get in." I briefly said to her as I tugged on her sleeve and tried to drag her towards the car. Yuigahama quickly went 'Uwaaaaaa!' by my action.

"Are you kidnapping me!? S-S-Stop or I'll call the cops!" Yuigahama overreacted as usual. Luckily no one was around to witness the scene, well except my mom of course but she knows I was only messing around.

"Oh? Go ahead try calling them. Oh wait, you forgot your phone. Idiot." I taunted her sarcastically to which she immediately checked her pockets for her phone and she look surprised.

"Ahh! My phone!" I couldn't help but secretly made a smirk around my face just by looking at her so defeated.

Suddenly I heard a loud number of coughs made its way to my ear coming from inside the car behind me; I reflexively turned my head around and looked over to the source of the coughs. My mom cleared her throat and then pointed her index finger at her watch to me from her car, reminding me what we're supposed to do. _Right… I guess I got a little carried away…_

"Yuigahama." I strongly called her and made her flinch for a moment.

"Yes Hikki?" Yuigahama listened reluctantly waiting for me to speak out.

"Yu-Yukinoshita…needs…us." I stammered, usually I would use logical explanation to describe that Yukinoshita was in a troubling situation, but words like these was enough to make Yuigahama understand how important it was.

"What? What's going on Hikki?" Yuigahama hesitantly asked for a specific explanation.

"We're wasting time here Yuigahama, let's just get in the car. We're going to Yukinoshita." I briefly said to her and proceeded in entering the car and closed the door while my window was still rolled down.

"Yeah sure but-"

"I'll explain later Yuigahama, for now just get in." I quickly interjected her.

"No, I mean… what about…" Yuigahama didn't continue on and just pointed her index finger towards the ground, I was confused and looked over the cord she was holding on that was strapped on her dog, Sable.

"Woof!" The dog made a rapid breathing while wagging out its tongue. _Oh right, I completely forgot about her dog… still we have no time to return it to her house._

And so I stared at my mom, giving her a look that said 'Can we bring him as well?' since we had no time to make a U-turn.

My mom stared back at me looking annoyed, and pouted for a moment then she shifted her gazed to Yuigahama who had a moist eyes with a concerned look on her face, my mom then slowly shifted her stares from her to the dog that was on Yuigahama's arms who was giving my mom a cute puppy eyes while barking cutely.

My mom let out a deep sigh.

"Very well." My mom permitted Yuigahama to bring her dog along in the car, which made Yuigahama smile cheerfully. Even though my mom dislike dogs, but I was confident she won't dislike me and turn me down easily.

I rolled up my window, and exited the car for a moment as I decided to sit at the passenger's seat along with Yuigahama and her dog to further explain Yukinoshita's situation.

"Good afternoon." My mom greeted Yuigahama as she looked at her on the rear view mirror of the car.

"G-Good afternoon, Hikki-san!" Yuigahama nervously responded her greet. _Wait, Hikki-san?_

"Hikki-san?" My mom furrowed her eyebrow as she muttered, but was quickly interrupted by the loud barking of Yuigahama's enthusiastic dog, Sable.

"Woof, woof!"

"That dog… Hachiman, tell me again how'd you get into that accident on your first day of high school?" My mom asked softly yet there was coldness behind voice. The clenching of her hand on the steering wheel could be heard from back here.

I flinched when she brought up the topic while Yuigahama made a worried look but quickly let out a dry laugh. I scratched my head as I refreshed my mom's memory.

"Well… it's… because I saved a dog…"

"You mean this dog." My mom corrected my sentence, as she was referring to Sable. I flinched.

"Judging from your expression, I am correct, am I?"

I expected no less from my mom, this was another skill of hers; the ability to easily read facial expression like a book.

I was a bit taken aback on how she knew it was this dog or maybe it was just me falling into her scheme of exposing the truth from me yet again, I ignored and continued on.

"Yeah, I guess… and…"

"Ended up in the hospital for a week, and as a result made you into a pathetic miserable loner." My mom quickly interjected me. _Jeez, if you remember then why bother asking!?_

It's because of what happened to me, my mom started to despise dogs.

Her voice grew sharper and colder, then she glared at Sable through the rear view mirror which made Sable whimpering as the dog retreated onto Yuigahama's lap.

 _Hey I know how you feel Sable, she's quite the anomaly… still mom, pathetic miserable loner? That's harsh, even at your own son…_

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry for causing Hikki so much trouble! I'm sorry!" Yuigahama quickly and rapidly bowed her head numerous times behind my mom's front seat. I felt nothing but pity for Yuigahama and her dog; it seemed my mom went overboard.

"Hey come on mom… it's not her fault that I ended up in the hospital." I defended Yuigahama, it's true it wasn't her fault.

"It was ultimately my fault for being so reckless and took action without thinking." I continued defending Yuigahama.

"Hikki…" Yuigahama gazed at me and made a small smile. It seems she realized my intention; I quickly looked away from her while scratching my head out of embarrassment.

Truthfully, it wasn't mine as well. We were both victim of the speeding black limousine that hit me and later found out it was Yukinoshita's. Still, I didn't regret a thing for my action, if it wasn't for the accident; I wouldn't have met such amazing people.

"Fine… I guess I could let her… what is it that you young people say…" my mom started making a thinking posture as she was holding her chin.

Yuigahama let out a sigh of relief as she rubbed her chest with her right hand while I waited for my mom's comical response as she was currently thinking deeply in her thoughts.

 _Really, why is she trying so hard to act so young?_

"Ah! Off the hook…for now." My mom smiled triumphantly, cutely in satisfaction as she figured out another phrase from the teenager's dictionary.

 _Mom, you're pathetic._

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

A few minutes had passed since we picked up Yuigahama and her dog; we're currently on the highway and on route to Yukinoshita's place around the outskirt of Chiba Prefecture. My mom drove silently as she was listening to the radio while made a short glanced at the GPS giving her directions to our destination , Sable was snoring as she took a nap on Yuigahama's lap, while I was busy explaining to Yuigahama about Yukinoshita's situation. Yuigahama puts on a worried expression and nodded the entire time as I explained to her.

It was very obvious that she was worried, just as I finished explaining everything that's necessary for her to hear out; I let out a deep fatigue sigh due to my conditions.

"So that's how it is huh? I can't say I understand Yukinon's situation now but poor Yukinon…" Yuigahama said softly as she casted her eyes down looking like she could break into tears at any moment.

"Yeah. That's how it is." I briefly said.

"I can't believe her parents would do something like that, even to her own daughter." Yuigahama's voice was trembling for a moment.

To be honest, I didn't want Yuigahama to get involved in this, because if we can't solve the issue… she will only realize the cruelty of reality that may change her whole aspect and her persona. Yui Yuigahama wasn't the type of girl who accepts reality or had any belief in it; rather she ran away from it and retreated to her little bright cheerful world called youth. Once she experiences the pain from reality that crushes every youthful dream, it'll change her forever. She won't be Yui Yuigahama anymore but into someone more…like me.

But she's Yukinoshita's friend, she had every right to be here, I just hope it won't hurt her along the way.

"That's why we're going there and try to straight things out." I said to her and she stared at me a bit worried of what I had in mind.

"How exactly Hikki?"

"Convince them I supposed." I answered her, and it looked like that answer satisfied her curiosity but truthfully there's more to it than just simply convincing with mere words if things won't go so well.

If so, I'll have to use the worst possible method. I know I made a vow to both Yukinoshita and Yuigahama that I won't use such method, but at desperate time's calls for desperate measure, if we crossed that bridge.

Suddenly a sneeze was about to let out, and so I covered my mouth as I let out a cough. My nose started running as usual every time after a cough was let out from me.

"Are you okay Hikki!?" Yuigahama was startled by my loud cough that also woke up Sable who was currently whimpering as the dog seemed worried as well.

"Yeah. I'm fine." After I answered her briefly a headache made its way to me, I placed my hand on my temple to further suppress it.

"Are you sure?" Yuigahama noticed and made a concerning look at my direction.

"Maybe you should take a nap for a while…" My mom showed her concern for me as well, as she also noticed my conditions from the reflection of the rear view mirror.

Yuigahama immediately smiled at her and shifted her cheerful smile to me.

"Yeah!" Yuigahama energetically agreed to my mom's suggestion. _Oh well, whatever makes you happy._

"We'll wake you up once we arrived, so don't worry." My mom as always was being thoughtful for her son's sake.

"Fine." I obliged their request and I leaned back against the soft seat. I turned my stare to outside to the scenery.

As I slowly closed my eyes, everything around just went dead silent. It was peaceful, relaxing, the artificial air from the ac cooled me from my headache and the movement of the car also helped stop the mucus in my nostril from running down any further, its movement also acted like a swinging bed for babies that helped them sleep. Once my eyes closed and without any interference of my conditions, I began dozing off and I immediately fell into deep slumber.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Everything was black.

Obviously I was still sleeping, but was this my dream?

As expected, how a loner like me could have such dreams.

How could anyone have dreams?

Probably because they haven't face much of reality just as I have.

Reality, wasn't a lie, it's the truth. A Truth behind a lie I supposed and you know what they say, Truth hurts. More than you could imagined.

That's why most people preferred a lie over a truth.

I experienced it first hand, a lot of times in the past and recently.

Once they do experience reality, once they discovered a world full of lies…

All their bright happy youthful dreams will shatter like glass and,

When they sleep…all they can dream of will be the pitch black darkness of this world.

Maybe that's why I didn't want Yuigahama to get involved, I knew what she'll have to go through once she experience reality.

I didn't want her to become another…Hachiman Hikigaya.

 _Wait.. what's that noise?_

Suddenly, I heard what sounded like water streaming. The sound of the water intensified, it grew louder and louder and I felt like I was sitting, moving forward for some reason, so, I tried opening my eyes.

When I did, or so I thought, it was still dark but at there was a small light like a dot at the end of it.

 _So is this what they called a light at the end of the tunnel? Heh how cliché_

 _Is that supposed to be hope?_

I didn't move but it was getting closer and closer, a robotic voice suddenly spoke out ominous words. It was awfully familiar, I remembered hearing that, somewhere.

As the light was in front of me already, I instinctively closed my eyes again as the light was too bright to look at, then the movement had stopped, a strong breeze made its way piercing through me. I felt like I was somewhere high. I slowly opened my eyes and was surprised of where I was.

 _This is…_

It was the view of Destinyland from the peak of the Spride Mountain ride. There was no doubt I was still dreaming, _but why am I dreaming this?_

The scenery was the same as back then, the same starry night that was illuminated by the lights down below from Destinyland.

The volcano that was illuminated brightly red and puffed out smoke.

The number of hotels that was glowed with the lights of the Christmas tree.

The white wall castle, lit with colors of white and blue.

I started to recall something else happened here; someone was with me at that time. Suddenly the cuff of my coat was squeezed, I turned my head to my right, and it was Yukino Yukinoshita wearing the same outfit with the same smiled that was on the verge of tears illuminated by the visage of lights as back then.

"Hikigaya-kun…" I haven't heard her calling my name with her voice or even seen her for quite a while. It felt nostalgic in a way.

"Help me someday okay?"

 _What did she really mean by that?_

As I thought about it, I never did ask what she meant by that, I did try to but the ride quickly descend and made me forget during that moment. As I tried asking her now in my dreams, I was unable to, it's as if my voice vanished for some reason.

I kept asking myself what she meant by helping her. Did she know what was going to happen? My feelings immediately met with the fear of losing…the fear of losing Yukinoshita?

My thoughts were quickly interrupted by a loud boom; I startled and reflexively turned my gaze away from Yukinoshita and to the source of that boom. My eyes then met with the night sky that was illuminated by the ascending of lights that blooms brightly and widely once it reaches the sky.

It was a firework. By the view of the streets, it seems the scene switched from Destinyland to a familiar balcony in a high apartment. I started recalling this scene, it was the night of White day. I felt something was holding my right palm, as I stared at my right hand, it was held by a hand that was as white as snow, yet it was soft and warm then something was leaning on my right shoulder as well. I know fairly well who it was, as I turned my gaze to her, the turning of my face was stopped by a nostalgic sensation.

It was the kiss from Yukino Yukinoshita onto my cheek. Still, it felt real…

As she removed her lips from my cheek, she stared at me with her beautiful moist blue eyes, her lips smiling sweetly on her beautiful face illuminated by the fireworks from the night sky.

"I love you, Hachiman."

That was the moment where everything changed; I gained something from her three words. It made me feel fulfilled.

I wanted to respond to her words, I wanted to say the words that I was unable to say to her ever since.

"Y-Yukino…" my voice slowly returns, while her expression was frozen.

"…I.." bits by bits, I continued trying to say the words I needed to say to her, swallowing the sob that was slowly trying to break into tears. For some reason I started sweating, I shouldn't feel wet even in my dreams.

Suddenly a voice made its way,

"Sable!" that one word echoed throughout my head, it was Yuigahama's voice.

"Sable!" the voice grew louder and louder, I couldn't even hear my own voice as I tried to respond to Yukinoshita.

"WOOF!"

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Finally, I opened my eyes to see Sable closing in on my face, licking repeatedly, wetly on my entire face.

"What the hell!?" I startled and taken hold of the dog, pulling it away from my face.

"Sorry Hikki! I tried to hold him but he just keeps on losing and started licking you." Yuigahama slightly bowed her head to me as an apology and I stopped her with a hand gesture. I handed her the dog and started wiping the saliva that was sticking on my face with my t-shirt.

 _So it was a dream after all huh…_

"Well at least it woke him up."

I gazed at the owner of the voice, my mom. I realized the car stopped moving as she was staring at me with her arms folded resting on the steering wheel.

"How long was I asleep?" I rubbed the corner of my eyes.

"Well, we arrived here roughly around like ten minutes ago I guess." My mom answered me. _That long?_

"I tried waking you Hikki, but you kept rumbling about something."

"Hachiman, I hope you're not fantasizing about someone."

Her statement quickly reddens my face as I flustered, Yuigahama reacted the same as well for some reason and looked away to the window beside her. _Just why are you flustering about?_

"Wh-What, no!" I stammered out of embarrassment as I was defending myself.

"Look, look Hikki!" As I looked to where Yuigahama wanted me to look which was at the window of her seat, I was quickly stunned by the scenery and the sight of one particular building and its surrounding.

"Is that what I think it is…"

"Yup! We're here! Yukinon's home." Yuigahama excitedly answered me enthusiastically. _It's freaking huge! Haruno really wasn't kidding; she really does live in a mansion!_

Yukinoshita's house or mansion has a design of those from classic European style, colored peach while the roof was top flat white. It was a double story building yet a very, very long and wide building. There were large gardens compromising of variety of flowers, trees surrounding the mansion and a gardener that was currently attending the garden. There's also a huge fountain sprinkle its water upwards, located in the midsection of the area. The whole place was surrounded by tall, shiny yet sharp looking silver colored gates.

We were currently parked outside the gate at the parking area; there were only two cars parked here; my mom's car and a white limousine next to it. Must be the Hayamas' since Yukinoshita's limousine was black as I remembered, so that showed there were no other guests beside the Hayamas' and me along with Yuigahama, which was very convenient. The lesser the people, the lesser the trouble.

As me and Yuigahama was still stunned by the surrounding and environment of Yukinoshita's house, I took a peek glance at my mom and she was just staring at the house expressionless and calm. I was a bit bewildered that she's not as surprised and overreacted as us, there was no reaction coming from her, her expression was slowly seemingly disinterest as she quickly averted her gaze from it.

"You okay mom?" I asked.

"So… your friend, is a Yukinoshita?"

Her response quickly surprised me. _Wait, how did she know this place belongs to Yukinoshita?_ As I thought about it, maybe it was perhaps that the Yukinoshita were that famous I supposed, and so I didn't bother asking and just answered her question.

"Y-Yeah. "

"I see…"

After that, silence filled the gap but after a while of staring at the surrounding, I came back to my senses on what we're supposed to do.

"Come on Yuiga."

"Mm." Yuigahama nodded and opened the door on her side and exited the car.

"Stay here mom, it won't be long." I instructed my mom to stay in the car, since it wasn't her responsible to deal with Yukinoshita but mine and Yuigahama , also because I didn't want her to see what I am and what I was about to spat out in meeting both families, there'll be no formalities or courtesy on what I intended to do.

"Fine." My mom obliged. But I couldn't help that there's something wrong, she looked very displeased about something.

"Ohh! And take care of Sable, thanks." Yuigahama briefly said before walking away from the car, and my mom slowly gazed at Sable on the backseat of the car as the dog was currently sitting while wagging its tail and tongue.

My mom didn't make any respond but just pulled out her phone and started fiddling with it on her seat. _Figures…once a corporate slave always a corporate slave._

As we exited the small minicar that we've been in nearly over an hour, we proceeded in approaching the gate in front of us. There was a security stand there in front of the gate, and as we walked near it, the security guard inside the stand immediately noticed us.

"Hello, may I help you?" the security asked us.

"U-Um yeah, we're here for a friend, Yukino Yukinoshita." I answered him.

"Ah hold on a moment." The security proceeded in pulling out a book and began flipping the pages of it, while waiting, I did nothing but inhaled and exhaled the fresh air like an ac removing any artificial air left swirling in my lungs while Yuigahama folded her hands behind her back and started swinging her foot.

"Sorry, but it seems Yukino Yukinoshita-sama isn't expecting any visitors today." The security guard briefly said while his gazed was still on the book as he continued flipping the pages for his reassuring statement.

Yuigahama quickly stared at me looking a bit worried. _Well this is awkward…_

Suddenly we heard steps, a sound of wooden heels walking towards our direction.

"Ah, they're with me." it was Haruno Yukinoshita answering the security guard on our behalf from the other side of the gate between us in a violet white flower patterned kimono with white wooden sandals.

"Ah my apologies Haruno Yukinoshita-sama."

Haruno shook her head, and the security guard pressed a button that slowly opens the automated gate in front of us. Yuigahama was astounded by it while I was staring at Haruno and she also stared at me with her usual smile.

"Please, you may proceed." The security guard insisted and I nodded at him as me and Yuigahama started walking and approaching Haruno.

As we passed by the gate, the gate once more closed behind us.

"Yahallo Hikigaya-kun, Yahallo Gahama-chan." Haruno greeted us energetically loudly.

"Yahallo Haruno-san! Ah you look beautiful!" Yuigahama replied her greet following by a compliment as well.

I didn't exchange greetings nor have any interest on her attire but only nodded at her and she nodded back at me as well. We then began walking on the high class marble pavement next to the road towards the huge building in the distance.

"It seems things are getting worse huh?" I asked a question directly to Haruno. She stared at me blankly while we continued walking.

"Huh? How could you tell?" Haruno puts up a smile as she asked me.

"Well, your timing couldn't be more perfect back there when you helped us through the gate, it can't be a coincidence, which means you were outside the whole time when you saw us arrive, even though your thick armor was instructed to show an undying courtesy to the guests, it's a bit rude to just left the meeting between your family and the guests to head outside, it's so unlike you unless it was for a good reason or you just can't stand the sight of your sister being pushed and ordered around like a doll, therefore the reason why you're outside is as I explained." I let out a deep breath as I finished.

Haruno placed her hand over her lips and lets out a small laugh while still walking.

"That's quite the analysis, still… welcome back." Haruno briefly respond me as she smiled at my direction.

"Huh? What do you mean? I just got here…" I scratched my head and averted my gaze away from her.

"You know Hikki, I always thought you're smart, but sometimes your way of smart is just plain creepy." Yuigahama made a disgusted look at me, and Haruno instantly burst into laughter.

"Shut up…"

"Well that's true Gahama-chan, but that's what makes Hikigaya fun after all." Haruno winked her eyes at me, and I flustered, slowly averted from her once more.

"Well I guess…" Yuigahama hesitated at first but accepted Haruno's comment of me.

"Anyway, I hope you guys didn't get lost while you were on your way here." Haruno said as she was invisibly worried yet her smile masks her worried expression.

"How should I know, I was asleep." I stated, and Yuigahama let out a dry laugh.

"Well the GPS on the car did give us misdirection earlier but Hikki's mom knows her way through so yeah, it's thanks to her." As Yuigahama explained, Haruno's frozen expression was replaced by a look of surprised.

"Your mom Hikigaya?"

"Yeah."

"Ohh I guess I should've meet her and greet her just then. Such a waste…" Haruno briefly said and immediately pouted with her gazed focusing on the pavement of the ground we were walking on.

"Huh? why should you?" I asked a bit irritated. _You trying to make fun of me in front my mom eh? Not happening!_

"Why shouldn't I?" Haruno giggled before continuing on.

"Your mom's quite famous you know." Haruno gazed at me and chuckled.

"I find that hard to believe." I said as I averted my eyes away from her.

"I really look up to her you know, she's more or less my role model."

I was a bit bewildered by what Haruno stated. However, now that I think about it, Haruno and mom was more or less kind of similar in a way I supposed… _except my mom is a complete Son-con._

As we approach the fountain, Yuigahama enthusiastically ran towards it and began swiveling around the fountain.

"Careful now or you'll fall in." I sarcastically warned her. Yuigahama turned indignant and responded me by sticking her tongue out at my direction. _Real mature…_

"He's right Gahama-chan." Haruno wagged her index fingers to Yuigahama like a mother forbidding her child from doing such things.

"Eh!? You're on his side now?" Yuigahama looked disbelief.

"Try looking this way Gahama, Hikigaya cares about your safety." Haruno made a teasing smile as she walked ahead of us.

Me and Yuigahama exchanged glances by reflex, both of us immediately flustered and quickly averted our gaze away from each other.

"Enough blushing you two, and come on in." Haruno reached onto the very looking expensive silver doorknob as she opened the well waxed tall wooden door in front of us.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Me and Yuigahama obediently entered the house through the tall wooden front door then Haruno closed it behind us, and as expected, the house was as high standard just as its surrounding outside. The ceiling was quite high from the ground as it consist a number of chandeliers hanging above, while the floor was comprised of expensive branded marble that echoed our steps throughout the hallway.

Yuigahama was going 'uwaaaah' repeatedly as she turned her head around at numerous direction, while I only acted like I wasn't interested but truthfully I was quite amazed and stunned by the designs and the scale of the house.

"Welcome back Yukinoshita-sama, I see you brought guests." One of the servants greeted Haruno and she simply nodded.

The servant turned his gaze to me and Yuigahama as he stared at us with a furrowed eyebrow from top to bottom inspecting our attire perhaps. Me and Yuigahama wore casual clothes, nothing fancy, we didn't expect there'll be a dressing code for this meeting… well Haruno didn't inform me anything about what to wear through her text message last night.

"Your mother is waiting for your return Yukinoshita-sama."

"This way you guys." Haruno started walking ahead, we followed behind her. Based on how big this place, there's a slight chance we could get lost if we're distracted and not too careful but luckily that's what Haruno was there for as she led us to where the two families were. We continued walking the hallway in silence, but every step we made echoed the hallway.

"So uh… Hayama and your family right?" I asked Haruno.

"Yup. But my dad's not here though, he usually attends some meeting every Sunday at the city. My mom always informs dad what happened during our meeting with the Hayamas'."

 _Well, that's one less Yukinoshita to worry about I supposed._

As we were walking in silence again, murmurings could be heard coming from the room ahead of us on the left side of the hallway. I assumed that's where they're having their meeting. Some of the voices sounded deep in tone, very mature, and there's also a familiar voice made its way to my ear.

"Wait here for a moment." Haruno instructed us to wait as she walked into the room.

"Ah Haruno, where did you go? The guests were worried." There's no doubt about it that voice belongs to her mother. I remembered her voice like it was yesterday during when me and Yuigahama were shopping for Yukinoshita's present and we bumped into Haruno and Hayama, and later Yukinoshita's mother also the night after our event at the community center as we walked Yukinoshita back home.

"Sorry, I just went outside for some air and had to fetch something." Haruno obediently answered her mother. _I guess that's our que to enter._

I looked at Yuigahama and nodded at her, Yuigahama puts up a passionate expression and nodded in return. We took a step forward and walked into the room. The room looked big but still it's a living room I supposed since it had all the necessary furniture and necessities for a living room. In the room on the left sofa across the table, were two unfamiliar adults but their faces resemble to that of Hayama's so I assumed they were Hayama's mother and father, while on the right sitting alone on the sofa was Yukinoshita's mother and between them was Yukinoshita and Hayama sitting on the same sofa diagonally between the two parents. Haruno was standing next to us as I observe the room and the people in it.

Me and Yuigahama lightly bowed our heads as courtesy for the sudden intrusion.

"Visitors? How unexpected." Yukinoshita's mother looked surprised as she placed her hand on her cheek but quickly puts up a gentle smile.

The Hayamas' didn't react at all and just stared at me and Yuigahama like we didn't belong here, well obviously. While Yukinoshita looked very surprised as her eyes widened and her jaw slightly dropped but quickly bit her lips as she casted her eyes down. I took a glanced at her appearance, she was wearing a blue flower patterned kimono much like her sister and her mother but different color and design. As I further inspect her appearance with my eyes, I was slightly surprised because her right hand was wrapped with bandages. The same hand that she slapped me with, but it wasn't really that hard to the point that it won't even cause a minor injury. I looked over to the person sitting next to her, Hayato Hayama who was wearing a business looking suit. It seems the injury on his face caused by me healed already but there's still some slight faint bruise. On the table between them was a thick sheet of documented paper, there were no writings on it, which means they haven't engage their two children for an arranged marriage. I was relieved that I made it just in time.

"Yuigahama-san…Hikigaya-kun." Yukinoshita mumble as her eyes were filled with shock.

Yukinoshita's mother shifted her hand from her cheek, placed it to her chin and calmly asked.

"Your friends Haruno?"

 _Wait what? She didn't remember us at all? Well me, I could understand but Yuigahama?_

"Actually they're Yukino-chan's friend." As Haruno answered her mother, Yukinoshita's mother focused her gaze at Yukinoshita with a calm gentle smile.

Her not remembering both me and especially Yuigahama clearly only proves that to her we were simply ants not worth remembering or acknowledging its existence. I slightly gritted my teeth secretly.

"Yukino?"

Even though she was calling her gently, but I sensed there were force and compulsion behind it.

"I didn't expect their visit." Yukinoshita briefly respond her mother. Of course Yukinoshita never expected any of us to have the guts to just barge in like this.

"It's rude to just intrude unexpectedly, kids." The man in a business suit made a brief statement as he was Hayama's father.

Yuigahama slightly flinched as she casted her gaze down to the floor.

"Now, now, where are our manners. Please have a seat; it's the least since they went this far out of the city." The woman in the kimono next to Hayama's father who I assumed that's his mother showed her courtesy to us _kids._

And so we bowed our head once more as an apology before taking our seat on the sofa at the front opposite of Yukinoshita and Hayama diagonally between the two parents. I took my seat first on the sofa then both Haruno and Yuigahama took theirs next to my left and right squeezing me in between. _Too close…_

Without any further ado, the two parents continued their adultery discussion and didn't even bother asking us any specific question such as our names or our business here; it seems they were not a least bit interested in me and Yuigahama.

"I wonder what they're talking about." Yuigahama mumbled and tilted her head.

"Obviously the terms of those two marriage of course." I answered softly in a low tone.

"Terms?"

 _Really Yuigahama? You don't know?_

"Terms, as in agreement, conditions and requirement." I muttered to her annoyingly.

"Eh, I know what term is. What I wanted to know why would there be conditions for their marriage. I mean couldn't they just sign and move on?" Yuigahama indignantly exclaimed softly to my ear.

"Well, it is mainly business after all. I mean there are only two daughters in the Yukinoshita after all, and a woman isn't fit to be a representative of Chiba diet prefecture, plus Hayato is an only son and his father works for my father so there's a connection, so it would be fitting if those two get married and Hayato will inherit our father's position one day when my father retire."

Haruno finished explaining the details softly to Yuigahama as her smile was still intact but there was no warmth behind it, and her eyes were filled with anger..

"A marriage only for business huh? That's wrong…" Yuigahama muttered to herself.

It was true, a marriage without any emotions or feelings involved but mainly for both their parent's benefit… _is wrong, it's just wrong to have their child's future being fixed to the way their parents wants it to be._

I know it's the parent's duty to know what's best for their children and council them if they ever took a misstep but arranging their future and make a decision in their choices? That's no parenting, that's full control.

"Yukinon…" Yuigahama mumbled sadly as she stared at Yukinoshita with both her eyes casted down while listening to the discussion between the two parents.

"Anytime now Hikigaya." Haruno mumbled while her gaze was directed to both Yukinoshita and Hayama.

I focused both my eyes and ears at the two parents and silently listened to their discussion.

"So I supposed we come in with the terms now?" Hayama's father said, I didn't know what he was talking about though.

"Yes, I believe so. Then without any further ado…" Yukinoshita's mother shifted her gaze from the Hayamas' to both Hayama and Yukinoshita. _I don't like where this is going…_

Hayama glanced at his parents and his father lightly nodded at him with a serious yet calming expression. Hayama returned a nod to him as well; he stood up and immediately took the documented papers from the table in front of him and wrote something. I could only assume it's his signature of approval for their agreement in their marriage. _Damn Hayama…_

I lightly gritted my teeth and clenched my fist tightly.

Once Hayama was done signing, he passed the documents to Yukinoshita. She look hesitated at first but took the document from his hand. Hayama handed her the pen as well and she looked like she was going to sign the paper but she paused for a moment.

"Anytime now Hikigaya…" Haruno repeated her words earlier. I felt nothing but nerve wrecking; I made a gulp and cleared my throat of my nervousness.

Yukinoshita's hand was frozen at that position for a while now.

"Yukino." Yukinoshita's mother stared at Yukinoshita and nodded at her.

Yukinoshita's hand was slightly trembling, and she lightly bit her lips. Clearly Yukinoshita didn't want any of this; it was her mother that wanted this not her. As she stopped her hand from trembling, she continued on forwarding the pen to the document, but before she gets a chance to write anything I stood up…

"No! I'm afraid I can't allow you to do that." My voice echoed the room. All stares were quickly focused at my direction, expression filled with surprised and shocked while Yukinoshita's mother remained her composure but the gentle smile that was on her lips moments ago, disappeared.

"Excuse me?" Hayama's father glared at me.

Yukinoshita slowly puts the pen down and the documented papers next to her.

I let out a deep sigh and repeated out my words loudly.

"I said, I can't allow her to do that."

"Hikki…"

"Oh… are you even in any position to make any demands to my daughter?" Yukinoshita's mother asked softly as she returned smiling.

"No, but she does." I pointed my finger towards Yukinoshita.

"She never wanted any of this." I vigorously said with my word directed to both parents.

"I find that hard to believe. She was the one who agreed to this, she said it herself." Hayama's father responded to my statement. I flinched as I heard that, and quickly glared at Yukinoshita's mother. _She forced her that much?_

"Tell me young man, who are you? What's your business here?" It seems Hayama's father finally started to take interest in me and so I answered his question.

"I'm…"

"He's Yukino-chan's boyfriend of course." Haruno interjected and answered nonchalantly.

"What, the…" I was completely choked by Haruno's statement. I quickly glared at her but she responds me with a smile that says it's no big deal.

Both the Hayama's parents and Yukinoshita looked surprisingly shocked by Haruno's statement. Hayama made a wryly smile, while Yukinoshita's mother closed her eyes and placed her hand on her chin as if she's thinking about something.

Haruno giggled and whispered to me from her seat.

"You're welcome Hikigaya." Haruno winked at me. _So that's how you wanted to play huh? Fine._

I made a smirk and lifted my head up and gazed at everyone in front of me.

"Yes, it's as she said. I'm her boyfriend." I proclaimed loudly to them.

"Oh my…" Hayama's mother placed her hand on her mouth as she was shocked as well by hearing this sudden news.

It wasn't entirely true though, it was just a sudden scheme made by Haruno to try to further convince them that Yukinoshita never had any intention to agree with all of this since Yukinoshita didn't look like she was ready to defy her own mother, and her mother never planned on letting her lose, so the best course would be to convince the Hayamas'.

"What is this boy blabbering about Hayato?" Hayama's father asked his son.

"No, he isn't. Nothing he said is true." Hayama answered his father, acted like he doesn't know anything but he's supposed to. _What the hell? Take a hint idiot!_

Haruno was surprised by Hayama's response as her eyes widened focusing directly at Hayama.

"But I do know fairly well that Yukino agreed to this proposal. She agreed it with me." Hayama slowly grabbed Yukinoshita's hand next to him, holding it. Yukinoshita showed no resistance towards his doing. _What're you doing Hayama!_

"Tch." Haruno gritted her teeth. _This is unexpected._

It seems Hayama was not on our side _, but why… could it be that… damn him.._

Silence filled the room for a moment, my hands were trembling, and I didn't know what to do next. Convincing the Hayamas' was already out of the question since Hayama unexpectedly wasn't on our side to defy Yukinoshita's mother's wishes or his parents. What now?

"Hikki loves Yukinon." Yuigahama softly mumbled yet it was audible to everyone.

"And Yukinon loves Hikki. It's real, I know for a fact Yukinon loves Hikki and she didn't have any intention to agree to this." Yuigahama clenched her hands tightly on her shorts, she was slightly trembling yet her voice was passionate.

"Yuiga…" I was left speechless by her unexpected words. It's unlike her to say something like this, especially when it's not for herself.

"Oh…Hiki, as in Hikigaya? Hachiman Hikigaya?" Yukinoshita's mother asked, as her question was clearly directly for me.

"Y-Yes." I briefly answered her by reflex. _But where did she know my name?_

Yukinoshita's mother casted her eyes down with a calm expression as she began rubbing her chin.

"If I'm not mistaken, you were the one who caused Hayato-kun's injury, correct?"

I flinched immediately, Yuigahama and Haruno reacted the same as well.

"YOU!?"

Hayama's father suddenly burst out loudly as he slammed his hand on the table in front of him which startled all of us except Yukinoshita's mother who remains calmed and composed.

"Calm down dear; let's take a deep breath…"

"YOU DID THIS!?"

Hayama's mother every attempt to calm his husband failed as he continued to let lose his anger onto me. To be honest, I was surprised as well, I didn't expect Yukinoshita's mother to pull this card out because I didn't expect her to acknowledge my existence enough to even know my name.

 _Heh, she did her homework. As much as I'm flattered that my existence is being acknowledged by someone of her class, being known now is a bad thing in this situation now that I'm exposed…_

I did nothing nor respond but smirked at myself while still standing. What she said was the truth, it was too late to lie myself out of here. Yukinoshita's mother cleared her throat as she was about to say something.

"So I guess it's safe to assume that you're one of my daughter's stalkers just like the rest?" _Wait what…_

"You're just the same, you desired my daughter so bad that you punched the man that she agreed to be wed with. Do you desire my daughter that much? How filthy."

 _Now that's a dirty move to pull…_ It's true I punched Hayama but the reason was not what she said. She spilled the truth but then she twisted it, turning it into a lie, Hayama's father's anger with his unclear head would be the likely advantage point for Yukinoshita's mother to take, filling both the Hayama's head with false information of me. It's really unbelievable someone of her appearance with that gentle smile to be so deceitful. I guess to them, appearance were very convincing. Just how gullible were they?

I tried to defend myself, as I refused to give in to her false assumption of me,

"No, it's not-"

"No? then what's the reason you punch Hayato-kun?"

Yukinoshita's mother's question caused me a loss at words as it echoed throughout my head. I was being irrational that time, I let my feelings and my emotions overwhelmed my mind. If I answered her that I was jealous, then she would still assume I'm a stalker but if I answered I was angry by what Hayama said, then she would ask Hayama and he would answer my first choice of answer in my mind. I was unable to answer as any answer I would speak out to Yukinoshita's mother would only favor her false assumption of me. With that, I remained silent.

I'm _cornered. Damn..._

"No Hikki is not like that, he-"

"Of course, naturally you would defend him. He's your friend after all, but you really didn't have to lie about what you said about my daughter."

Just as Yuigahama attempted to defend me, Yukinoshita's mother interjected her and putting up another lie from another, but she did have a good point though, it's instinct to defend your friend, but even so…

"But I wasn't…" Yuigahama's voice began trembling.

Yuigahama didn't lie, but how could we know Yukinoshita's current feelings towards me, but what I do know was part of what Yuigahama said was true; Yukinoshita didn't want to be in this situation where she was forced to agree on something she have no intention of, even Haruno said it herself. Just by looking at Yukinoshita's reaction the entire time proves it. Yukinoshita's mother was quite the illusive woman.

 _Is her mother that desperate that she had to lie everything just so things could go the way she wants it to be? What a control freak…_

"Quit bullsh-"

"Watch your tone boy!"

 _It seems the old geezer won't be cooling down anytime soon…_

Well I guess this was as to be expected. Convincing the Hayamas' to trust us was practically useless now since I punched their beloved perfectionist son, plus to them we were simply unfamiliar strangers. It's instinct of course to trust someone they're familiar with already, and in this case, Yukinoshita's mother. No matter how much she lie, they will always trust her false information and opinion of me over us.

"Oh, Yukino dear, I thought for sure you picked the right school this time. It seems I can't have you decide everything on your own from now on." Yukinoshita's mother gently spoke to her daughter. Yukinoshita silently bit her lips.

"Mom that's enough…" Haruno's voice was trembling with anger.

"Silence Haruno."

Yukinoshita's mother's voice was soft yet it was just as cold and piercing that it could even pierce through the thickest of armor, it even made Haruno flinched.

"I will have words with you later, Haruno."

Haruno went silent with her face casted down as she gritted her teeth and her clenching hands started trembling along with her whole body was visibly shaken. I gazed at Yuigahama who was next to her behind me; her face was frowning in silence. She didn't have anything to say any further. _This is looking bad._

We were completely at a dead end; we used every possible method we had.

Convincing the Hayamas' was useless now since Hayama himself wasn't on our side unexpectedly.

Making the Hayamas' believed us that Yukinoshita didn't want any of this won't do any good either since they trusted more on Yukinoshita's mother's twisted lie over our honesty.

But…

As they say…

At desperate times call for desperate measure.

It seems I would have to use my worst possible method after all. I clenched my fist as I commenced it. I let out a deep breath,

"Yukinoshita."

As I called her, Yukinoshita reflexively lifted her head and stared at me. It's been a while since I hadn't seen her face. I truly missed it; this might probably be the last time that we will ever see each other. _That's why…_

"I…" my legs began trembling and my forehead began sweating.

 _Then if it is… I should.._

"Yukinoshita… I.." Saliva started forming in my mouth as I swallowed it and continued speaking.

"Hikki…"

No, it's not a mere method. But it was something I truly need to say to her. There was something I've needed to tell her, something I've kept for so long.

Ever since we first met, I thought she was just a fool hardy cold ice queen who thinks highly of herself, and I have no interest with her as I hated how she treated me as some broken tool that needed to be fixed, forced me to change into someone who I wasn't. I thought our relationship wouldn't go further than just mere club members, as we're of different worlds. Later I was disappointed because I thought she's someone different from society, but eventually I found out it was just me having such expectation on her.

I made a promised to someone to help her whenever she's troubled and I did but along the way I started to understand her and unexpectedly a connection was made between us as time passed by, even though we still argue over little petty things; we enjoyed and cherished every argument we had.

It was that same argument that made us understand one another, our dislikes and our likes also our desire for something.

There's also a time where we struggle, hurt each other in the process but we talked it out understanding our pain, suffering and eventually forgiveness and chances. As we understand more and more each other, we grew closer and closer till both our world unnoticeably become one.

I knew what was going to happen if we go further ahead, if we grow closer but I kept averting it because it was all new to me, I was afraid I would lose it all if I took a misstep.

I didn't expect things would turn out this way between us eventually because I thought it was just the god of romantic comedy playing tricks on my head again but

I was wrong as expected…

"I..lo-" I could feel myself about to break down at any moment but I tried my best to maintain my composure as I tried to speak out this feelings into words.

We think, we writhed, we struggle over the course we spent our time together, it wasn't like any relationship that I experienced in my whole life living in this world. It wasn't your everyday superficial relationship that I observe and saw through most of the time. If there's a word that I could summarize our whole experience together our relationship together, then it would be…

Genuine.

"I…"

"I…lo.."

I know it's too late, I know it's disgusting to even say it out loud in front of all these people. It seems childish; it destroys all self-respect and dignity I have left. It's the worst possible method ever,

But even so,

Even so..

 _This is what I truly feel!_

"I… I love you! Yukino!"

I quickly lowered my head, while still clenching my shaken fist.

A slight gasped could be heard coming from Yukinoshita's direction while there were also whispers coming from the people around her.

"Heh." Haruno chuckled.

"Hikki…" By the sound of Yuigahama's voice, she wasn't trembling anymore.

I lifted my head immediately and my eyes met with Yukinoshita. She was frozen speechless, the finely shape glossy lips of hers distorted, her expression on her beautiful face was filled with surprise as her blue gentle eyes widened and tears started forming on the corner of it.

Hayama's father's anger quickly faded and was replaced with a stunned look on his face, unable to react to my sudden loud confession towards Yukinoshita just as everybody did as well. Hayama didn't reacted as well but lightly bit his lips and casted down his gaze.

"Haruno, please escort this filth out of my house." Yukinoshita's mother ordered Haruno with a cold and sharp tone voice exposing her true nature under that facade.

Yukinoshita then blinked and came back to her senses as she quickly stood up, and shouted

"No, wait- "

But I immediately stopped her with just a gesture of my hand, I shook my head and made a small smile at her but we both know that I was forcing myself.

If this discussion keeps up any further, things will only get worse, the people I cared about will only get deeply hurt as I glanced at Yuigahama's direction and I would only make some people's situation even worse than it already was as I glanced over at Haruno's direction.

What I wanted was in front of me, but I didn't want the people around me to get effected along the way because of my selfish desire, and so I took a deep breath,

I lightly bowed my head.

"Sorry for the intrusion and the trouble I've caused, we'll take our leave now." I briefly said to the people in front me as I was announcing my leave.

"Hikki…" Yuigahama looked at me with a concerned look while Haruno remain silent, I couldn't make out what expression she was making as her face was casted down and I was still standing but her hands were still clenched.

There was no use in keeping this going, to their eyes we're just mere children who didn't know their place and just barge in an adult matter. They wouldn't expect us to understand.

If there's one thing I learned, that things don't always go the way that we planned to even if we forced it and we don't always get what we wanted. It's as expected, it's reality after all…

Suddenly, all of us were alerted by a sudden loud whimpering, a whimper of a dog. All of us shifted our attention to the source of that whimper, as I turned around behind me, Sable quickly ran into the room with its cord tied up around its jaw shutting its mouth. The dog quickly jumped to its owner, Yuigahama.

"Sable? Eh?! What happened to your mouth?!" Yuigahama reacted nosily back to her usual boisterous self and startled by her dog's current appearance.

Then another living creature took a step forward as she entered the room in her white polo t-shirt underneath her brown sleeveless sweater along with a knee length gray colored skirt with a pair of black stockings, I was very much surprised seeing her in front of me, in front of everyone, it was none other than my mom as she walked in with a smile on her face.

* * *

 **Next Chapter 7: The gathering continues as the monster of truth meets the monster of lie.**

 **Thank you for reading! do leave a review :D**


	9. The gathering continues

**Here you go, please take your time in reading it and sorry in advance for any error written in the story. Please leave a review btw, thank you!**

* * *

 **Chapter 7: The gathering continues as the monster of truth meets the monster of lie.**

* * *

It was still the following afternoon in the Yukinoshita house or somewhat based on the scale of her home; it's more likely a mansion or manor. Me and Yuigahama went over to Yukinoshita's house as uninvited guests to straight things out of her issue with her family which was her arranged marriage. It seems our presence wasn't very welcoming to both the Hayama and the Yukinshita as expected. Haruno helped us as well, in getting her sister out of her forced situation.

We first tried to attempt to convince the Hayamas' by the used of Haruno's foolish act of me being Yukinoshita's boyfriend so it would further convince them it was all nothing but a plot forced by her mother. It would be very convincing, as we were confident to think their son Hayato Hayama would helped us out on this one to convince his parents on but we were sadly mistaken. Hayama unexpectedly opposed us and agreed with the proposal for his arranged marriage for with Yukinoshita , willingly despite the already realized circumstances. We were all in disbelief as we did not expect Hayama to oppose us even to Haruno, probably the only person close to be called a friend to him.

As Yuigahama tried to further convince them with her nonsensical yet emotional words of me and Yukinoshita to the Hayamas, Yukinoshita's mother unexpectedly caught up on my name. I was surprised, well more than surprised that she was well aware of my existence enough to even know my name, which caused her to spill out the truth of Hayama's injury caused by none other than myself, and the result of the truth made Hayama's father burst out in anger loudly.

Yukinoshita's mother took advantage of this and further made a false assumption of me, accusing me of being Yukinoshita's stalker. She twisted the truth of me punching Hayama to her favor, taking advantage of the Hayama's clouded mind by anger, trust, filling their heads with false accusations of me, and further losing their trust towards me. Yuigahama tried to defend me, but Yukinoshita's mother countered her statement as well which shuddered Yuigahama and made her fall to silence. Haruno attempt to defy her mother but her mother remained dominant and silence Haruno with a voice that felt much cold and much penetrating than Haruno's.

From one failed method to another, we eventually ended up in a dead end. That was when I had to break my vow and reverted myself in resorting to use my worst possible method. The method I used on Sagami during the school cultural festival and ended up being hated by everyone in school. The same method when I made a fake confession to Ebina just to save Tobe from the pain of rejection to maintain their superficial relationship among Hayama's clique but ended up hurting the two people whom I genuinely care for. It was a method that neglected all morality; destroy both my self-worth and dignity. Even though the outcome of this method may lead to me not seeing Yukinoshita anymore, but,

Even so…despite the risks, despite the outcome … it's something I truly feel deep within me. I had to let it out, I had to let her know my true feelings towards Yukinoshita and so I burst out loudly those feelings in words to Yukinoshita which startled her and everyone in surprised.

I was well aware if this discussion keeps going any further, if I keep fighting for my selfish desire, the people involve around me will only get hurt, and I would only make their situation worse than it already was, but at least I was satisfied because I told the person whom I genuinely love how I truly feel, and that was enough, yet it wasn't but still it was satisfaction, then I thought to myself that maybe this was what Miura felt, what she meant by letting it out.

After I announced them of my leave and just when I was about to turn around to leave the room, there was a suddenly whimpering of a dog originate from Yuigahama's dog Sable who made a surprised entrance to the room and jumped on Yuigahama with its cord wrapped around its mouth which startled the ownere of the dog.

I was confused for a moment but then another person walked into the room after, as she made her presence known to everyone in the room. That person was surprisingly, my mom. The moment she made her appearance, I knew… this wasn't over, it's just the beginning as the gathering in the Yukinoshita continues…

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

As my mom stood there in front of me smiling and examining the living room and everyone in it with her eyes swimming around in every direction, while all the stares from the people in the room was focusing at her. I was still in daze by her sudden appearance. As I came back to my senses, I focused at her and interrupt her middle exploitation.

"Mom?" I asked still bewildered by her presence.

"Ah Hello, Hachiman. Are you done here?"

"I thought I told you to stay put in the car." I reminded my mom of my given instruction to her.

"So commanding…" She muttered.

My mom let out a sigh and adjusted her glasses with the tip of her finger while Yuigahama began untying the cord around Sable's jaw.

"Well I would've, if it wasn't for that dog…letting out… a bomb…in the car." My mom looked away in embarrassment from me while I reacted to her statement by putting up a disgusted look.

 _Now that's gross…_

"It wasn't my car to begin with. It's a business car for god sake. You I'll be in so much trouble if my superior finds out about this…" My mom was visibly pouting in my direction as she continued grumbling her complaints to me as if I was responsible for this.

 _But still that doesn't give you an excuse to tie up the poor thing's mouth. That's practically animal abuse, mom._

"Bad Sable, bad!" Yuigahama mumbled angrily to her dog as Sable continued its whimpering.

"But the security guard was kind enough to let me in while he called some servants to clean up the mess in the car." My mom's pout quickly turned into a smile to my direction.

"It should be finished by now…" My mom muttered softly as her words were only audible to my ear alone.

 _Finished by now? Wait, how long exactly has she been inside?_

"But it seems we won't be going anywhere soon…" my mom muttered while her gazed was not focusing at me but at someone else in the room.

"Oh that's unfortunate…" Yukinoshita's mother spoke up as she overheard my conversation with mom.

"Then please, allow me. I'll ask my driver to send you back." Yukinoshita's mother put up her false gentle cold smile at my mom while showing off her so called generosity.

"Ah, I appreciate your kind generous offer but like I said…" there was a bit of sarcasm behind my mom's tone.

"We won't be going anywhere…" my mom's smile soon faded as it turned into a cold glare along with her voice grew sharper and colder as she said that.

Yukinoshita's mother cleared her throat and placed her hand on her chin.

"I see, but please… no animals in the house." Said Yukinoshita's mother as she was referring to Sable but I knew she wasn't…

"It's funny how you say animal in plural form when there's only one in the room." My mom saw through her line and smiled yet there's no warmth behind her lips. When Yukinoshita's mother said animals, she didn't really mean Sable, she meant us… the uninvited guests that suddenly barged in on her doorstep.

"Ah, I apologize for my miswording." Yukinoshita's mother let out a short gentle laugh after.

"Still, no dog-"

"Oh I didn't mean the dog…"

Yukinoshita's mother's words were quickly interrupted by my mom. She instinctively paused as she waited for my mom to finish her sentence.

"I meant you…"

Yukinoshita's mother and both the Hayamas' quickly flinched with a brief shocking expression. My mom let out a sigh after and closed her eyes as she took off her glasses from her face along with a small piece of clothing from her pocket sweater and began wiping her glasses.

Haruno briefly whistled in amusement.

Yukinoshita's mother let out a small cough and immediately stared in Haruno's direction.

"Come on mom… this is fun you know, besides…"

"…This discussion has been nothing but boring." This time Haruno showed a bit of defiance towards her mother.

Yukinoshita's mother narrowed her eyes to Haruno, glaring at her with just her eyes but Haruno didn't react or fazed at all. She simply smiled only. It's as if she regained her confidence back after being spooked and shaken by her mother earlier.

 _Was it because of the fact that her so called role model is here shielding her from her mother?_

Knowing Haruno, every time when she refers to something as 'fun', it means something's about to go down.

Yukinoshita's mother then returned her gaze to my mom.

"By any chance, are you this girl's mother?" Yukinoshita's mother asked directly to my mom as she was referring to Yuigahama instead of me causing myself to pity on my existence.

My mom returned wearing her specs and gazed at Yukinoshita's mother to answer her question.

"Actually, I'm his…" My mom pointed her fingers towards me. Yukinoshita's mother then made alternating dubious looks between me and my mom as she narrowed her eyes, looked like she was examining us.

"Is that so? Odd…I don't see the resemblance, Hikigaya-san."

Yuigahama let out a short dry laugh, while Haruno covered her mouth suppressing herself from bursting into laughter.

 _Tch. Figures…_

My mom chuckled and respond to Yukinoshita's mother.

"Oh now, there's no need for formalities. You did call my beloved son a filth after all…"

 _Wait she heard that? I wonder what else she heard, did she listened to the whole conversation?_

"…Besides, to be treated with such courtesy from one such as yourself makes my skin crawl." My mom continued her offence on Yukinoshita's mother.

Even with that kind of words exchanged from my mom, Yukinoshita's mother however, was still maintaining her composure. I wondered how long can she keep up with that façade of her; everything has a limit, including her patience.

"So please, just call me Hebiko." My mom proclaimed her name to Yukinoshita's mother.

Something tells me this was going to be a long conversation, so I slowly went back to my seat on the luxury sofa between Haruno and Yuigahama.

However, this wasn't a conversation between kids and adults anymore. It's now an even game, an adult with an adult. A mother with mother.

Yukinoshita's mother furrowed her eyebrow as if she remembered something then she began rubbing her chin with her fingers while mumbling my mom's name.

"Hebiko…Hikigaya…where have I heard that name before…"

"She's that famous investigative journalist from Chiba media and bulletin bureau, mom." Haruno enthusiastically jog her mother's memory.

"Ah… that journalist."

"It seems I'm well known even among the Yukinoshitas'. I'm flattered." My mom responded to their thoughts of her.

 _So it's true_. Haruno really wasn't kidding about my mother being famous. I just only knew that now that my mother's an investigative journalist. I thought she was just a mere corporate slave sitting in her office and just type some stuffs on a desktop; I was never interested in her occupation because I was never interested in the topic related to 'work'.

"Investigative…Journalist?" Yuigahama mumbled and tilted her head in curiosity while rubbing the head of her dog with her palm, trying to relax it from the trauma earlier.

"It's like a reporter." I answered her curiosity in a whisper.

"Ah…"

But just because I wasn't interested doesn't mean I don't know what it was. The occupation investigative journalist was more or less reporters investigate one single topic of their interest involving crimes, political corruption and even corporate wrongdoing. Truthfully my mother didn't seem the reporter type, but she's more like an interrogator.

A job that overlook past appearances. Under looking corruption and lies for a living. Exposing true nature behind facades. With only one motive, to seek and show the truth to the world with no remorse despite its risks.

A fitting job for one such as my mom… a monster of truth.

"Ummm…" My mom looked at the three of us who were sitting on the sofa with a blank look. _Ohh, does she want to sit?_

Well consider how small the sofa is, I guess only three people could fit in… _but since I'm a guy between two women, oh well…_

As I was going to stand up to let my mom take my seat, Haruno beat me to it as she quickly stood up and gave my mom a hand gesture to take her place.

"P-Please, s-sit." Haruno looked enthusiastic when she stood up but she sounded nervous once she talks to her. It's unlike Haruno to be nervous _. Well when you meet your role model in the flash, I guess one tend to be nervous even for Haruno._

"Ah thank you…umm…"

"It's Haruno Yukinoshita, Hiki- I mean ma'am."

"Ahh…so you're Haruno hmm." Said my mom with a calm expression, but,

"You've grown into a fine young woman." My mom chuckled and took Haruno's seat while Haruno remained standing next to my mom with a puzzled look.

Haruno quickly stared at me seeing if I have any clue but I shrugged my shoulder at her, I was just as confused as she was.

 _Does my mom know Haruno?_

"I guess the young woman over there is your so called friend in a tight spot huh?" My mom asked me softly as she was referring to Yukinoshita who was sitting on sofa with Hayama at the opposite direction of us in the distance of this wide room.

I gazed at the frowned face of Yukinoshita as well, with her left hand still clinging onto Hayama's hand. I instinctively gritted my teeth by the sight of it. My anger was towards Hayama, who put up a calm smile to my reaction.

At the left corner of my eyes, I could see my mom was checking up her phone for a moment, I slowly shifted my gazed to her face from her phone and for some reason; she put up somewhat a smile. I made a gulp once I saw it. It may look like a normal smile to the eye of normal people but to me who knows her for so long, that was somewhat a sinister cold smile with an unknown intention.

"Yukino…"

My mom called out her name. Yukinoshita lifted her head and gazed at my mom with a look of surprised. My mom made a warm concerned, small smile at her for a moment to try to relaxed Yukinoshita, but soon her expression vanished as she immediately switched her gaze back to Yukinoshita's mother.

"Why did you put your daughter in such position?" My mom asked Yukinoshita's mother at the distance as she was sitting on the sofa there with her whole appearance still remained compose and perfect.

Yukinoshita's mother did not answer but she calmly remained silent while sipping her tea like we weren't even there. Well of course I guessed our presence wasn't really that much worthy to her.

"Look you… her daughter agreed to this proposal because she clearly has mutual feelings with my son." The one who answered my mom's question wasn't Yukinoshita's mother but it was Hayama's father as he stood up answering on behalf of Yukinoshita's mother and Yukinoshita.

"Oh did she now? Was that question for you to answer? Clearly I wasn't asking you."

Hayama's father flinched for a moment but continued on with his teeth gritting to each other, it seems he was slightly annoyed with my mom's disrespected tone towards him.

"Even so, you people aren't supposed to be here in the first place. It's not your business to attend."

"True, but it became my business the moment you people ruined my son and his friends."

"Mom…" I muttered as she continued.

"Besides, how could we know the answer to my question? We don't even know what's going on inside that head of hers, which was why I'm asking her and you were interrupting me."

"But still…" Hayama's father tried to respond but was quickly cut short by my mom.

"Clearly you're defending her. But for what? You're defending a person without having any proof or knowledge of her true ulterior motive."

"It's because I trust her."

"Of course you trust her because you're already familiar with her. If I'm not mistaken, you're her husband's legal adviser correct?"

"Y-Yes…but-" Hayama's father stammered as he answered my mom. He's clearly getting nervous; he made a few gulps each time along the way while conversing with my mom.

"I find it hard to believe someone of that position could be so gullible. Just because you work for her husband doesn't mean you know her very well, it means you're simply trusting her blindly" My mom once again interjected Hayama's words from one after another so casually. Hayama's father looked a bit perplexed; it seems he's not sure of himself anymore.

"Like you said, I'm already well familiar with her. Besides, she doesn't look like the type who would force her own- "

"Look like? So you were relying your trust on appearance all along? Remember appearance is the most deceptive method in this world. For a legal adviser, it seems you were fooled so easily by appearances. It's kind of preposterous how you even obtain such position. Well when it comes to people like you with connections, there's always a way, am I right?"

My mom sounded like she was implying something. I knew what my mom was talking about, usually wealthy people has strong connections with people from high places so it's easy for people with such wealth to obtain such occupation easily, jumping through hard work, cheating their way to achieve what they want with special treatment. I guess you could say…

 _Dreams betray many. Hard work betrays none…while wealth cheated all._

Hayama's father froze; he was unable to come up with any response. He was at a loss of words. _He must've understood it my mom's reference… I guess it's something my mom and he knows that we don't._

"It's my job to know these things…So please, refrain yourself from interrupting me any further." My mom's sharped voice along with her glaring snakes eyes caused Hayama's father to wince and slowly went back to his seat in silence. Hayama's mother tapped on his husband's shoulder, trying to relax him.

I always knew my mom could be so dominant, but to this extent? I was quite amaze and admired her dominance over Hayama's father. _I guess that old geezer got what he deserves, heh._

"Hikki, your mom is scary…" Yuigahama whispered to me.

"You just knew that?" I said nonchalantly.

My mom cleared her throat and averted her gaze away from the two Hayamas' as she shifted to Yukinoshita's mother.

"Speaking of appearances…"

"Hmm?" Yukinoshita's mother gazed at my mom with a calm expressionless face.

"People like you always pique my interest. Perfect face, perfect appearance, perfect composure…"

"What are you implying? Are you accusing me of something?" Yukinoshita's mother's hand was twitching so were her eyes, but she looked calm from this distance. _But nonetheless…she fell for it._

"Ohh, I'm not implying anything. You just said it yourself."

Yukinoshita's mother eyes slightly widened in surprised.

"Though, your appearance and exterior is not what I'm interest in. what interest me, about illusory superiority people like you is their interior because underneath that perfect shell…always…lies…a deep…dark…dirty…secret." My mom coldly smiled at Yukinoshita's mother with eyes no traces of remorse.

"What is she talking about Yukinoshita-san?" Hayama's father reluctantly asked Yukinoshita's mother for an explanation to my mom's statement.

Me and Yuigahama remained quiet and just listened to the chatter between adults. I took a glance at Haruno, her expression seemed serious, she wasn't smiling like before or even amused by their conversation.

"You work for the Chiba media and bulletin bureau correct? I'm quite well familiar with your superior."

"Ohh, do you? How well do you know him?" My mom clearly was taunting her.

"Enough to have you removed from the company." Yukinoshita's mother send a sharped piercing voice to my mom, but my mom didn't flinch or react. She was simply grinning. People should be cower to their feet by now but mom, mom didn't. _Nonetheless exposing people for what they are is my mom's specialty after all… especially exposing the truth._

"Oh, is that a threat? Then it only further proves that my statement about you is true."

Yukinoshita's mother flinched. It seems my mom managed to get under her skin.

Although her continuous puzzling words managed to get into my head as I placed my hand on my temple to suppress this headache. It seems my conditions were slowly returning. All this implications, hints, vague and indirect words in this conversation got me overthinking.

I let out a deep breath to clear my head.

"Umm…Hikki?" Yuigahama asked in concern for me.

"I'm fine, just a small headache. Nothing to worry about." I briefly answered her and she nodded only.

My mom overheard this as she proceeded in laying her right hand on top of my head, and began rubbing my hair while her gazed was still stuck on Yukinoshita's mother.

 _You know, that's not going to lessen the pain than it already is mom…_

I gently pushed my mom's hand away from my head, much to my annoyance.

"I'm well aware that you know some people in high places. I may not have strong connections like you but… I know some things…" my mom's smile widens as she continued.

"I've always wondered, why is it that you have a daughter older than my son yet you're much younger than myself…" Now that my mom mentioned it, my first impression of back then when I first saw Yukinoshita's mother was that she looked way younger than my parents, she looked as young as Haruno.

"Both you and your husband are of the same age as well, am I correct?" My mom continued.

Yukinoshita's mother glared at my mom while my mom remained composed and smiled at her. I guess now it's not just her appearance that looked young but also her age. _Where's my mom going with this?_

"What of it?" Yukinoshita's mother asked slightly gritting her teeth.

"Well you see, back then a colleague of mine was interested in the Yukinoshita, so he did a little digging on both Yukinoshita. He found out that you… never finished high school."

Yukinoshita's mother's body began fidgeting, while the Hayamas looked just as surprised as me and Yuigahama. Well if words gets out that Yukinoshita' mother never finished high school, who knows what that'll do to the Yukinoshita image.

"It was very odd, so he further digs in to as why you never did then, he came across something. It's about your first daughter, Haruno." As my mom mentioned Haruno, me and Yuigahama took a brief glance at Haruno. She remained composed and with a calm expression yet focused while staring at her mother and continued listening.

"He began tracing back the date nine months before you gave birth to Haruno and eventually discovery something shocking… you were pregnant during your second year of high school and dropped out of high school immediately because of that."

The room was filled with gasped of surprise; everyone's expression was filled with shock by the jaw dropping news. I never imagined that Yukinoshita's mother could be that kind of person.

Hayama's father quickly stood up.

"Surely that can't be true. If it was, shouldn't this news be published a long time ago?" Hayama's father made a fidgeting hand gesture, clearly he was panicking while defending Yukinoshita's mother.

My mom chuckled and continued.

"That's the one million dollar question, why wasn't that news published? When my colleague discovers it, he went to his superior to further approve his article to publish it throughout the media. But…"

"He was then discarded from his workplace the day after along with his article and evidence being confiscated."

"Right after he was removed, it was unknown why he was but there's a rumor started going on around of him that most of his article he wrote so far was nothing but a dupe, contained false information, publishing untrue story for the purpose of attraction. The rumor spread pretty quickly throughout numerous media company all over Japan."

"So what does this have to do with me? Why are you telling me all this?"

"Why do you ask when you yourself already know the answer? First, it was the topic about you, Saruyuki Yukinoshita. Second, he went to his superior for an approval of his article. Third, he was removed by his superior immediately the day after. And fourth…" My mom made a cold small laugh before continuing.

I paused myself to think for a moment. Reality's much crueler in business than in society. My mom said her colleague was fired for unknown reason, clearly it had something to do with his attempt to publish Yukinoshita's mother's dirty secret, I mean it can't be a coincidence he was fired right after he discovered the truth about Yukinoshita's mother. Right after he was fired my mom stated a rumor started that he was making hoax story with false information, many assume that was the reason for his removal, resulting in his reputation ruined and other media company probably won't accept him due to the loss of trust towards him.

Clearly he was removed by his superior so obviously the one who started the rumor was his superior also. It felt like his superior was making sure he won't publish a single paper of the Yukinoshita, even if he did, the people won't trust in any story published by him due to that rumor. But why was he fired because of his discovery? It would attract interest and profitable, it would be a benefit to their company, and the only victim will be the Yukinoshita with their image ruined. Unless…

"…You said it yourself; you're well familiar with my superior…"

 _Wait don't tell me Yukinoshita's mother…_

"This concludes that, it was a plot between you and my superior, or in other words, you somehow bribe my superior just to keep your pathetic good name safe."

 _Now it makes sense._ The line between dots was starting to connect. It makes perfect sense now.

"You made my superior started that false rumor about my colleague to insure he wouldn't get accepted to any job at any media company also to make sure none of his story is to be trusted."

The room was soon submerged with murmurings and whisperings, Yukinoshita and Hayama's expression was filled with disbelief.

"Yukinoshita-san!?" Hayama's father was shocked as he gazed at Yukinoshita's mother with disbelief waiting for an answer from her.

"She's lying…where's your proof?" Yukinoshita's mother once again tried to maintain her composure despite her fidgeting and her sweating around her forehead along with her twitching eyes.

Haruno took a step forward, with her mouth slightly distorted and her hands were clenching tightly.

"I knew."

Yukinoshita's mother flinched by Haruno's two words, while my mom glanced at Haruno.

"I've always knew that my birth was a mere accident between you and dad. My birth wasn't born out of love… it was out of lust." Haruno gazed at her mother with eyes strong; looking forward with resolve yet there was sadness behind her voice.

"Haruno…" Yukinoshita's mother's voice was slightly trembling, as she was surprised with her expression filled with disbelief.

"I never brought it up because I never believed in it, I used to be proud with myself being born under you, upholding our prestigious name with pride and honor, but as I slowly know what you really are…what you do… I knew this family was full of nothing but secrets and lies, I just don't care anymore."

"Haruno… I was just trying to protect you." Yukinoshita's mother's voice turned gentle in an attempt to calm her daughter.

It's true, if words does get out that Haruno Yukinoshita was born by accident, their view of Haruno Yukinoshita would be much different than it was now. Society will be cruel to her, there will be no respect towards her, everyone will probably be disgusted with her presence alone, making fun of her, calling her names, maybe that's why her mother kept it from the world…but can we trust her mother's words after everything she had done?

I gazed at Haruno as she was trembling with her head casted down to the floor. I couldn't make out what expression she was making, but it's quite unsightly and unlike her.

"Haruno, please…"

"LIAR!" Haruno's sudden outburst startled mostly everyone in the room while my mom remained calm as she watches and listens to the mother and daughter conversation.

Tears started streaming down on Haruno's cheeks. I never thought I would see Haruno cried once more. It's heart wrenching to be honest, to see someone so strong breaks down into tears.

"You never wanted to protect me; all you care about was to protect the name Yukinoshita…because those are the only thing that's dear to you … our image and reputation! But never the people in it!" Haruno's stream of tears continued to flow down her cheeks as she panted after shouting her emotional words to her mother.

Yukinoshita's mother was at loss of words as she froze with her eyes widened. The compose Mrs Yukinoshita had vanished.

"I don't believe that…" My mom softly whispered in a low tone that was only audible to me as Haruno didn't seem to hear her with her state and Yuigahama's attention was only to Haruno.

I took a glance at my mom and she was glancing at me as well as she winked her eye and made a small smile for only a brief moment before quickly returning her gazed to Yukinoshita's mother. _Is she dropping hints again? Is she expecting me to do something?_

Because right now, it's not the best time for me to intrude the conversation between a mother and her daughter. All I could do was staring at Yukinoshita who was in front of me at a distance as her gaze was fixated on Haruno. She's worried about her sister.

I can't imagine how Haruno must be feeling right now. That's what's wrong with most prestigious families; all they're concerned about was their image and reputation but never their family. A child who's born under these circumstances will become nothing but a mere puppet having their choices, way of life and future, give in to their parents ideals, such as Yukinoshita's arranged marriage by her mother, also especially Hayama who does nothing but answering the expectations that was given to him by the people who admire him, who looked up to him just to be a perfect child for his family name. It seems not everyone born under with such wealth can find true happiness, I've always thought people who were loaded could have anything they want in the world, fulfilling their satisfaction in any way they wanted, but in reality, I realized being born under one can be such… a curse.

Haruno began wiping what's left of her tears with her kimono sleeves. Just as she's done, she was still sniffing but her eyes were still red, and there were still some traces of her tears along her cheeks from her eyes.

She slowly switched her gazed from her mother to my mom.

"Honestly, I couldn't care less what you're going to do with this information. All I care about is to remove my sister from such position that my mom forced her to be in. By any means, even if it means shattering the Yukinoshita name…"

"Nee-san…" Yukinoshita was slightly surprised as Haruno showed her concern as an older sister to her sister directly out loud for the first time.

My mom then let out a sigh.

"Very well."

"You wouldn't…" Yukinoshita's mother voice was growling as she glared at my mom.

"I'm considering it." My mom calmly replied her.

"You know what'll happen if you do…"

"That's not going to stop me from publishing it through other media sources aside from the bulletin."

"You'll lose everything."

"The only thing I'll lose are my image and reputation. Unlike you, those two aren't that of a big deal to me, so yeah, I'm willing to risk it all for someone who means everything to me." My mom took a brief glanced at me as she made a warm smile at my direction. _Was she referring to me?_

Yukinoshita's mother quickly stood up and burst out losing all her composure as she started shouting at my mom.

"What gives you the right!? As if you understand the situa-"

"The situation…is… you keep running away from the truth. Hiding from reality behind your lies in your imaginative world."

"Making commands, talking big and forced others to obey you but in the end of the day, you're just a mere housewife."

"Thinking things would go the way you want just by lying and forcing everything."

"It's because of people like you is the reason why the world is so corrupted."

My mom's last few words intensified the atmosphere of the living room causing the room to quickly submerged in silence and her glare, my mom's glaring snake eyes caused everyone to be in a state of paralysis like stone including Yukinoshita's mother who was visibly trembling.

 _No, not like this._ I can't allow my mom to sacrifice and lose everything just for the sake of my desire. I can't live with that, I can't live the guilt of knowing my mom will lose her whole hard work just for me, her reputation and her image will be ruined because of me. I just can't…

"Mom…don't." I pleaded softly to my mom along with my left hand holding onto her right hand to further convince her.

"Of course I won't." My mom instantly answers. _Somehow I feel a bit disappointed._

"I know you won't be happy seeing your beloved mother hurt, right?" My mom made a short giggled and began rubbing my hair.

"Jeez stop it, not in front of everyone." I could feel my face reddened due to embarrassment as I shook off my head away from her hand.

"How could I even possibly publish an article without any raw proof or evidence?"

"Huh? What?" I asked blankly, and then I slowly came back to my senses with what she said, immediately surprised and a bit irritated while my mother let out a small forced laugh.

"My, I never did say I have evidence or proof to begin with. You should try to keep up." My mom pouted then averted her gaze away from me, while I was still enraged making irritated looks at her direction. _This isn't the time to be joking around you old hag!_

"It was never my intention in the first place anyway…" My mom's words were vague as if it's trying to tell something.

"Then why did you blurted out those stuff!?" I asked in panic.

"I was simply taking my sweet time exposing her long enough so he could hear the truth with his own ears…"

 _Wait, he?_

My mom cleared her throat and raises her voice that wasn't directly to anyone in the room.

"I hope you heard all of it…"

Then heavy steps made its presence to all of us as he entered the room, we all turned to the sound of the steps by reflex. A man with full business gray suit along with a brown tie holding a black branded briefcase, his hair was well waxed and combed, his appearance was just as young but his facial feature showed his masculine matureness with a serious expression on his face.

"Mr Yukinoshita." My mom introduced his hidden presence to all of us. The father of both the Yukinoshita daughter, the husband of Saruyuki Yukinoshita and also of course the head of the Yukinoshita.

"Husband?" Yukinoshita's mother's eyes looked like she saw a ghost as she was shocked and her face grew paler for some reason to see her husband in front of her.

"Bribery, Saruyuki? And you forced our daughter? I thought you said she agreed to this willingly…"

 _Wait what!? She lied to him as well!?_

The room was quickly filled with numerous gasped and everyone was completely taken aback with what he said. I was just as surprised too. Even I didn't suspect this; everyone probably didn't suspected this as well. It was horrid news to all of us, that Yukinoshita's mother lied to her own husband. I thought he agreed with her wife as well but it seems he was fooled as well like the rest of us.

Now I get it,

So that was my mom's intention all along, it was all well planned out. Maybe that's why she's been fiddling with her phone from back then in the car and just now before she commenced her plan, it was to contact Yukinoshita's father, also to instruct him to wait outside, hiding his presence so she can exposed enough of Yukinoshita's mother's lies for him to hear the truth with his own ears. What's bugging me though was how my mom did possessed Yukinoshita's father's number? Was she well familiar with her father?

Numbers of questions started piling up inside my head but soon I tried to forget as these small details did not matter because what matters was the current situation in front of me.

Hayama's father stood up still in a state of shock as he switched stares between both the Yukinoshita.

"Wait, you knew about this arranged marriage right? I mean we talked about it during our work and…" Hayama's father was stammering as he was talking with Yukinoshita's father.

"Yes I was well aware of the arrangement, but what I didn't know that my daughter was forced against her own will by my own wife. I was informed that she wanted this, I guess I was mistaken."

"It seems so… It seems I was wrong after all." Hayama's father casted his gazed down with a looked of regret and shame, probably because he never trusted our honesty rather he trusted the lies coming from the mouth of that certain woman and just simply trusted her blindly as my mom said.

Now I get it… Her mother acted as nothing but an envoy to her husband between their two daughters, but it seems his wife was giving him nothing but false information about his daughter. I mean, Yukinoshita's father was currently a diet member representing Chiba, so I could understand why he trusted his daughters to his wife but as a father you should try see your daughters once in a while with your own eyes and converse with them as well, not relying too much on your wife information. But why… why didn't their father noticed this sooner? Maybe I guessed there is such a person with a positive mind, too positive that they overlooked the rotten negative side of a person and just trusted them blindly. _I guess that's the kind of man he is I supposed._

"Dad?"

"Hello Haruno."

The way they both looked at each other seemed like they hadn't seen each other for quite a while.

After Yukinoshita's father greeted Haruno, he proceeded walking towards to his other daughter. Yukinoshita was still surprised with her mouth slightly opened and her eyes were seemingly worried by her father's sudden appearance.

"Wow, that's Yukinon's dad? His tall and kind of good looking…" Yuigahama whispered to me while rubbing the head of her sleeping dog.

"Ohh you're into older man now?" I teased with a bit of sarcasm.

"Ehh, no way. But still of course I have to be into someone older than my age, isn't that normal?" Yuigahama ranted quietly to me.

Well, Yukinoshita's father do looked a bit tall, probably three inches taller than me I supposed, his jaw and cheekbone were visible, kind of looked like those of a male model. _But seriously, why this family looked so young and so perfect!? Must be their genes, yeah I guess they are blessed with it…_

Hayama's father took a step back so Yukinsohita's father could approach his daughter. He continued walking and put his briefcase on top of the table between them.

"Father…" Yukinoshita looked up to his father with a concerning looked. I couldn't see what facial expression her father was making right now, since his back was facing our direction.

He took a brief look at his daughter before switching his gazed to his wife.

"Saruyuki…" His deep yet soft voice startled his wife.

"Husband, it's not what you think." Yukinoshita's mother was in a state of panic.

"If it wasn't for Hebiko-san, informing what was going on… I wouldn't have heard the truth sooner, but I heard it clearly with my own ears."

"Husband, please let me-"

"Silence! Enough with your lies."

His sudden yell to his wife silenced the room. His voice completely changed the atmosphere of the room. The Hayamas did nothing but casted their gazed down as they listened to their superior scolding his wife.

"I'm very disappointed with you." Yukinoshita's father said directly to his wife which left her speechless along with her face casted down to the floor.

"Oh please…" My mom suddenly raises her voice towards Yukinoshita's father. All stare and attention returned back to my mom once more.

"Don't act like this is all her fault, you're just as wrong as she is."

"Excuse me?" Yukinoshita's father bewildered as he gazed at my mom with a puzzled look.

"If it wasn't for you being so positively minded, relying too much of your trust on your wife, and if you'd only visited your daughter from time to time, none of your daughters would be in this mess in the first place."

My mom's words caused Yukinoshita's father mouth to be slightly opened.

"But there's more to it than that, is there? I mean you could visit your daughter anytime you wanted, your office hours aren't that different than my own, but you chose to work overtime for some reason…"

Yukinoshita's father light bit his lips and looked away from her.

"Tell me…" My mom continued her interrogation her Yukinoshita's father.

"Work? But obviously we wanted to know the reason why you work overtime…"

"Cheating?"

"No, that's not-"

"Then what is it? Tell me." My mom continued pressuring Yukinoshita's father for the truth.

"Or maybe, you're avoiding your family…"

"Are you implying that I don't love them?" Yukinshita's father began protesting that statement.

"Who knows, I don't know…" My mom rolled her eyes sideways.

"I do…" Haruno spoke up.

"Even I have my own eyes and ears in this house. You see us nothing as disappointments. I was an accident while Yukino…Yukino…" Haruno hesitated as she struggle herself to continue on, she began trembling and heavily bit her lips.

"Nee-san, what is it?" Yukinoshita asked her sister with a concerning look.

"You weren't as expected…" Haruno quickly placed her hand on her mouth to suppress herself from breaking into sob, as tears started forming on the corner of her eyes once more.

Haruno's vague answer caused Yukinoshita to make a puzzled look. It's true; this family was full of lies and secrecy. _Just what kind of family is this?_

"I… don't… I don't understand." Yukinoshita mumbled softly.

"Now that makes things more clear… you didn't expected a daughter to be born did you? You expected a son." My mom cleared up the confusion in Yukinoshita's mind which caused Yukinoshita's father to flinch and averted his gazed away from my mom. It seems my mom caught him.

Yukinoshita's eyes widened in surprised with her mouth slightly distorted almost looked like she was about to break into tears. I guessed one could say, in other words, she wasn't welcome by her parents, she came to this world uninvited and unexpected, but still how could one fixed something to the way they wanted? We're not gods. Can't they just be grateful with what they have? I was feeling slightly angry and frustration towards their father.

"To inherit your position one day when you retire, but you were disappointed. I guess that's why you avoided them as much as possible because you lost interest. Also the reason why your wife forced your daughter to marry the son of the Hayamas, someone whom you're familiar with, who you trusted…, everything just to satisfy your selfish ideals." My mom continued on.

"I never asked her to…" Yukinoshita's father mumbled while casted his gaze down to the floor.

"Then you should've been there in the first place, alongside your family but you neglected them. You left your wife alone, to deal with things that are new to her. Upholding your prestigious names, pressurized by your name, dealing with your social and formal gathering on her own. With the fear of making any mistake from disgracing your precious name. So she compromises everything, and right now… what you're seeing is the result of your action alone." My mom sends a sharped tone voice to Yukinoshita's father.

Somehow I can relate myself with Yukinoshita's mother. Back then when I realized Yuigahama's and Yukinoshita's true feelings towards me, I didn't know what to do and so I remained quiet and avert their feelings, because it was all new to me, and if I make one misstep, I would lose everything. I was blindly making our relationship stagnated, averting from what's genuine.

While Yukinoshita's mother could be said the same as well, she's an ordinary person being married to a prestigious man. Entering a new world so everything was relatively new to her, but because her husband neglected her, she didn't know what to do but to compromise. Forcing herself and her daughters to put up such facades, making them a superficial being of her ideals just so she wouldn't make any missteps to disgrace her husband's good name.

"But I gave them everything. I even let you live on your own, Yukino, just as you wished…" Yukinoshita's father began defending himself. I feel slightly disgusted with her father. That's not love… at all…

"Giving and loving are two different things! Please stop your rambling before you embarrass yourself any further." My mom coldly interrupted him and began yelling at him.

"You hope by giving them gifts would make up all the mistakes you neglected to your daughters, convincing them you love them by giving simple objects. That's nothing but sham. Just look at them, do they seem to be loved? All your parenting so far has done nothing but pressuring them, stressing them, suffering them because of you two. Because of your name, they pushed themselves, sacrificing pieces of who they are just for your god forsaken name and what do you do? You left them to rot by their own mother." There was no warmth at all both voice and eyes of my mom as she continued glaring at Yukinoshita's father.

"I… I didn't know…" Yukinoshita's father slowly lifted his head as he turned his head towards our direction.

He gazed at Haruno with a worried look, but Haruno crossed her arms on her chest, slightly bit her lips and looked away from him.

He switched his gazed to Yukinoshita who was in front of him; Yukinoshita didn't look at him, but only lowered her head with eyes full of sorrow. It's to be expected since she wasn't to be expected at all by both her parents. She must be feeling distraught and devastated.

"Yukinon…" Yuigahama muttered while staring at Yukinoshita with a concerned look mixed with sadness behind her voice.

"There are two members in a parent for a reason. Not just in terms of biology though…" My mom continued her philosophy while,

Yuigahama and I exchanged glances by instinct, as our eyes met by accident; we flustered and quickly averted our gazed from each other.

"So if one made a mistake, the other could correct them and learn something new from each other every day while loving and caring your child along the way… but you contradict it."

"It's not that you didn't know… You just neglected them. Trusting and relying your wife to fix it all alone, but it only made it worse." Said my mom coldly and still glared at Yukinoshita's father.

Yukinoshita's father froze as he was unable say anything. What my mom said was clearly the truth.

"You're right. It's my fault…" Yukinoshita's father frowned as he started kneeling down to Yukinoshita and grabbed hold of her shoulders.

"Yukino…" He took a brief glance at Haruno behind him in a distance across the room. Haruno didn't bother look at him as her eyes were still averted from him.

"Haruno…"

"Forgive me, I am truly sorry…" Yukinoshita's father apologized while his gazed was stuck on the floor where he stood. After he's done, he returned his gaze to Yukinoshita with his hand still holding onto her shoulders.

"I know now your mother forced you to agree to this, but I don't really know what you're thinking… that's why, I'm asking… do you wish to continue this proposal?" His voice was soft yet the question alone echoed the room and reached my ears.

Haruno quickly shifted her attention and gazed back at her sister.

 _This is it… this is the question we've been waiting for. Now for the answer…_

I made a gulp by instinct as my stare was fixated at the father and daughter of the Yukinoshita that was in front of me across the room in the distance, waiting for the answer. Haruno did so as well with a serious and focused expression as her eyebrows closed together along with her arms still crossing tightly. Yuigahama stared while looking a bit concerned and as for my mom, she was busy wiping the lenses of her glasses with a small piece of clothing but she was definitely waiting as well.

Hayama who was next to Yukinoshita, made a somewhat sour expression as most of his facial feature looked like he swallowed something bitter. Yukinoshita's mother didn't lift her head to look as her face remains casted down, while the Hayama parents focused on the father and daughter of the Yukinoshita.

The room submerges in silence, and everything in it froze as we waited for the answer of Yukinoshita so the frozen time could move once again.

Suddenly, there was only the sound of heartbeat that filled the void of this silent room. Perhaps it was mine, the tension was high, I began sweating for some reason. Anxiety filled both my mind and heart. The speed of my heartbeat gradually increases as each second passes as I waited. I feel like I was going to have a breakdown or a heart attack out of anxiety at any moment by just by waiting for that fateful answer. I just realized that I've already made several gulps as my saliva kept forming continuously inside my mouth. My eyes were only focusing on Yukinoshita, my ears were waiting for the answer from her mouth.

Yukinoshita paused for a brief moment but then she pulled her hand away from Hayama's grasp as she lifted her head up and gazed at her father with strength that was lost from her eyes returns as she answered her father.

"…No."

Time moves on again, as her answer alone made all the anxiety in my body escaped through my mouth into a deep breath of relief. Yuigahama who was next to me let out a sigh of relief as she was rubbing her chest to relax herself from the tension of waiting moments ago. I peek a glanced at Haruno and she looked a bit relaxed, although she wasn't smiling but she's much calmer than earlier.

Yukinoshita's father nodded at her daughter's answer and stood up from his kneeling positions, as he gazed at Hayama first then shifted to Hayama's parents.

"I apologize Hayato-kun and Hayama-san… but I'm afraid I have to cancel this arrangement, just as my daughter wished." Yukinoshita's father lightly bowed his head to Hayama's parents.

"Ah, there's no need to trouble yourself, Yukinoshita-san. We didn't know as well, so we apologize." Hayama's father apologized as well on behalf of his family and returned a bow to Yukinoshita's father.

As both the adults finished exchanging bows and apology, Yukinoshita's father turned around and proceeded walking towards the direction of his wife. As he stopped his tracks, standing in front and looked below at his wife, Yukinoshita's mother began fidgeting. She was hesitated and scared as she could not bear to look at her husband, so she her gazed remained casted down along with her head lowered.

"Despite my mistakes to you and our daughters, that doesn't give you an excuse to just lie to me and forced our daughters against their will" His voice was soft yet it was filled with anger and force which caused Yukinoshita's mother's whole body to tremble.

"What you did, can't be overlook so easily." Yukinoshita's father's words caused their mother caused her mouth to distorted and tears started streaming down her face.

I realized this wasn't over. I thought the moment when Yukinoshita said 'No', I thought that was it, but I guessed not, this wasn't a movie or a fairytale book where they live happily ever after and the end then fades to black, this is reality. Once Yukinoshita was done stating her answer to her father, I wondered what will happen to her mother after. As I watched Yukinoshita's father continued scolding his wife softly with mere words, I knew I didn't like where this was going. The ending won't be so happily.

"That's why…I'm considering a di-"

 _No…_

Everything slowed down immediately while time still flows normally in my head as I delve into my thoughts. _"Di-" what? Divorce? No, this isn't how it's supposed to end. I don't want it to end this way. Not like this…_

My purpose of coming here was to straight things out between Yukinoshita and her mother, to convince them to call off the engagement for their arranged marriage. I didn't come here to break the Yukinoshita family apart. I know what she did was absolutely unforgiveable but still… it's still her mother. Suddenly, my mom's words earlier popped up into my head.

 _I don't believe it as well…_

That's why, I stood up quickly despite him not finished what he was about to say… I loudly burst out the only words acceptable to his unfinished sentence.

"NO!"

My sudden burst interrupted Yukinoshita's father from finishing his crucial words, everyone startled and soon all stares were focusing on me. I gazed down, my hands clenching and trembling because what I was about to do maybe, just maybe unforgiveable to their two daughters after everything what their mother did but it's somehow right. I felt this was the right thing to do. I gripped my hands tightly stopping my trembling, and lifted my head up and I gazed strongly to Yukinoshita's father.

"Please… don't." I muttered out those words loudly and both Yukinoshita and his father were surprised by my words.

My mom who was seated puts back her glasses and looked up to me as I was still standing with my gazed focus on Yukinoshita's father.

I know a divorce would be a logical solution to their problem. To stopped it from happening again, to satisfy their daughters and bring peace to their hearts knowing their mother won't be around to caused them trouble anymore but still, I don't believe… I don't believe… that's right. There's no logical needed in this kind of conversation. Only feelings, and what I'm doing felt right to me. Not in general but in terms of family.

"Why?" Yukinoshita's father asked as his gazed was focusing on me as well.

"Because… she loves her daughters. Everything she's done was because she loves them." As I answered, Yukinshita's mother immediately gazed at me with her eyes filled with tears.

"Hikki…"

"Hikigaya…" there was a slight anger in Haruno's voice. I know she doesn't agree with what I was saying but nonetheless…

"What?" Yukinoshita's father was confused; he was at disbelief with my words. I know what Yukinoshita's mother did to them didn't seem like there wasn't any love but I don't believe that.

I quickly gazed at Haruno.

"Haruno, you said you were born by accident that your birth was out of lust but never love, right?" I stammered as I asked Haruno, to which she nodded to me as a yes to my question.

"That's not true… I don't believe that. Your mother…she could abort you…she could throw you away…or even leave you and this family…but instead she chose to stay, to keep you, take care of you with her own hands… doesn't that tell you anything!?" Haruno immediately gasped out of surprised by my statement.

Haruno may think her mother bribed my mom's superior just to protect the Yukinoshita's good image and reputation but I don't believed that, there's more to it, maybe because she didn't want the society to see her daughter as an accident of the Yukinoshita but she wants the people to see how great of a person and daughter Haruno is.

I switched my gaze to Yukinoshita's mother as she looked at me in surprise. _Hey, even I can't believe I'm defending you, after everything you've done to me, heh. I really am complicated._

A smirk formed on my face as I thought to myself.

I couldn't help but think that me and Yukinoshita's mother are quite alike in different way, but we're both loners entered a new world. The moment I joined the service club, there were somethings new to me, there were things I didn't know what to do because it was all relatively new to me that's why I compromised by taking the fall, taking the blame, painted myself in as the bad guy just to give solutions and gain some understanding of the world in return, I didn't mind hurting myself along the way because I thought I was alone but I wasn't. There were people who cared for me all along, who cared for my existence and well-being.

While Yukinoshita's mother, she was left all alone to take care things that was new to her, that's why she also compromised but her method was different than mine. Rather than taking the fall, she took control, ignoring reality and made a world of her own image even if it means lying to just get what she wanted. She didn't have anyone to be there with her, not even her own husband…

"Despite that, that doesn't change anything what she did." said Yukinoshita's father vigorously. Truthfully, yes, but…

I opened my mouth to answer him,

"..…"

I didn't know what to answer him at first; I couldn't find the words to respond to him, that's why… these are the only words I can answer him with. My mom's words to me last night. It was right thing to answer.

"A parent….a parent who doesn't do so much of anything to their child, is a parent who doesn't care nor love their child…" I instinctively slowly gazed my eyes at Yukinoshita who looked at in surprise as well as I continued

"I know it's wrong, maybe…but maybe…she just thinks everything she does…every choice she made…was for what's best for her daughter…but it wasn't…" My voice was slightly disordered as I continued to let out the words bit by bit because if I let it all out at once, I knew it will end with me breaking down into tears.

"…but that doesn't mean she's bad at all, because still, she did it for their daughter's sake…because she cared for them, she loved them just as much…"

I could feel stares from everyone in the room still focusing onto me, slightly surprised by my statement; I immediately heard a slight gasped from Yukinoshita's direction once I stated my response to her father.

"If you could talk things out with each other…maybe you'll understand." I was still stammering, trying so hard to hold myself together from breaking down.

That's right, if you guys could talk things out with one another, maybe you'll eventually understand why they did it, and somehow grow closer genuinely as you understand one another. I learnt that from Yuigahama and Yukinoshita as I made my request back then during the Christmas event with Isshiki.

"So…please…please find it in your heart to forgive her… to give her another chance to right her wrong." I quickly lowered my head in a bow, begging him while contained the feelings that would break me.

Because when it comes to family… everyone deserves a second chance in redemption. I realized that the moment when Yukinoshita forgives her sister Haruno, despite every horrible thing she said and done to her sister, Yukinoshita still finds it in her heart to forgive her.

The room submerged in silence for quite a while after I was done talking. Probably neither of them couldn't believe what I was saying, everything she had done yet I was currently defending her. My gazed was on the floor as I was still lowering my head, I could feel my legs were trembling but I clenched my hands tightly to hold myself to endure any emotional breakdown just like I experienced it for the past few days, my shout towards Komachi, my punched to Hayama's face. This wasn't anger though, it was something else, I tried to keep myself as cool as possible as I waited for a response. After a brief moment of silence a response was made by Yukinoshita's father…

"I'll think about it." I quickly lifted my head up in surprised, as I gazed from the floor to the owner of that voice.

He nodded at me with a calm yet serious face. Even though I wouldn't know what'll happen after, even though the answer he respond me with wasn't a guarantee of anything, even though nothing's confirmed, yet the answer itself was still satisfaction enough to relieve me from the bitter feeling I felt earlier.

Maybe, not everything can be solved by hard cold calculative logic, but sometimes mere words, words poured with strong emotional feelings into it can even break and penetrate the thickest exterior and reached their hearts. As those emotional feelings can connect from one to another. Breaking any boundaries that logic couldn't.

And without realizing, my legs started walking on its own and I found myself out of the room for some unknown reason.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

What felt like a 30 minutes discussion in the living room of the Yukinoshita mansion turns out to be an over an hour discussion as I checked my watch, it was already around five in the afternoon, there wasn't any windows in the hallway so by now the sun should probably be setting and darkness should be taking over the orange skies.

I was currently loitering around the wide spotless and shiny hallway of the mansion with my hands placed in my pockets as the people in the living room was still intact in the room. I didn't hear nor even bother to take peek inside because once I walked out, I won't turn back to look, it wasn't my style but I guessed it's also part of living as you move forward you can't move back, just like how the earth rotates itself forward and never to its opposite direction. I think god or whoever created earth was trying to tell us that everything was about moving forward yet we can never forget the past, as those who forget the past are doom to never evolve to be something better because the past what makes us who we are right now, as we can make lot of mistake now so we can eventually be right in the future.

"Hachiman…" The voice called my name softly, it was a voice I've known since the day I was born, I may not see it during my birth but I can hear it and was well familiar with it. The voice belongs to none other than my mom.

"Oh, it's you…" I briefly said to her as I turned around and face her.

"How're you doing?" My mom asked with a concerning look in her eyes behind the lenses of her glasses.

"What do you mean? I'm fine of course."

"Well, I was worried when you walk out all the sudden."

"Ohh. Sorry about that. Anyway how're things going inside." I asked while looking away from my mom.

"Well, I don't really know but it seems Saruyuki-san started apologizing. Well at least that's what I assumed when she called Haruno over and began bowing her head." My mom briefly explained me the situation of the room. _I guessed that's how it is then, after what my mom did… I didn't have any doubt to her perception._

"Hey, mom…" the bitter taste emerged once more in my mouth as I called her.

"Hmm?"

"Do you think, I made the right choice…you know…what I said…" I casted my gaze down as I didn't want my mom to look at my current expression.

All the sudden, my mom quickly grabbed my hand, and pulled me towards her as she began embracing me.

"Hachiman… even if they think it's wrong, but if you think it's right then its right. Despite everything she said or did to you and the people you care for, you still manage to find it in your heart to do what's right and protect that family from falling apart. I couldn't be more proud of what my son did." My mom began rubbing the back of my head as she was still embracing me; I was touched and surprised by her response to my question.

My mouth tasted even bitter and sour as her words echo in my head, I felt like I was about to break into tears but I can't, I don't want to, I kept swallowing the sob that tried to escape my mouth, but…

"So cry…" My mom briefly said.

"Huh?"

"Hachiman, you really don't have to hide it. You always make that face every time you're about to cry ever since you were small. It's nostalgic, I haven't seen it for quite a while but I still remember that expression when you're about to cry." I looked at her with surprise.

"So please cry, and don't worry about the embarrassment of crying…just dug your face on my shoulder and no one will see you." My mom giggled as she smiled warmly in front of my face.

And so I immediately dug my face deeply on my mom's shoulder and broke into tears as I let out the feelings I contained during my answer to Yukinoshita's father. The feeling that I was holding inside poured itself out heavily into tears from my eyes to her sweater. I began sobbing onto her shoulder as I pressed my face against it, with the hope of no one seeing my current state right now.

"Shhh…shh." My mom whispered softly while stroking my hair with her hand from top of my head until the back of it.

"Thank you…" My voice was disordered and trembling yet I felt happiness. It was the happiest moment I ever felt that's why…

"Thank you…" I repeated while still sobbing softly onto my mom's shoulder as she was still rubbing the back of my head to relax me.

No words could express how grateful I was to have such a great mom who raise me, taught me, care me and love me. Without her, I couldn't possibly solve anything just then, but I did while holding her hand. It's because of her…

That's when I realized, I was never alone, I always had someone with me when I thought I was alone and deal things alone. I was being ignorant because I was used to the fact of being a loner _but I'm glad, that I'm wrong._ I never felt so happy of being wrong in my life. I will always remember this moment between me and my mom as I will always treasured our moment together.

* * *

 **Next bonus chapter: Hebiko Hikigaya wasn't always true to herself.**

 **Basically the next chapter will be a glimpse into Hachiman's mom's past as how she met Yukinoshita's father.**

 **Thank you for reading and please leave a review!**


	10. Bonus chapter part 1

**Before reading this bonus chapter, a bit of a glimpse of what would happen in this story had already been hinted in my previous chapter of the main story "The gather continues as the monster of truth meets the monster of lie." So it is highly recommended if you read the previous chapter before reading this.**

 **There's more to what Hebiko said during her confrontation with Yukinoshita's mother than expected that's why I'm writing this.**

 **So this is a glimpse in the past that would make the previous and the next chapter of the main story clearer.**

 **Btw , I changed the title. The bonus chapter is unexpectedly long so I had to divide into 2 parts. This is 1 out of 2 and the next part I'll try to finish it as soon as possible because this will serve as a hint in the next chapter of the main story and answer some mystery from my previous chapter , also some of the vagueness from fanfic, Oregairu 12. Once I'm done with bonus chapters, I will continue onto the main story.**

 **Enjoy reading it and sorry for any error.**

 **Please leave a review btw :D**

* * *

 **Bonus chapter 1/2: Hebiko Hikigaya wasn't always sure of herself.**

* * *

I wonder,

If regret for an action is something that all people feel or just something that we are taught to feel by the influential figures in our life for doing something they consider wrong.

I personally am inclined to believe that regret for actions is something we are taught,

Because we only feel this emotion when someone or some outside action brings the action under a scrutiny of what they believe is wrong.

Something we wish we had not done something we did or,

Wishing we had done something we have not done.

One of my main regrets in life,

Is giving considerable thought to inconsiderate people.

Therefore,

I have to live up with the guilt for my blind action for that certain man,

But,

It wasn't entirely for him;

It was for the greater good as I thought.

But not without sacrificing what's precious.

What's genuine.

It all happened so fast unexpectedly.

But I always remind myself, kept telling myself,

It wasn't for him.

That way, I won't feel the slightest guilt

Towards my action,

My Regret.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

To work is to lose.

But in my case,

To work means to earn enough money so me, my husband and my one year old child could move out from my parent's house to buy a proper house for us to live in and not to be cramp forever or being a freeloader at my parent.

We've caused enough trouble towards my parent but still we used our own money to buy our own essentials yet that doesn't mean the trouble stops there. My parents have to live up with my child crying all night waking up the entire people in the house, also the stench in the atmosphere from his used diapers piling up in the rubbish bin of the house.

That's why, my mom told me or more likely forced me to work while my dad as usual with his daughter-con behavior told me to just stay and live in their house. Nonetheless, my mom was right; I can't keep causing them trouble and destroy their environment any longer.

My husband already has a job somewhere in the city to begin with, but I consider applying myself one as well. The more people work, the more money earned and the sooner we can get out of my parents' house.

I was interested in journalism; this was why I applied a job in the Chiba media and bulletin bureau. One of the biggest known media company in the district. I was lucky enough to even get a job there thanks to my hard work result and my degree in journalism, communications, and media even though my major was law back from my university days.

But I still wonder if it was right to leave my beloved son for work, my mom insisted that she'll take care of him but she was doing it so we can get out of her house as soon as I should have a little faith in her; she has much experience in taking care of a baby whereas I have zero experience, _but I'm his mother, so shouldn't I be taking care of the baby so I would gain some experience if I were to have a second child?_

My deep thoughts were then interrupted by a sudden shout out.

"Oi Hikigaya!" the man with a loose tie screamed my name from a distance probably from his office as usual, his voice was unusually loud which was normal to him but not to my ears. The man happens to be the head of this company also my superior.

 _That's right, my name was already change to Hebiko Hikigaya since I'm married to my husband which was two years ago? I think._

"Y-Yes chief!?" I startled and stammered as I noticed.

Back then, I wasn't always as harsh and cold as I am now, maybe because I haven't realized reality or how the world works. As they say, the past makes us who we are now, and this was my past.

"When I call you, get straight to my office! Now get over here!"

"Y-Yes!" I stood up from my desk, adjusted my glasses that almost fell off and proceeded to walk to his office.

Murmurings and whispers filled the work place and all of the people's stares inside the work environment were completely focusing at me. The people I crossed with blurted out their comments at me as usual as I was making my way to his office.

"Oh god, what did you do now?"

"Oooh, trouble again Hebiko-chan?"

"Good luck Hikigaya-san!"

I let out a forced laugh followed by a sigh as I finally approached his office. I took a deep breath then made several knocks on his opened door.

"Why're you knocking for!? I called you here!" I slightly jumped and trembled for a brief moment by just his voice.

Truthfully his voice soft or loud would startle anyone, but no one seemed to be startle by it so far except for me, perhaps the people who work here much longer than me have already gotten used to his voice. _I guess that's normal, I don't how I'll ever get used to this._

"Sorry." I briefly apologized to him and slightly bowed my head.

"Close the door." He said and I obediently closed it, as the noises from the work environment outside his office instantly disappear in this soundproof office of his.

The office was quite messy yet it's still how an office would look like. Desk full of files with papers and coffee along with a computer on the side end of his desk. There's also a numerous of file shelves and cabinets contained probably every story that this company had written and published so far. If only I could read it all, then I'll probably gain some experience to write a proper article.

Nervousness and anxiousness began to fill both my mind and soul since I already foresaw the reason he ask for my presence here alone in his office.

"Hikigaya, where's your story?" my superior asked me with a deep yet forceful tone which caused me to flinch.

I was silent and just looked down to the floor, unable to answer him that since I have not been able to get a story this week.

He let out a brief sigh and contorted his mouth as he continued harshly this time.

"You're already three days behind dateline Hikigaya, how many more do you want? I didn't pay you to slack off and space out."

"I...I…" I stuttered and was shaking, nervous. I can't bear to look at him in the eyes.

Before I could either apologize him or answer him, several knocks was made behind the closed door of the office and it slowly opened.

"Yo."

A man greeted us wearing a blue shirt with his sleeves folded upward exposing his arms along with his sport wristwatch. His hair was somewhat messy but despite that, his facial feature was very masculine followed by a goatee.

"Senpai?" I was surprised by his sudden show up in the chief's doorstep.

"Kanto? What are you doing here? I didn't call you." My superior asked angrily to him and he was all calm and didn't startle to his voice like I usually do.

The man who entered the room was none other than my supervisor in charge, my colleague, Tajima Kanto.

"Ah you see, I just came by to give this to Hikigaya. She left it on her desk, must've forgot." Kanto-senpai let out a short giggle, as he closed the door behind him then walked towards my direction and handed me a folder contained few sheets of paper. I opened the folder and quickly flipped a few pages, speed reading the contents. _Wait this is…_

I shot my gazed at him and all he did was wink at me with a grin on his face. _This is his story, I can't take it…_

"That your story Hikigaya?"

"Y-YES!" I ended up saying it out of reflex by his startling voice.

Kanto-senpai let out a chuckled at my reaction. I was annoyed so I shot a glare at him and all he did was grinning his teeth at me. _Honestly…_

The chief closed his eyebrow together and focused his serious gazed at me.

"Really? Sure it's not his?" I flinched as I didn't know what to answer; maybe I should answer him honestly but before I could Kanto-senpai interrupted me.

"Speaking of that, I got mine right here chief." Kanto-senpai took out another folder and laid it on the superior's desk nonchalantly. I did so as well, by instinct.

"Fine, I guess you're off the hook for now, Hikigaya. Next time, try to submit your story on time."

We didn't exchange words any further between the chief and so with no more agendas to discuss any further, we just slightly bow our heads to him and left his office silently.

After Kanto-senpai closed the chief's office door behind us, we just froze with our current position. I looked down on the floor silently with my hand clutching onto my other hand between my legs while Kanto-senpai looked at the ceiling with both his hands placed in his pocket. I was feeling a bit guilty for taking his hard work article just to save myself from being scolded or even worse but he was the one who gave it to me and I never ask him to but still…

We just stood there silently and paralyze in that state then he let out a deep loud sigh that broke the silence between us.

"Man, how long do I have to keep saving your sorry ass?" He asked casually looking away from me while scratching his left cheekbone with his index finger.

"I never asked you to." I mumbled softly still feeling a bit guilty earlier.

"Hey I can't myself. I just had to have such a soft spot for ladies like you." His response caused my face to blushed, and I quickly averted my gaze away from him. _Why did he have to say that…_

Suddenly he patted my head for some reason then began rubbing my shoulder length hair and made a small laugh.

"Heh, look at you at all red like a tomato. How cute."

"Hey stop it!" I retaliated annoyingly at him, and shook my head away from his hand.

"May I remind you that I'm a married woman, and if my husband catches you doing this to me he would surely pound you straightaway." I protested followed by a death threat at him and he looked at me slightly disappointed.

"Jeez, where's that innocent and defenseless lady I saw just now whimpering in the office? Or were you acting like that just to appeal the chief?" Kanto-senpai sarcastically asked, clearly he was referring to me, to which I responded by punching him gently at his arm.

"Hey that hurts…"

"Hah. Serves you right." I made a teasing smile at his direction.

"You can't do that to your supervisor, I could-"

"Could what? Fire me? Ha good luck finding someone 'cute' who'll work along you." I put up a triumphant smile.

That's right, I was the only one assigned to work under his department under his supervision so basically I was his first and only employee or as he likes to refer me as his protégé.

"Still, could you at least do your job properly? It's been 6 months since you've started here, most of your story so far are nothing but irrelevant. You've done nothing but pissing off the chief so far and I had to save your ass every time." Kanto-senpai was whining his complaints at me followed by an exhale of his deep breath.

"What a pain…" He muttered yet I heard it.

"It's not like I wanted to! I didn't sign up to be some detective!" I retorted annoyingly to him.

That's true, I came to this company to apply myself to become nothing but an ordinary journalist writing ordinary story of everyday life happening everywhere but instead, my superior assigned me to be a…

"Investigative journalist." Kanto-senpai corrected me as he look a bit annoyed at my direction.

"It's practically the same!"

"No it's not. Detective does it directly while we do it secretly." Kanto-senpai began wagging his index finger in front of my face while explaining to me the difference between detective and investigative journalist.

"How is having our name on the byline of our respective article secretive?" I added out irritated.

"Only our first name though. So our identity and our family remain safe." He answered me briefly and made several nod with his head while crossing his arms together.

"Still they'll find out one way or another with just our first name. Our names aren't the same obviously." I added a valid statement for my argument.

"So not true! Look at them. Both their first name are Ren." Kanto-senpai pointed his finger towards two random guys by the water dispenser.

I let out and irritated sigh and glared at him with my hand placed on my temple and burst out to him. It seems he strayed off from the topic once more. It's an annoying habit of his.

"I'm talking about us! We're the only two people working under this department!"

The department of investigative journalist only consisted two people. Kanto-senpai and myself.

I continued yelling at him while the people around us did not hear nor noticed or probably didn't care about us as our work environment was very noisy to begin with, they're probably already used to with this kind of environment, with phone's ringing around the room, keyboard typing loudly, loud chattered between fellow employees and the television in high volume for any breaking news. Our loud bantered were probably nothing but the sound of crickets to their ears but honestly, how could anyone even focus or even write an article in such messy and noisy environment?

We continued our bantering for a while. It's kind of normal, and it always occurred every day at every time. Well every time I started doing something wrong I supposed.

After we're done bantering, I proceeded to my seat and just lay my head on my desk resting, trying to clear my head but failed as the noisy and polluted work environment started getting to me. I stared at Kanto-senpai whose desk was across next to mine as he continued his work and started typing on his desktop.

Despite our differences, I was happy to have a supervisor like him along my side.

In terms of job, Tajima Kanto, was regarded as the most top and most respected investigative journalist throughout the media industry of Japan. Every media company was well familiar with him, he's very known. He's been working in this company for eight years. Many of the people around here praised him and told me that I should be honor working with him.

I don't even know if I should…I was always curious of the reason why nobody so far had ever been assigned to work under him aside from myself. Sure he's good-looking. He would be quite a stunner if he only combed his hair, shave his goatee and wear his attire properly.

But aside from looks, he's also kind of a nice guy. Not just because he save me every once in a while or maybe too often but because he's a realist, he never cared how people look at him or think of him, he never cared about people's first impression of him. He's just being himself. That's what I like about him.

He's also tall, and firmed.

He's still at his early thirties and I'm still at my mid-twenties, so there's no big age difference…plus he's single… I guessed it's okay…

 _Wait, what am I thinking!?_

I instinctively placed both my palms on my cheeks to suppress this fluster tingling hot all over my face.

 _Stop it Hebiko! You're a married woman with a one year old child! Shame on you! Shame on you! Shame on you!_

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

The day went by relatively fast as the next day of the morning arrived. I was busy just staring at my desktop on a blank page of the Microsoft word. As usual, I can't come up with any good story to write that's because I hadn't been out in the open to gather enough material with Kanto-senpai for a good story. Maybe I could…

"Oi, don't even think about writing a makeshift story." I startled and turned in reflex at Kanto-senpai as he narrowed his eyes on me. _Is he psychic now?_

"And no, I'm not psychic. It's written all over your face." _Again!?_

"Hikigaya, you should know the chief don't approve a story especially one with no solid proof or evidence to back it up." He explained.

"I know that." I mumbled slightly pouted.

"Maybe you should've gone out with me on an assignment in the first place." He let out a fatigue sigh after.

Usually he'd always asked me out to go on an assignment with him but recently I've been turning down on him and skipping a lot on him for a certain reason.

I glanced at Kanto-senpai, across next to me at his desk that seemed to be working on something as he continuously switched stares between two papers on his hands. His next story perhaps, since he's making that facial expression whenever he's writing about something good, but to me, the story we're writing according to our department…was not something casually good to the world. It's not something I could take lightly of.

"Here's today's paper!" a man threw today's fresh printed bulletin on my table, startling me in the process.

"R-Right. Thank you." I didn't bother to look at it or read so I casted the paper aside from me.

"Hmm? You're not going to read it? It has your story." Kanto-senpai noticed and asked.

"Stop acting. Why would I read a story that's not even mine?" I quickly averted my gaze away from him and casted down on my desk.

"Come on Hikigaya, you should at least have some credit…even though it's…" It's yours? Because it was since he was the one who gave me his story when the boss scolded me in his office yesterday without my approval or permission. Regardless, I appreciated and was grateful but that doesn't mean I should be happy about taking credits of other's handwork.

Everybody in here work hard writing their own story whereas I… my story was served on a platter by senpai. It's not that I don't have a story to write, it's just that… we have to write a story that's relevant to our department. As investigative journalist our stories were mostly base on…

"How bout a drink tonight you and me, huh? whaddya say?"

"How many times do I have to repeat myself, I shouldn't be drinking." I repeated yet again every time he asked me that.

"I didn't mean that, I mean, just accompany me. I could use a friend." He's persistent in persuading me yet…

"Not a chance." I instantly turn down his disgusting offer because what happened the last time I drink with him and it ended up, quite… unpleasant. He began blurted out stuffs, stuffs I shouldn't even be allowed to know.

"Come on"

I flinched as he was now whispering closely at my ear; however his voice sounded nearby to my sensitive ears which caused my skin to crawl. Curiosity had taken over and I slowly turned my head around to where he was, and I froze quickly as his face was surprisingly right next to mine. So close to the point there was no space between my cheek and his. My heart was racing all the sudden.

I tried to stand up from my seat to escape but both his arms were immediately locked on my desk. Both sides of my flanks were occupied by his arms on my desk along with his body occupying my rear seat and even my front was sealed off by the narrow space between my frontal body and the desk preventing me from pitching forward. There was no way out from this position.

 _Talk about wolves at both flanks and tigers at rear. Oh wait, it's actually wolves at the front gate… but that doesn't matter now!_

I could feel his breathing close next to my face which caused my face to further redden and blush itself. My heartrate gradually increases and pounded hard on my chest. _Too close!_

I tried to break free with my strength alone despite the fact that male's strength over exceed females'.

"Hey, get away from me." I struggled trying to remove both his arm from my desk to break out from this inappropriate position.

"Not until you say yes." He giggled.

"Just how desperate are you!?" I exclaimed noisily.

I began running my mouth, spewing out words in an attempt to scare him off so he would release me from such position.

"Get away from me, your invading my personal space. Have you forgotten I'm married; I'll have you know I could take this to the court for harassing a wife. I could even file in and register a restraining order from you." I said in a very quick manner, I probably said all that in just before one second.

"Oooh Hebiko-chan, and Kanto-Kun? How scandalous, shame on you Hebiko-chan." A woman who passed by us made a sly remark along with teasing smile on her face upon seeing our current position.

"Wait that's not-" just as I was about to protect my honor and defend myself, she was gone immediately from my sight.

"Heh, just kidding." Kanto-senpai chuckled

And released my desk from his grasp and walked back to his seat, continuing his work.

"W-What was that for!?" I indignantly asked him.

"Oh, I just want to see how you react that's all." He blatantly answered.

 _That's all? All that shameless action just to see how I react!?_

"What? You expected more?" he asked nonchalantly to which his question caused me to fluster.

"Of course not!" I quickly exclaimed my answer to him while still feeling flustered.

I let out an irritated sigh and tried to continue my work.

Then all the sudden, something heavy laid on my head. As I tried to look up, I stopped once I notice there was a digital camera in front of me in a slanted position with its lens facing directly to me.

"Say cheese!" so it was Kanto-senpai's head that was on top of my head as I could feel his chin moving due to his mouth as he said that.

Before I could react, the camera flashes indicating the picture was taken. My mind was blank but then I quickly came back to my senses with a bit of anger.

"You…" my voice was trembling; my face was clearly blushing hard out of embarrassment mix with a slight of anger.

"Wow your face is so blank, just look at you. Still it's cute." He laughed and started commenting about my unprepared expression on the photo of us he took on his digital camera.

"Give me that!" I tried to snatch the camera from his hand to delete that photo but he held it high taking advantage of his height and my petite height.

"Nah ah, I'll be keeping this photo."

"Fine. Do as you please." I gave up and went straight back to my desk since I had no time or desire to feed his annoying childish behavior and raise his ego in the process.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

As each hour passed by, lunch period was approaching as I watched the hanging clock on the wall tick and tock as its hand moving clockwise with every passing sixty seconds the other hand move by a centimeter or so, waiting for it to hit the digit number twelve of the clock.

As the long hand strikes twelve, this marks the start of lunch time and also the start of my slumber on my desk. Everyone started standing up and head off to lunch in groups and pairs while they chatter their way out of the workplace. Finally I could rest as my brain did not emit anything but static of nothing as I couldn't come up with any story. I hit my head gently on the desk, trying to enjoy the temporary peaceful environment of the empty workplace while it last.

I turned my head over and I could see Kanto-senpai was still sitting on his desk looking through a bunch of documents with numerous of papers piling up his whole desk. He's been at it ever since yesterday and this morning. _Just what exactly is he working on?_

I can't really ask him since he could be paranoid sometimes, so if I do ask him, he might only think I will steal his story but then sometimes he's not because it was only yesterday he gave me his story away just to save my hive from the boss. _Kanto-senpai sure has quite the complex with his personality._

"Oi Hikigaya, aren't you going out to lunch or something?" He asked while his eyes were still focusing on the document on his desk.

"Not really. Hey senpai, what are you working on?" I answered briefly followed by a question while my head still lying on the desk.

"Just… something." He vaguely answered me. The fact that he didn't answer specifically means he doesn't want me to know anything about it.

I guess he's being paranoid again that I might steal his spotlight but then again, he didn't care about spotlight, all he cares about was getting the job done. I always wondered what's his real reason for being so dedicated to this kind of job. Every time I tried asking him, he went silent mode but he looked agitated and anxious. I decided to forget because I didn't want to trample on any of his feelings. Whatever his reason was, it's definitely personal.

"How bout you?" he suddenly asked.

"Huh?" I was confused in what he meant with his question.

"You got any story?" he asked specifically this time. _Oh so that's what he meant._

"Well-"

"Stop. I get it. You don't. So there's no need to beat around the bushes."

 _Then why did you ask!?_

He let out a deep breath and muttered.

"I guess, it can't be help."

He closed the documents that was on his hand and casted it away on his desk. He slowly stood up, and grabbed his ID badge which can only mean one thing; he's going out on an assignment again. Even so, what did he muttered?

"Hikigaya, come on." I blinked my eyes twice blankly as he called out my name.

"Huh?"

"What? We're going out to find a story for you."

My body twitched, I feel myself agitated all the sudden by that subject.

"Actually… can I skip this one? I have to be home early for my child…" I replied along with a forced smile while trying my best not to sound my voice with depression or sadness. I was clearly lying to myself, avoiding going out with him on an assignment due to some reasons.

He stopped and stared at me looking bewildered but I averted my gazed away from him slowly and gazed down on my desk still smiling.

Silence filled the gap between us, but then…

"How about a coffee then?"

I quickly shot my gazed at him with a looked of surprised and he made a small warming concerning smile at me.

I lightly bit my lip and just nodded at him in response.

"Good, come on then." He started walking away from his desk; I immediately grabbed my purse along with my necessary belongings and quickly followed behind him.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

As we arrived to the company's canteen which has its own café, most of the employees from the company usually have their lunches here, outsiders were welcome as well. The café was filled with scent of freshly baked bread straight from the oven, steaming coffee's and tea was seen everywhere on the customer's table and the sound of the crusted bread crunching in the mouths of the customer as they're enjoying their meal while engaging in their conversation with their fellow companion.

We proceeded in taking our seat next to the wide transparent glass window. We both took our seats at opposite sides of each other, after what happened in the office, I was currently not in the mood to be near him. Once we did, we looked over to the beverage menu then a waitress approached us to take our order.

"Good afternoon, what would you like?" the waitress asked with a smile. Consider her feminine voice and her young beautiful appearance; she seems like a high schooler taking a part time job here. Usually around this time, high school students should be having their club activities but I guess she didn't join any clubs. Seems like we both have something in common.

I ignored my thoughts of her and proceeded in placing my order.

"Umm, just coffee please."

"Sugar or milk?" The waitress waited for my choice in sweetening the taste of the coffee.

"Milk." I briefly answered her and she nodded then she switched her gaze to Kanto-senpai who didn't look at the menu but just rested his chin on his hand.

"What about you sir?"

"I'm fine, thanks." Kanto-senpai answered without looking at her and just stared at the scenery of the city outside through the wide window.

The waitress bowed her head and left us immediately to make my order.

As I watched the waitress leaving us, I quickly switched my gaze to Kanto-senpai.

"You're not going to have anything?" I asked, but he stood up from his seat and walked away from the table. I tilted my head and wonder where he was going. _Wait, he's not leaving me right?_

As I continued to observe where he was going, it seems his destination was to the vending machine next the entrance where we entered. He reached out something from his pocket shirt and inserted into the money slip of the vending machine. He pressed a button and vending machine began functioning. I continued to stare at him with my mouth slightly opened.

Kanto-senpai squatted down as he took his purchased canned beverage from the hole below the vending machine. Once he did, he returned back to our table and slams the table softly with his canned beverage. It was a can of MAX COFFEE.

I looked at him with half-opened eyes and made a duck mouth as an expression showing my annoyance at his direction to why I was even surprise.

"Oh, of course. I should've known." I mumbled and abruptly looked away to the city disinterest.

"What? It's the best coffee in town." He said cheerfully and chuckled as he opened the can of MAX COFFEE and started gulping loudly with no manner at all, especially in front of a lady such as myself. I made a look of disgust as he was making such disgusting sound while consuming his beverage.

"Still, you should really stop drinking something out of a can. It's unhealthy. You should drink something raw and fresh." I spoke out my concerned of his health.

"Yeah, yeah quit being such a mom." His response made me slightly irritated but I gave up before our regular argument started.

 _Honestly, is that how you treat someone who cared about your pathetic well-being?_

"That's because I am one." I replied feeling annoyed with his choice of attitude of his response to my concern of him.

We both went silent after. Kanto-senpai was taking his sweet time drinking his can of coffee while fiddling with his phone, as for me, I did nothing but stared at the scenery of the city while waiting for my order.

I rested my chin on my hand as I stared outside. It was a peaceful day, the sky was blue yet partial cloudy but nonetheless the sun was shining at its brightest reflecting its light to every building and the civilians of Chiba city. Several people in the city were walking in groups, reading newspaper and chatting while crossing the streets, I don't know if it's a habit or people just don't care about their safety on the road. The car was strolling on the road at a limited speed, stop and go according to the traffic light. I slowly returned my gaze to the environment of the café and the people in it. The café was filled with cheerful chattered and laughter. It was peaceful time indeed.

"Here you go!" The waitress arrived and enthusiastically laid my steaming cup of coffee gently on the table.

"T-Thanks." She smiled cheerfully in response to my courtesy and left the table straightaway.

 _Ah youth, so energetic and cheerful… at times like this, sometimes I missed being young again._

 _Wait, I'm not old… I'm still at my twenties. Yeah that's it. So the perfect way of saying it is I'm older than her yet generally I'm still young. I supposed…_

I stirred the milk in my coffee, even though it's already dissolve with the coffee but it was because this silence between me and Kanto-senpai was making the atmosphere uncomforting.

It's weird, we always talk a lot but that's because our conversations were mostly arguments over certain matter involved our work. We never had a simple conversation like normal people, as friends. Maybe it's because our relationship was sadly nothing more than just co-workers. So we weren't close enough to share our personal life with one another.

I briefly glanced at him; he was still staring at the scenery of city quietly while holding onto his can of MAX COFFEE. I switched my glance to the people inside the café while still stirring my coffee with the teaspoon, most of them were conversing happily, casually and loudly whereas me and senpai remain silent. A silence surrounded by a communications and interactions of people was unsettling. Unable to stand the silence any longer, I took a small breath…

"Hey uh-"

"Hikigaya, you really don't have to force yourself just to fit in the mood of the café." Said Kanto-senpai nonchalantly as he interject me just as I was about to start a conversation.

"How do you-"

"Lucky guess I guess, but you've been switching stares between me and the people around us."

 _So you've been looking at me while I wasn't looking!? Weirdo!_

"It's human instinct to fit in with the atmosphere, in this case, a café full of conversing customers. But I guess I could understand why you do it; I mean some people kept staring at this silent corner." Kanto-senpai made a small warming laugh which caused me to laugh as well.

Soon the unease atmosphere between us slowly fades by our small petty talk over the unease atmosphere between us.

After we were done laughing moments ago, we started opening ourselves up a bit to each other, talking something that wasn't business or work related but personal matter. Such as…

"Hachi…man?" said Kanto-senpai while looking a bit bewildered as I revealed him my beloved son's name.

I took a sip of my coffee before making a response to his bewilderment.

"Yes."

"If I may, why did you name him that?" asked Kanto-senpai. I placed my hand on my chin trying to recall why I named my son that in the first place.

"Perhaps… it's because he was born on the eighth day of the eighth month, thus where Hachi originated." _I think so… I guess._

Kanto-senpai immediately crossed his arms and leaned back to his seat while looking up like he was thinking of something.

"I guess that makes sense though, but what about the 'man'? I mean just Hachi is already good enough."

 _That's a good point though, why did I add the word 'man'?_

I continued trying to recall the reason for that additional word to my son's name, and then Kanto-senpai made a small laugh which interrupted my train of thought causing me to shift my attention to him.

"The way you name your son, as if you think he's some kind of living number, heh."

"Please refrain yourself from insulting my son. It's absolutely unforgiveable." I shot a glare at him for just a brief moment before averted my gaze from him.

"I was just simply stating the truth!" he tried defending his statement.

"I might consider a silent treatment on you."

"Oh come on! That's harsh!"

I wasn't really considering it though, I was just teasing him. However, I was glad that we get to have normal conversations like this.

Silence fell upon us once more, but this time, it wasn't as unsettling as before. After our conversations, our silence was somewhat peace and comfortable. The void radiated warmth between us making the silence quite relaxing.

I made a small smile to myself.

I took a sip of my coffee again, yet the taste becomes bitter as the warmth from it faded.

"Hey…umm."

I gazed at Kanto-senpai who was trying to say something. He looked rather anxious and hesitant to continue; also he was currently scratching his left cheekbone with his finger. Usually when he does that, it means he's embarrassed about something. But what?

"Yes?" I said.

"Could you… uh…take off your glasses?" he asked in embarrassment.

I made a small laugh with my hand placed on my mouth due to his current state caused by a mere small request.

"Did I say something funny?" he began flustering, it was written all over his face.

I shook my head gently saying it's nothing but it's definitely something.

"You could've just said so." I replied him warmly and made a smile trying to ease him down a bit. I cleared my throat and wondered…

"But why?" I asked, I was curious to know his reason for requesting me to take off my glasses. I found it a bit strange.

"Just take it off, okay? We're off duty and it's not like we're facing a blue screen or something."

His response caused me to pout.

Clearly he was bluffing and evades his true reason rudely since he answered while looking away in embarrassment but still an unacceptable choice of attitude to be making such demands. Rude but reasonable, I guessed I'll oblige his request. For now… he could've at least said please or pleaded nicely…

I let out a sigh before reaching out my hands to my specs and gently took it off. I put away my glasses on my pocket shirt while feeling flustered for some reason but I strongly suppress it and stiffly looked at Kanto-senpai with my bare naked face.

He stared at me blankly yet he was examining my face as he gaped sharply on my eyes. He leaned himself forward from his seat to get a closer inspection of my face, this caused my face to redden in blush and I slowly averted my eyes away from him.

"Wow." His first word that came out from his mouth upon looking at my current face surprised me. Suddenly speculations, ideas and assumption of what his next line were, started filling my heads. _Is he impressed? Does he think I'm…. beautiful?_

"They were right…"

I turned my eyes back to him and stared at him with my face still blushing,waiting, hopefully for compliments.

"Your eyes really are scary when they're bare."

I quickly dropped both my shoulders and gaze immediately on the table. His unexpected comment was dissatisfying, disappointing, and insulting. _It seems I had my hopes high. He's just the same…_

The reason why I was wearing specs in the first place wasn't because I have poor vision but it was of that reason. My eyes were very intimidating, that if a child so much took a glance at me glasses off, they would instantly cry while other people tried to avoid from looking at me directly in the face as much as possible. So by wearing these non-degree glasses, only that could conceal the fear radiating from my eyes to others.

I lifted my head up and let out an irritated sigh at his direction.

"Seriously, how does your husband wake up to that every morning?" he asked nonchalantly.

"I wonder…" I briefly answered him only that while still sulked about his earlier comment.

Well actually,he woke up much early than me and left to work before I even woke up… his workplace is a fifteen minute drive from home, _but what's bugging me is why he left to work 2 hours before the starting shift? I feel pathetic for some reason…_

Kanto-senpai chuckled and continued.

"Man, your eyes really do live up to your namesake." He made a cheerful grin while I stared at him annoyingly as he continued his insult on me.

I let out a deep breath and retaliate the comments he made about my eyes so far.

"Look, I can't help it alright. I was born with it, so if you're going to continue your insult about my eyes I might as well put back-"

"Nope."

Just as I was about to put on my specs, Kanto-senpai quickly snatched my glasses from my fingers.

"Hey what are… give me back my glasses!"

Every time I leaned forward to try to take my glasses from his grasp, he'd pull back his hand and evade my hand from snatching back my glasses.

"This isn't funny; you're going to cause a scene. Give me back my glasses." I said as I was getting frustrated with his childish behavior and desperately tried to get my glasses back as soon as possible.

At this rate our petty scuffle over my glasses would attract the attentions of the customers in the café… _and what I dislike the most is: making a scene in a populated area._

"Ha, you're one to talk, then stop trying to take it from me." he replied.

"It would be much simple if you would just hand it to me." I said tiredly as I made another attempt to snatch it but he evaded my hand swiftly.

Suddenly the sound of a phone's ringtone made its way to both our ears coming from senpai's pocket shirt. Kanto-senpai turned his eyes and focus to it by reflex. _Now's my chance!_

I quickly leaned myself forward from my seat, and tried my last attempt to snatch my glasses as quick as I can while his focus was on his ringing phone. In just mere seconds, I managed to take my glasses back from his hand in a flash before he even realized it.

 _YESS! VICTORY!_

I made a fist pump before putting back my glasses followed by a smirk on my lips at his direction to express my victory over Kanto-senpai.

He gazed with a slightly annoyed expression and clicked his tongue while I continued smirking triumphantly.

He turned his attention back to his ringing phone. As he pulled out his phone, then answered it.

"Hello? Oh you're here already?" I made a blank expression at his direction as I listened to his conversation with his caller. Was he inviting a friend to join our coffee time?

"Yeah. Okay." with those last few words, he closed his phone and returned it to his pocket shirt.

"Umm, who was that?" I asked.

"An associate." He answered while looking away from me.

"Ah, I didn't know you're going to invite someone." I quietly pouted but he didn't respond to me. All he did was staring at the café entrance with a serious look.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

While waiting for his, associate, I finished what's left of my cold coffee while gazing blankly at the scenery of the city. Even at this time the café remained crowded but the customer wasn't as rowdy as earlier, the café was submerged in somewhat a relaxing atmosphere in the air with the customer still chattering peacefully.

Suddenly at the corner of my eyes, Kanto-senpai raised his hand up high for some reason. Perhaps he was calling a waiter or probably his associate had arrived. I turned my head around to find out the answer to my question, once I did I saw a man standing near the entrance who probably just entered the room as he was examining the surrounding of the café. The man seemed pretty old in appearance wearing a business suit along with a loose tie. He's tall but not as tall as Kanto-senpai by the looks of it; he made a slight wave at our direction and started walking towards our table, which confirmed my answer. I guessed this must be the associate senpai mentioned about.

As he approached our table, he stopped in front of our table and he started off with a simple greet of,

"Good afternoon."

"Ah, good afternoon to you too." I responded his greet with a sincere smile giving off my good impression to him at first meet.

Kanto-senpai only nodded at him slight disinterested.

The man turned his gaze to Kanto-senpai.

"Ah you must be Tajima Kanto, it's a pleasure to meet you." He said to Kanto-senpai and bowed his head to him. _Say why didn't I get a bow?_

"Yeah yeah, let's just skip the introductory and begin the interview." Kanto-senpai's words caused me to flinch and taken aback.

"I-Interview? Senpai who is this?" I asked while switching my stares between Kanto-senpai and his associate ominously and confused.

"Your story." Answered Kanto-senpai which caused something to clench my heart. I lightly bit my lips and casted my eyes down. I feel disappointed, hurt.

"Hikigaya, begin the interview."

I quickly came back to my senses, and ignored the bitter feeling I've had within me right now and focused at the task at hand.

"Right, please take a seat." I said to the fellow associate and he obediently took his seat next to senpai. I tried my best to look compose, and prevent myself from shredding a single emotions within me right now to my face and voice.

I pulled out my digital recorder from my purse to record every detail of the story he had leaving his lips.

And without further ado, I began interviewing him for my next scoop of my story as an investigative journalist.

As we I began interviewing him, I asked the necessary questions which was,

Who,

The subject was.

What,

Was his action.

How,

Do you know of this?

Why,

Such action

And

Where,

The scene of happening.

Those entire questions asked for one specific thing.

As an investigative journalist, we interview an individual for

One reason,

On

One subject,

With

One objective,

To expose, corruption.

As an investigative journalist, our main role was to expose corruption, wrong doing and hypocrisy. The main function of these was to reveal the truth, to root out facts many people often want to keep hidden, to re-establish fairness, to shine light in dark places.

Truthfully, I had no problem in doing interviews and extracting information, but what I find it wrong in all these was the reason why I've been skipping a lot of my assignment from Kanto-senpai. I know our job was about truth and justice, yet there was something wrong with this kind of job, that very reason was unbearable, made my heart unsettling, and made the whole line of work, wrong in my eyes.

It's because of that reason; I lost grasp of moral, confused between right and wrong. Maybe, it's because my whole character and this job wasn't very… compatible.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Roughly about over thirty minutes had passed, and I've finally conclude my interview with the associate, as he stood up from our table and slightly bowed his head before leaving us and left the café. I was left alone with Kanto-senpai once again in the café as we remained seated silently.

I slowly put away my digital recorder which already contained information of what he witnessed and discovered. Apparently like everything other else we interview, the associate happens to be an employee from a large department store around the city, and he claims that his manager of that large department store was engage in an illegal trade activity of merchandise as in, drugs.

Once I put away my recorder, I glanced at Kanto-senpai and casted my eyes down from him immediately.

"You lied to me." I briefly said with my voice slightly trembling.

"I didn't exactly lie. I said I'd bring you to coffee and here we are now." He replied nonchalantly.

"You baited me here."

He brought me to this café as an excuse to hid away his true agenda which was our job. I thought we were having a nice friendly chat out of work for once, but I was wrong. He had an ulterior motive. He lured me here so I can do my job, my interview with his associate.

"Hey, you lied too. You said you have to be home early for your child yet you don't look like you were in any rush since you could've just left earlier."

I flinched out of surprise by his statement.

"But we both know that's just an excuse so you can and skip these interviews like any other day. You're just easy to read Hikigaya, you should come up with new excuses rather than using the same excuses all over. It's that obvious." He continued.

I was always amazed about how Kanto-senpai was able to make quite an accurate analysis. I gripped my hands underneath the table as he was right about me. I've been lying, using false reasoning to skip my assignment with Kanto-senpai lately.

Kanto-senpai let out a sigh.

"Plus, I thought, since you won't go out with me to get a story, I might as well make the story come to you." He said as he sips his MAX COFFEE.

"And you got your story, now get to it."

I quickly retorted him.

"B-But, this isn't even a story. These are just mere speculations, what he claims. There's no evidence or proof to confirm his speculations is true." I tried being reasonable with senpai but what he said next, made my heart wrench.

"True but that doesn't mean we can't write about it on the paper to draw the truth out." He casually said.

"Wh-What?"

"If we publish this kind of speculations to the public, rumor surround him will start, people will talk and once that rumor quickly spreads people will be onto him, investigating him, pressuring him, forcing the truth to come out from his dirty mouth."

 _How could he say that so casually?_

I attempt to argue with him, to prevent such speculations to be published in public.

"And what if in the end, it isn't true? Huh? What would that do to his reputation, his image? People would look at him differently." I tried to sympathize with him as I began lashing out words at him.

"Then maybe the guy shouldn't have done what he did to make people assume that kind of speculation of him in the first place." He mumbled.

"Still, what we're doing is practically lying! Spreading false rumor, damaging his image whether it be truth or lie. And for what?" I continued protesting him.

"For the truth, and lying to expose the truth is dirty yet a very effective tactic. Act like you know everything; lure them with a lie to bait them so the truth would slip out from their mouth. Keep that in mind." He responded me so casually so calm that it was wrong.

Does he ever have the slightest guilt of what he's doing? Does he ever think before going through with it? Does he even have a shred of leniency in his heart?

These were one of the few reasons; I've been skipping a lot of my assignment with Kanto-senpai. I didn't want to see this kind of side from such a nice person. How could he be so nice yet his words and action were so harsh? It's heart-wrenching and wrong. How could he be so heartless towards society?

But nonetheless, I still have my rights.

"Then I refuse to make such rumors." I responded vigorously and glared at him.

He began glaring at me as well after I made such response to him.

"What?" he asked coldly.

"I…refuse." I repeated in a calming yet my heart wasn't.

"Do you even realize what you're refusing?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Hikigaya, when you see something wrong, you can't just leave it be. Otherwise people around would also get affected."

"I know and what is wrong right now, is you. That's why I'm doing something by refusing to make rumor of him, I'm incline to let society assume that false rumor and ruin that person by unconfirmed speculations. So I refuse to write such story. Until we can find solid proof then…" There was no hesitation in my respond to him; I was merely stating what felt was right to me. I know we can't let our emotions affect our work and judgement, but even so, we're still human.

"Then what will you write huh? You have no other story than this." He replied.

"I'll come up with something." I answered trying to sound as confident as I can.

"That's funny coming from the lady who had her ass saved every time because she has no story." He responded harshly and coldly with a sharp tone.

I tried to keep myself strong and composed as I respond him.

"Like I said, I never asked you too."

"Then don't expect something from me next time."

"I won't."

With nothing left to say, there wasn't any point for me to stay with him. Just as I was about to stand up and leave the table, a loud voice suddenly made its way and interrupted the calm atmosphere of the café.

"OI OI! Look who do we have here?"

"That name on your nametag. You're that daughter of that lawyer right? The one who got arrested for bribing a judge to overlook his client's trial. Right?" the man on the left of the waitress spoke out loudly. _Was that even necessary?_

"That's what's always wrong with you filthy riches. Always use money to get yourself out. You ought a feel ashamed of yourself and your father." The other man began scolding the waitress. _Why are they making such scene? Can't they take this somewhere else?_

It seems the waitress was another victim. A victim by both her father and us investigative journalist who exposed his father's corruptions and as a result, her father was arrested along with her family name tainted and hated by society. It's because of this job, and her father wrong doing that we made their private life exposed to the public eye. But it's wrong to take it out on their family yet, ultimately it was us that made the society looked at them that way.

I never recall writing such story about a corrupted lawyer, Kanto-senpai was probably the one who wrote the article. As usual.

 _Just what I needed more. I'm in bad mood already because of senpai and those guys just keeps putting more oil into my fire._

The waitress squirmed, and was visibly trembling between them. I couldn't stand the sight of her getting bullied by her father's wrong doing. She's innocent, so they shouldn't be throwing their anger at her, yet those guys…

I clenched my fist and gritted my teeth in anger as I quickly and furiously stood up from my seat and attempt to stop this.

"Oi, Hikigaya, what're you doing?" Senpai noticed and whispered at me.

But I ignored him because I was still having grieves from him and tried to stop those two men from humiliating that waitress any further. I wanted to show senpai I could stand on my own two legs, I really don't need him to hold my hand everytime there's trouble. Plus we both made it clear that we won't expect a helping hand from each other.

"Hey!" As I burst out loudly in anger to them to halt their action, the crowd in the café quickly turned their heads in reflex and attention to me.

I flinched as I noticed their stares were focusing at me.

"S-Stop…it?" I froze instantly by so many eyes pointing at my existence.

 _Please stop staring at me please stop staring at me!_

As I said before, I dislike making scenes that's because it was something I experienced back in my high school days.

I was being put in a play on behalf of my class for our cultural festival. I played little red riding hood, and as I was in the stage, I completely forgot what I remembered from the script and because of that, the crowd stared at me, waiting for me to say something, all eyes were completely focused on me but I was shaking and trembling and quickly froze on the spot. This experience developed into a trauma and for that I never wanted being in a play again or make such scene that would attract attention of a crowd and cause so many stares focusing at me.

But right now,

I let my anger clouded my mind that I completely forgot the café was still populated with customers and because of my reckless action, the crowds were now staring at me, waiting for me to do something but I can't, not with all these eyes pointing at my single existence. My very body was frozen solid.

The two men that I shouted made a look of confusion to my frozen state.

"Hikigaya, you okay?" Kanto-senpai murmured in concerned as he noticed my state as well.

I wanted to answer him and turned around to him but I can't, because I was currently too traumatized to even move or talk.

 _Senpai! Help!_

"Oi you guys, leave that young waitress alone." Senpai shouted softly at the two men on my behalf.

Even though I said I won't expect his help yet he still helped me, I was very grateful yet guilty. I said earlier that I won't expect his help yet I still needed him. I guessed we both weren't really sure of ourselves. Maybe I was just being too harsh on him earlier. I'll remember to apologize to him when I'm not a stone anymore.

"Ah, who's that… oh Kanto it's you!" he said and made a smile at our direction.

"Sup Kanto?" the other man spoke up as well.

"Huh?"

Judging by senpai's response, it seems he doesn't know those guys but they know him. As expected senpai's pretty famous after all. As I further inspect those two men with just my eyes while still frozen, I noticed they're wearing ID badges that looked the same as me and senpai's, so it seems they're employees in the same company as well.

The two men alternate their stares between me and senpai back and forth as they quickly judged us and made their conclusion of us.

"Woot, and you're with a lady!"

"You're girl Kanto?"

 _Absolutely not! I'm taken already! Even if I were single, I won't be with such vermin like him! If I'm not frozen right now, I would shout my answer to you buffoons._

"Ah, her? No. she's just my worker." Kanto-senpai answered them.

 _Ha, a wise answer._

"Oh…" the two men then turned their gazes to me.

"Then you must be Hebiko!" the two men chuckled and smiled while the waitress still between them look confused.

The ice that froze me solid instantly melted away the moment they mentioned my name.

"Ha? They know you Hikigaya?" Senpai turned to me and asked me in a whisper.

 _Of course they know me you idiot. Who else is working in your pitiful department? Quit being so dense._

Although, now the tension in the atmosphere earlier had lessen and the hassle between us and the two strangers in front of us seemed to reduce to a normal conversation, the customers of the café averted their attention away from us and continued engaging their activities. However, they still haven't released the young waitress from their non-contact grasp.

"H-Hebiko."

I startled and look to the waitress who called my name all the sudden, but her eyes there was sadness behind those widened eyes of hers, her mouth distorted and she was visibly trembling.

"Then you're the one who took my dad…"

Her trembling voice flinched me out of shock, I couldn't comprehend her statement. I was slightly confused by what she meant.

"He tried to help my uncle, and yet you took away both of them." The waitress's whole body was shaking, her hands gripped tightly on the white ceramic tray she was holding onto.

"What is she…" I mumbled to myself, trying to figure out her puzzling vague statement but was soon answered by one of the two men between her.

"Huh? You didn't know? It was on the paper this morning." the man casually answered me.

"This morning?" I asked and the other man next to the waitress answered me with a shocking revelation. As they answer specifically.

"How could you not know? You're the one who wrote it." I was surprised and I tried asking again as I was still confused. I didn't write anything recently.

"When did I…"

Just before I asked them, I was quickly shocked with what I remembered. I remembered that story, that article. I've read it recently not too long ago but it wasn't mine, it was Kanto-senpai's story until he gave it me when I was called to the chief's office about a day ago. His story became mine and now the waitress thinks I'm the one who exposed her father.

"Wait-"

Just as I was about to respond her, she furiously threw her tray on the floor and quickly ran out of the café in tears.

The right arm that I extended to explain her didn't reach as she left me, so I weakly dropped my arm and my gaze to the floor. I was trembling, I clenched my fist tightly.

"Hikigaya…" Senpai murmured behind me, and with that, I quickly ran from him.

"Wait! Hikigaya!"

I didn't stop for a second to turn to him and give him a chance to speak; I was deeply angry and quickly push the door of the entrance and left him in the café. He didn't bother to chase me as there were no steps could be heard chasing me from behind. I felt like I wanted to cry yet my head was filled with anger to even break into tears.

It's because of him, no, he was merely only tried to save me from getting scolded by the chief. This was my fault. If I hadn't been too dependent on him to save me every time I didn't have a story, if I hadn't been too scared to do my job, if only I would be more like senpai, none of this would've happen.

There's no doubt my anger wasn't towards anyone but myself. No one really was at fault except me.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

I slowly stop running as I approached towards the front entrance of the company I work in. I panted and began to breathe in some air I've lost from running non-stop. I raised my specs for a bit to wipe any tears forming on my eyes unnoticeably before putting it back on and adjusted it. I recomposed myself, trying to keep calm as I entered the building and proceeded in heading towards the elevator.

I pressed the button of my designated floor and the elevator began descending at a slower speed. I was still in a daze of what happened in the café, my conversation that turned into a grieving intense argument with Kanto-senpai and also I couldn't forget the horrifying expression of the waitress and the look in her eyes the moment when she found out about the person who held responsible for having both her father and uncle exposed and arrested despite the fact I never even wrote the article to begin with yet it still was my story that I accepted from senpai so I had to live with that, I have no right to blame or even be mad at Kanto-senpai for helping me.

I was planning on to apologized to Kanto-senpai later, also the waitress if I ever visit the café next time, but not right now, not in this current state.

As I arrived to the designated floor, I proceeded walking through the workplace to the direction of my desk. I feel so empty right now, my head was feeling light; I feel like my soul had been pulled out from me and just left me with an empty shell dragging it along to my work station. I turned my head around, inspecting the people in the area, the workplace seemed less crowded than this morning, it's probably because some people were working only half day today whereas me and the rest of the slaves in here have to work our butt off until late afternoon or until our work was complete since anyone was welcome to stay in the building as they like just as long as they have the permission from the chief. I heard some even brought a futon in here as they were planning on working overnight. I let out a small forced laugh at myself just by thinking about it, trying to forget what happened earlier but the bitter feeling still lingers in me as I continued walking myself to my desk.

Then, a woman stood in front of me stopping me at my tracks. It was someone whom I see as my advisor whenever I was having any issue. It's Tomoya-senpai.

"Yohoo! Hebiko-chan, I was looking for you." She cheerfully asked me loudly ignoring the stares of the people around her. She skipped her way towards me.

Unlike me, Tomoya-senpai had a job as a sport journalist. So mostly her article was about anything related to sport. There was no pressure at all on that job and all you could do was write about it without giving a second thought…without hurting anyone.

What I admired about Tomoya-senpai was not just her ability in sweetening the mood in the atmosphere but also her perfect, curved figure especially around the chest. Compare to mine, she's about the size of a watermelon. Everyone in the workplace always stared at her with a perverted look on their faces. Fantasizing about her, how typical of men.

I always envy about things she have that I don't, always cheerful, happy, like there's no problem in the world and aside from her personality, when it comes to appearance. Her fairly light smooth skin, brown short hair, along with those slender legs behind her tight business trouser. Despite her inappropriate attire, overall she's an ideal woman to the many eyes of men.

"Umm, yeah. Hello Tomoya-senpai." I forced myself to smile as I greet her yet, somehow my lips couldn't helped itself from being distorted as the images of the café keeps flashing in my mind and so I dropped my gaze, to prevent Tomoya-senpai from making out my expression.

"Hmm? Something wrong Hebiko-chan?" Tomoya-senpai asked as she noticed my casted down sorrowful expression. I forced a smile and lifted my head up as I answered her,

"It's nothing. Just work as usual."

She looked at me blankly thinking of a way to respond to my answer. I didn't wait and just walked pass her still with a smile on my face. I soon forget to as why she even approached me in the first place.

"It must be hard isn't it?" she spoke up which caused me to stopped my tracks.

"For someone like you to be doing that kind of job?" I didn't look at her when she responded me; we probably stare at opposite direction while exchanging these small words. Her voice was calm yet her statement was deep. I understood her reference.

 _Someone like me…_

Most people described me as a very nice person, caring, looking out for people and some even refer to me as a saint for possessing such traits. These were their expectations of me, but nonetheless, they were right accurate.

That's why, the reason why Tomoya-senpai made that statement was because we both can't imagined someone with that kind of personality, to be working in a job that involves under looking corruption, ruined the lives other, breaking families apart by their individual wrong doing, tainting their name by exposing one of their family member's corrupted action to society.

A character so bright and nice with a job that's dark and harsh. A complete bipolar opposite.

Someone so nice to be doing something so dark…contradicting their whole character and persona whereas, Kanto-senpai, he had never ever doubt his actions, he never gives any second thoughts before writing an article that would expose an individual's privacy to the public eyes. He never thought about the aftermath once he published his story. We're completely the exact opposite of one another.

"Hey, Tomoya-senpai. How could Kanto-senpai be-"

"So heartless?"

She continued and finished my sentences but that's not exactly what I wanted to ask yet it's the same meaning but just in different words, and so I reacted quickly trying to defend my senpai as I turned around to Tomoya-senpai,

"No that's not-"

Then she stopped my running mouth with a finger on my lips as she stood in front of me.

"It's okay Hebiko-chan. I think we both think the same way about him, am I right?" said Tomoya-senpai as she gently pulled her finger back from my lips followed by a warm smile.

I think for a moment then nodded as an agreement that she's right.

She folded her arms and looked up, thinking of a way to answer my question.

"Hmm, maybe it's just that you both have a different perspective towards this job."

There's no doubt we do have a different perspective, sometimes I disagree with how he does things because it was too cruel too harsh.

"Seems that way, but unlike him, I always think about the people, always looking out for them. Always think ahead of what would happen if Kanto-senpai does what he does. I just can't help it." I said as I dropped my gaze from her.

She let out a chuckled and made a response to my statement.

"Yeah, I guess you can't. That's so like you anyway Hebiko-chan. Since all you can do is think about the aftermath of what would happen if Kanto-kun did what did, but have you ever thought about the aftermath if he doesn't do anything at all?"

I immediately startled by her question. I guessed I never ever thought about it.

"Tell me, Hebiko-chan. What does your job do?" she asked me a basic question about investigative journalist.

"Well, obviously under looking for corruptions mostly, I guess."

"And what do you do with it?" she continued asking me.

"Hmm, expose them to the public." I answered her. That answer may be right to the question but I think it's wrong to expose it to the public eyes. I mean, what would that do to their family, the people who're close to them? After what happened in the café, the waitress was the living proof of it.

"Good good. But why do you need to expose it to the public?"

"That's a hard one." I mumbled but I tried to answer according to what Kanto-senpai answer me during we first met.

"To show the world, there's still justice and fairness in the world." I answered.

"Huh?" Tomoya-senpai looked at me with a wearily expression.

 _Yes I know, the way he put his answer is so childish but still that's the best way to phrase it._

Tomoya-senpai burst into laughter and my face began blushing out of embarrassment for answering her question with such childish answer.

"That's so definitely Kanto-kun's answer but still, it's true though."

She let out a sigh and looked at the window next to her with a calm expression as the air keeps entering and escaped her glossy lips.

"You may know it already Hebiko, that the world is a corrupted place. Because of that, the world is broken."

I silently looked at her and listen.

"Imagine if Kanto-kun never did anything, never expose those people, and never bring them to justice. Imagine how much broken the world would be, over run by corruptions."

"Corruptions, dishonesty, Discriminatory, these things does nothing but hurt the people around here who followed by the rules as they believe in what's right. So all we have to do is hurt them, but not by giving them a taste of their own medicine."

"But by exposing them, by hurting them with the truth. Truth is the most powerful weapon to pick out from the arsenal."

"So maybe that's what Kanto-kun wanted, to purify the world from the taint of corruption. To hurt the injustice with truth before they hurt more by lies and corruption."

I never see it that way, I never once tried to position myself in Kanto-senpai's perspective, never tried understanding him because I thought he was selfish and only think about his job, did only because it's work, but in truth, I never realized how many he saved by exposing the corrupted. I felt slightly guilty now after seeing it that way. Still, I was still wondering why he took this job in the first place; I always wondered why he was so driven to seek the truth, such dedication to this kind of job… I know because of what Tomoya-senpai said but still, I think there's more to it.

"Hey, uh, do you know why he take it… I mean why choose this career?" I stammered and a bit hesitant asking her since Kanto-senpai himself agitate to that question.

"That's something you need to ask him for yourself." Said Tomoya-senpai with a gentle warming voice.

"Even so…" He never even did try to answer me even if I ask him a dozen times. Maybe because we weren't close enough to share such personal privacy with one another.

"Just wait for the right time to ask him…ooooor, you could just use your womanly charms on him." Tomoya-senpai's nonchalant teasing remark caused me to fluster.

"Eh!? What are you talking about, I'm married and why would I be with a guy like him!?" I retorted to senpai while still flustering.

She laughed shortly at my reaction and immediately put up a warm smile at my direction followed by reassuring words leaving her lips.

"So until then Hebiko-chan…"

"Just hang in there." She made a few taps on my right shoulder before walking away from me.

But then I remembered something.

"Hey, uh wait." I called out to her.

She paused and turned her head to me in reflex.

"Why were you looking for me anyway?" I asked.

"Oh! Right I almost forgot. There's a man waiting by your desk. Your husband perhaps, I don't know but he's quite the stunner."

 _My husband? Shouldn't he be at work right now?_

Tomoya-senpai then started to walk away but not without blurting something that would cause me to flustered once again.

"Try not to make out Hebiko-chan but if you do, do it as quiet as possible okay?" She made a gentle wave of her hand while walking at the opposite direction from me. I always wondered how she was able to blurt out that kind of stuff in public so nonchalantly. She's really quite presumptuous.

Anyway, I wondered why my husband suddenly showed up to my workplace. It was rather rare for him to skip his beloved work just to see his wife. He could've just texted me if he wanted to drop by but still it's sweet of him to visit me at a time when I needed him the most. Maybe a wife's damsel in distress reached the husband's heart. After what happened, I could use a husband's love to cure the anguish inside me. I bet he wanted to surprise me. I giggled as I quickly broke into smile just by the thought of it and started walking slowly but gradually quicken my pace to my desk due to my excitement.

He probably doesn't know that I was already informed of his presence thanks to Tomoya-senpai, so I might as well surprise him too. I couldn't wait to see what expression he would make when I startle him.

As I approached my desk, I turned around the corner of the free standing wall, as I jumped in and immediately say,

"Good afternoon dear!" I quickly said out loud in excitement.

"Huh?"

"Eh?"

 _This isn't my husband…_

We stared at each other blankly followed by an awkward atmosphere filling the silence between our stares.

I quickly lowered my head into a bow.

"I'm so sorry!" I apologized to the stranger before me sitting at my desk with a blushing face. My face couldn't stop blushing in embarrassment.

 _How embarrassing! I let my excitement get the best of me… I should've check before blurted out to a stranger!_

"Ah, that's fine." The stranger gesture his hand telling me it's no big deal.

As I raise my head to look at him, this man… he looked so young. I wondered if he's a high schooler yet he wasn't wearing any uniform from any high school except a formal business-like suit. His appearance seemed too young to be wearing such attire. Still, he's good-looking, a fairly white skin, brown hazel piercing eyes, well combed hair with a visible jaw as well as his cheekbones showed how masculine his facial features were.

 _Tomoya-senpai was right; this guy really is a stunner…_

My stare continued to be fixated on his perfect facial structure, I felt like I was doze with something or somewhat drunk as I couldn't stare away and just spaced out at his face.

But I couldn't help to feel that I've seen him somewhere before, the paper? On the news? All I know he was someone important but I couldn't pinpoint why.

"Umm, excuse me." Even his voice was deep that it didn't fit in with his appearance.

"U-Um yes?"

"Sorry, but mind if you don't stare at me like that?" he averted his eyes away from me as soon as he noticed my fixated stare.

I began blushing once more, and bowed my head again.

"So-Sorry!" I repeated.

"Just, don't repeat it okay." he said.

I lifted my head as he was still sitting on my desk, so composed, so calmed.

"Umm, may I help you with something?" I asked.

"I don't require your assistance." He replied and didn't bother looking at me while responding my kind gesture. My eye twitched.

 _That's a bit… rude…_

"May I ask what're you doing here?" I asked nicely and force a smile trying my best to not let his rudeness get to me but my eye was still twitching.

"It's none of your concern."

 _Then get off my desk!_

I was slightly irritated by his response to my courtesy towards him. But I continued to force myself to smile. I wanted to ask him to get off my table but the aura radiate from him tells me not to. Something about this guy feels slightly off. It's as if we're not on the same level of each other.

Then I looked over at senpai's desk and maybe…

"Are you perhaps, looking for Kanto-senpai?" I asked

"Huh? You know Tajima Kanto?" he gazed at me with a look of surprised.

For some reason I couldn't helped but smirking at myself.

"Well of course, I do work under him." I said with a boastful tone of a voice. I felt rather cocky after admitting it.

"Do you know where he is?" he hurriedly asked.

 _Is senpai that important?_

Since Kanto-senpai hasn't arrived yet to his desk, he's probably still at the café, hopefully coming up with ways to apologize to me or he's just busy pitying himself for what he done to me. _Now I'm just being egotistical…_

So the only answer I can respond to his question was,

"He'll be on his way."

 _I hope._

"So in the meantime, just wait there." I smiled and pointed him to Kanto-senpai's desk so I could take my seat back at my desk.

"Oh I apologize, I didn't realize this was your seat to begin with." He quickly stood up and slightly bowed his head to me. It was rather satisfying I must say. Finally the brat showed some courtesy.

"It's fine." I said.

"Thank you for accepting my apology, Hebiko-san." he said and smiled at me warmly.

I could feel myself slightly blushed.

"Umm…"

"Your ID badge."

He pointed at my ID badge around my neck. Of course I already realized I was wearing it and I noticed he knows my name by my ID badge but still, that wasn't the point because that's not my last name he called me with. It's a policy that people under the investigative department only had their first name written on their ID badge while their last name was concealed for safety purposes.

And since it's a policy I can't avoid, as much as I didn't want to, I guess I'll let him address me by my first name. It still doesn't feel right though for another man aside from my husband to call me by my first name. _Still, rules are rules._

I crossed my arms and averted my gaze away from him.

"Oh, sorry. I guess it was rude of me not to introduce myself since I already know your name." He said while putting a wearily smile on his face. Even so, that's not the reason why I was averting though.

He bowed his head again. He slowly lifted his head up from bowing and gazed at me with a smile as he introduced his name before me.

"Anyway…" He lifted his hand in front of me, waiting for a handshake.

"My name is Fuyuki…Yukinoshita."

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Not everything's perfect, especially in the beginning.

I used to remind myself, it's all right to have a little bit of regret every once in a while. It's when you feel it all the time and can't do anything about it... that's when you get into trouble.

But what I started was something I did not foresee later. The climax was an unexpected journey and the ending was inevitable.

That moment was how it all started. I didn't know where it'll lead so I just ride along, a path to an unknown destination.

But what I do know was, that's where everything…

…Started going wrong.

To be continued.

* * *

 **Next Bonus chapter 2: Hebiko Hikigaya finally sees how corrupted the world is.**

 **Thank you for reading, and sorry for the late update. I had an unplanned schedule this week.**

 **And also, this is specifically to the guest name QS, you guys may not see his recent comment of my previous chapter because non-member review is set to be moderated on my account.**

 **QS, if you're not interested, then please stop reading it and find a suitable fanfic to your taste. You keep contradicting your own words. You say it's bored yet your still reading and leaving reviews, what a hypocrite. So please don't bother leaving one. You should know I write not to please you; I'm simply unleashing my imagination.**

 **Sorry about that people, need to let off some steam.**

 **Please leave a review and thanks for reading :D**


	11. Bonus chapter part 2

**SORRY:** **I was busy all week because of my preparation of the Tsukimi festival and it seems I'll be slower since I'm currently visiting my grandparents in another part of town.**

 **I post this to prove I'm not dead lol, I'll be updating slowly but surely. Also it's not just because of that, because some people said that my story is too long for one chapter, it's true though. Normally one chapter of Oregairu LN consists of not more than 8k if I'm not mistaken.**

 **Consider my schedule, I can't guarantee when I'll update but the next part for sure will be the last part of the bonus chapter! You can count on it because I'm dying to continue on to the main story since this bonus chapter because I feel like finishing this bonus chapter is a priority, and also because it's a bit dark maybe because the bonus chapter consist of adult character instead of teen, so yeah, adult life means more drama than teen and you know what they say, the more you grow, the more your eyes became clearer.**

 **So this is the continuation part of the bonus chapter. Hope you'll enjoy it.**

 **I just noticed people are talking about my fanfic on Spyro's website; I'm very well flattered and appreciate to whoever brought up my fanfic and spread it among people in Kyakka. #PrayforSpyro**

 **Thanks to the readers.**

 **Take your time reading it.**

 **Sorry in advance for any error in the story. I was a bit rushed with this chapter so expect any error.**

 **Do leave a review, thanks :D**

 **Oh BTW:** **As a bonus for this bonus chapter, if you click onto my profile you will see my visual interpretation of Hachimom/ Hebiko Hikigaya as my display picture from what I can gather from the LN of what Hachiman stated about her appearance so far and a bit of my imagination of course.**

* * *

 **Bonus Chapter 2: Hebiko Hikigaya finally finds her closure between him and herself.**

* * *

I thought my life as an investigative journalist would be a simple job,

I thought it would just be about gathering information of an individual wrong doings, and write an article about it.

Exposing the corruption from its shadows,

Bringing the injustice to justice,

Showing everyone the true face of evil,

But I was wrong,

It was more than I expected.

More than simple.

All I could think of was completing my task, ignoring everything and move on.

I never thought about the consequence, about the aftermath.

Just until recently.

While doing my work along the way, I never realized it would affect not only the corrupter's image but also the people that was related to them,

Close to them,

Especially family.

Even though they weren't involve, still after exposing one of their family member's corrupted doing to the public through articles,

Society started looking at them differently,

Treated them like the black sheep of society.

In some ways, I feel like it was my fault for making the people treated them that way,

It feels wrong in so many ways,

I felt distraught and devastated after seeing first-hand, what my job had done to their image recently,

He used to tell me 'Never let your emotions get involved in your line of work.'

I understood what he was referring to, but is it wrong?

Is it wrong to have emotional preferences?

We are human after all, we were built that way.

Just as flies are built to buzz,

Trees are built to make leaves,

Humans are built to get happy or sad about things.

Ever since then, ever since I developed a complex from it,

I lost all my sense of direction,

I couldn't tell which was up and down,

Which way was Left or right,

But most of all,

I lost my way of knowing which was,

Right and wrong.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

"My name is Fuyuki…Yukinoshita." He stated his name to me.

All the sudden, something struck my mind as his last name was very oddly familiar and so as his appearance now that I think about it, I've seen him somewhere before. I placed my hand on my chin along with the closing between my eyebrows, making a thinking posture as I started jogging in my memory of his name. I muttered his last name "Yukinoshita" repeatedly so I would grasp a suitable match of any fitted clues of his name in my memory.

Then, I lifted my head up from thinking and gazed at him directly.

"By any chance, are you one of the diet members representing this prefecture?" I asked.

He made a look of surprise at my direction then chuckled.

"Ah technically, my father is currently representing Chiba prefecture, but I'll be replacing him once he step down his position in the future. So for now, I'm merely just his apprentice." he said then made a small laugh. _How is that a laughing matter? But still I can't believe it's really him in front of my eyes._

Well, I have seen him as a two dimensional being along with his father from the newspaper and television but still for him to appear in front of my eyes as a three dimensional being was somewhat unbelievable, it's like meeting your favorite celebrity that it's too good to be true.

I continued staring at him making sure I wasn't hallucinating, and so I closed my eyes and opened it repeatedly to see if I wasn't dreaming and it seems like I wasn't. But just to make sure I wasn't, I lifted my hand, forwarding to his direction and started poking on his shoulder.

"Umm, what are you doing?" he asked with a perplexed look on his facial expression.

After I made several numbers of pokes on his shoulder with my index finger and he wasn't vanishing, I can now conclude that he was definitely the real thing.

"You're definitely real." I muttered.

"Pardon?"

"O-Oh it's nothing!" I startled and nervously waved both my hands in front of me while stammering my voice as I spoke to him.

He wearily smiled as a response to my reaction.

But even so, to be taking his father position as a diet member to represent our district… he seemed a bit young for such a big position or maybe he's just older at age but young in appearance I guessed. Looks can deceive age after all. Especially his characteristics; he talks maturely, wearing a suit and very well-behave so I guess he's really older than he looks.

"So…Yukinoshita-san… what brings you here?" I asked while proceeding to my desk and took my seat.

"Well, as I said before. I'm looking for Tajima Kanto."

 _Ohh right, the senpai. I forgot…_

I rested my chin on my hand while looking at the direction of Kanto-senpai's desk. I started wondering if he's working half day today, he never informs me anything to be honest.

I let out a sigh, and then I pulled my phone out from my purse to call him and inform him there's a guest waiting for him at his desk. Consider what happened, it might still be a little awkward between me and Kanto- senpai, probably too soon to talk to him but it's not like I can't keep a guest waiting for him, especially if it's a Yukinoshita, so I'll just have to make do and call Kanto-senpai.

As I waited for a while with my phone on my ear, it seemed he's not picking up but then the phone was answered.

"Hello, senpai-"

But before I could inform Kanto-senpai anything, he quickly closed his phone and ended our call before it even started.

"What the…" I muttered.

 _Is he sulking right now!?_

Clearly he answered the phone and heard me. So I gave up and didn't bother trying to call him again _. I guess even senpai can feel those kind of emotions too huh?_

"So?" Yukinoshita-san's sudden spoke up startled me. I turned my chair around and scratched my head followed by a forced short laugh.

"It seems he won't be here any time soon." I briefly answered him since I can't get fully what was wrong with senpai at this moment or his reason for closing my call all the sudden after he picked it up, it's either he was working half day or he's just sulking after what I blurted out to him during our argument in the café.

So that was the only answer I can respond Yukinoshita-san with.

"O-Oh. I see." Yukinoshita-san immediately made a frown on his facial expression and cast his eyes down to the floor. I was bewildered by his expression, and wondered why he was making such face.

I know that he was looking for Kanto-senpai and it's not my business to be concern about but still, I felt so anxious and couldn't ignore what was going on.

 _Well, since I am working under Kanto-senpai, I guess his business is my business as well so I guess I could…_

"Is there any way I could help you with?" I asked and made a smile in an attempt to comfort his situation and smooth his atmosphere, trying to be more or less like Tomoya-senpai in this situation.

"Well…" he looked hesitant and anxious to tell me his situation.

I began thinking and search for the right words I needed to say in order to trigger him to have a bit of sense of faith in me and so I made a warm smile at his direction as I said the words he needed.

"It's okay, just tell me. You can trust me. I may be able to pass your message safely to Kanto-senpai. So please, feel free and don't let it trouble you."

He looked at me in surprise and returned a smile at me. He looked somewhat relieved by my words which in turn made me glad that I responded him with the right words. I may not be as talented as Kanto-senpai when it comes to extracting truth and exposing people.

But even so, I have my own talent of looking for the right words to make people's sour situation comfortable and relaxing, warming them up from their bitter state and in return they trusted me and began opening themselves to me regardless of who I was to them even though I was a mere stranger to their eyes. I never once took advantage of their trust even though senpai once told me to but I always meant with my words and never betray it. I guessed I was a natural when it comes to these things despite not being very socializing but if there's a time when I need to, then I would, like I did now with Yukinoshita-san.

Or maybe Tomoya-senpai's personality began rubbing off on me. I guessed she kind of grew on me and started grasping on how she does thing, smoothing such situation with mere words, make such mood relaxing in the atmosphere; I should thank her later I supposed.

"Very well…"

I crossed my arms and focused my gaze on him.

"Kanto-san, I believe he's in the middle of an investigation… on my family."

Ah, so that's what he was working on ever since yesterday and this morning. Too bad he was too busy being paranoid not to let me in on his case.

"Recently he's been asking the people I associate with regarding the Yukinoshita, my family." He continued.

"And what exactly was he asking?" I asked.

"I apologize, but I can't really tell you the details. It's a pressing matter on my family." He lightly bit his lips and dropped his gaze.

"Ah that's fine. I can understand that." I forced a smile to make it very convincing that I was fine either way.

"But…"

"Hmm?"

Yukinoshita-san expression turned serious then he shot his gaze strongly at my eyes.

"Whatever information he discovered on my family, if it gets out to the public then it would ruin my whole family… especially my wife and daughter. It would likely spoil her future."

The scene of what happened in the café suddenly made its way back to my mind, the moment when those two men harassed the waitress because of her father's corrupted truth now being made to public, what it did to the waitress's image. It ruined her, I ruined her. Because of me, the waitress suffered by how the society will look at her from now as a daughter with a corrupted father. Because of me, society will avoid her and left her to be alone. Because of me, I spoiled her future and her future will be unlikely…

 _Because of me…_

Both my mind and body was filled with anxiety as the incident what happened earlier was slowly developing to my new found trauma. My body was shaking, my legs were trembling, I tried to hold myself with my arms to suppress it yet my shoulders quivered when I did.

The incident in the café kept replaying itself repeatedly in my mind followed by what Kanto-senpai said during our argument echoing throughout my head.

"Hebiko-san?"

Yukinoshita-san's called out on my name startled me as I slowly came back to my senses. The anguish I felt that reacted to my body and its chemistry instantly disappears from me and I was back to my normal self again.

"Are you okay?" he looked at me worriedly; he must've noticed my conditions just now.

"I'm fine, this place is just chilly." I forcefully smile.

"Ah okay then." He replied.

I lied to him just so he wouldn't blame himself for my conditions because of the circumstance.

Now that I was back to my senses, I realized something in what he said earlier that was delayed by my sudden anxiety just moments ago.

"Y-You have a daughter?" I asked as I look at him in surprised.

"Umm yes." He answered.

"Oh."

"Something wrong?" he asked with a confused look.

"Nothing." I wearily smiled at him.

Truthfully, I suddenly brought up the subject about her daughter with a purpose to change the subject away from me. But I still find it hard to believe that he even have a daughter, I guessed that further proves that he was in fact older than he looks. Still, what he said was true.

If whatever Kanto-senpai discovered, whatever personal or private information he grasped, knowing him, he wouldn't give a second thought or even hesitate to publish it in the papers. And I already knew what will be the outcome once it would be made to public; since I've already seen it first hand back in the café. I wondered how many did our line of work ruin the lives of the people involved especially their family.

I clenched my hands tightly and gazed at Yukinoshita-san with a resolve to his issue.

"I'll try…no…" I muttered then paused as I responded with the wrong words.

"…I'll stop Kanto-senpai. I will." I said vigorously towards Yukinoshita-senpai my resolve to stop Kanto-senpai.

He looked at me in surprised then smiled warmly at me and slightly bowed his head to me.

"Thank you."

I meant what I said. This time, I won't sit around, this time it's different, it wasn't just anyone I was helping, and it wasn't someone who would act for their selfish needs. This time, it's someone with a good intention of saving his family from being misunderstood and hurt by the society. I can understand where he was coming from, if it were my family, my son…I would do the same.

Honestly, to be frank, I knew convincing Kanto-senpai to stop would be nearly impossible and I have no confidence to even convince or persuade him but even so, I should at least try despite the outcome.

 _This time, I have to stand up to Kanto-senpai. Nobody will get hurt._

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

It was the next day in the late afternoon. The workplace was illuminated by the sunset coming from outside of the building passing through the windows. As time passed by more and more people took their leave from work to return home. The environment was getting quieter and peaceful by the minute. Some people were planning to stay overnight since I saw one of them preparing their futon next to their desk.

I met up with Yukinoshita-san and had lunch with him during the day. Turns out, he was much of nice man than I expected him to be. I thought he was the same as every riches, greedy, prideful and selfish, fortunately I was wrong. After encountering and exposing people like those with Kanto-senpai for so long, I would always assume and expected the worse in them but Yukinoshita-san was different. He's very open about himself, and seemed to be trustworthy, so I decided to open myself up a bit to him, discussing my issues to him regarding my work, and surprisingly even though he doesn't seemed to understand my circumstances but at least he tried to be very understanding of me such as he would imagine himself being in my shoes.

When lunch period was almost over, after conversing about job related issues with him, we said our goodbyes to each other. Even if we didn't discussed anything personal, just by conversing with him, opening up a bit with each other was satisfyingly genuine.

Compare to my conversation, scratched that, arguments with Kanto-senpai. Senpai never opened himself up to me, never even at least tells me about his personal life even though I always tell him about mine but he always hear me out and gave me advises to my personal issue, that shows that he really cared about me which I was very glad that he did. Consider how unopen he was, we seemed to be close or that's what I think at least.

I never bother asked him what am I to him exactly, I always assumed he would answer 'mere co-workers' yet I never wanted to believe that, I never want to believe our relationship was just co-workers, despite every argument we had, every fight we had and every issue I had and advises he gave, I wanted to believe our relationship was somewhat more…yet clearly he's avoiding it, being ignorant of the fact that our relationship was something…

"Oi, Hikigaya quit spacing out and do your work!" Kanto-senpai startled my thoughts.

"R-Right!" I replied him while still startled.

And so I ended up working on the article that Kanto-senpai told me to yesterday at the café. There wasn't any choice, since I had no story at all to work on, plus I considered this as returning the favor to Kanto-senpai for what he did back then when I was being scolded by the chief. Despite the story being a mere speculation, it was the least I could do to repay my debt to him and showed my appreciation towards his helping hand to me back then.

Our desks was next to the wall of transparent glass which was the window of the building, so we could see part of the city from our seats but it was somewhat troublesome for me as sometimes the ray of light from the sun kept reflecting its light to my glasses. Since there are not much people in the workplace, I decided to take off my glasses for safety from the reflecting light of the sun shooting through my specs.

I watched as the sun became dimmer, the sky was beginning to darken as the orange illuminated sky turned to twilight yet the rays of light from the sun became even more sharper the more it goes down, and my eyes twitched from time to time as the light kept making its way back to my eyes and I tried rubbing it off for comfort.

I glanced at Kanto-senpai again with my eyes bare naked, I stared at him as he was doing his work. Suddenly he turned his head towards my direction and our eyes accidentally met with each other. We quickly averted our gaze from another with slight blushes on our faces.

Things were still awkward between us; we haven't said anything or even apologize for what happened. It's as if one of us were waiting for someone to take the blame and apologize. Obviously he should be the one to apologize first, he's a man, and everyone knows that as a male, they should always take a step forward first in everything. That's my opinion I supposed but, my husband never did treated me like that either. Sometimes he always cowers behind me, it felt like our position was switched when he does it, like I'm supposed to be the husband and he's the wife.

I sighed at the thought of my husband. _Can't he be manlier?_

I sighed once more.

"See you later Hebiko-chan! Keep up the good work!" Senpai energetically said her goodbye while passing by my desk.

"Thank you for your hard work. Safe travels Yu-" then I was quickly paused by the pouting on her lips along with the puffing of her cheeks on her facial expression.

"Hmm…" She growled softly and narrowed her eyes with that still expression on her face as if she's trying to remind me of something. _Ah right…_

"Safe travels, Tomoya-senpai." I corrected my sentence and returned a goodbye to her with a small wave of my left hand followed by a smile to her.

Her expression quickly reverts back to its cheerful smile as she returned an energetic wave of her hand at me. The thing about Tomoya-senpai was that she doesn't like people addressed her by her last name. She said that it would make her feel old, but I was confused to what made her give that conclusion. She wasn't really that old, she's about two years older than me. I really never quite understood Tomoya-senpai, sometimes she's smart, good at giving advises, good at reading the mood of the atmosphere but at most times she can be a real air head followed by her dramatic attitude.

"Bye Kanto-kun." Tomoya senpai said her goodbye to Kanto-senpai as well.

"Mmm." he replied a short reply with only that as he was busy focusing on the document on his hand while biting the end tip of his pen.

Tomoya-senpai immediately left the workplace and the building eventually. I just remembered, it won't be long until Tomoya-senpai will be retiring from work. Her reason was she's grown tired of working and she has a daughter to attend to, I guess splitting time between work and family was tiring I supposed, fortunately for me, I have my mom to take care of my child while I'm at work, whereas Tomoya-senpai...now that I think about it I never asked her who took care of her daughter while she's away at work, hopefully there's someone, I supposed there was someone since she never look worried at work.

Even so, she made the right call of quitting her work life to settle in as a mere housewife to spend some quality time with her family. Supposedly, one of the parent should stay home to spend their time getting to know and getting close with their child and teach them a thing or two along the way while the other act as our labor, our ATM for a better living standard for the family.

I always thought about doing the same thing as Tomoya-senpai, quitting work life and planning on becoming a mere housewife. Simple yet a lovely life spending time with your love ones.

Such as saying 'welcome home' to my husband every time he returns home from work. Having the time to tell my son a goodnight story while singing a lullaby to him. Cooking breakfast every morning for my family, doing chores and such.

 _Maybe I should too… when I earn enough money…_

But right now, I was focusing to earn enough money for my family, to moved out of my parent's house and buy our own house to settle a new life together as the Hikigaya family.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

The workplace was now left with me, Kanto-senpai and roughly about three people who were planning on working overnight, even the chief was still here, I glanced at his office from my desk and he seems to be in the middle of a phone call while making numerous hand gestures on his desk. _Business as usual huh…_

I switched my gaze to Kanto-senpai, feeling a bit worried since I already knew he was working on an article regarding the Yukinoshita family. I was getting more anxious by the second as my stares were fixated between him and his documents.

It was my chance to speak up to him, convince him to stop what he's doing. As I opened my mouth and tried to speak up, I feel like something was choking my words and I was unable to make out words from my voice due to the anxiety. I gulped down the saliva forming in my mouth; I could feel my forehead sweating a bit. Mysteriously all the sudden, the temperature of the room felt like it was gradually rising. The atmosphere became more and more intense and pressurizing. Regardless of the condition, I have to muster up my courage and speak up to senpai.

"What?"

"Gah!"

I was quickly startled and slightly jumped from my seat by his sudden spoke up. He must've taken noticed of my stare. He laid down his document on his desk, while covering his mouth with his hand suppressing himself from bursting into laughter due to my unsettling reaction.

 _Idiot, I almost swore to you out loud with unspeakable words._

I glared at him to which he startled and quickly looked away from me.

 _Weird, I never knew I could do that to Kanto-senpai?_

I rubbed my eyes and instantly figured out how I manage to make Kanto-senpai squirmed. Still were my eyes that intimidating? I felt victorious yet at the same time pathetic.

Kanto-senpai cleared his throat, and returned his gazed at me with a warm smile.

I looked away by reflex when he set his sight on me, I made a brief gulp and slowly turned my head and gaze towards him.

I should take this time to ask him regarding that issue.

"S-Senpai… are you by any chance…" I said anxiously and hesitantly but kept mustering up my courage to continue on with my sentence.

"…Investigating the Yukinoshita?" I finally asked what I want to.

His smile slowly vanished and he didn't looked surprise. He paused for a moment while staring at me but then he turned his seat back to his desk and continued reading his document.

He didn't answer my question, I gripped my skirt, clenching onto it.

"Senpai. Don't ignore me…" my voice was trembling.

"So he came by, did he?" he asked.

I was surprised by his question as I lifted up my head and gazed at him with a blank look.

He looked at me only with his eyes while his face was still towards his desk.

"Fuyuki Yukinoshita." Kanto-senpai said calmly.

"Umm…" I tried to answer him but he quickly interjects me.

"Of course he did. I did interview some of the Yukinoshita's associates. Obviously they wouldn't let me off that easily without informing the Yukinoshita."

Since he already knows that I was informed of his investigation of his next article then that means there's no point for him to hide any longer which means I can ask him any relevant questions regarding his article.

"What exactly pique your interest towards the Yukinoshita all the sudden?" I asked.

He turned his seat to my direction and now he was currently facing in front of me.

"His wife." He briefly answered me.

 _Yukinoshita-san's wife?_ If I remembered correctly her name, it's…

"Saruyuki?" I asked, I know her name as she was mentioned in my conversation with Yukinoshita-san during lunch time, but oddly though compare to her husband, I've never seen her or know what she looked like that's because she never made any brief appearance to any form of media.

"Yup…" he answered but his next words got me taken aback.

"…If that's even her real name, that is."

I flinched.

"W-What do you mean?" I asked, tilting my head to the left for the meaning of his statement.

He cleared his throat before he began debriefing his whole investigation of the Yukinoshita to me. It's unusual, he never debriefs me on any of his case when I asked him before but it did not matter, at least he's opening up to me this time.

"I begin my investigation on Fuyuki Yukinoshita, I did some digging on him, left no stone unturned and he's clean as a whistle so with that, I moved on to his wife. While I was investigating her, there was something off. One of his associate told me Fuyuki and Saruyuki first met and head over heels with each other during their high school so I went to their old high school and began asking some questions to the principle there regarding them…but…"

"There wasn't anyone he remembered name Saruyuki. He even checked the history record and the list of students that used to study there and the result remains the same. There was no Saruyuki."

"Huh?" I was surprised.

"However, the principle was kind enough to let me go through the students file records, with a warrant of course. I checked the female students file records one by one, examine their faces on their photos carefully and comparing them with the provided picture of Saruyuki Yukinoshita."

I nodded and continued on listening to Kanto-senpai. I was nervous and made several gulps while listening to his debriefs waiting for the truth. The truth always made me nerve wrecking for some reason followed by the pounding of my heart multiplied in both beat and speed.

"As I checked through their faces, then one of them surprisingly had similar facial features with Saruyuki Yukinoshita, but her name was different. Rather than Saruyuki, it was Haruno. Haruno Saruki."

 _Haruno?_

"Come on senpai, it's probably a coincidence they have the same face." I let out a forced laugh but was soon stopped by senpai's sharped voice.

"Hikigaya. In this department, there's no such thing as a coincidence." Kanto-senpai was glaring at me coldly.

"Her first and Haruno's last name have the same first syllables. Same school as Fuyuki Yukinoshita. Same facial features. Not to mention, I was told she was the one that was in a relationship with Fuyuki Yukinoshita back then. Now, tell me again if that's a coincidence, Hikigaya."

I was at a loss of words and quickly went silent with my gazed dropped down to the floor and lightly bit my lips as I continued to listen to him silently this time until he's finished.

 _I feel dumb for laughing it off. So stupid…_

"As I read through Haruno's school record, it turns out; she dropped out of school in the middle of her second year of high school. Her reason was never mentioned. I was getting very suspicious, so I decided to drop by the Saruki's household to meet this 'Haruno Saruki'. If she's even there, that is."

"When I went there, I was met with her parents only. My suspicion of her became true when I asked them about their daughter, Haruno. They were equally shocked when I asked for Haruno's whereabouts, but the way they look, their eyes…there was both anger and sadness."

"But what's shocking, was their answer to my question. Haruno…left them."

My eyes widened in surprise once I hear his statement.

"Wait, why did she?" I asked anxiously.

"Because…she was pregnant."

 _What…no way then that baby belongs to… How could Yukinoshita-san…_

"It's because of that, she was given a choice. She was forced to choose between abort the baby and stay or leave the house with the baby."

 _What? Just what kind of parents would do that to their own daughter? And they didn't hesitate? They didn't bother with the choice they gave to their own daughter?_

"She chose to leave with the baby of course."

I can't imagine how Haruno must've felt when her own parents gave her that kind of crucial choice. It must be devastating. Just by knowing that, just by knowing people like those existed, tells me there are a lot of things I don't know about this world, about the people living in it. Things I didn't know, but things that Kanto-senpai was already well aware of. Maybe Tomoya-senpai was right; maybe I haven't fully understood Kanto-senpai's reason behind his intention because I was too busy with my own.

"So I checked the birth record of the Saruyuki Yukinoshita's first child, the date she was born, and comparing it with the date Haruno dropped out of high school, I assume that's when she was pregnant. When I forwarded the date to nine months from her dropout, the date led to July…and Saruyuki Yukinoshita's child was born on the exact same month, July, which concludes and confirms that…"

"Haruno Saruki and Saruyuki Yukinoshita is the same person."

"But her name?" I asked.

Kanto-senpai let out a sigh as he answered my question.

"I assume she told her boyfriend Fuyuki, about her situation and condition. So, I assume that the Yukinoshita took her in and changed her identity… a clean slate, turning her into a new person, giving her a new life to live with her child, their child of course."

"That's so kind of Yukinoshita-san; he took responsibility for his action to Haruno and helped her." I mumbled softly and smiled to myself while gazing down to the floor.

 _But why go through all the trouble changing her? Can't she remain with her name? But still…_

At least Haruno made the right choice, rather than aborting the baby, she left just to let the baby live. It's hard to leave their parents behind but she was forced to for the sake of her child.

If so, then why did Yukinoshita-san said something about Kanto-senpai would ruin the Yukinoshita? With this information, wouldn't it ruin Haruno's parents instead? I wasn't at least bothered if it does ruin them, because they deserve it.

"Kind maybe, but it's nearly impossible to change her whole identity, it's completely illegal actually."

I placed my hand on my chin making a thinking posture as I delved in to my thoughts on how they managed to change Haruno's identity.

That's true, when it comes to identity change, one must have a very important valid reason for such change. Unfortunately pregnancy wasn't one of them. I already knew from Kanto-senpai that Saruyuki had her identity changed with the help of the Yukinoshita. From what I heard, the Yukinoshita are one of the most prestigious, influential and wealthy family in Chiba prefecture but that doesn't mean they have the authority to crossed such rules or even get such special treatment, Yukinoshita or not, everyone were obligated to obey the law. Nobody was different under the law. So how did…unless…

As I lifted my chin from my hand, Kanto-senpai made a smirk at my direction.

"I see you figured it out. The Yukinoshita aren't just wealthy, they also have strong ties with very influential people. From one high place to another and with that wealth, what do you think?" he asked me as if he knows I already have a grasp to the answer, unfortunately, he was right.

I was hesitate to answer, and didn't want to believe if it's true but even so, everything fits the description that the Yukinoshita did indeed,

"Bribery…"

Kanto-senpai let out a chuckled.

"Very perceptive as always. Too bad you're always into your feelings. Without it, you'd be one hell of a journalist." Kanto-senpai made a brief stretch of his arms and neck.

I didn't want to believe it, didn't want to believe someone like Fuyuki Yukinoshita… a man who looked so kind and gentle to be doing such hideous act. No, perhaps it's not him. Just because there's a bad apple in the barrel doesn't mean the rest are rotten, and just because their family helped Haruno Saruki changed to Saruyuki Yukinoshita through bribery doesn't mean Fuyuki was well involved, even if he did, he did it because he was taking responsibility, and he's a man who did it for his wife, for his family. And that's the kind of Fuyuki Yukinoshita I believed in, and he doesn't deserve to have his privacy to be made to public, that'll ruin his family.

"Could you…at least cast aside about the Yukinoshita, and just put in about the Saruki family instead?" I asked, pray within myself for my request to be granted.

Kanto-senpai let out a stressed sigh and rubbed his forehead with his hand. Clearly he was annoyed.

"Hikigaya, even if I do that, what's stopping them from wondering where the Saruki's daughter went. It'll just lead them to the Yukinoshita family anyway. One way or another, they'll find out that Saruyuki Yukinoshita was Haruno Saruki and they'll catch on to how she changed. " Kanto-senpai briefly explained to me, and it was a very logical and sensical explanation but still,

"Even so, there's still no proof or evidence that the Yukinoshita did bribe!" I retorted with a valid argument, indeed, without any solid proof or evidence, he really can't prove anything.

"Don't play dumb Hikigaya. Why do you think they went through all that trouble just to bury her identity deep below? Perhaps they didn't want anyone finding out, if so why? Obviously pregnancy isn't a valid reason for an identity changed, so how did they manage to get her identity changed? Not to mention, why did Fuyuki Yukinoshita came here yesterday? Clearly he wanted to convince or even beg me not to publish the truth about his family and him, but why?"

Kanto-senpai's argument wasn't arguable; it was a complete valid reason. I didn't know how to respond to his argument. What he said may indeed be true and reasonable enough to assume the Yukinoshita did bribe their way into changing Haruno Saruki's identity, still…

I gripped my hands tightly on my skirt as I responded him.

"It's because he loves his family, he doesn't want to see them getting hurt, isn't that obvious?"

"Is that what he told you? Is that what he filled your head with?" Kanto-senpai asked harshly.

Yukinoshita-san never said anything like that, he only said that it would ruin his family and he didn't want the information to be publish but wasn't that because he loves them? Wasn't the reason he doesn't want the story to be made to public because he doesn't want his family to be ruined, thus he doesn't want them to be ruined because clearly he loves them, what more reason was there aside from that? It's that obvious.

"No but obviously-"

"Then no, he never tell you his reason did he? So it's nothing but your belief in him. Am I right?"

True, it's nothing but my expectation, my belief in why Yukinoshita-san never wanted such sensitive information to be discovered but still…

"Belief or not, isn't it obvious that he's clearly protecting his family because he loves them?" I argued.

"Protecting is one thing, and loving them is another. But does he really protect out of love? Or something else."

"Why can't they just let her keep her real name? Why was it necessary to change her identity? There's an ulterior motive in all this." He continued.

"Remember Hikigaya, they're the Yukinoshita. They were raise not bring shame to their good and graceful name. Even if it means doing twisted act to cover up their flaws. In the end, all that matter to them was image and reputation. Never the people. "

"I don't believe that!" I retorted.

"It's the truth Hikigaya whether you like it or not."

"No, it's not!"

"Of course you would disagree, because it's inconvenient to you." Said Kanto-senpai calmly before continuing.

He sighed and looked at me with half-closed eyes.

"The truth is always inconvenient, ugly and painful. That's why most people prefer a lie because they only take 'facts' convenient to them, and assume that lie to be the 'truth' but in reality, it's still a lie that's convenient, easy for them swallow in the pill, so they won't get hurt by what's inconvenient thus the truth."

Kanto-senpai gazed down before slowly turning his gaze to the window next to him, looking at the scenery of the city below and mumbled softly,

"We live in a corrupted world. A world full of facades. A beautiful surface of lies, covering the ugly truth underneath it."

There was no use, no matter what I say, nothing could go through that thick head of his. The longer we argue, the more afraid I was to unwillingly admit that he's logically right. I refused believe Fuyuki Yukinoshita was that kind of man.

Kanto-senpai's wrong because he only assume the worse in everyone, no matter how much I convinced him. He's just too stubborn to see the other side of a person. It's just Kanto-senpai, not me. He's the one in the wrong about Yukinoshita-san, not me. It's just his way of thinking. I'm sure if anyone were in my shoes; they would think the same way I did right now. I'm sure they would assume the same that Yukinoshita-san was merely trying to protect their family because he loves them. Nothing else.

 _Kanto-senpai is just wrong; he's the only one wrong about his view of everything._

And with that, I stood up and quickly retrieve the document from his desk while he was looking away.

"There's no point in tearing that article to shred." He said as he noticed his document was currently in my grasp.

I flinched and waited what he'll blabber next before I could further do anything to the document I held.

"The article you're looking for has been long gone since this morning." Said Kanto-senpai bluntly to me.

His response quickly froze me in horror and caused me to weakly drop the document I held to the floor. I was slowly filled with anger that if I was a thermometer, the mercury in it would've break straight out of its bulb due to excessive force of my anger. My body began trembling, I gritted my teeth as I walked towards him and before I know it, I slapped the left side of his face with the right palm of my hand landed squarely and hardly on his left cheek. No one in the workplace noticed us nor saw my action, thankfully because of the height of the free-standing wall that surrounded our desks blinding the scene.

My breathing became deeper and my heart pounded even harder mainly because of my anger.

He rubbed off the pain from his face and looked at me with an expressionless face, an expression he wasn't supposed to make after being slapped, an inhumane expression. He didn't react at all to my action towards him. I continued glaring down while standing in front of him.

"This is why I've never tell you anything about any of my cases. Because I knew you would act this way." He said casually while still rubbing the left side of his face.

While breathing deeply, I asked.

"Why…"

"Just…why…" my breathing rate won't let me make a continuous sentence.

"Just…why…do you see everything that way? Why are you so heartless?" I asked, I felt like I could break down at any moment but tried not to.

"I told you; never let your emotions get involved in your line of work." Kanto-senpai replied.

"But we're still humans! How could you…" I wasn't able to continue the words I tried to speak out but Kanto-senpai answered me anyway.

"By being one with the job."

I made a puzzled look at him. _Being one with the job?_

"Hikigaya, this job requires cruelty, so remove all remorse you have when you're doing your job." He explained.

I was taken aback, and retorted immediately.

"Do you even realize what you're saying?"

"Do you?" He returned a question to me.

"Hikigaya, in this world, if we're too honest, we will be fooled. If we're too kind, we will be played. So it turns out, cruelty is needed in order to live while remorse is what gets you killed."

"So cast aside those unnecessary emotions. It's a luxury we can't afford to…" His mouth distorted, he was slightly trembling as the words he tried to speak out didn't manage to leave his lips but he continued on with a different sentence.

"Don't let any stone left unturned. Use any means, any tactics even if it means lying to get what we want. And what we want is the truth then show them, expose their true colors to the world. Prove to them that they're no different than people like us." His voice grew sharper as he blurted out those words. There was anger behind his voice.

 _Them? Us?_

Kanto-senpai clenched his hands tightly for some reason, his facial expression turned from calm to serious. The way he spoke these words, there's a deep meaning behind to it. Something I don't know. Something that Kanto-senpai only kept to himself.

"Senpai…" The anger that filled me moments ago was replaced with sympathy towards Kanto-senpai.

"Just why are you so ill driven to it anyway?" I asked, the question that he never answered me every time I asked him. I wanted to understand him, so I could have reason to proceed to cruelty as he told me to, so I could have second thoughts about what he said so far. Also to reconsider his cruel acts, to consider if it's for the greater good.

My question flinched him on his seat and caused his mouth to contort slightly. There was only silence that answered my question.

And so I asked him another question.

"Just what are you trying to prove anyway?" I asked softly, attempted to relax the atmosphere between us so he could properly answer me.

 _Please…answer me…_

"Senpai, how can I understand anything if you don't open up to me?" I pleaded softly at his direction.

"Open…up…to you?" Kanto-senpai muttered.

"Is there a reason why I needed to that?"

His question surprised me and I gazed at him with a look of shock as he continued.

"Why should I open up to you?"

"Isn't it obvious? I wanted to understand you because you're…"

"I'm what?"

"…you're…" I didn't know what to answer. I never grasp what kind of relationship we hold. Obviously the current relationship we have was mere co-workers, but I believe we're more than that position.

"Friend?" he answered me.

I lightly bit my lips and made a nod at his direction. _Yes. I believe we are friends._

All the sudden he burst into laughter. Clearly this wasn't a laughing matter, I was being serious. I was slightly hurt because he took this matter lightly.

"Is that how you see it?" he made a small laugh after.

"There's nothing going on between us Hikigaya. As usual you let your feelings played you."

His statement caused me to aggravate.

"Aren't you being ignorant!? After everything you did for me, what was that for? Isn't that a sense of care? Isn't that what friends do?" I angrily retorted.

"Nope. You're just being delusional, at everything." He replied so casually. _Is this a joke? I'm being serious, why is he taking this so lightly._

I clenched my hands tightly, I felt like I wanted to slap his face again but I can't afford to be so ill composed once more.

"So what do you see me as?" my mouth was distorted as I waited for an answer that would end this complex.

Kanto-senpai paused for a brief moment and gave his immediate answer to me.

"You're just some stranger working for me."

I froze in distraught.

Kanto-senpai stood up from his seat and picked up the document that I dropped earlier from the floor. He packed his things, seeming taking his leave from the workplace.

"Oh Hikigaya. A word of advice…"

I didn't turn to look at him; my gazed was stuck on the floor. Both my expression and body froze like stone. All I could rely on was my sense of hearing as I listened to what advice he's about to hand out.

"Don't let yourself open so easily. Otherwise it will be easy for people tear you apart from the inside."

I didn't make any respond to his statement.

"I'll be taking my leave first. Thanks for the hard work. Hikigaya."

With those last words of his, he immediately left me and the workplace.

His answers was unexpected, I didn't know it would damage me this much. But still,

It's a closure I was looking for all this time between me and him. Finally I can look at him the other way around, as someone… nothing more than just my supervisor.

Weirdly, in some ways his answer was satisfying.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

It was already the following morning, after what happened last noon yesterday. I took my leave few minute after Kanto-senpai left me; I packed my things and left the workplace quickly. When I arrived home, all I did was snuggling up beside Hachiman. I didn't want to think of anything besides my one year old child. Every time I was broken, destroyed, I always went over to my son. Just by looking at his cute warm face and touched his tiny fingers was enough to relieve me from any kinds of anguish I have in both mind and soul.

It was already around ten in the morning, I decided to take a short break from the desktop, I stood up from my seat and made a brief stretched of my arms. I proceeded to head towards the mini kitchen in the workplace to fill my bottle with a refreshing mineral water. As I walked passing by every desk, as I approached near the office, I could see the chief and Kanto-senpai were discussing something privately in the office. It looked serious but it's none of my concern. Kanto-senpai was now none of my concern anymore. We're just co-workers, nothing more just as he said.

Once I arrived to the mini kitchen, I saw Tomoya-senpai standing, waving her hand in front of the two faces of two men who were currently spacing out while smiling, oddly they were giving out a springing atmosphere in the mini kitchen.

"What's wrong with those guys?" I asked as I approached Tomoya-senpai.

 _Why are those two smiling like idiots?_

"Hmm, who knows… they've been like this since this morning." Said Tomoya-senpai as she sip her mug of coffee.

"Ahhh… since last noon to be frank." One of the two men made a response.

 _T-They're alive!?_

"We saw…in the workplace." These two seemed to have a trouble time grasping proper words to answer us. I guessed they're still daydreaming.

 _But what's with that smell!?_

These two looked awfully familiar though, if I recall correctly, they're the guys I saw yesterday who brought their futon with them. So I guessed they work overnight, the stench they're emitting in the atmosphere, I was bewildered to how Tomoya-senpai could bear with it.

"And what do you saw exactly?" Tomoya-senpai asked while giving the two gentlemen a disgusted look at their direction.

The two men responded us, as they continued their answer to another.

"An…Angel."

"In…a...kimono."

Their smile grew disgustedly wider as they answered us.

Me and Tomoya-senpai exchanged puzzling look with each other.

"An angel in a kimono?" I mumbled, furrowing my eyebrows.

"Who'd wear a kimono at this time of month?" Tomoya-senpai mumbled her question.

Our immediate thoughts and attentions were soon interrupted by the sudden increased in the sound of murmurings heard in the workplace. Suddenly two securities rushed in the workplace, the direction they were heading to was the chief's office.

Everyone in the workplace stood up from their seats to see what was happening while me and Tomoya-senpai peek from the mini-kitchen to witness a very shocking scene, because it was the last thing we all expected to see from someone who was praised highly and respected by many.

"Oi let me go!" a man with a familiar voice shouted out loudly in anger coming out from the chief's office.

"Hey isn't that…" Tomoya-senpai couldn't continue as she was shock after knowing fairly well who it was.

The two securities restrained both his arms and dragged him out of the office and immediately out of the workplace. He continued showing resistance to his restraint while being dragged by the two securities. Everyone looked completely shock as they witness the unexpected scene. I did nothing nor say anything to defend that man, as I continued watching him in shock and muttered…

"Kanto…senpai?"

* * *

To be continued.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading!**

 **Feel free to leave a review :D**

 **Sorry for any error in my writing.**

 **And as usual, any confusion will always be answered in the next part.**

 **I will post the continuation once I'm done, I don't know when but the next one will be the last one. Thank you for understanding!**


	12. Voices of silence

**Sooo here's the update. Sorry for the loooong update. I was busy with work, and my work doesn't involve staying in one place so yeah. Just got back like before Christmas eve, happy holidays btw.**

 **I got to warn you firsthand, I may be rusty so as my English so I do hope you guys enjoy my first update after how many months?**

 **Enjoy, happy reading.**

* * *

 **Chapter 8: Voices of the silence.**

* * *

Even though that the matter at hand had already come to past, but, there's still something troubling me. Just because something had already been stopped doesn't mean it's finished. It left me with whole new questions, piling up in my head, swirling around and rolled itself into a ball of uncertainty towards one and only one person.

Yukino Yukinoshita.

Here I was, currently rinsing my face in this awfully odd looking restroom. My reason for my comment because this room seems far too big for a restroom. It's as big as the living room in my house, well even probably bigger. My eyes were swimming and swinging all over when I stepped inside this room but then I quickly lose interest or just being modest.

I turned off the running water tap, and wiped my wet face dry with the toilet paper. My face looked much worse than it already was, it's because I _accidentally_ cried earlier on my mom's shoulder.

 _Oh who am I kidding?_

I felt so ashamed and embarrassed with myself for crying consider my age and gender. Ever since I've been in the service club, I've done things that were unexpected and wrong but at the same time it was instinct.

A natural human reaction and it proved to be very effective in resolving some 'personal' issue. We're all humans with complex emotions so…

 _Nothing's wrong with that right?_

I let out a deep sigh, nonchalantly threw the crumpled toilet paper in the rubbish and exited the restroom. Upon my exit, my mom was next to me leaning against the wall outside the restroom.

"Sorry I kept you waiting mom." I closed the door behind me and looked away from her out of instinct. Of course I would, because I was still embarrassed that I cried on her.

She only responded a smile at me. I quickly averted my gaze from her. My face grew redder by the second.

We proceeded walking to back to direction of the living room, where the rest was still there.

"So uhh…how do you even know where the restroom was?"

It was my mom who showed me the direction where the restroom was, which was very suspicious indeed to how she knew where it was in the first place. I asked because I had to; consider the size of this place,

Anyone would easily get lost coming here first time…

Unless,

"Lucky guess, I guess." My mom giggled.

Unless, she's been here once.

I've been wondering what my mom's connection with Yukinoshita's father. She had his number and also seemed to be well familiar and well quaint with each other, seeing how Yukinoshita's father called my mom by her first name.

My mom looked like she wasn't in any interest to tell me that unless I asked her directly and specifically.

She probably gave me that kind of response because perhaps she doesn't want me to know.

Even so, I have no right to pry into her private life. After what she did to help me, I owe her that much so I won't force her to spill the beans, just yet.

What's done was done.

"I hope you didn't have any trouble finding your way to the restroom again, ma'am."

I lifted my face up to the voice and footsteps slowly coming towards our direction. It was the guy that opened the door, the butler more like it. Since he added "ma'am" I guessed he was asking my mom, so I remained silent and just observe.

"Ah, come on. It's really not that hard once you already know where it is. And please, it's Hebiko."

 _So she's been here once, just as I suspected._

"It's customary to show some courtesy to the guest. _Ma'am._ "

"We've known each other to drop the formality already. Never easy with you is it?" My mom let out a sigh.

Once I already obtained the satisfaction to my curiosity, there was no point in lingering around with those two, minding their reminiscence of their past. It wasn't just that, but also there will be spoken words that my ear wasn't ready to hear.

"I'll be going ahead first." Without any delay, I started walking away from them while they took their time chatting, catching up I guessed.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

As I was on my way returning to the living room, my eyes met with a familiar woman standing in the middle of the hallway holding Sable the dog, but it was the wrong person holding it.

"What's with the dog?" I asked and stopped in front of her at a comfort distance.

"Ah Hikigaya-kun. You see, Yukino-chan is-"

"Oh right, dogs. Figures." I looked away briefly.

Haruno giggled while rubbing Sable's head.

"I'm surprised she told you, well you two are close after all." Haruno put on a teasing smile.

"It's not that she told me, it's just…well."

 _Yukinsohita never revealed to me any of her weaknesses directly but through action, accidentally of course._

"Anyway, since we're on the subject of animals and fear, what animal are you scared of Hikigaya-kun?"

 _What's with this woman and her random topics?_

"Why should I tell you?" I slightly gave her a glare.

"Why not?"

"Leverage."

Haruno immediately bursted out into laughter. Looking at Sable right now in her grasp while she was laughing kind of makes me feel sorry for the dog.

After a few short laughs, Haruno catch her breath and regained her composure.

"Fine, I'll tell you mine. Deal?" said Haruno with a wink.

I can't help but feeling intrigued to know Haruno's fear. It's not every day you get to know someone such as Haruno's weakness. It's like finding a gold mine in a cave. So of course, it would be a waste to reject this kind of opportunity.

"Fair enough." I accepted.

"I knew you couldn't resist." Haruno made a teasing smile.

"Okay, tell me."

"Wow, you really are interested. Fine. Snake."

 _Snake?_

"Why am I not surprised? Aren't we all?" I said, quickly lose interest with her.

"Well. I'm not everyone. I have my reasons, you can't be afraid of something without experience it in front of you. Especially when you're a child." Haruno openly explained.

"So…you've seen a snake when you're a kid? At the zoo I take it." I asked.

She looked down at Sable with a small smile and rubbed its head.

"In the bathroom." She answered with a wide smile. Is that something to be smiled upon? What's wrong with her?

"Wait, bathroom? You mean inside your house?" I asked slightly confused.

She quickly nodded.

"Just how in the world a snake got into your house?" I was overwhelmingly bewildered. With the amount of security and house servants in this house, there's no way anything or any animals could slipped by unnoticed.

"No idea, but weird thing is… it's a snake but at the same time it wasn't."

"What's with that answer?" Now she responds with an even more non sense answer.

"Hey, I was a kid okay? Sometimes you mistake things with your imagination. So it could be a snake, or not. But fact still remains, snake scares me."

"Whatever you say…" I lazily looked away from her with an annoying expression on my face.

Well, I supposed her answer makes a little sense now. I can't argue with that statement. A kid can mistake anything with their imagination, such as myself. I still remembered I mistake my mom's slipper for a mouse.

So maybe a snake was never in her house. It was simply just her imagination as a child I supposed. Although, it's good that even someone like Haruno Yukinoshita was afraid of something and has her weakness.

"Now that you know mine, what's yours?" Haruno's smile and stare was fixed on me waiting for the words leaving my lips.

"Not a chance."

"Hey, no fair!"

"What, you'll find out eventually without me answering you right now. That's just who you are."

"I supposed you're right…" Haruno giggled, and then her lips curled into a smile completing a somewhat sadistic look on her face.

She suddenly poke my right arm with her index finger, and slowly slide it down.

"…I could never get bored of you. Hi-ki-ga-ya-kun." Haruno whispered closely to my ear.

There was chill shivering down my spine, and I instinctively swallowed the nervousness tasted in my mouth. My face strangely felt a burning sensation all the sudden.

 _Why am I flustering?_

"So where's your mom?" Haruno asked and looked over to my shoulder with her head turning left and right in search of my mom. But I had this itchy suspicion about something.

"Haruno."

"Hmm?"

"Did you purposely drag my mom into this?" I asked and narrowed my eyes on hers.

Haruno gape her mouth then slowly formed into a smile.

"Oh. What makes you say that?"

"You are suspiciously so well informed with my mom and her job… you probably knew she has extended information regarding your family. Her job makes her the right person to solve such situation. Especially when her son was involved in that situation, she was willing to step in regardless, and you knew that didn't you?"

Haruno continued to smile and raise an eyebrow looking amused at my statement.

"You never needed me, you only needed my mom. I'm just leverage. An irresistible bait, especially to my mom. "

Haruno let out a small chuckle to my speculation.

"That's quite an accusation, Hikigaya-kun. Bravo."

 _Knew it._

"I'm impressed Hikigaya-kun. It seems you never did lose that side of yourself. I admit, some of it is true. I knew your mom, well knew her work back when I was in high school doing some ambition project then I came across her article in investigative journalist."

Sable continued swinging its tail while Haruno continued.

"I admire her work, very much that I idolize her. Most of her work was regarding corruption especially from people with high standards or...you know, us. So I figured she probably has done her homework on us Yukinoshita as well. Though I still don't know why she never wrote and publish her article about us. Strange…"

 _That is strange I supposed. Consider how my mom acted in front of Yukinoshita's mom, she was merciless. She exposed corruption and truth so why are the Yukinoshita an exception?_

Then something immediately came back to my mind on what happened inside the room before.

"Wait, if you know her? Then how does she know you?" I asked.

"Huh?" Hauno's smile vanished and was replaced with a surprisingly blank expression.

"She's an investigative journalist Hikigaya-kun. Of course she knows me."

 _That's a…good point. Back there when my mom first meet Haruno and greeted her, it's like she knew Haruno. Maybe it's just her job that gave away._

"But…"

I gazed at Haruno as she spoke up all the sudden.

"Now…that…you mention it. I've seen her somewhere before but I can't remember where." Her eyebrows furrowed and closed in together as she was focusing her best to recall where.

"Of course you've seen her. You did read her article right? So you probably seen a picture of her as well."

Haruno made a serious stoned expression.

"Still, I can't help but think that something about her is…familiar. It's odd."

"Maybe…you should stop thinking. Just forget it." As much as I wanted to know, just looking at her like this was really sickening.

"Worry, are you?" Haruno reverted back to her usual self in mere seconds with a smug on her face.

I averted my gaze from her. Haruno quietly chuckled. She's definitely enjoying this.

"Hachiman." I turned my head in reflex to the soothing voice echoing the hallway along with her gentle quiet steps walking slowly towards our position.

My mom waved her hand as she approached me but all the sudden, Sable started barking loudly and somehow broke free from Haruno's arms. Sable quickly and joyfully ran towards my mom with a swinging tail. Without delay, Sable surprisingly jumped itself to my mom causing her to almost lose balance and fell.

Luckily she didn't fell, but I can't say the same for her specs on the floor and Sable now on her grasp but my mom's expression, her eyes…glaring at the dog on her arms.

 _Scary…_

Haruno looked daze, probably thinking what just happened.

"Stupid dog…" my mom muttered coldly to it, and dropped Sable to the floor with no hesitation.

"Hey…mom. What was that for?" I picked up the whimpering dog on the floor and held it to my arms.

"You're taking its side!?" my mom burst to me with a distraught look but I quickly looked away. I can't really look at her in the eyes especially when it's 'bare'.

 _I haven't even make taking any side, though it's reasonable to be siding with the dog since you're abusing it for personal reason._

Haruno laughed shortly in amusement to me and my mom's squabble before kneeling down to picked up my mom's glasses on the floor. So far I can tell, it's not broken, otherwise me and Yuigahama's lives on the road would be at risk.

She's the driver.

"Sorry about that." Haruno apologized to my mom and laughed wearily.

Haruno stood up and attempted to return my mom's glasses to her, but before she could, her smile quickly replaced with a slightly gaped mouth, eyes widened and she was instantly froze on the spot.

Her moist eyes were fixed on my mom's. The two stare at each other in the eyes for more than a moment with a blank expression on Haruno's face while my mom simply put up a small warm smile as she looked at Haruno.

 _Wow, Haruno really is something. How could she even stare at my mom's bare eyes directly?_

My mom reached out to her hand and gently took her glasses from Haruno's fingers.

"Thank you." My mom warmly smiled at her and returned her glasses to her eyes.

Haruno came back and staggered for a moment before she made a hasty yet nervous response which was very rare.

"Umm… I-, you-you're welcome. I-it's my, my fault anyhow, so I'm sor-"

Before Haruno continued on, her nervously distorted running mouth was stopped by a pat on the head by the right warming palm of my mom's hand.

"It seems I kept my promise after all." My mom softly whispered to Haruno.

Haruno let out a slight gasped by instinct and looked very surprised.

My mom rubbed her head just as she usually did to me and put up the sweetest smile she could. Her smile was felt even at me, that it changed the atmosphere around her. What she lacks on the eyes, makes up for the smile on her lips.

Haruno seemed froze by it, and then broke out of her freezing state by another following sentence from my mom.

"Hope you had fun."

My mom slowly withdrew her hand from Haruno's head and walked away from us, to the direction of the front door entrance.

I glanced at Haruno and noticed there was a small tears coming out from the corner of Haruno's eyes.

"Umm…you okay?" I asked hesitantly.

She startled on my question and quickly rubbed her eyes followed by a quick reply.

"It's nothing, just dust, that's all."

 _Really, I'm sure this place looks spotless and dustless. There's no opened window if that matter._

As much as I wanted to return the favor, I'll let her be. Today Haruno's reaction, aside from being her malicious self, anger, sadness, and recently flustering made me realized…

She can also be like every other normal person.

"Anyway, I'm heading back inside. Yukino-chan could probably use a big sis support." Haruno winked at me, and started walking back to the living room but suddenly stopped as the Hayama family exited the living room.

Haruno slightly made a glare, not towards the family but to the person whom she thought would be by our side, we all thought he would but he wasn't as we expected. Hayato Hayama.

Hayama simply smiled at her, it was obvious he was forcing himself. Even in the end he still…unbelievable. As much as Haruno hated, she was forced to show some courtesy in front of his family and slightly bowed her head before continued her way to the living room.

I was left alone in the hallway with Sable around my arms. The Hayama family stared at me at the distance. I felt nervous and pressured all the sudden by their stares, then the head of the family made a brief nod at me before turning his back on me and walked away through the hallway.

But Hayama didn't.

He was walking to the opposite direction from his family, walking slowly towards me with a fixed smile on his face.

"Hey there." Said Hayama.

"Yo."

"Nice dog."

"It's not mine."

"I suspected as much." Hayama forced a laugh out of his wearily lips.

I despised small talks. Especially awkward atmosphere like this after what happened.

After he was done laughing, we both averted our gaze and just stare at the empty, spotless hallway.

"You know…" Hayama spoke up.

"Right about now, anything you throw shouldn't surprise me, but still, what you put up was inevitably surprising." Hayama chuckled at himself.

"You were surprising too. I never thought…"

Hayama then quickly interjected.

"No. You never expected… that I would agree with the proposal. That's all there is to me. I'm just nothing but expectations." Hayama glared at me biefly but then cast his gaze down to his feet.

"Did you agree to it because you were forced to? Or did you…"

"To be honest, I sincerely agreed to it." said Hayama.

"Even though Yukinoshita wasn't okay with it?" I narrowed my eyes on him, focusing onto his eyes, glaring, gritting my teeth slightly angered.

Hayama smiled and glanced at me.

"Yukinoshita already moved pass what happened between us back then. Still, I wanted us to be closer like we used to. So I saw this as a chance to be closer with her again…and eventually, we may…"

"Just stop." I interrupt him and disgusted at his state.

"With that kind of relationship, it won't work out."

"How would you know? Just by spending time with a single person, you would eventually grow attached to that person even if it's not by choice. Wouldn't you say? Especially if it's her."

At this very moment, what Hayama said just now, I began questioned myself whether or not…because that was Yukinoshita's issue from the very beginning, her conflict until now. Underneath that exterior hid a young woman who can't help but need a hand to hold without falling off from her feet.

If someone did reach out to her, she would eventually, definitely grow attached to that person even if it's not me or Yuigahama. The reason why she grew with us was because Yuigahama and I were the first two people to ever interact with her in spite of her personality, gain her trust.

So it's safe to say, she would treat the same with anyone given certain circumstances.

So, if it wasn't me that entered the service club and become the second member of the club, would she treat that person the same as she treated me?

"You're awfully quiet." Hayama startled me for a moment. I was busy occupying myself with my thoughts I forgot he was still next to me.

"Even so, that's an 'if'. The real question is what happens now? Since you did not only just wreck your relationship with Yukinoshita . Again. But also her sister."

Hayama lips curled into a frown.

"Now…it's up to me and just me alone."

He took a step forward to the direction of the exit and started walking away, just left me without any response. I guessed reminding him that wasn't such a good idea, though some part of me enjoyed seeing such a reaction from him.

 _It's a WIN-LOSE I supposed._

I continued rubbing Sable's head causing its tail to swing around rubbing on my abdomen. Suddenly, the bun hair clumsy girl we all love and annoyed emerged out from the living room.

"Ah Hikki!" Yuigahama noticed me and shouted in the hallway. Her shout echoed the hall which caught me off guard for a moment even though that was expected of her.

"Ah, Yuigahama. Here's your dog." Just when I was about to handed her dog to her. She stopped me with a gesture of her hand and began fiddling her two index fingers together.

"Umm…"

 _Oh no. I don't like where this is going. Every time she does that with her fingers, there's no doubt she's going to ask something of me and my gut tells me this has something to do with her dog._

"I'm planning to sleepover at Yukinon's apartment. After what happened, I thought she might need…me…plus I'll be going there with her driver. So I was wondering if you could…"

 _Knew it...but reasonable I supposed._

"Say no more, I'll take it back to my house and take care of it, okay." I finished her sentence for her…or that's what I thought.

"Actually, I wanted you to take Sable back to my house but since you suggested it…then it's fine by me!" Yuigahama cheerfully smiled her lips up at me, as for me I didn't know how to react except silently accepted 'my' suggestion.

"Mama was never good at taking care of Sable anyway." Yuigahama mumbled to herself as she returned to the living room.

 _Mom is so going to kill me for this._

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

A few minutes had passed; I was currently walking my way back to the mansion after I needed to tell my mom who was waiting in the car near the parking area by the gate about taking Sable back to our house, unexpectedly she accepted it but gave me a stink eyes in return as expected. On the other hand, Sable was no longer on my arms, which was relieving.

The Hayama's was nowhere around the vicinity, it's safe to assume they went home already since the white limousine parked next to my mom's car was no longer there, so it belonged to them.

As I entered the mansion once again, my eyes met up with both elder of the Yukinoshita family as they walked out of the living room now standing in the hallway, both eyes fixed to my presence.

Yukinoshita's mother had a guilt looked on her face while her father or the head of the Yukinoshita family had a calm yet concerned expression.

Yukinoshita's mother lightly bit her lips and lightly bowed her head to me, causing my eyes to react widely surprising upon her courtesy to the likes of me. I was supposed to show the same courtesy as well, but my surprise delay my reaction. After she did, she slowly walked away deeper into the hallway on the opposite direction from where I entered.

Yukinoshita's father gave me a small smile and nodded before walking away as well.

I stared at the room that was down the hallway, where Yuigahama, Haruno and…Yukinoshita probably still were. I calmed myself, and let out a deep breath. The entrance itself felt magnetizing as if those three were expecting my presence; I can feel it in the atmosphere beyond the room.

But I've already thought it through what I needed to say to Yukinoshita, which words were appropriate for the circumstances and what I've been meaning to say to her ever since, it happened…

Or, not at all.

I walked towards the entrance of the living room, with every step I took, as the room gets closer and closer, my heart races and beats louder. Finally, the sight of them was in front of my eyes, quietly sitting on the same sofa across the room.

I stopped in front of them from afar, and slowly lifted my eyes to gaze at them. Both Yuigahama and Yukinoshita were sitting and gazed at me as well with concerns look, Yukinoshita's eye slowly looked away from mine shortly after I look at her while Haruno remained silent with a calm expression and just observed me and Yukinoshita.

"Hikki…Yukinon…" Yuigahama alternate her stare between me and Yukinoshita slowly.

My eyes were still fixed on Yukinoshita but she wasn't. Her eyes looked elsewhere, and her lips were sealed tightly but trembling as if she tasted sour on her tongue.

The superficial lies.

The unexpected escalation.

And now,

The sour of guilt.

I slowly opened my mouth, to say what I need to say coming here.

Before leaving.

"I'll be taking my leave."

Yukinoshita's eyes quickly stared back at me with surprised, so as Yuigahama's but Haruno didn't react at all. With that, I slightly bowed my head and walked away from the to exit the room and the building. Before I left the living room, Yuigahama passionately called out to me,

"Hikki!"

I stopped, but didn't turn around to look at her. My gazed was on my feet; my hands were in my pockets of my trouser and waited…

"Aren't you…supposed to say something?" Yuigahama sounded hesitant as she asked that.

"We came here to straighten things out, now that's done…there's no point loitering." I replied her.

"Hikki…"

"What about you Yuigahama?"

"Huh?"

"You sure about this? I don't want you to blindly believe in what you're doing is right… so are you?" I asked her, because the reason she stayed with Yukinoshita means she forgives her after everything she did to me and hurt Yuigahama in the process.

I turned around and stared at Yuigahama, to make sure she's sure about her answer.

"Ye-

Yuigahama hesitate at first but,

"Yes, Hikki." Yuigahama put a small smile and blushed as she answered me.

There was certainness now in her eyes. She was having second thoughts at first but she was sure of herself now. She probably puts her friend first before what's right or wrong, as usual.

I chuckled quietly.

 _Still the same Yuigahama._

I nodded at her and continued my way to exit the house of Yukinoshita.

"We should go too." Haruno's voice was faint but clear.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

 _Finally. The whole atmosphere in there is intoxicating._

As I exited the building, the close door behind me opened once more. I turned my head in reflex, and the one that was opening it, surprisingly, was her.

Yukino Yukinoshita.

"Hi-kigaya-kun…" She whispered.

Yukinoshita had a concerned look on her face as she stared at me; she took a step forward outside, closing the door and leaned her back against it crossing her arms on her chest still in her Kimono. She stared at me but quickly dropped her gaze to the ground.

I turned my head away from her and just stood still while staring at the night sky.

"If you have something to say, say it." I said

She slightly gasped.

I admit it sounded harsh than I thought but I have every reason to be and she knows it as well.

"I…I've been meaning…to, apologize so I'm-"

"Do you expect me to forgive you just like that?" I quickly interjected her so called apologies.

Ordinarily at first, I would've forgive her but after resolving her situation, for a long time I have finally came back to sense and realization of what she's done to me, how she affected me…crushed me and made my life a living pit.

I didn't care whether right or wrong to forgive her even if she was forced against her will, still there was no point in hiding her intentions.

I'd rather face a horrible truth at face value than slowly breaking down by an uncertain lie.

All I wanted to know was,

"Why?"

"Why play a charade? Why did you lie?"

There was a moment of silence on the question I asked to Yukinoshita.

She stayed silent behind me, probably thinking on how to appropriately answer my question. I didn't bother looking at her and just stayed staring at the night sky.

There was only silence after a while since I've asked her.

 _So that's how you want to play it huh? Fine._

"No answer huh?" I said.

Before I started walking away, I was quickly stopped by a hand gripping onto my left sleeve. It was her hand, gripping tightly with no intention of letting it go.

"I just…don't want to hurt you." Yukinoshita's voice was trembling.

"Do I look like I was okay!?"

I turned my head around to look at her, when I did…her eyes were full of tears, sliding down her tinge red cheeks, along distorted lips.

"Hiki…Hachiman…"

I glared at her and gritted my teeth in anger.

"Tch."

I quickly pulled my arms away from her grip, and continued walking towards the gate, looking forward in leaving this place and away from her.

She was sobbing, but I didn't hesitate to whether or not it was wrong leaving her at that state and just continued walking forward.

By the time I reached the gate, I thought to myself whether I should turn around to look at her.

But no, I didn't.

There's no reason to turn back around. Only to react now.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

The road was quiet and dark with only the street lamps on the road and the headlight of the car lighting our path to home.

It had already been many minutes since we left the mansion and now on the road to return to the Hikigaya household, with my mom driving the car and Sable was sleeping soundly at the passenger's seat behind us.

I was sitting shotgun next to my mom. I glanced at her, and her eyes were plain cold.

"...Why?" She asked and startled me a bit.

"Huh?"

"Why do we have to bring that thing with us?"

I was confused to what she was referring to.

 _Thing?_

 _Oh…Sable._

"Yuiga…"

 _Hold on, think for a moment. Yuigahama never asked me, I was the one who suggested it. If I respond her with that kind of answer, my mom would kill me!_

I cleared my throat and answered my mom with the right answer to avoid such scenario.

"Yuigahama asked me to take it back with me since she was sleeping over with her friend." a simple and safe answer.

"Why didn't she just ask us to take the thing back to her house?" My mom returned me with another question.

 _Umm..._

Then I remembered something.

"Her mom isn't good at taking care of Sable." I answered.

My mom giggled with two fingers placed on her lips.

"True. That woman was never a pet person." My mom mumbled.

 _Huh? Whom did she mean?_

Suddenly, a cough burst out from my mouth. I quickly covered my mouth with my hand.

"Hachiman…you should've told me beforehand if you weren't feeling well. " My mom sounded worry.

"Your suspension is almost up, and your sickness is getting worse. It wouldn't have gotten worse if you could've told me early." My mom placed her left hand on her temple.

"Honestly, what am I going to do with you?"

 _For starters, both hands on the steering wheel. Please…_

"It's just a cough, mom. It'll go away. Eventually…" I replied and averted my gaze from her.

"Like father like son. Men are so stubborn." My mom let out a wearily sigh.

 _Ohh like I'm the only one who can be pick on._

"So mom…what's your relationship with the head of the Yukinoshita?" I asked nonchalantly, at the corner of my eyes, clearly I saw my mom's eyes widened when I asked her.

"W-Why are you asking me that all the sudden?"

 _Nervous? That's an unexpected reaction from her._

"Well…you two seem well quaint, and he did say you called him so that means you have his number…" I continued on, her lips curl slightly.

"You caught that huh?" My mom wearily smiled and forced a laugh while eyes still focusing on the road.

"What's weird, he called you by your first name…by any chance were you guys used to-"

I was quickly interrupted by a sudden painful sensation pulling my right earlobe.

"Ho-How, how dare you to think that way! Not a chance! Get it out of your head! Get it out!"

My mom was flustering while spewing out her _in denial_ words like a teenage girl rejecting a claim as she continued pulling my earlobe.

"Ow! Mom the road, the road!"

She pulled my earlobe with her left hand while her right was still on the steering wheel.

"How could you even think that!? Why do y-"

My mom suddenly froze, pausing the pulling of my ear and gasped before making such statement.

"Komachi's right…You're dirtier than I thought…" My mom quietly mumbled to herself.

"Wha? Komachi? what did sh-, ow!"

Her pinch on my earlobe was getting tighter, as she continued pulling my earlobe back and forth.

"How could my sweet boy turn out to be such a fantasizing perv!" My mom sobbed.

"Okay! Sorry, sorry my bad!"

* * *

 **Hope you guys enjoy it, after how many months again? lol nvm. I'll try updating as quick as I can.**


	13. There goes his peace and quiet p1

**So I think I understand that there's something wrong with the review section, the moment I came back…**

 **Coincidence? I think not!**

 **Lol just kidding but really, there's something wrong with it, some reviews aen't showing up.**

 **Just informing you guys, but don't let that stop you ;)**

 **So here's the next chapter!**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter 9: There goes his peace and quiet part ½.**

* * *

Today's the fifth and last day of my suspension.

It was decided…

That I spend my last day of suspension…

…In bed,

Wrapping myself under my blanket while sniffing my running nose.

The door of my bedroom instantly sprang opened.

My sight was met with a pair of glasses concealing its true terrifying gaze of the woman that entered my sanctuary.

"Morning Hachiman."

My mom greeted me in her usual work attire showing her slightly slim figure under the blue buttoned shirt with a knee length gray skirt, her short combed hair flicked left and right as she walks in the room.

"This place…is a bit dark." My mom walked towards the window, and pulled the curtains up.

 _Too bright!_

"Alright, time to take your temperature!"

I raise myself up from my bed into a sitting position.

My mom took a seat on my bed next to me and held out a glass thermometer, inserting it gently into my mouth. By the looked of thermometer between my eyes, the mercury wasn't as high as before. It seems I'm recovering.

She pulled out the thermometer and adjusted her specs before closely checking on the temperature.

"Let's see…38 degrees huh? Well, it's slightly going down so that's good I think."

 _You think? What do you mean you think?_

"Komachi dear, where's the towel I told you to bring up?" my mom shouted to the direction of the open door of my bedroom.

"Coming mom!" Komachi faintly shouted from a distance.

My mom turned to me as she noticed my stare, and smiled warmly at me.

 _So…cute._

She reached out her hand towards me, and began rubbing my head.

 _Oi oi, quit rubbing me like I'm a cat. Kamakura's around here somewhere you know._

I tried to resist her.

"Oi, qui-"

"Shhhh…"

But unfortunately, the sickness made me too lazy to resist.

As her palm was at the back of my head, all the sudden, she quickly brought my head closely towards her and hugging it.

I was squirming and twitching in such an awkward and uncomfortable position.

 _Too close, too close! Mom let me go, I can feel your-_

"Hachiman…"

"Yeah?"

"Please don't take this the wrong way."

"Uhh…sure…"

She laid her chin on top of my head while her hands still wrapped on the back of my head, embracing it, pulling my head closely to her…chest.

"These past few days, your suspension gave me an excuse to spend some time with you…"

"I never thought, I would enjoy spending time with my Hachiman…I can't imagine a whole day without you." She whispered softly on my head while gently rubbing and stroking my hair.

 _We rarely spend time with each other at all, the only time we spent a whole day together was yesterday…_

"Mom…why are you saying this?"

My mom's voice started trembling as if she was going to cry.

"Because once this day is o-o-over…I'll be returning to my usual working shift, and you'll be returning to school and we won't be seeing each other as much as…much as…" my mom broke down into sobbing, dug her head onto my head.

 _So you'd prefer the opposite of what you're saying? That's bad parenting!_

"Get off me for a second…" I let out an irritated sigh before gazing at my mom's state.

 _Woah, is she for real?_

It wasn't worse, I thought it was an act to get my sympathy like she always do but she's definitely crying.

I sighed again.

 _I can't believe I'm doing this…_

I reached out my right hand and placed it gently on my mom's left cheek. My mom squirmed a bit out of surprised and I proceeded in rubbing off the tears that was streaming down her cheek.

My mom stared at me looking surprised.

I averted my gaze from her. It's embarrassing enough that I had to resort such action, she didn't need to stare at me like that.

"Just because…hmm…things will go back to the way we used to…"

 _Endure…._

"…The point is we live under the same roof you know."

My mom slowly removed her glasses…and looked down on her knees with pouting lips.

"As if now would be any different…" she looked away from me still pouting and sulking.

 _Just endure…._

My whole body was beginning to squirm and my fingers on my left hand were twitching.

 _Endure…endure…_

"Okay, if…when you're free …I would cancel any plans I have…to…to…to be…with you…"

 _Right…as if I have any plans…but I needed to make it very convincing even if means signing a contract, so what the heck._

"You would?"

 _She took the bait!_

I rubbed my neck; still averting my gaze from her, embarrassment was what I'm feeling about now.

"Y-Yeah…" I answered and shortly, expelled out a deep breath after.

"…You're bound to me now…" my mom whispered something quietly to herself and coldly that it gave chills for some reason.

I turned my head to her.

"What?"

My mom shook her head and returned wearing her glasses

"I'm just happy to hear you say that." My mom clapped her hands and gave me a quick recovered smile.

 _That was quick!_

"Even though, you only said that to convince me just to stop me from crying. Right?" My mom gave a smile and wink at me.

"Uh, it's not like-"

"I know. I know, but the thought that you care is what counts." My mom smiled warmly which comforts the atmosphere of this room.

"Come here." My mom pulled my arm and embraced me once again.

"Mmm…" she rubbed her left cheek against my left cheek.

 _I guess I could let her have her moment._

My mom hugged me tightly. There was no gap between our bodies. I can't say I didn't like, it's comfortable especially down to her…

"Here you go mom, I brought th- , UWAH! WHAT'RE YA TWO DOIN!?"

Komachi in her school uniform quickly startled looking horrified and started shouting upon seeing the sight of me and my mom engaged in an embracement.

My mom released me as soon as she noticed Komachi in the room, shouting, loudly.

"Ah Komachi, you brought the towel. Thank you. Lie down now Hachiman." Said my mom nonchalantly, ignoring Komachi's concern.

I followed what my mom asked me to and lie down on my bed again.

My mom took the bowl with the wet towel from Komachi's hand.

"Hey! Don't ignore me!"

My mom continued ignoring Komachi's presence and her spat then proceeded in carefully lay down the wet towel on my forehead.

"Hey onii-chan, say something!" Komachi switched to me for some answer.

Just as I was about to answer Komachi about the 'situation', mom quickly interjected.

"Sorry Komachi. I'm afraid your brother is too sick to answer…whatever you were asking." Said my mom.

"Don't pretend like you didn't hear what I ask!"

"And what was that exactly?" my mom asked without looking a least bit interested.

"All, I ask was what were you tw-"

"Hachiman be sure to stay in bed and get enough rest, okay?"

My mom interrupted Komachi in the middle of her question.

"Hey listen to me when I'm talking!" Komachi shouted again.

 _So noisy, can't you see I'm sick!_

"I am listening Komachi…" my mom looked at Komachi with an irritated expression, while Komachi was gritting her teeth and narrowing her eyes.

"Fine…"

Komachi cleared he throat and took a deep breath, as she asked her question one more time…really fast.

"Whatwereyoutwo-"

"Be sure to lock the door when you leave to school Komachi." My mom walked out of my room nonchalantly once again successfully avoided Komachi's question.

"See there you go again!"

Komachi gave out sigh to the empty hallway then walked towards my bed and took her seat on the far end of the bed.

"You're not following mom?" I asked while still lying down.

"She has an early meeting and it's still early, I'll just walk to school." She replied.

"Ah, okay."

Silence filled in the room afterwards. Komachi was swinging her legs around on the bed.

"Hey onii-chan?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you planning on forgiving her? Yukino-san I mean." Komachi asked hesitantly, her gaze was on her swinging legs.

"What do you think?"

Komachi quickly turned her gaze to me with a concerned look.

"Onii-chan…you should talk to her first before making up your mind."

"I've already made up my mind. I'm done talking to her, done giving chances." I vigorously answered her.

"Tch. Why are we even having this discussion? Aren't you a bit too forgiving?" I quickly continued.

"Onii-chan, you were harsh to me and still forgive you as if it's instinct." She retorted.

"That's because I'm your brother."

"And Yukino-san is practically like a sister to me. Everyone makes mistake and lie then regret later on onii-chan, even you."

"Not the way she does…"

"Onii-chan." Komachi narrowed her eyes and pout her lips at me.

I was confused to why Komachi was even arguing on Yukinoshita's behalf. Fortunately for her, I was too sick to even get up and give Komachi a proper argument.

"Onii-chan, you're angry. You're not thinking straight."

"I am thinking straight that's why I'm angry." I retorted to Komachi.

"Onii-chan. why are you angry?" asked Komachi, her eyes were quickly focusing on me.

"It's because…you know..."

"Is it because you're disappointed? " Komachi gave answers for me to say yes or no.

"It's just she lied to me. She could've just told me the truth, and spare me the trouble." I said.

"Do you know her reason for doing it?"

I was embarrassed to say no, I lightly bit my lips and shook my head indicating I had no clue as to why Yukinoshita did what she did.

"So Onii-chan's angry not because you knew but because your feelings were hurt?" Komachi giggled.

"What's so funny?" I pointedly looked at Komachi with annoyance.

"It's just, normally you would say 'Emotions are useless unless you act with a reason' but you were emotionally angry for no reason." Komachi quickly burst into laughing.

"What's your point?" I was irritated because she kept on spewing pointless statement rather than just being straightforward.

"It's just; I would say onii-chan is improving on being more...normal." Komachi winked and stick her tongue out.

 _So cute!_

"Whatever you say…" I said, closing my eyes to get some rest.

"Onii-chan, I'm not done talking with you."

I let out a deep tiresome sigh.

 _Can a sick guy get some rest? What more does she have to say?_

"Give Yukino-san a chance to talk with you, hear her reason, and maybe there's a small chance you'd understand and then you can make a decision to maybeeeeee forgive her or not." Komachi continued.

"All I want is for you to talk things out with her first, settle things, and then the rest is up to you whether to end it or start over, it's up to you, okay onii-chan?"

"If it makes you leaving me to rest, then fine." I replied her.

So I decided to listen to Komahi and hear what Yukinoshita have to say about herself while the rest was up to me. It's a fair play I supposed, it would give me a good closure and reason for my decision to end things between me and her or start over which would be very unlikely. As if.

"Ah, really!?" Komachi widened both her smile and her sparkled eyes when she heard me.

"Yeah, yeah. Now leave me be."

Komachi giggled loudly and left my bedroom in a hurry.

"Bye-bye onii-chan!"

"Take care."

Komachi continued giggling and closed my bedroom door.

I can't tell if that's the giggle of my cute innocent little sister or the giggle of a mischievous little sister with a hidden malicious intention, somehow in some way I had a bad feeling what's coming…

 _Or it's probably just Ol'cynical pessimist Hachiman Hikigaya into it again…_

… _Still, when has that ever stopped me from being wrong?_

The sound of a closing door was heard coming from downstairs, indicating Komachi had left for school already.

I should be resting as well.

I deserved it.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

It's been hours since Komachi left. I decided to get up from bed and head downstairs to stop my stomach from pinching itself any further. I wondered if Komachi left anything for me to eat.

As I headed downstairs, went straight to the kitchen there was some toasted bread wrapping over a plastic sheet on the table.

 _What, no rice?_

Mom probably told her that I shouldn't be eating something heavy for now, and then I noticed there was a note stick on the fridge that says…

" _ **Onii-chan! I made you a special juice in the fridge, so bottoms up!**_

 _ **Komachi (' v ')"**_

 _Special juice? Sounds suspicious…_

So I opened the fridge to check this 'special juice' she made, when I did, in front of me in the fridge was the glass of juice…a red juice…

If asked, what's the juice made of and why it's red, both question unsurprisingly had the same answer.

I slowly closed the fridge and pretended like I never read the note or open the fridge.

… _Nothing happened…_

I sat down at the dining table and ate the toast, while eating I checked on my phone and it was already ten minutes pass lunch break. I pondered whether I should call her to check up on her or not, she could be busy, but then again it's lunch break. I should then.

I dialed up her number and waited for her to pick it up.

[….]

[….]

[Hello?]

"Hello, Yuigahama?"

[Ah, yaha-…umm…] Yuigahama was fretting.

"Something wrong?" I asked.

[Could you hang on for a moment?]

"Y-Yeah. Su-"

 _What's with her?_

Yuigahama ended the call before I could finish answering her.

After more than a minute she called me back.

"Oi, what was that for?" I was slightly annoyed.

[Well…you…called me all the sudden…] Yuigahama was fretting.

"And?"

[You could've texted me before calling…]

"Why? Are you ashamed of engaging a phone call with someone like me?" I was a bit impatient there.

[No no no! It's not I'm ashamed, it's just embarrassing…]

 _Still, in a way that's still the same thing._

[I was around with my friends…and…now I'm not…but if I did…]

[If I'm calling you in front of them…they migh-….they might get the wrong idea.]

My cheeks instantly reddened…Yuigahama was no doubt flustering the whole time on the other side of this phone as well.

"R-Right…my bad then."

[But…I'm glad you called me.] Yuigahama mumbled something quietly.

"How are you?"

[I'm fine. You?]

"I can't say the same." I sighed.

[Yeah, Komachi told me. Have a speedy recovery then!] Said Yuigahama in high spirits.

"Thanks. How are things in school?" I asked.

[When you ask that, do you mean…]

"Yeah…"

Yuigahama fully understood what I was asking about, she sounded nervous but she answered me.

[You know how rumor spread quickly in school; everyone was kind of surprised that someone actually broke up with Hayato-kun.]

"Well they should be…"

[Some were saying, that it was Hayato-kun that dump Yukinon.]

 _Of course no one could imagine a girl would actually dump someone like Hayama._

[And…]

Yuigahama was hesitating.

"And?"

[Some say you were the root for their break up…]

Oh, why am I not surprised.

"Alright…go on."

[People say you're Yukinon's stalker…then you punched Hayato-kun]

[…So people think Yukinon dump him so you would…]

[…Stop hurting Hayato-kun] Yuigahama let out a forced laugh.

 _Wow, it's only one time and people already assumed that much?_

 _To think people actually have in mind even that kind of scenario? These people are even twisted than me!_

Still, I wasn't all upset but rather amazed. The fact that those people thought about it, only proves they've experienced it before…it's either they're the victim of such scenario or the suspect, or they're just idiotic people who watched too much drama from televisions.

I cleared up my throat after giving some thoughts on the rumor speculating around me, but to be honest I don't really care.

[Ah! But don't let it get to you…not everyone believe you'd do that and are trying their best to stop it.]

Yuigahama was cheerfully trying her best to cheer me up even though I wasn't at least upset to begin with or care if that mattered.

[Iroha-chan for starters, she threatened anyone to detention if she hears anyone talking about you like that.] Yuigahama laughed wearily.

 _I know she's the president, but she can't actually do that_

… _can she?_

[Then there's Yumiko]

"Huh?"

[Every time we overheard someone whispering about you, Yumiko always gave them this scary look on her face and they just stop talking!]

 _That's…nice of Miura, I guess._

[It's so amazing Hikki! I want to do that too!] Yuigahama sounded like an excited child on the phone causing me to slightly smile.

"I…won't recommend that." I muttered.

[Huh? Why not?]

"You're not fit to scare people."

[Huh!? I can when I choose to be!]

"Oi, not too loud. You'll attract attentions." I warned her.

[Don't worry; I'm outside the building now.]

That explains why I kept hearing the sound of wind blew by the call; she must be somewhere high…on the roof perhaps.

"That's pretty thoughtful, even for you." I said nonchalantly.

[What do you mean even for me!? Meany!]

Yuigahama exaggerated loudly on the phone, I decided to move my phone a bit further from my ear just in case.

Because at this rate, anything I say would erupt her loudly.

[Hey, Hikki.]

"Yeah?"

[…Last night…what did you say to Yukinon?] Yuigahama sounded agitated; it seems she suspected something on what happened between me and Yukinoshita that night.

"…"

[When Yukinon, came back in…she looked pale, and…like she cried…]

"I never did or said anything that hurt her…" I said and continued on.

"She did that to herself." I respond with absolute. There wasn't any doubt with my answer, harsh maybe but not as what she did.

[Hikki…]

Naturally, Yukinoshita was supposed to be the wrong one… for lying, hurting the people around her, even Yuigahama…but deep inside me…

I was the one at fault, for trusting her, for opening myself completely. I should've seen it sooner but I let my feelings and trust for her to blind me.

But who could say…

It's too soon for anything; I can't think or decide yet until I listen to what Yukinoshita have to say.

 _So for now…_

"How's…Yukinoshita…holding up at school?" I feel so embarrassed for asking that, but I had to know.

[Well…Yukinon went around apologizing to Yumiko this morning.]

[Yumiko was cool with it and said that it wasn't Yukinon she's mad at to begin with, but Hayato-kun.]

[Then Yumiko said something like "I don't give a crap what happen to that pretty boy anymore but if he dies anytime soon, I won't say I'm not glad.] Yuigahama finished imitating Miura's voice, which was terrifyingly identical.

"W-Wha…" my hand trembled briefly.

[I know right! That's horrible to say!]

 _H-Horible? It's more than that word alone._

[But somehow, even I think Hayato-kun deserves it…maybe...no, Yes he does!]

 _How could she be so perky saying something like that?_

[But enough about that, since you're asking about Yukinon…do you want to talk to her?]

I froze all the sudden and brows furrowed.

[She was with me before you call, I could ask her to-]

"No. Never mind."

[Ah Okay.]

I could tell Yuigahama was upset that I didn't do what she expected, that was talking to Yukinoshita. Yuigahama never liked quarrels among friends and uncomfortable silences especially when it's between me and Yukinoshita.

"I…am going to talk to her, but not now. Its school and lunch break is almost over for you guys. So now's not the best time."

[Oh? Ah! of course.] Yuigahama then laughed briefly.

[I'm glad.] Yuigahama mumbled softly to herself.

"Umm…anyway, I'll be going now…sorry if I wasted your time."

[Not at all, I'm glad you called me anyway…I was a bit worried since last night.] Yuigahama's voice softened.

"Thanks…"

[No prob, Hikki.]

"And Yuigahama…"

[Hmm?]

"…I'll see you tomorrow." My lips formed a small smile on its own.

[…] Slightly surprised, Yuigahama gave me a brief silence and returned a response.

[Mm… See you tomorrow too.] Yuigahama replied softly with a warming voice on the phone as we ended our phone call conversation.

I laid down my phone on the table and let out a deep breath while staring upwards.

 _That is, if I'm healthy enough before tomorrow._

After I finished eating and washing the plate, I returned to bed, planning to get plenty of rest so I may recover quickly before the day ends.

I dived myself onto the bed and quickly wrapped myself with my blanket, like a caterpillar in its cocoon.

 _This feels good!_

I wondered then, if Yukinoshita even talked with Hayama today even after what happened. She still staying at her folk's place?

 _Just why should I be concern about her?_

I ignored the thought of her, shut my eyes softly.

And after a while without any hint I was already fast asleep.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

The sound of the closing door coming from downstairs woke me up from bed. I groaned and unwrapped myself from my blanket to check the time on my cell.

I sat myself on the bed and rubbed my eyes before reaching towards my phone on the bedside.

It was already forty minutes past one in the afternoon. I wondered who came back.

Mom? No can't be, she'd never leave work early.

Pops? Highly unlikely.

Komachi? Possibly, but shouldn't she be having her club activities right about now?

She probably skipped today to check on my condition. _Oh Komachi!_

Her slow footsteps were heading upstairs, walking closer towards the direction of my room.

It sounded awfully lighter even for Komachi, though if it were her she would just run her way upstairs since its home, guess she didn't want to wake up her sick onii-chan.

Her footsteps stopped in front of the door of my bedroom. My eyes were fixed on the faint shadow underneath the door, and slowly went up to the doorknob, waiting for the door to be opened.

 _What's with this suspense?_

I stared at the door and wondered why she just standing there. The silence was irritating and the waiting made my patience grew tiresome.

I sighed annoyingly.

"I'm awake Komachi so just get in." My shout startled the presence and slightly yelped on the other side of the door.

The feminine yelp surprised me. My eyes to widen and my mouth gape. I gave myself a brief silence.

After a while, I slowly opened my mouth and called my little sister once more.

"K-Komachi?"

The silence was gone by a response by an unexpected voice behind the closed door.

"I-It's me."

The voice startled me and slightly aback me, because that voice wasn't Komachi's.

"Yu-kino…-shita?"

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

No matter how much I've rinsed my face with water, I wasn't really dreaming or hallucinating that Yukinoshita was in fact here right now, in my house.

I've asked her to wait downstairs while I went to bathroom to tend myself.

I closed the tap, and stared briefly at myself in the mirror.

 _Why is she even here?_ More importantly, how is she in the house?

I pondered for a moment, and then something came to mind from this morning, there's no doubt this was her doing.

 _Komachi…._

However, it's pointless to even argue with that brat later, in fact it'll only backfire.

I chuckled at my reflection in the mirror, and slowly shook my head smiling like an idiot right now because of my sister.

Yes, I did say to Komachi that I will talk to Yukinoshita but I never mentioned anything about when.

I sighed to myself and rubbed my head with my right hand. I supposed I should've been more specific with her.

I exited the bathroom and headed downstairs, to see if she was still there. Unsurprisingly she was, in her school uniform, sitting silently on the couch of the living room. I slowly walked up from behind, as I got closer I noticed a key on the coffee table…it's the spare key of the house.

So Komachi really did plan this out.

As I got into her field of vision, she glanced at me with a worried look and quickly averted her gaze from me.

 _She still hasn't gotten over what happened._

I'll try not to jump to conclusions or unnecessary emotions just yet; first it was to listen to her just as Komachi said.

For Komachi, I repeated in my mind.

I took a seat on the left side far end of the same couch while she was sitting on the opposite position. We both gaze at the opposite direction in silence for a while.

At first I had something in mind, but facing her in front of me was harder than I imagine that my mind went blank immediately, and the plan in my head just faded because of the tension.

"U-Umm…"

I turned my head slowly to Yukinoshita who was trying to say something. At least one of us was trying to get out of this atmosphere.

"H-How are…you?" she asked.

It seems she was well-informed about my sickness.

"I…uh…I'm fine…I think." I replied awkwardly.

"Oh. I see…."

"…"

"…"

"Do you…want anything to drink?" I asked with a hidden intention to excuse myself from this atmosphere.

 _Say…yes…._

"No-…I mean ye-…I mean, there's no need to trouble yourself…but thank you." Yukinoshita also wasn't doing any better than me.

"Right."

"…"

"…"

We averted our gaze once again.

It wasn't long after; a profound silence filled the uncomforted atmosphere again. At this rate, we're just rubbing two woods with no hope to start a fire.

 _If only Yuigahama was here…damn it…._

* * *

 **Sorry for ending the suspense so short, but never fear…there's more to it in the next chapter.**

 **Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed it!**


	14. There goes his peace and quiet p2

**I'll be updating slowly just so you know.**

 **QS- Woops sorry about that, guess I made a major mistake on that one. Thanks.**

 **Bj, I think- yeahhh sorry if I rush and killed you, but I won't be making it long so people won't get bored.**

 **GuestSSSS- thanks!**

* * *

 **Chapter 9: There goes his peace and quiet 2/2**

* * *

It was Monday afternoon, my last day of suspension.

I thought I would spent my last _peace_ and _quiet_ in bed but somehow,

An unexpected visitor, showed up in the Hikigaya household. Probably the last person I would've expected.

Komachi, no doubt had something to do with her presence in the house, but I was partly to blame so I won't bring up about it later.

It's been a few hours.

We were currently sitting on the couch, and had been watching numerous shows in different channels on the television in silence ever since. We didn't talk much but if we did, it would be just an excuse to act like the atmosphere wasn't as awkward and uncomforting as we think but we're wrong on that part.

Our stares were focused completely on the television and our mouths were sealed tightly unless we had something to say.

"Where's…Kamakura?" Yukinoshita asked, still uncomfortable.

"Around." I answered in reflex.

"O-Oh."

 _Why did I answer like that… should've kept the flow going._

I sighed briefly.

 _My lack of specifity is what got me in this situation in the first place…stupid, idiot Hachiman._

"Umm…may I use the bathroom?" Yukinoshita asked, again.

I can't tell whether she really wanted to use the bathroom or just an excuse to temporarily discard herself from this atmosphere but who was I to say no to a woman who wanted to use the bathroom despite her intentions.

"Sure…you still remember where it is right?"

Yukinoshita glared at me briefly before looking away from me again.

"Of course." She quickly stood up and started towards the stairs.

"How do you think I got here…idiot." Yukinoshita muttered quietly as she walked upstairs.

 _Oh? She acknowledges her terrible sense of direction? Ha…_

 _I admit, it's been a while since we talk though I would hardly call this talk at all…_

Once the door of the bathroom was heard being opened and closed, I took this moment to think of another attempt to smoothly proceed on my objective with Yukinoshita.

 _But wait…_

If she's here, does that mean she had the same purpose as I do? Surely Komachi was the one who told Yukinoshita to come here, but not without a reason…could that reason be the same as mine? Or did Komachi somehow was slying with her words tricking Yukinoshita to be here?

 _If so, she's not doing as well as I am…_

The fact that Yukinoshita was still here, tells me that she's not planning to leave anytime soon until we sorted things out.

She realized herself that she was in the wrong; the guilt was hers to carry alone…that's why she's here.

If only Yuigahama was here, things would surely go smoothly, but I can't rely on Yuigahama all the time to smooth things between me and Yukinoshita. It was bound to happen sooner or later.

I stood up from the couch and spaced myself out.

 _What should I do? In a sense, I don't really need to do anything…_

But things won't go anywhere at this rate unless one of us spits it first.

I checked my phone again, and it was… a half hour past three.

 _What!? That long!?_

Then, the sound of the front door clicked and opened.

"I'm home." The familiar voice announced her return to the Hikigaya household.

She walked through the hallway and noticed me in the living room from the distance.

"Mom?" I was bewildered at her early returned from work.

"Hachiman? Shouldn't you be resting?" my mom walked closer towards me and quickly placed her right palm on my forehead.

Her speed startled me.

"Hmm…it seems you're okay." said my mom as she softly rubbed her palm against my forehead.

I stared at her and blinked my eyes twice.

"Mom…you sure are early..."

"P-G Hachiman. I'm still on duty with your suspension, besides I had an early meeting this morning that consumes hours and hours of my work time so… it's fair that some of us were allowed to return home early." She explained and withdrew her hand from me.

"Ah…I see."

She stared, focusing on my face as if she was examining my facial expression.

"Why so surprised? Are you hiding something?" my mom narrowed her eyes and looked at me suspiciously.

"Well…"

My mom giggled all the sudden.

"Don't worry son. I know you're having a friend over…"

"I noticed the pair of shoe outside and that school bag over there, certainly it's not yours." My mom pointed her finger on the schoolbag that was lying on the floor next to the couch.

 _Ah right…_

My mom winked at me and threw her handbag on the couch.

She walked straight to the kitchen while I remained standing in the living room and kept my eyes on her the whole time.

"So who is it?" my mom opened the cabinet of the kitchen and took out a glass as she poured some water in it.

This won't end well if I answered her honestly. My mom's really strict when it comes to uninvited guests, especially when it's a female guest.

My mom particularly had a lack of trust towards any female acquaintances of mine…the reason was very ridiculous but sensible in a way. It's because she thought it's impossible that any female would interact with a _creature_ like me, not without an ulterior motive.

That includes Komachi as well.

The very reason stung my gut but the Brightside was she cared for my well-being.

"Hachiman."

"Uh…oh. Yeah?"

"The longer it takes for you to answer my question, the more reason I'm suspicious of this 'friend' of yours." My mom drank her water and continued focusing her gaze at me.

"Sheesh mom, there's no need to make a big deal out of it."

"You idiot. This is a small house. I'll be seeing that friend of yours anyway." My mom placed her right hand on her temple.

 _Fair point…_

"Fine, it's Yukinoshita." I answered her.

"…"

"…"

 _No response?_

"Ah…a Yukinoshita huh?" my mom grinned forcefully slightly twitching on the side of her lips.

 _What's with that tone?_

The way mom says about a Yukinoshita every time it's as if our family generation had some sort of a feud with them during the Edo period. It wouldn't surprise me if it's true though.

"That reminds me, where's Sable mom?" I asked.

"Don't try changing the subject."

"I'm being serious mom." I narrowed my eyes at her to my annoyance.

My mom let out a sigh.

"The thing was noisy chasing Kamakura around the house this morning, so I put the thing at the backyard."

 _What!?_

"Apparently, Komachi said it was just playing with Kamakura but I think it's trying to eat Kamakura."

That's dark!

"And you put Sable out? Are you an air head or what?" I asked out of panic.

My mom immediately slapped my head with her left hand.

"That hurts!" I groaned and rubbed my head to relieve the pain from my head.

"That's no way to talk to your mother." My mom averted her gaze and rubbed her palm.

"Don't worry; I feed that thing already and tied it onto something so it won't get lose." My mom adjusted her glasses and gestured me with her right hand to calm my panic down.

That's reassuring I supposed. She could've just mentioned that earlier.

The sound of footsteps descending down the stairs grabbed our immediate attention; both my mom and I turned our gaze to her as she walked slowly downstairs.

"Hello." My mom put up a smile to Yukinoshita while she had a surprising look on her face then stuttered as she speak.

"H-Hello. I'm-"

"It's okay. I know who you are." My mom gave out small laugh.

"No, I haven't properly introduced myself to you. So please, allow me." Yukinoshita bowed her head in front of my mom.

My mom looked blank for a brief moment but returned a smile on her face.

"I-It's nice to meet you. My name is Yukino Yukinoshita. How do you do?" Yukinoshita introduced herself and gave a small warming smile to my mom, despite that, she was obviously nervous…though who wouldn't be nervous around my mom?

My mom let out a warming chuckled before returning a response to Yukinoshita's introductory.

"My name is Hebiko Hikigaya, I'm pleased to meet you…umm…" my mom's introduction was cut short for some reason, Yukinoshita however understood what my mom was referring to.

"You may address me whatever as you please." Yukinoshita gave a hearty smile and placed both her overlapping palms on her skirt.

"Yukino then. Is that alright with you?"

"It's fine. There's no need to burden yourself with such formalities."

My mom gave a smile at Yukinoshita.

"Then, I'm please to meet you Yukino, come have a seat."

My mom gestured Yukinoshita to the couch. Both my mom and Yukinoshita took their seat on the couch while I took mine on the chair next to them.

"My son rarely has anyone he spends time with aside from his sister and his cat. Let alone a lady. Thank you for taking care of my son, it must be hard to manage with him."

"Oi mom, what are you on about?" I gave my mom a slight glare.

Yukinoshita ignored me and quickly intervened as she continued her conversation with my mom.

"Not at all. Indeed he does lack self-restraint, and he doesn't hold anything back, however that part of him sometimes proves to be most useful and effective in some occasion, unfortunately, especially during our club activities."

 _She reverted back herself just by talking bad in front of me? I'm not saying I'm not glad but now I prefer the silent snow queen from hours ago._

My mom placed a palm over her mouth in stopping herself from bursting in laughter.

"Oh? So it's true he did join a club, but that's really unlike him…I mean he's…" My mom shooted up an eyebrow, pondering at Yukinoshita.

"It's because it was never his intention but he was simply…a request from a teacher." Yukinoshita replied which caused my mouth to formed a small grin by the thought of it.

"A request? What kind of club is it anyway?" my mom reluctantly asked.

"It's a service club. We help those who requested our help. We provide solution and resolve their situation."

"Basically, we're more or less like a handyman fixing everyday problem" I added.

"Ah, is that so? That makes sense and why Hachiman needed to be fixed." My mom chuckled.

 _What's that supposed to mean?_

"If I knew such a club existed, I would've done the same thing and send Hachiman there." My mom added and laughed shortly after.

 _You make it sound like as if the service club is an asylum or something._

"Maybe you're the one needed to be fixed. You have that complex you know." I retorted irritably to my mom to which she responded by glaring her eyes at me.

I froze instantly and slowly averted my eyes away from her silently.

"Hachiman…how about you make yourself useful and bring us something to drink." I slowly returned my gaze to my mom, and she had this smile on her face. I couldn't helped but think there was something sinister behind that smile.

"Yes." And so I do what I'm told and went straight to the kitchen, while mom and Yukinoshita remain seated conversing with one another.

Even so I continued listening to their conversation while pouring flavored juices in the glasses.

"Ah, Yukino…I've been meaning to apologize to you for what happened at yesterday event, I hope I didn't-"

"No there's no need for you to apologize…I'm the one who should apologize for having you and your son involved in my family matter." Yukinoshita frowned and dropped her gaze down to her lap.

"Well…it wasn't exactly my choice to be involved, but it was my son so I had no choice but to step in as well. You know, as a parent, he's problem is my problem." My mom laughed wryly.

Yukinoshita remained silent in that position, her guilt was obvious by her expression.

"…But, Hachiman was very determine and passionate to help you. You know how he is, he's usually a slacker, minding his own business so it's actually the first time I've seen him acting like that." My mom softly smiled to Yukinoshita as she added that.

Yukinoshita, slowly lifted her head up looking surprised with a gape mouth.

I stopped pouring, and stayed in my position as I listened to her from the distance.

"He went to such extent and blurted out such words out of his character just to help you." My mom placed her hand on her chin and chuckled.

Yukinoshita's widened eyes were fixed on my mom and her ears continued listening to her.

"You must be someone important to him, someone special…"

"That's not true…" Yukinoshita quietly voiced out her opinion.

"I'm not…I'm sorry but I'm nothing but a burden to your son and the people around me. I don't-"

"You think you don't _deserve_ to be…but…do you, _want_ to be that kind of person to my son?"

Yukinoshita lightly bit her lips and gave a brief silence.

I stared at those two, also waited for Yukinoshita's response to her question, if she's planning to answer it anyway.

Yukinoshita then made a slight nod, indicating she had the intention of fulfilling that desire.

I wasn't surprised nor felt anything. My mind just went blank.

My mom, however, smiled and opened her mouth.

"Then start making the effort to be one…"

"Even when things are crumbling down it's never impossible to rebuild what's broken when he's still around watching you making that effort…" My mom all the sudden her lips slowly frowned and her eyes dropped down to her knees.

As soon as she was aware of herself,

My mom briefly made a surprised look then adjusted her specs and quickly returned smiling.

"I don't know how to…" Yukinoshita looked away from my mom.

"Well that's up to you, but I can tell you where to start…" my mom waved her index finger, and immediately Yukinoshita returned her gaze to my mom, paying her utmost attention to my mom.

"You can start making up by staying for dinner." my mom chuckled warmly.

 _Huh?_

"I…uhh…" Yukinoshita was stuttering, she seemed like she had no idea how to respond to that. It's a simple yes or no, but I prefer not to.

My mom reached out to Yukinoshita's right hand and held it softly.

"Please, I insist." Once again, my mom intervened.

Though, I can't just stand idly by.

"Don't I have a saying in that?" I asked from the kitchen.

Both my mom and Yukinoshita shifted their gaze to me.

"No."

 _Instant answer!_

"Like it or not she's staying, which reminds me…you owe me."

"Huh? What are you on about again?"

"Hachiman, if it weren't for my intervention yesterday…you would've look dumbfounded the entire day. So of course you owe me."

 _So you didn't do that out of the goodness of your heart as a mother?_

Disappointed as I was however, fact still remains, I pretty much owe her an undying gratitude.

I nodded my head.

"Good. You can repay me by letting Yukino stay for dinner."

As if I had any choice to reject that.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

It was already early evening.

Komachi safely returned home, and was happily surprise to find out that Yukinoshita was staying for dinner.

She was even more surprised that I didn't argue, to be honest I do wanted to argue…it's just I didn't have any right yet to argue thanks to my mom, but as soon as I finished owning my debt, then I can argue.

As for pops, mom told us that he won't be home for dinner, she said that he'll be spending the night out with his colleague…that's actually my mom's way of saying he'll be having a drunk night out.

Me and mom weren't any good in cooking, if there's anything we can cook, it's the simple dishes like curry and instant noodles so we left the two young ladies to cook dinner in the kitchen.

"Komachi-san. be sure to pour in the chicken once the water is boiling." Yukinoshita in an apron asked while chopping onions on the chopping board.

"Yup yup! Don't worry Yukino-san, I am 100 percent sure the chicken stew will be out of this world with Yukino-san here." Komachi also in her apron was helping out Yukinoshita in the kitchen.

I've been glancing at those two for a while now from across the living room even though my eyes were supposed to be on the television in front of me, but my eyes were forcing itself on its own.

"Hikigaya-kun. Don't think I didn't notice your stare from here." Yukinoshita's voice startled me, it's amazing how she notice that even with her gaze and hands were still focusing on cutting ingredients for dinner.

"If you want to help just ask, otherwise, stop looking at us like a first rate stalker, try not to drool while you're at it." She rudely added.

The corner of my mouth slightly contorted and I quickly averted my gaze from her.

"What do you take me for? A dog? Besides you're a stranger in this house…it's only natural for the residents of this house to stare at an outsider like you." I spoke out my annoyance to her.

"Technically, I'm a guest so it's mandatory for you to show manners to your guest, not rudely staring at one and to answer your first question, the very reason as to why the idea of a dog is the first thing that crosses your mind only implies that you yourself do accept your action is more or less of those…of a dog."

I fazed a bit as she continued on while peeling of the carrots.

"Don't say I was the one who suggested you're a dog. You brought this on yourself, Hiki-doggy-kun." Yukinoshita harshly retorted my response followed by a triumphant little smile on her lips.

 _Speaking of dog, maybe I should let lose Sable into this house if it helps keeping your mouth shut._

Komachi doesn't seem to mind our squabbling, as she continued her position in the kitchen while humming to herself.

"Now now, you two…" My mom showed herself and tried to calm the tensioning atmosphere between me and Yukinoshita from rising any further.

"Hachiman, I know she's beautiful and all but there's no need to stare at her like that…" I flushed towards my mom's nonchalant statement.

"That's correct, it's rude to-"

"Although, I don't think she mind if you continue to stare at her for a bit longer…if she noticed that you were staring at her from the start, she would've stopped you earlier."

Yukinoshita reacted the same as I did; she was visibly blushing on the face and continued cutting the variety of vegetables on the kitchen table.

"And you couldn't keep those eyes away from her for more than 5 seconds from what I saw, Hachiman. So both of you are at fault." My mom added nonchalantly and chuckled.

' _What you saw'? You mean you've been watching us secretly? Creepy…_

"Oooooh…Yukino-saaaan…." Komachi made a sly grin and giggled while stirring the boiling pot on the stove.

I glanced at Yukinoshita once more. She remained silent and continued doing her kitchen routine.

Yukinoshita may be good at keeping her emotional reaction in check, however, I can't say the same for her facial reaction, her face was visibly glowing red.

I returned my attention to the television. At the corner of my eyes, mom removed her glasses to wipe the lenses and took her seat next to me on the couch.

"Hey Hachiman."

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry about earlier." Said my mom.

"Huh?" I was confused to what she was referring to that she needed to apologize.

"What I said, it kind of made me sound like I was doing it for the pleasure of having you on a leash… "

 _Weird way to put it…_

She adjusted her glasses back to her face and slowly turned her head towards me.

"I didn't really mean it, but it's the only way to persuade you in letting Yukino stay for dinner…consider current events, you know."

It seems my mom noticed the current mood between me and Yukinoshita, but I supposed for now…thanks to my mom, it's on hold for the time being.

"Don't worry about it. I've done horrible things to people that seemed normal to me, so I get it." I casually said, and returned my gaze to the television…

My mom suddenly giggled.

"What?"

"Oh, it's just… I guess we're a lot alike than I thought." She chuckled.

"Sure…"

"But Hachiman…"

"Hmm?" I slowly turned my head in reflex.

"Yesterday, I did what I did because I lo-"

"-You don't have to tell me that." I quickly shot up before she finished, but I was already flustering by the thought of it.

My mom surprised and then made a small laugh.

I instinctively averted my gaze from her.

Sometimes I don't know whether to be impressed or be annoyed by how my mom can be so direct with her feelings.

 _I mean, how can she say something like that without hesitation or a bit of shyness?_

But there were times that I admire her confidence and braveness for being direct with her feelings.

My mom glanced at the kitchen, and then I noticed she was staring me after. My body slightly twitched, because I was never used to being stared because most people didn't notice my existence to stare at.

"What?" I asked.

"Finished! You guys get to the table, its dinner time!" Komachi called out to us loudly from the kitchen telling dinner's now served.

Komachi was already sitting at the dinner table; mom quickly got up and went ahead to the dinner table.

By the time I arrived there, standing in front of my two family members sitting next to each other with a grin on their face for some reason. Suddenly, I flinched and realized who I will be sitting next to.

"Oooh, onii-chan…who'll be next to you I wonder…" Komachi quietly mumbled out to me and gave a cheekiest giggle.

"Sit down now Hachiman, Yukino will take her seat shortly after…" my mom may looked compose, but I knew underneath that composure appearance she was just as conniving as Komachi.

I glanced at Yukinoshita, she was busy pouring the warmed chicken stew on each small bowls. I sighed and took my seat anyway.

Yukinoshita, slowly walked to the dinner table and carefully passed down our bowl of chicken stew from the tray she carried to the table.

The scent of the chicken stew in front of me smelled delicious.

"Thank you for cooking these you two…"

Yukinoshita nodded and smiled responding to my mom's appreciation.

"Most of the recipe were from Yukino-san so the credits all yours Yukino-san!" Komachi grinned her teeth to Yukinoshita.

"Well…I won't say no to that, but I thank you for assisting me Komachi-san."

 _As always, honesty over modesty…_

"Take your seat Yukino." Mom politely intervened.

 _You just couldn't wait, could you mom?_

Yukinoshita briefly paused herself with a slightly surprising look once she saw the empty seat next to me, but she recollect her composure-ness and resumed slowly taking her seat next to me.

We hadn't been this close next to each other since last month, I admit it there was still a bit of awkwardness between our remained spaces on our seat, and hopefully this atmosphere won't ruin my appetite.

 _It'd be a waste to spoil such a wonderful aroma of a dinner._

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

After we finished eating dinner quietly but not exactly peacefully especially sitting next Yukinoshita, she probably felt the same way too…

Yukinoshita was washing the plates along with Komachi while me and my mom made ourselves a cup of warm coffee and went back to the living room. One for thing's for certain now, there's no such thing as a quiet moment when it comes to being alone with my mom.

As my mom took a sip of her coffee, she let out a satisfying sigh.

"Ahh, good coffee." She said as she smiled delightfully on her cup, with the steam from her coffee slightly fogged up her glasses time to time and she had to remove her specs to wiped it off when it did.

I drank my coffee but at the same time I waited nervously if I was correct what I thought earlier.

"Hey Hachiman."

 _I stand corrected._

"What now?" I asked.

"Huh? What's with that tone?" my mom turned her gaze to me.

"Whenever you want to talk to me about something, it always had to do with something I kept myself shut about from anyone, so considering today's topic what you're going to discuss with me will of course likely be…"

Both my eyes pointed towards the person who was currently in the kitchen with my lovely sister.

My mom looked blank, and turned her head casually to where my eyes were gazing.

 _Don't turn!_

"Well…I wanted to firstly ask about when will your friend be picking up her thing, but since we're on the topic of Yukino…"

 _Don't say someone's name out loud! It's an arrow to their ears!_

But fortunately, Yukinoshita's ears seem likely to be too busy listening to the sound of running water of the tap along with the clattering of the plates and glass on the kitchen sink as she washes them, and also Komachi's bickering mouth.

By the time i returned my focus to my mom...

My mom puts up a serious hard look on her face that was fitting with the look of her eyes gazing onto mine. My nervousness returned as a silent anxiety that slightly froze me due to her sudden changed in expression.

"Hachiman…you should-"

Immediately before she began, a few sudden knockings on the front door paused my mom along with the activities that was currently happening in the kitchen as all our attention was towards the direction of the door.

"I'll get it." I stood up and walked myself to the door.

Some part of me felt a bit relieve that it stopped my mom before she started running her mouth about Yukinoshita, either way we'll bound to continue the discussion sooner or later,

But,

I knew where she was heading…

We may not agree on many things but inevitably she and I have similar thoughts on how to execute the current situation between me and Yukinoshita.

Consider everything that's happened ever since I met Yukinoshita…

It may not be the best, but it's the logical and agreeable…

Solution.

I opened the front door, and was shook up in my head a bit but I remained calm and bored on my exterior.

"Yahallo. Hikigaya-kun."

Haruno Yukinoshita greeted me in front of the doorstep wearing a plain white sweater with a black undershirt followed by a gray knee length skirt.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Silly. I'm here for Yukino-chan. She's here right?" Haruno got close and examined the interior of my house over my right shoulder.

Footsteps approached from behind me still in her apron with her sleeves folded as she wiped her wet hands on her apron.

"Hikigaya-kun is that-…nee-san?" Yukinoshita approached me and Haruno at the doorstep and sounded surprised to Haruno's visit.

"Yukino-chan!"

Without further ado Haruno lightly pushed me aside of the door and ran towards Yukinoshita, then embracing her.

"Nee-san."

I watched as Yukinoshita looked like a frustrated cat struggle herself to be released from her sister's clutches.

"You should've called me. I was worried you know. I waited for you all day. I was starving to death." Said Haruno.

 _That phrase made you sound like you are more worried what will happen to yourself than your sister._

Besides, I wouldn't worry about her…heck I wouldn't dare to pick a physical fight with her.

"If you're hungry, please come in. We have leftovers." My mom overheard Haruno and walked over here to us.

Haruno immediately released her sister and quickly composed herself.

"Ah, it's okay. I already ate to be honest. Guess, I might've over-exaggerated a little there." Haruno then laughed it out wearily.

Haruno quickly cleared her throat.

"…And I apologize for this sudden intrusion." Haruno surprisingly apologized with such courtesy and respect she never showed to anyone then bowed her head.

I crossed my arms and leaned myself against the door behind me, as I was slightly fascinated but at the same time fazed by the sight.

 _Are you Haruno or Yukinoshita?_

My mom chuckled and placed her hand on her chin.

"That's really unnecessary. There's no need to strict yourself so please loosen up and feel free." Said my mom followed by a smile.

"Besides, I've already had enough people from work keeping up their image in front of Me." my mom muttered with a wearily look.

 _That's a shocker._

Haruno and Yukinoshita stared blankly at my mom.

Apparently, freedom is new to them considered their family status; self-control and self-image were forcefully applied to them. Yukinoshita recently but Haruno, her whole life had been keeping up image, wearing façade for her family's namesake.

I can't imagine the consequence if they disobeyed those two keys.

Haruno nodded her head and slowly put up a small smile on her face.

It wasn't her usual beautiful cold smile that was only for display like a diamond behind a glass to impress people,

but it was an innocent warm relieving smile, a rare display of Haruno.

"There, just like that." My mom gave a smile to Haruno.

"So would you like a drink?" my mom suggested as she walked back but stopped as Haruno politely rejected her kind offer because she had her reason for coming here.

"I'm sorry but…I didn't come here to stick around for long. I came here for Yukino-chan." Haruno slightly bowed her head once again to my mom before gazing at Yukinoshita.

"Nee-san?"

"We're being asked to return home to talk things out a bit."

The statement alone gave the space a moment of silence.

Yukinoshita bit her lip and stared down on the floor.

"I see… was it mother?" Yukinoshita asked as she lifted her face and stare directly to her sister.

Haruno shook her head indicating it wasn't.

"It's dad."

"Father?" Yukinoshita made a surprising facial reaction. Haruno lightly nodded at her.

"And what if I refuse?" Yukinoshita asked Haruno.

"It's actually a matter of yes or no. He simply only wanted to talk, but if you refuse then that's that."

Yukinoshita was fidgeting as she slowly turned her gaze to my direction but when I noticed, she quickly turned away.

She knew it herself that she can't keep relying on me to give a solution to every of her problem. If she did ask me, I won't say a word. She has to make her own decision this time.

No more waiting.

No more expecting.

And no more relying.

I would completely disagree if she refuses but it's her call to make not mine.

"In that case, we should at least hear what he has to say first." Yukinoshita answered her decision.

"Are you sure?" Haruno was worried, it seems she was on the opposing side of her decision, why wouldn't she?

After she knew and it was confirmed that her parents hid the fact Haruno was born by accident, she had every right to despise them and every reason not to see them.

While Yukinoshita was not what their parents expected, yet she gave them a chance. They're her parents after all, no matter what they did; it was the right call to make to settle things out.

"She's right, I think you both should see them and hear them out."

Both Yukinoshita and Haruno turned their gaze to the soft warming voice of my mom.

I remained silence against the door as I watched the scene in play.

"Your father, he may not seem like it but he cherishes both of you as his daughter in his own way. He's an important and a very busy man, so he wouldn't have called you if you weren't so important to him."

"And besides, men has a knack of being weak in expressing how they truly feel, am I right?" Mom placed her hands behind her, tilted her head and winked at my direction.

Both Yukinoshitas' quickly turned their heads to me in reflex and stared at me. I flinched and flushed a bit then looked away from them in embarrassment.

Mom adjusted her specs with the tip of her finger before continuing on.

"Despite what your mother did, she did it because she cared…and she cared because she loved you both. She just mistook what's right with what's wrong that's all but hopefully she won't repeat it but when she does, she has her daughters to show her the way."

"We all make mistakes. It's the wonderful part of learning and what makes us…well, us."

My mom smiled then she reached out both her hands to Haruno and Yukinoshita and held their hands together.

"Even so, no matter to how many times we turn to the wrong road and got lost along the way, we'll eventually find the right direction."

"With little friends named map and GPS of course." My mom giggled sweetly that managed to reassure those two and returned a smile to their faces.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

After a while, Yukinoshita and Haruno said their goodbyes and told us they decide to talk things out with their parents later. Me and mom watched them in the distance from our doorstep as they walked their way home together.

"Bye Bye Haruno-san! You too Yukino-san! Thanks for dinner!" Komachi was with us as well as she waved her hand high and shout her farewell loud and clear between me and mom at their backs.

"Careful. You'll wake up the whole neighborhood." I muttered at her.

"It's still early onii-chan, ah! But it's not too late for my bath!"

With those last few words, Komachi rushed inside and head upstairs to take her bath leaving me and mom alone still out.

Yukinoshita and Haruno were already long gone from our sight by the time we turned away from Komachi.

"Hey mom."

"Hmm?"

I placed my hands in my pockets, leaning myself next to the door and stared at the moon above the clear night sky.

"What you said back there…I couldn't have said it better myself…" I let out a breath while still gazing above.

My mom chuckled and places both her hands on her waist as she stared at me dominantly with a smug on her face.

"Of course you couldn't…" she released her hands and crossed her arms on her chest.

"And besides…I think you already know by now I'm very well-informed of her family. To be honest, I understood what you must've gone through…I had the same experience back then." Her voice suddenly sounded awfully sorrow.

I looked at my mom as she stared at the sky as well. I can't differ if it was sadness or anger on her expression.

I hesitated at first, but I asked away.

"Does it have anything to do with her…"

There wasn't any respond from her. She continued staring with her eyes focusing on the moon with a solemn look, her mind dwelling elsewhere; her lips didn't lift an inch or so to answer my question.

I was concerned. I wanted to know.

"Mom…what actually happened?"

My mom closed her eyes, and dropped her gaze.

"Hachiman…I know you must have a lot going on in your mind about me ever since yesterday. The revelations, the relations."

"I do want to tell you. I sincerely do, but the details are unnecessary for you to know. But one thing I let you know…"

"…it's because of her father,no...it's because of how kind I was back then, very ambitious, with a goal to make everyone else happy; I did something I regret from the past up until now… that's why…I don't want you to experience the same anguish as I still am now."

"I'm sorry…"

She was shaking, her voice trembling with sadness closed to sob but she maintained her composure, barely. My throat and chest tightened as I was shocked to see my mom in such a state.

It made me even more curious, what did she do exactly…

But I didn't want to caused her anymore pain than she's already in right now.

There was a part of me that I desperately wanted to leaned myself towards her and held her tightly to relieve her pain but I can't, I was still too weak to express such direct action…it's one of the things I lacked, and I hated myself for it.

I looked away, and quietly gritted my teeth behind my closed lips. I was ashamed of myself, that as a son…I couldn't do anything.

Suddenly, a gentle warm palm was pressing gently against my left cheek.

"Hachiman…"

"Sorry…" I earnestly apologized to her for my lack of trying.

But she laughed briefly as a response, which bewildered me.

"You're such a kind boy too, Hachiman…Just like how I was..."

"I'm not-"

"-I heard it all from Shizuka…"

I flinched out of surprised and remained silence.

"Regardless what you do and how you 'act' towards them, you're a kind boy Hachiman, that's why you didn't do all those request because it was part of an activity but it's because you sincerely wanted to help them."

"If it was just an activity to you, you wouldn't so much go through great length and hurt yourself in the process just to complete one."

"Kindness is a heavy burden to carry Hachiman. It bends you to do selfless things until you break because you don't want disappointment, yet you never wanted people to expect anything from you because you hate being helpless when you can't meet their expectations of you and you're aware of that…"

"…That's why, you chose to ignore everything, and you hid yourself, your existence because it was easier than saying no."

I was surprised by just how much my mom understood me. She wouldn't know unless she experiences the same as well. My chest was tightening itself, because my mom reminded me again the reason why I chose to be alone.

I never wanted to be alone, but if my life was any different and if I had friends back then…I never wanted to disappoint them, I would endlessly help them and try my best to meet their expectation…that's when I realized, it was nothing but a sham…my kindness was my curse.

I didn't want them to expect a thing from me but at the same time I didn't want to say no, that's why that very reason I chose to be alone; I chose to hide myself from the world because it was two birds with one stone.

My mom gently strokes her fingers on my cheek.

"The thing about kindness Hachiman…you can't tell whether people are there with you because they acknowledge you as someone…or they're just…"

"...Taking advantage of you."

 _...Taking advantage of you._

She withdrew her hand from me, I remained still and silence while staring down on the ground.

"I know how it'll go if you continue to be with Yukino, if you let her lean to you…that's up to you if you wished to continue but I don't."

So this was what my mom wanted to discuss about earlier, but I already knew, her intention… what she wanted…

"When you decided to talk things out with her…I want you…"

As expected…

"…To cut all ties with her."

* * *

 **hope you enjoy reading that, despite numerous error in my writing but oh well, until the next chapter.**


	15. My teen romantic comedy is wrong p1

**Okay, sorry for the late update…I was actually half done with it a 2 weeks ago then something came up and had to delay it for a while, but today I'm free and finished this in say 2-3 hours? I might have rushed it a little.**

 **We're on the road to the epilogue, HAPPY READING!**

* * *

 **Chapter 10: My teen romantic comedy is wrong as expected 1/3.**

* * *

The end of my five days of suspension also meant my return to reality.

School.

Here I was thinking, it would be a blissful and peaceful five days of rehab but what was I thinking, it was the complete opposite. Thankfully or perhaps unfortunately, the spring fever was gone and I was healthy enough for school, although I wouldn't mind if the fever extended its stay for a couple more days.

Everything returned back to the way it was.

Mom no longer waited for me in the morning nor she won't be returning home early like these last five days, because as of now, her duty of parenting guidance during my suspension and she went back to her regular work schedule and left early this morning.

As did I.

I was returning back to my usual routine before heading out, already dressed up in my school uniform, shirt tucked, blazer on and now currently staring at myself in the mirror. All the necessary adjustment on my appearance completed for school except for my hair, I tried combing it once but it always ended returning to its bizarre form.

My mind switched from my appearance to school.

There was nothing to look forward to returning to school.

I admit I was being sarcastic to myself; there was actually, based on what Yuigahama had mentioned over the phone.

I was already aware what waits for me in school.

I wouldn't be surprised if I was suckered an egg on the head for punching their school idol. Of course, they wouldn't actually do that, although I wouldn't put it past them just yet.

My eyes were still drowsy and sore; I didn't sleep well last night…after my talk with my mom last night.

Her words kept repeating itself over and over in my head giving me a long thoughtful night. It was a choice given to me by my mom; however, it sounded more of an order than a choice judging by her tone.

I understood her feeling as a mother to as why she wanted me to end it, _but is it what I wanted?_

 _Why am I even complaining? I should._

It was the right call after such deception and anguish from Yukinoshita. No one should complain or protest my decision after what I went through.

But mom only said when I decided to talk things out with Yukinoshita, so it was up to me when I would discuss with Yukinoshita of the related matter…that meant there's no need to rush things…

Only when I wanted to…

I quickly shook my head, snapping myself to my senses.

 _Why do I keep giving myself such excuse?_

"Onii-chan! Are you done yet!?"

I've completely forgotten Komachi was already waiting for me downstairs.

"Right. Coming." I informed loudly from my room.

I muttered with a sigh as I looked at my reflection on the mirror.

"Right. Let's do my best…today."

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Just when me and Komachi were approaching the school front gate, I stopped pushing my bike as I recalled something.

"Oi Komachi, how about you go on ahead to class first…I'll have things to take care of" I said.

Komachi stopped walking, raised a brow.

"You sure?"

I nodded, and gave her a reassuring smile from the edges of my lips.

Komachi softly backed away from me, raising forward one of her arms as a means of defense and gave me a disgusted look.

"Just kidding!" Komachi grinned and giggled

 _Was my smile that creepy?_

"Okay then! See you later onii-chan!" Komachi dismissed me and went ahead to the gate as she entered the school ground, displaying her eagerness for her still fresh high school life by running head on.

… _Just wait until you're in your second year…._

When Komachi was already at a safe distance away from me, I sighed tiredly and continued pushing my bike, proceeding myself to the bicycle area.

The students that arrived just as I have and mostly passing glances with either a glare or an annoyed look on their faces and started whispering to the person next to them.

The subject of their quiet discussion was most obvious; at least they cared enough to whisper away from my ears, either out of consideration which I highly doubt it or by human instinct which was very likely the case.

After I changed to my indoor shoes, and finally entered the school hallway, the lively atmosphere of the hallway quickly sank into a silent abyss.

Stares were stinging like a swarm of bees and murmurs were heard everywhere as I walked, revolving around one single person.

Me.

Under normal circumstance, a normal person would find this discomfort unsettling, but an experience person on the other hand, I've experienced the same ordeal countless times from my past and most recently after the cultural festival last year.

So this was hardly bothersome, but that doesn't mean it was to my taste considering my status as a loner, I was now much more like a nocturnal creature walking in the morning.

I was glad that Komachi was nowhere near me right now. I wouldn't want people to get the wrong idea about Komachi if she was seen with the guy who punched their precious Hayama, nor did I want her to be defending me out of sisterly love.

They might possibly think her as my accomplice, but if I know my little sister, was that she likely won't mind if people view her in that manner, but I would.

A single loud voice emerged itself amongst the students; she walked swiftly and breezily through the hallway passing through numerous students who mysteriously went silent all the sudden upon noticing her presence.

"Senpaiiiiiiiii!"

It was someone who I hadn't seen for quite a while, the president of Sobu High.

"Isshiki?"

Isshiki stopped in front of me, and drew her face closer to mine, causing me to stumbled back a bit from her.

"Welcome back Senpai!" Isshiki greeted my return energetically, giving a few pat on my shoulder.

Then she turned around, placing her hands on her waist and scanned the hallway. She made a few nods of her head for unknown reason.

"Good job everyone!" Isshiki shouted and raise her hand up high towards the students in her view, startling some of them in the process.

Isshiki gestured her fingers, offering to walk me to me class. I grew reluctant whether I should or not after witnessing the students' response to Isshiki, also there's a malicious stench around Isshiki …but I accepted her company anyway, what harm can she do publicly?

"I didn't think they would behave when senpai showed up." Isshiki mumbled quietly to herself.

"Well, they didn't not too long ago before you showed up." I whispered as we both slowly walked the hallway at a steady pace.

The students either went silent or averted their stares whenever me and Isshiki were passing through.

Not that I was complaining about this... 'Isshiki effect' towards the student but the look of every students and how they reacted, concerns me about Isshiki.

"What exactly did you do?" I asked quietly.

Isshiki stared upwards, tapping her index finger on her chin with a thoughtful look.

"Weeelllll…I may have set a few guys as an example." She replied.

"You're joking…right?"

Isshiki shook her head indicating she wasn't.

"You're literally abusing your power of your position." I denounced her.

However, my offense was quickly broken when she brought up her trump card, me.

"But SENPAI said I could do anything when I'm president, so I put it to good use for SENPAI. It's for SENPAI! So be grateful, SENPAI!" Isshiki pouted after exclaiming loudly on her defense.

My readied words ready to be executed for any possible argument from Isshiki were instantly choked in the throat by her unexpected retaliation using my own name in her defense.

 _She just had to bring up…_

I didn't argue any further, correction; I was finished before it even started.

I was the one who made her president after all, so in sense, I was responsible and to blame in all this…

I realized now I was more or less a scapegoat to Isshiki as a means for her defense from those who oppose her position as president.

 _I'm really pathetic…what did I get myself into?_

As we ascended up to the second floor, while walking the stairs, in front of me above the stairs, my eyes unexpectedly were met up with Yukinoshita, her figure stood between me and the sunlight filtering through the window behind her slightly blinding me.

She seemingly just arrived to school as well with her school bag still resided on her shoulder.

We both stopped and stared at each other briefly.

"Good morning." Yukinoshita greeted, looking composed and calm.

"Mor-"

"Senpai, why did you stop all the sud-…oh? It's you." Isshiki interjected my respond to Yukinoshita and quickly narrowed her eyes upon seeing Yukinoshita.

Yukinoshita wasn't fazed by the stare Isshiki gave her, but there was a hidden vexation on her eyes Isshiki.

"Good morning Isshi-"

"Save it. You gonna cause more trouble for Senpai again?"

I flinched immediately, Yukinoshita reacted the same by Isshiki's choice of words and sudden change in persona towards Yukinoshita.

I turned around and focused on Isshiki and she had a resentful look.

"Isshiki." I let my eyes did the talking, urging her to stop.

Once she understood the message, Isshiki darted her eyes at me questioningly, but made no move to argue. She briefly scowled at Yukinoshita one last time before quickly turning away from her.

Finally with a sigh, Isshiki turned herself around and began walking down the stairs.

"Later, senpai."

Her behavior was rather uncalled for. I didn't know she had it in her.

I returned my eyes on Yukinoshita, when I did she averted her gaze from me with a concerned worrying look.

"Does this happen often?" I asked casually.

Yukinoshita hesitated looking at me to answer the question and simply just nodded her head nervously.

She didn't behave like she was now yesterday. Probably because we didn't go nowhere near bringing up the subject of her…deception. Even I was feeling a bit agitated to discuss the matter at hand, because I had no idea how to describe it in words. Still,

The sooner, the better.

"Ever since…"

I immediately returned my attention to her as she suddenly spoke up.

I gazed at Yukinoshita who was visibly hesitating, as a result…she briefly took a breather trying to regain her composure to…whatever she was trying to say.

"E-Ever…ever s-since…" Clearly that didn't work.

Yukinoshita stuttered as she struggled to answer me through the looming guilt on her face but she fell into an immediate silence staring down to the floor, her lips bit, and fist slightly clenched.

"I get it." I understood what she was referring to; the reason why Isshiki behave with such attitude was also the same reason for my suspension.

Scratching my head and quickly dropped my hands, I took a step forward and continued walking, passing by her.

Before I proceeded further to the hallway continuing the journey to my classroom, I was by reflex stopped upon Yukinoshita's voice reaching out from behind me.

"Umm…"

My ears were sufficient enough that I didn't need to turn around to listen to what she was going to say.

"…could…w-we…walk together?"

I quickly turned around at her to my bewilderment.

 _Is she serious?_

Her request caught me off guard and stumble me a bit; also it wouldn't be a good idea considering the current situation here in school revolving around me.

"I don't think that's a good idea." I suggested, hoping she would be aware of it by now.

Yukinoshita walked closer and stopped next to me.

"Since when do you care what other's think?" Yukinoshita closed in her eyebrows and asked looking concerned.

"It's not that I care what they're thinking it's you that I-" I unconsciously slipped out my words without thinking and stopped myself immediately.

By the time I did, Yukinoshita flushed and averted her eyes away from me.

"I-I see. I don't mind."

With her response, I swung my head to the left, accepting her to walk with me.

We began walking through the hallway, as I suspected…the atmosphere as usual altered by my presence and without the Isshiki effect, the students resume and went about returning to their murmurings with their fellow companions, giving me an awfully unsettling look, but I tried not showing any facial reaction in response to the look they were giving me.

So far there hadn't been anyone here trying to make physical contact on me. Yukinoshita was aware of it as well, she didn't turn or look because it was noticeable so we continued walking and ignoring the stares and voices revolving around us.

"So where's your class?" Yukinoshita asked, judging by her tone, it seems she's calm now.

"Huh? You plan on walking me all the way to my class?" I asked her. It'd be surprising if she did.

"That _is_ the plan." She replied casually.

I didn't see a reason to reject her notion; I was beginning to get suspicious of her until I came to a sudden realization and answered her willingly because of it.

"Second room from the far end of the hallway." I directed her.

"That's far."

 _We're walking okay, there's not much effort to it. Is your stamina that pathetic? You're the one who offer yourself to walk me, stop complaining!_

"But it's close enough to saw you hanging with Hayama back then." I nonchalantly brought up about their so called relationship.

Yukinoshita quickly shot up a troubled look, then her lips frowned and her eyes slowly retreated to the floor we're walking on.

Once I digressed, she made an effort trying voice out a response.

"I…I-"

I sighed; it was annoying enough listening to her stuttering.

"I'm just messing you. Don't worry." I said, as harsh as it sounded however, I was slightly amused with her reaction on the subject while it lasted.

However, it was an odd and rare sight, seeing the perfectly ice composed Yukinoshita easily losing it just by bringing up the taboo subject.

If she can't stand it, why bother still walking alongside me? Any normal person would flee by the burden and the weight when bringing up a sensitive topic of theirs, although when did I ever consider Yukinoshita a normal person.

Walking with or without her wouldn't really make much of a difference to the situation around here, except it might give people new ideas to speculate another rumor of me or gave them confirmation to one of their baseless accusations.

Every attempt I had in trying to make Yukinoshita scurry away seemingly failed, it seems I was left with a direct approach, well not too direct as long as she gets the idea that I wanted her long gone from my side.

"Anytime you want to leave is fine by me." I muttered.

Then she quickly responds as if it was by reflex.

"I'm not leaving you." Yukinoshita mumbled softly yet strongly.

Her response stunned me for a moment; I chance a glance at her. She had an unwavering determined look on her face.

 _What's with her all the sudden?_

My mom's influenced no doubt; I did overhear their pep talk regarding me. _Is this…is she making an effort to…_

 _Even so, what would be the point?_

My eyes looked away out to the windows. It's been awhile since I've been to school so looking at the scenery from here was close to nostalgia.

As I stared at the solid transparent glass of the window, it was enough for me to notice the faint reflection of Yukinoshita's figure, her eyes stealing glances of me.

What's done was done. After what happened, nothing can ever go back to the way it was…

Such deception and mistrust, leaving me in languishment all because I hoped, believed and expected something… that something…

Nothing will ever be the same between us. Ever.

Everything was vague before, not anymore.

There's only one road we're heading to if we keep up this charade any longer. My mom knew it as well, and gave me an option…

To end between me and Yukinoshita or continue, and wait for things between us to slowly end.

A quick and painless death was the preferable option than a slow and painful death.

As I returned my gaze to my footing, a certain class caught my attention as we're approaching near it.

Class year, 3-D. The class designation of Hayato Hayama.

As we were passing the opened door of the class, it gave me a gap of time for my eyes to catch a short glimpse on that person that stood out within the group of students hanging around his table.

Hayama was sitting and engaged in a conversation with his fellow classmates around him.

As he noticed me passing by his class, he gave me a broad fixed smile like he always did.

I switched glances to Yukinoshita, she didn't show any hint of outward emotion as we passed along the class.

I started wondering if everything between her and Hayama had been settled.

Unfortunately today, I wasn't in any mood planning on neither being around the guy nor bugging around the topic.

"Yukinooooon! Hikiiii!"

Our attention shifted to the bright cheerful voice calling both of our given pet names by our one of a kind, loud bun hair girl who was charging towards us from her classroom.

This girl really had no sense of shame or embarrassment with her appearance or how she behaves especially in front of all these students in the hallway. Her loud voice attracted everyone's attention only briefly then they quickly lost interest after confirming the source of their curiosity.

"Good morning, Yuigahama-san." Yukinoshita greeted her, followed by a soft smile curling on her lips.

 _You didn't smile at me when you greeted me…_

"Ah, morning you guys!" Yuigahama happily smiled as she responds her greeting.

I simply nodded and headed straight to my class without delay.

"Huh? Hikki, where are you…"

"Check your time. Homeroom is almost starting." I informed her and kept on walking.

"He's right. I should return to my class as well. We'll talk later okay?" Yukinoshita's fainted voice reached my ears as she left Yuigahama.

Strangely, I felt one of them was staring my back.

As I entered the class of 3-E,

As expected, why should this class be any different from the others?

A complete, restless silence blooming throughout the room followed by scowling stares from every direction on me.

I nonchalantly proceeded to my table and took my seat.

"Morning Hachiman!"

He came from behind and greeted me normally. Despite the circumstance, he remains to be around me.

I would emotionally breakdown in tears about now if it wasn't for my self-reminder to self-restrain towards him on number of reasons, one of those reminders was… he's a male. _Don't forget that, Hachiman!_

Whether he greeted out of thoughtfulness, consideration or not, it didn't matter. Being greeted by him already turns my morning around.

"Morning Totsuka." I replied gave him a small smile, feeling warm and fluffy on the inside.

But it wasn't ill to be attracted to a feminine looking male, right? Nothing to be ashamed of, although, I should continue keeping this ill fetish to myself.

"Mooooooornin! Hikitani-kun!" Tobe sprung up from behind Totsuka and made his presence known to me as well.

 _Why are you even bothering me?_

"I'm surprised you're still around, Tobe."

 _Translation, go ignore me like the rest._

Tobe pressed his eyebrows together and looked stoned.

"What ya talkin about? Ohh ehhh, I geddit." Tobe snapped his fingers and cleared his throat before continuing on and threw in some annoying hand gestures as he started rambling on with his mouth.

"Ya see, I was there myself don't ya remember? Ya punch Hayato, it's bad I get it but people make up lying rumor about Hikitani-kun is even worse, so that ain't cool. Not cool at all in my book."

Tobe's gibberish clarification left my mouth agape. I was surprised or perhaps impressed, that Tobe rather than bowing to the opinions of the masses or joined the cult of Hachiman haters, he was actually being reasonable for the first time.

"Buuuuut, they'll be talkin bad behind my back if they see me hanging around with ya. So Hikitani-kun don't take it personal, no hard feelings if I ignore ya, it's just an act, cool?" Tobe winked his eye.

 _And here I thought for a moment there was hope for you…why do I even…_

"Sure." I replied slightly tempered by his conclusion.

"Coooool! You the man!" Tobe then ran off to his table, leaving me and Totsuka alone. Finally.

Totsuka had a dry laugh.

"Ah, Hachiman. Could you stay later this afternoon? We're having a group study again. If you're free that is."

"Sure." I instantly answered without so much giving a thought, because saying yes to Totsuka was now an instinct; Totsuka responded by giving me his serene lovely smile which furthers enlightened my mood.

The bell began ranging throughout the school which meant the start of homeroom. Students and outsiders in the classroom, returned to their respective classes and seats.

Totsuka lightly waved his hand at me as he returned to his seat as well.

The back door of the classroom slide opened.

Yumiko Miura showed herself, entering the classroom like a cool breeze during a summer day although it's still spring, probably not her season with that look on her face. She took a glance at me first as she passed my table before taking her seat in front of me.

A fierce looked as usual.

 _How can anybody stand around you with that look? Or better yet, how can a friend or someday, hopefully, for her sake or her future spouse, stand to look at you in the eyes?_

"Quiet morning huh?" She muttered while head in front; though it was obvious she was talking to me.

"Yup."

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

After sessions of homeroom ended, the time for lunch break had come. Most of the students in here left the class to buy their lunch and eat elsewhere.

Of course they would eat elsewhere because having me nearby would 'pollute' their environment.

Students who were still in the classroom either didn't mind themselves with the school topic of the day or they're one of the few people who held personal envy towards Hayama.

Yes, such people do exist, not everyone in school mutually worship the guy, but they should make an effort improving what they lack, rather than pathetically pity themselves in envy forever.

Upon rethinking that, I pondered then quickly startled to the realization.

 _Wait…_

 _Did her words actually just go through my head?_

 _No matter._

Influenced or not, anybody would have the same opinion. Anybody with a decent and wise conscience, that is.

Apparently my conscience was wise enough to tell me not to linger my presence any further around the school for the time being until things cooldown a bit , once people forgets about me again and went straight back to asking the same question all over, 'who was that guy again?' or 'who is he?' something like that.

Moreover, I was still a bit sleepy, so it made focusing on the today's studies less attentional. I spent the entire homeroom yawning quietly time to time and had my eyes stared deeply into Miura's hair.

 _It wasn't intentionally!_

Her hair just happened to be in front of me that's all, it was even close enough to catch a scent of her hair. _Smell nice too…_

 _Control yourself!_

The classroom door sprung opened loudly, which immediately caught the few attentions of the students still in the classroom, myself included, interrupting my ongoing thoughts.

It was just whom I suspected but not expected, Yuigahama.

She was scanning the room until her eyes target locked on me. She entered the classroom and made her way to my seat most likely.

I ignored her and continued resting my head on the table but as soon as her presence was felt in front of me…

"Aren't you supposed to be somewhere in particular? Specifically, with Yukinoshita." I stated, reminding her while head still resting on the table.

"Waaa! How do you know?" Yuigahama noisily over exaggerated.

"I overheard. There's nothing to be amaze about." I said slightly annoyed by her loud tone.

Yuigahama started moving the chair on Miura's desk and took her seat on it.

I sighed, and then lifted my head from the table; immediately my gaze was met with Yuigahama's broad smile.

I placed my chin to my hand, resting it.

"Anyway, when are you going to pick up your dog?"

"Huh?" Yuigahama's expression quickly turned blank.

"Huh? My mom's been bugging me about it yesterday."

She had a thoughtful look, briefly, and finally returned a response.

"I guess, I'll pick her up later then…so we're walking home together, okay?"

 _Was there ever the need to guess or think? Sable's your pet._

"Yuigahama…why are you here exactly?" I asked to which she responded off laughing wryly while rubbing the bun of her hair.

"Well…as stupid as it sounds, I just came here to look at you in your school uniform, yeah! I-I mean, i-it's just you know…nosal-…no…nostig? No, wait…Nastic?"

I sighed irritably at the frustration and hopelessness of Yuigahama. I grasped the word she was looking for, and answered.

"Nostalgic."

 _Really, it's only five days…not five months or years._

"Yeah! that's it!" She energetically clapped her hands together in relief.

"…"

"…"

"It definitely is stupid as it sounds, and it sounds about just right from you."

Yuigahama gave a brief laugh.

"I know righ-, Wait! That's not right!"

" _Gahama-chan~_ do us both a favor and buy yourself a dictionary." I purposely made a teasing remark of her.

Yuigahama winced, her face slowly glow red as she began stammering her words.

"Sh-Shut up! D-Don't call me t-that! Dummy!"

I averted my eyes from her to the window. Yuigahama stood up from Miura's seat and neatly adjusted her skirt and blazer.

"Yukinoshita is probably waiting for me…umm…" Yuigahama started to look hesitant about something; she kept altering her eyes between me and the door anxiously.

"Do you…want to tag along?" She asked weakly and casted down her face.

"Why? She invited you specifically, didn't she?" I tediously reminded her.

Yuigahama put up a weak smile.

"I know…but I think she's expecting Hikki too and…it's been so long since the three of us hangout and talk together…so…please?" Yuigahama evidently was trying to persuade me in tagging along with her to see Yukinoshita.

What annoys me was the fact that everytime she urged me to do something I dislike or would likely have an instant rejection answer, she always had to make that sort of face which caused me to feel sympathy and guilt in the process then eventually a scum after I did reject her in any form.

I deeply let out a sigh and rubbed my irritation off my head.

"Fine." As I answered her, I stood up and dragged my feet halfway across the classroom until I noticed Yuigahama wasn't moving and her face remained blank.

"Well?" I gestured her to walk.

Her expression slowly brightened up and smiled seemingly in relief.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Yuigahama was leading me ahead to where she would meet Yukinoshita. Furthermore, it was slightly awkward as we walked from hallway to hallway then descended floor to floor, whether it was the silence or the stares that the student gave us or me to be frank.

She took her 'secret' shortcut as she mentioned, at far end of the new school building as we headed further. This part of the building was somewhat new to me. However it was practically a ghost town, deserted.

Her knowledge of this desolated place strangely piqued my interest and suspicion.

 _How or when did she know this place? Guess I'll just ask her later._

I noticed just now previously while we were walking through the hallway among students, Yuigahama looked like she wasn't the least bothered by the surrounding or their stares, which was a relief.

On the other hand, surprisingly we bumped into Isshiki in this part of the building while we were just on our way to the ground floor.

Yuigahama instinctively blurted out our purpose in meeting Yukinoshita, and Isshiki's response was…

"No." Isshiki protested and stopped upon hearing our notion to meet Yukinoshita as we all stood on the sideway of the stairs, with no signs of any other presence aside from ourselves…very convenient.

 _You just had to be honest with her, don't you?_

Yuigahama could've just spun something up so Isshiki won't be such a nuisance obstacle.

"Why are you guys even meeting her? No means no." It seemed Isshiki was stubbornly persistent in cutting us from Yukinoshita.

"But Iroha-chan…" Yuigahama continued urging Isshiki to let us pass.

Isshiki clicked her tongue and pointed her finger at us.

"That's an order from your president!"

"S-Sorry!" Yuigahama immediately apologized in acknowledgement of Isshik's dominance in terms of rank and instantly bowed her head to Isshiki.

 _Oi you're the senpai here! Raise your head!_

"What did she even do to you to get you so worked up like this?" I asked out of my curiosity and bewilderment of Yukinoshita's involvement on Isshiki's recent change in nature.

She quickly darted her eyes at me, rephrasing the subject from her to me.

"To me? What about you!?" her voice slowly grew sharper and her expression was getting more tense.

"Huh? What about me?" Again she flung the subject elsewhere aside from herself, but she wasn't messing around this time, she let out a disgruntled sigh and took a step forward.

"How can you not be so worked up over it? Let me remind you…You were suspended for five days…You got your rep ruined…" Isshiki slowly walked towards me, forcing me to step back each time she gets closer step by step.

"…and all these people, trash talking around senpai's name…all because of her!" She was angered in both eyes and voice because she think it's Yukinoshita's fault…but she was mistaken.

I stopped from shrinking back any further and stood my ground, causing Isshiki to stopped pressing forward.

"Yes, and it's because I punched Hayama, from my action alone…so I'm responsible for all that's happened. Not her."

Not just in defense for Yukinoshita but also to clear up her misinterpretation of the situation but as expected she didn't care.

Isshiki dropped her gaze; her fist clenched tightly and shaking.

"It's not just about that…" Isshiki's voice was breaking and trembling.

"Isshiki, she didn't-"before I repeated my earlier response, Isshiki again interjected with a shattering sharped voice.

"-I already know it was just a goody two shoe act between her and Hayama-senpai!"

"Still, it's all the same. She hurt senpai! Lied to senpai!" She continued pressing my chest while emotionally bits by bits bursting out her trembling yet sharp words.

"And you, Yui-senpai…" Yuigahama startled upon being dragged into the quarrel by Isshiki as well.

"She took the one place you treasured the most without asking for your consent…She hurt Senpai, the one you…and you're just, what, going to let her slip by just like that? So easily?"

Yuigahama lightly pressed her lips, sinking into silence with a downcast expression. Isshiki altered her stares between me and Yuigahama in both confusion and frustration.

"Yet…why are you guys even still on her side!?" she screamed out her broken voice of disbelief and bewilderment.

I made no attempt in making any response because there wasn't any good reason or an answer to her question.

Isshiki breathe heavily, and coughed out a few times.

"Whatever her reason, that doesn't give her an excuse to just…throw senpai like some litter on the ground." Isshiki's muttered angrily.

My gaze was on the floor the whole time. Yuigahama was in silence the whole time as well, her lips slightly trembled every time Isshiki made a remark regarding Yukinoshita, and there wasn't a room for doubt to argue, because what Isshiki said was indeed true.

We were defending Yukinoshita out of ignorance.

Yukinoshita was clearly at the wrong but, me and Yuigahama weren't exactly obligate to judge. We can't really put or imagine ourselves in the same position as Yukinoshita...her family and her position was still too alien to judge her action as innocent or guilty.

"If it were…if it were me. I wouldn't let you go through all that!" Isshiki was visibly trying maintaining herself; her lips were bit tightly together.

 _At this point…_

"Yuiga…"

"Huh?"

My gaze remain focused on Isshiki.

"You go on ahead…I'm…"

Yuigahama gave me a weak smile and lightly nodded her head.

"It's okay Hikki." Yuigahama started walking away, further from me and Isshiki until she was nowhere in sight anymore.

I glanced at the stairs, walking towards it and sat on it. I patted my hand on the stairs, gesturing Isshiki to have a seat.

She nodded, obediently complied with it, while rubbing her eyes with her pink cardigan sleeves and took her seat on the stairs next to me, laying her palms on her skirt once she recollect herself, she was still sniffing however.

"I'm glad…You didn't go with Yui-senpai to meet…" Isshiki couldn't continue and just dropped her gaze.

I sighed.

"Don't take it the wrong way. It's not that I didn't want to. It's that…I'm just…"

 _I can't believe I'm saying this…_

"…Taking…responsibility for you."

Isshiki was surprised and chuckled weakly.

"If it means prioritizing me over Yukinoshita-senpai, then I can live with that…"

The bangs of her hair covered up the side of her face, making it harder for me to make out her expression with my eyes. I blew a gust of breath and scratched my head.

"Jeez…who knew you could get so worked up over some nobody like me." I smiled pathetically…of course I was definitely a nobody to someone like Isshiki.

"You're not a nobody Senpai…and you're definitely not just anybody to me." Isshiki murmured.

In that single moment, I couldn't defined the meaning behind her words; it's as if the words itself punched a void in my ongoing thoughts causing me to be in a loss of words.

Isshiki noticed my sudden silence and sneak a glance at me, examining my unresponsive face.

"Wow. You really do suck figuring these kinds of things…" Isshiki puffed up her cheeks, seemingly sulking to my lack of understanding.

"If you'd be more direct, maybe I would." I said in annoyance. Why do people enjoyed being so vague and indirect. Mysteries of the world.

"Fine, I'll spell it out. I like you Senpai."

"…"

There was a momentarily delayed to my response but I snorted then laughed.

"Sly as ever I see."

"…"

Isshiki was quiet and made no response to my laughter. As I noticed something's odd, I gazed at her, and when I did she quickly snapped and chuckled.

"But, it almost worked right Senpai?" Isshiki covered her mouth, holding her laughter.

For a moment, I thought she was forcing herself to laugh; perhaps it seems I was wrong. I really can't tell if Isshiki was being honest with herself or not.

Isshiki sighed and quietly muttered something to herself.

"So you never see me as that kind of person, huh?"

I stared at Isshiki who was casted down her gaze, unclear to what she was saying just now.

"Isshiki, are you alri-"

Before I speak out my concern for her, Isshiki stood up and gently adjusted herself and her uniform, brushing off what little dust from her skirt.

She smiled as she noticed my stare.

"Well…lunch break is almost over. So I better g-get back! A president duty is never to slack around y'know. The student council is probably looking for me about now , they're helpless without me and I should be patrolling the school ground as well. Lots and lots of things to do…" her voice pace maybe energetic but she was weary.

She wagged her index finger around thinking it would hide it but her hand was visibly shaking.

Her lips quivered a bit but she forced it staying smile. .

"Isshiki…" I tried asking what was wrong and clearly something was wrong.

"Gotta go Senpai."

Isshiki sticks out her tongue in hopes her playfulness would please me away from my concern for her well-being.

She parted me with a salute before she turned her back on me and immediately went off to the empty hallway on her right.

Half way there I continued staring over her as she continued to walk away increasing her pace then she began running all the sudden with her head lowered and wrapped her arms around herself.

I was daze; I didn't get the chance to ask what's wrong…

Was it my doing? I remained seated on the stairs deeply in thought…then I suddenly came into realization, and quickly gazed at the empty space where she ran off.

 _Did she really mean that?_

* * *

 **Guest- Sorry but I have to deny your request to include Minami. You say Minami will have the most negative opinion, but no…it's the neutral in fact, zero. If you read the LN (not anime) of the sport committee, after the cultural festival she actually took Hachiman's word to heart and when she was appointed as head committee for the sport festival, she tried her best and work harder to redeem herself.**

 **Everytime her clique badmouthing Hachiman, she either joins in (never truly mean it) or stopped them, but if she joins in she always had a gloomy expression indicating she was with guilt.**

 **She hate Hachiman, yes, but she doesn't find the luxury in badmouthing him anymore, and tried to distance herself and not get involved with him again as much as possible.**

 **So that's why I rejected the request to include Minami. She became a minority after 7 volume of LN, explains why she rarely or never appeared in canon and most fanfic here.**

 **If I do include her though, it won't be much interesting and less real.**

* * *

 **No offense though, this is my story and my idea…if I do write a story according to the people's ideas, then it won't be my story and pretty much won't be much of a surprised and interest to the reader as well…it'll be like reading the full plot of a movie from a wiki before watching on the big screen and you already know what to expect.**

* * *

 **I do appreciate the readers for giving me your ideas but I want the readers to read my idea of my story :)**


	16. My teen romantic comedy is wrong p2

**HaroHaro! i appreciate the reviews and PM. Here is part 2. Okay to those who PM me (thanks for the compliment btw) asking me if i'd continue writing a fanfic then the answer is yes. SPOILER! The reason for Yukinoshita's deception will not be revealed even in the final chapter but that's the whole point of my next fanfic i'm currently working on.**

 **Enough thoughts especially the spoiler crucial to the next chapter, or you'll die of anxiety lol. Sorry if there's any misspell or error, i'll try to ninja-correct it? Enjoy reading!**

* * *

 **Chapter 11: My teen romantic comedy is wrong as expected 2/3.**

* * *

Still in skeptic regarding Isshiki. In the end, I never did meet up Yukinoshita during lunch break with Yuigahama because I felt my sense of responsibility lies elsewhere specifically towards Isshiki.

It seems I managed to cheer her up a bit; hopefully she'll loosen her uptight attitude and returned to normal but somehow, a feeling of uncertainty from Isshiki was still surging itself in me.

As for meeting with Yukinoshita, I would meet her later anyway during the group study…assuming she was invited by Totsuka that is, although it's likely, since she's the one tutoring us. Of all people, she just had to be the top student of our school.

Well that being said there's nothing like the smell of excess waste being flushed down the dumps.

Lunch break was almost over; the two people next to me left the restroom loudly overhearing their conversation regarding an anime character that swallows up phantoms. I should catch myself back in watching those sorts of things.

Even so, if my mom caught me watching anime…she will go nuclear. Anime was known for having explicit sexual contents… _and what's wrong with that, mom? I'm already at an allowable age to watch such contents._

I finished rinsing my hands; the room was emptied with everyone already rushing towards to return to their classes. As I looked into the mirror…I noticed there was an occupied toilet door at the corner, and then it instantly unlocked slowly opening the door.

The atmosphere around me started pressurizes and my attention was focused on that single door. If fate was cruel to me like every day of my life…the guy behind the door…would likely be…

"Huh?"

"Uhh…"

We both stared eyes to eyes, both blank and surprised…both me and Hayama froze up, his hand still on the knob while mine were still wet around the sink.

 _Curse you fate!_

"Sup."

"H-Hey."

After our very short brief greetings we resumed back to our activity. I pulled a tissue from the tissue dispenser on the wall and wiped my hands dry; Hayama moved towards the sink next to me and began washing his hands clean.

We both silently went about with our own activity in the restroom.

"You two seem to be on good terms." said Hayama, unknown to his reference.

He gazed at my confused look, and repeated his earlier statement more specific.

"You and Yukinoshita. I saw you both walking."

"What of it?" I asked.

"Hmm. Nothing really. At least one of us still has something…or someone." Hayama laughed wearily.

I sighed in irritation.

"Just because two people walk next to each other, isn't always what it seems." I replied and threw the tissue in the bin.

"So…still not on good terms?" Hayama tilted his head, closing the running tap and pulled a tissue.

"Why should you care? I'm outta here."

"Hikigaya." his deepened voice stopped me before the exit.

"At least answer me this, what are you going to do with your relationship with Yukin-, Yukinoshita?"

"Am I obligated to answer you?"

Hayama continued his persistency to draw some answers for his satisfaction.

"Fair enough, but how about this…you answer me, and I'll try to lift that burden off your back?"

"Burden?"

"The angry mob that's been twinging on you." He specified.

 _Oi oi, now that's just playing dirty…_ but it was a bargain I couldn't afford to push away, besides with the rumors still on my back, anyone seen with me will likely be a target…especially my sister. Words are just as deadly as a blade.

I sigh to my annoyance. "Fine."

"So…what's next between your relationship?" he asked, immediately looking intent on listening.

"What do you mean by the term "relationship"? We never had any sort of relationship to begin with…we were never friends or even more…we're just mere acquaintances in the same club. Used to anyway."

"If we ever…did have one, I should've known better to end it there and now." I added, it seems I might have slipped out more than I intended.

Hayama scoffed at my answer and suddenly burst into laughter. "I see."

 _Shouldn't have fucking answer, knowing you're going to laugh at it in the first place…_

"Sorry..." he apologized, lightly panting after his laughter now trying to regain his composure.

Once he did, his lips curled into somewhat, an eerie smile.

"You're really sad, you know that." He said mockingly, and walked pass me proceeding towards the exit.

As both his gaze and hand laid there on the doorknob, he paused and asked one last question.

"So you're going to end it huh? Why is there a need to do that?" he asked.

"Why shouldn't there be? Considering recent _events_ , don't you think it's the right thing to do?" I mockingly suggested.

In the short distance between us, Hayama's hand clenched tightly on the doorknob. _Is he angry?_

"I hate you Hikigya…" Hayama's voice was trembling in anger.

"You…have everything…and everyone, who genuinely cares about you and what, you're just going to waste all that? You're so selfish." He added, slowly rolling the doorknob.

I silently stared his back while he continued rambling. I didn't have any luxury to argue with him.

As the trembling hand holding the doorknob stopped shaking, Hayama let out a chuckle, and then mutter, "The right thing to do huh?"

He quickly shot his gaze back at me with grim hard look.

"That's what's wrong with you, Hikigaya." his response pierced through my fabric being causing me to flinch.

 _Why did I flinch? Out of all the words he spoken…why did that phrase alone fazed me?_

Hayama left before I ask what he meant. There wasn't any point to chase him for answers, I would only make myself look pathetic and boost his ego and arrogance.

"Tch."

 _As if I need to be lectured from someone like him. Someone who'd rather have an empty unreal safe relationship that goes on and on forever like there's no time at all. I'd rather end it, because at least it ended real and gen-…_

My fist instinctively clenched itself briefly before it loosen up again.

Maybe, Hayama's intention was never Yukinoshita but it was something in her.

Yukinoshita's sincerity, truth and authentic, never bound to any superficiality and wore facades…despite what she did.

If our position exchange, if Hayama was me, people wouldn't put up an image or be nice to him…but rather than being miserable he would likely be happier with that circumstane.

I can't say I blame him, many would consider a dream to be someone like Hayama, but in reality…it was actually the opposite.

He may have many people around him…but how many of those people are genuine with him?

The answer was to none. They all put up facades and an act for his acceptance.

Miura was none of those people, at first I thought she was but then back during the marathon, she showed a side of her whom I thought she never had…it was a side that display her raw sincerity and cherishment of Hayama's importance to her…but in the end Hayama ignorantly decided to push her away anyway. He was a fool not noticing Miura was always there and would go to great length to be with him.

Wasted.

I almost feel pity for the guy, heh. _Well that's the big flaw in being popular._

I guess he must've given up, and never look anyone in his circle differently. To his eyes, everyone was just the same, they're all blending in. When putting it that away, I realized we're both not that different at all… except he's given up but what about me?

Why did Hayama imply it was wrong for me to end when it's the right thing to do?

 _The right thing to do…_

I exited the restroom, placing my hands in my trouser and started walking back to my class.

 _Is something generally right considered what I want? Or…_

 _What I want, considered right?_

I never once for myself doubted, stop to think or consider

 _What is right?_

This entire time, I was always assuming what's right or wrong by following people's judgement and opinion.

How it was right to stabilize Hayama's relationship with his cliques but was wrong to Yukinoshita and Yuigahama.

The only time I call the shot of what's right or wrong was when Yuigahama propose to remain a frozen relationship for the three of us, but I voice out it was wrong merely because she can't and has no right to decide such thing for someone.

I deny such notion because it's wrong or to be precise it's because it's not what I wanted.

We all have what we want, our own idea of justice and it's wrong to give it to someone to decide it for us because we have to individually decide it for ourselves on our own.

Also because what I want…

In life we make mistakes to learn what went wrong to right it.

But,

To grasp what ones heart desire, does everything have to be necessarily right?

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

The bell rang throughout the school, ending our homeroom. Everyone in the class packed their stuff and rushed off to either attending their club activity or left school to go home. I on the other hand was schedule to join Totsuka's group study.

So the group study will be consisting of the usual suspect.

Yukinoshita of course, will be there tutoring us. Hooray…

Yuigahama, no doubt will be there with a will of fire to study her best.

There's Zaimokuza which I highly doubt he would stay awake in front of a book for more than eight seconds.

Then there's Kawa-… and of course Totsuka.

After finished debriefing through my thoughts, I looked around from my seat for Totsuka to ask if he wanted to walk together or…

…apparently, he's not in the class anymore. Wherever he went off must be important, but I'm sure he'll be joining the group study. I'd be disappointed if he doesn't but what can I do I can never get mad around him…

Before I stood, I quickly got back down to my seat by reflex when Miura appeared standing in front of me all the sudden, fiddling with her curls. I was completely taken aback, not just suddenly showed up in front of me but also with that frightful look in her eyes.

I let out a breath collecting myself and asked her presence.

"Yeah?"

"English." She said.

"Huh?" I was in confusion; does she want me to speak in English?

Miura let out a sigh in annoyance.

"You dense or what? Sensei told us to partner up with anyone we choose, and I choose you." Her voice lashed out sharply in a quick manner but her statement, stunned me into a momentarily silence.

"Huh?" I repeated.

Miura clicked her tongue and gritted her teeth.

"Are you deaf now!?" Miura with a temper yelled at me.

I understood what she's saying, but I was just making sure if she's sure of herself but once I confirmed that she's confidently positive and absolute with her decision, I can't helped but let out a sheepishly chuckle.

"Out of all the people here, you want to partner up with the schools most hated?" My lips trembled, holding in my laughter.

Miura smirked at me and her face slowly closed in front of my face. _Too close…_

Her eyes were now aligning to mine, staring deeply as she mumbled a spine shivering response that took away my slowly fading laughter in my mouth completely.

"Then it's my problem, not yours and if they got a problem, they'll deal with me."

 _Ho, scary!_

Somewhere in her eyes, there's no mistaken it… it was a look with the intent to kill!

A swirl of nervousness and cold sweat washed plainly upon my face, I swallowed and nodded in acceptance to her partnership with me.

Miura broadly grinned to my decision and pulled herself away.

"Good. I'll contact you for…stuff." Said Miura, then turned her back on me and walked off.

"Contact?" I asked, stopping her tracks and she returned gazing at me with a response.

"Oh, Yui gave me your number. So yeah. See ya."

 _Why that bitch! Handing out my number like a handout!_

Once Miura left, I grabbed my bag and headed out to the library but before I do that, I was making a quick stop to the class next door, class 3-F, to make sure of something.

I took a peek of the classroom from outside, there was still some student lingering around on their desks but Yuigahama was nowhere at sight, so that means it's a green to go to the library.

The hallway was almost deserted unlike this morning, making my journey smooth, able myself to walk freely without taking precaution of my surrounding from any furious Hayato Hayama fan club.

Once I arrived in the library front door, I checked the time of my phone.

 _Okay. I'm ten minutes late…so everyone should be present about now._

I headed in the library, and thankfully it just as deserted as the hallway. As I went deeper inside my eyes found Yukinoshita sitting next to the window at the large table in the midst of numerous bookshelves, probably saving the seat for the group…but there was a slight problem.

…She was alone and…I've arrived first. _Shit…this isn't how it's supposed to be._

If I headed there now, things would really be awkward. Should I leave until the others arrive? Well, Yukinoshita haven't seen me yet, she's busy reading the book on the table.

I took a step back to cease my chance to sneak out, but then the floor made a creaking noise, loud enough for it to caught the attention of Yukinoshita and saw me standing nervously.

 _Crap…_

"Yo."

"Good afternoon."

 _So much for sneaking out stealthily._ I sat myself down on the opposite of where Yukinoshita was sitting, her eyes returned to her book once more, tracing her eyes accordingly to the contents of the book.

Times like these, I wish the library wasn't deserted…

 _And where the hell are those guys!? Are they busy?_

How awfully strange that I was the first one to arrive consider it was already ten minutes past the appointed time, I should be the late one, hell I stayed in class deliberately stalling myself to avoid ended up in this exact situation.

Suddenly I realized Yukinoshita's been coughing since I arrived. She covered her mouth letting out another cough and cleared up her throat. I can't tell whether she coughed in response to the awkwardness or there was simply just wrong with her…

"You okay?" I asked, awkwardly.

"Uh, yes. It's nothing. Just a dry throat." She replied while her eyes were still on her book.

 _The only people who has dry throat are the talky ones, and highly doubt Yukinoshita is talkative in class._

"Do you have anything to drink with you?" I asked in concern, simply because it was instinct.

"May I remind you drinks and foods are prohibited in the library." She answered in reflex to my concern.

Not the kind of response I was looking for.

 _Sheesh, I was only worrying about you…guess I was wrong to even feel that way._

"Jeez, I was asking…if you don't, I can fetch you one. You didn't have to say it like that though." I was slightly annoyed with the unforeseen response.

Yukinoshita quickly shot her gaze with a surprised look.

"I didn-…I mean…Sorry…" Yukinoshita frowned and let out a contented sigh; she looked down to her book but wasn't reading it anymore. She now had the same look of guilt as this morning.

As much as her response annoyed the hell out of me, it was something I'm used to already…back then she took our spat for granted, merely as a game of words to her…but now...

She was in a pitiful state, apologizing more often which was far more annoying.

I groaned and sigh, standing up from my seat.

"Come on." I gestured her to do the same.

She made a dubious look between me and her things on the table.

"Just leave it, don't worry." I said. _I'm confident no one's going to steal your stuff, that's what librarians are here for. Witnesses._

Hesitant at first, she stood up and catching up next to me as we left the library and our things behind.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

We left to get ourselves a drink while killing time so the other's arrived to the library.

We went to the nearest vending machine at the school. Yukinoshita purchased herself a mineral water while I, purchased my usual. MAX COFFEE BABY!

We leaned ourselves against the wall next to the vending machine, opening our drinks and enjoyed the breeze and atmosphere of the school in the afternoon.

A small smile spread across my lips as I sip through my coffee. Yukinoshita reacted furrowing her eyebrows and gave me a mildly odd look.

Now that I think about it, I never once drink MAX COFFEE for the last five days of my suspension. No wonder something felt missing, _but oh man, this is very relieving!_

I felt the presence of Yukinoshita's stare next to me. She was drinking and stared at me at the same time.

"How are you holding up?" I asked, seeking any kind of distraction from this stiff atmosphere.

Yukinoshita, made a confusing look to my question.

"Your dad. I remembered he wanted to see you and Haruno so I wond-…never mind." I stopped myself from prying into someone else's business, it was foolish.

Yukinoshita gave me a reassuring smile and shook her head.

"It's fine, Hikigaya-kun. You're pretty much involved …so I don't mind." She replied.

"Oh, right. I see."

Yukinoshita stared away to the sky while her fingers were fiddling on the curves of the bottle she was holding.

"We went to our father, the first thing he did was apologize and also on behalf of mother. Mother was there too…surprisingly, she apologized as well…but Father claimed he was fully to blame for what happened."

A pregnant pause before she resumed. I had a long side-stare at her, listening to her.

"He made a proposal that every weekend, we'll be having a family therapy session…so that, we may have a chance to opened ourselves up…closing our distances…and eventually, we can be a real family." Yukinoshita's smile widened and the joy in her voice continued blooming.

I was surprised and relieve to hear this news.

"Me and nee-san didn't expect this from our family, to make an effort to arrange this just for us…so we decided to give it a try starting next week." She gazed at me with her unwavering and unwither smile that continued radiating throughout this discussion.

I can tell by how she looked and sounded as she explained the whole time that she was indeed, for the first time, this maybe the first time I was confidently sure and convinced that Yukino Yukinoshita was pretty much visibly engulfed in happiness.

"That's good…to hear." I couldn't think of a better way to phrase my relief other than that sentence alone. I was glad for her of course.

The rapid change from sorrow to joy was much needed as I allowed a thin smile at her. Yukinoshita surprised, a deep small breath escaping her as a more serene smile appeared in response to mine.

Yukinoshita shifted her gaze to the floor, pondering in silence while her smile remained undiminished. She then returned her sights to me.

"I've been meaning…to…thank you. Hikigaya-kun."

"Me? I didn't do anything. I was pretty much getting own remember?" That sounded even more pathetic out loud.

"Hikigaya-kun…" her sternly voice pulled my gaze.

"When will you ever acknowledge your doing? You acknowledge your weakness but never your strength…." Yukinoshita chuckled briefly.

 _The only time I ever acknowledge myself is when I did something wrong. heh._

Yukinoshita chewed her lower lip, indicating that she was trying to phrase her words very precisely.

"You changed people Hikigaya. Despite your rotten appearance, you touched their lives, changing their perspective to the better, just…as you have…changed mine." Yukinoshita blushed at her own statement of me, and absently moving a strand of her hair away gently from her shoulder before continuing on.

"I guess that's literally never judge a book by its cover. Even so…if it wasn't for you…"

My eyebrows twitched.

"Truthfully, I never expected for you to come. I never hope things would work out because I thought there are somethings that we can't change…but I guess I was wrong. It's all thanks to you…"

My hand that was currently holding my drink slowly tightened each second slightly crushing it. The wave of joy slowly subsides from me.

My mouth distorted and quickly disrupted the soothing atmosphere radiating from Yukinoshita.

"Glad to be _useful_ then…" I growled quietly yet audibly enough for her to notice.

Yukinoshita flinched in confusion.

"Hikigaya-kun, What are you-…"

"What happens then? Huh? What happens now?" I muttered weakly, gazing down.

Hesitation and worry contorted Yukinoshita's movement. "Hikigaya-kun…that's not what I-, If it's something to do with-"

"I don't care about that." I shot a glare at her, narrowing my eyes and pressed my lips tightly before loosening it for it to open with a question I've been dying to ask her.

"What I give a damn about is…you had a choice between telling me the truth and lie to me. You chose to lie. Why?" I asked firmly in mixed with both anger and anxiety.

Yukinoshita was hesitating and her eyes alternately averted from my gaze. She slowly brought her right hand to her left arm, clutching it. Her pleading eyes turned upwards towards me.

"Hikigaya-kun can we not do this now..."

I gritted my teeth and burst more emotionally in frustration than I intend to.

"No! Quit stalling! "My unintended choice of tone startled Yukinoshita, she wrapped her arms around herself and looked spook.

I panted heavily then flinched as I saw the fear in Yukinoshita's moist eyes and came upon realization of my own action and what I blurted out.

I slowly turned myself around, facing the wall and leaning both my arms against it, supporting the sudden heaviness of my body to stand. I rested my head on my arms feeling unsettled for my impulsive act.

Yukinoshita's steps slowly and carefully approached me.

"Hikigaya-kun are…you okay?" I felt Yukinoshita's hand trying to reach to me but I stopped her from proceeding closer to me.

"Go…Yukinoshita. Just..go." I mumbled weakly to her.

Yukinoshita's footsteps slowly retreated away, getting fainter and fainter, leaving me with a whisper. "I'm sorry."

I smirked at myself with a thought, that 'I'm sorry' had seemingly became a catchphrase to Yukinoshita. _If sorry is the only thing you can say…then you're no better than a broken record._

 _Still_

I immediately slammed my right palm against the wall angrily.

 _I already had a chance to talk out with her, why did I act so impulsively!?_

I slammed the wall once more

 _So fucking frustrating! I could've ended it if it wasn't for stupid ol'Hachiman._ I thought once things had settle, once the complex of my feelings regarding Yukinoshita came to light and the root of all problems was solved…I thought I wouldn't reduce myself to this anymore.

 _If so, then what is this blind frustration? What is it!?_

I continuously slammed the wall with my palm, the anger and humiliation I was feeling had taken much of the pain that seared though my hand.

I stopped slamming once I noticed the bleed from the small cuts and how bruise my hand was. I panted…leaning my temple against the wall.

 _Or maybe, because it was deliberate…_ maybe because there was some part in me that doesn't wanted things to end between me and her.

 _Then again…my thoughts and frustration point towards ending it…_

"Hachiman?"

I lifted head from the wall, and gazed towards the surprisingly familiar voice.

"T-Totsuka?"

We both stared blankly in silence, both our mouth agape. As he moved his eyes lower, he suddenly gasped upon noticing something in particular.

"Oh m-…Y-Your hand!"

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

After Totsuka confirmed my hand's condition, he quickly brought me to the infirmary to treat the cuts, bruise and wounds of my hand.

Totsuka was currently… _HOLDING MY HAND! HE'S HOLDING MY HAND!_

…Just to spray an anti-bacterial spray on the open wound of my hand to prevent further infection, once he's over that, he started wrapping the bandage around my hand.

"There, that should do it." Totsuka rubbed what little sweat off his forehead after finished wrapping up my hand with bandage. "Try not to exert it a bit okay?" he advised.

"Thank you for your care." I said and thoroughly inspected my hand; it was well treated and well bandaged.

My eyes were fixated on Totsuka as he returned back the treatment item to the cabinet.

"Hachiman." Totsuka called out while still arranging the items back to the cabinet.

"Yeah?"

"How…How are you and Yukinoshita-san doing?"

I startled when he brought up the subject. I tried my best not to stutter upon my response to him.

"W-Well…we're fine, if that's what you meant."

"Is that so? Hmm…I saw Yukinoshita walking away from where you were before I ran into you…and she seems…upset."

"I wonder…" Attempted to act oblivious around the matter, Totsuka immediately gave me a sulking stare with a puffed up cheeks.

"Mmm…Hachiman."

…I tried averting his stare but his looks keeps pulling me back to stare. As I couldn't avoid his stare, I gave away.

"We had a quarrel…" I rubbed the back of my neck and looked away from him.

"Is that it?" Totsuka giggled.

"You really didn't have to hide it." Totsuka smiled, and I sigh in relieve that he wasn't mad.

"Yeah…sorry…"

Totsuka shook his head gently.

"It's fine. What's it about?"

I flinched as I did not expect Totsuka to take interest and ask. Normally, under such circumstance one would have to be considerate and avoid asking that would invoke one to be sensitive at a sensitive matter…I wasn't sensitive though, but I just didn't expect Totsuka to be…inconsiderate?

 _No that's not it._

He wasn't being inconsiderate, he's probably thinking that we're close enough to share sensitive information regarding ourselves and I completely agree that we're indeed…close. Absolutely close!

 _Let's see how should I say it…_

"It's…umm, complicated." My eyes looked away from Totsuka.

"Is it…love complicated?" I startled and quickly submerged in silence. Totsuka gasped as he noticed my reaction and took it as a yes.

He happily clapped his hands and laughed joyfully.

"Aha, I always knew there was more going on with you two!" he repeatedly clapped his hand, applauding himself eagerly with an enthusiasm laugh akin to a girlish glee.

I shouldn't have shown that kind of reaction, but Totsuka continued giggling, his youthful glee almost uncontainable as he jumped in placed and danced.

 _So cute! So WORTH IT!_

"But…hmm…" As Totsuka calmed down from his excitement, he seated himself in front of me with a hard confused look.

"What about Hayato then?"

 _Oh, he doesn't know? So I guess Yuigahama only shared this matter with Isshiki alone._

"Uh…well like I said, it's complicated." I smiled wearily and forced a dry laugh, slowly looking away once more.

Totsuka nodded "Well in any case, I'm envy of you."

"Me? I mean…what is there to envy about?"

 _Seriously, what is there to envy about me?_

"You have someone who really, really likes you." Totsuka chuckled and gently give a pat on my right lap.

"Well…" Hearing that from him, I feel myself blushed and lowered my head out of embarrassment.

"Even Yuigahama-san." I quickly gazed at him as he brought up that name.

"Huh?"

"It's very obvious. Yuigahama-san has that same look as Yukinoshita-san whenever she looked at you …" Totsuka held his chin, giving an analysis look.

"Honestly, I wasn't sure if she does at first though, but after confirming between you and Yukinoshita-san…I have no room for doubt anymore that Yuigahama-san might also feel the same way as Yukino shita-san feel towards you."

I may not admit it out loud, but there wasn't a room to doubt his explanation was indeed correct.

I was astounded; I never expected and thought Totsuka to be the observant, perceptive type.

Someone immediately popped into my mind.

"Ishikki?" I muttered.

"Isshiki-san?" Totsuka gave a brief silence to think with a thoughtful look.

Isshiki, may have said it was just a one of her usual remarks to tease me, but how do I know if she just agreed to it because I was ignorantly hurting her by being ignorant of her?

She made so many sly remarks towards me that I may have consciously gotten used to it, and quickly presume and mistook any truth from her mouth as one of her teasing remarks without any consideration, or a thought or two . I literally took her feelings for granted. How do I know whether she was telling the truth, that she…

"I don't know…I rarely see you guys together enough to consider. So…" Totsuka giggled with a wearily look.

 _Well Totsuka was never around whenever I'm with Isshiki and vice versa._

"No idea. Sorry."

I chuckled and smile at myself. _When did my life ended up becoming such a romantic comedy?_

"It must be nice…to have someone who really likes you."

As I looked over to him, Totsuka had his smile fixed on me.

"Trust me, it's a complete nightmare." I concluded out loud.

How ironic though, back then I always wanted a female partner of my own and I constantly got rejected following an insult. _As if a rejection wasn't insulting enough…_

"Still…I'd like to experience it…" Totsuka murmured.

 _Wait…what…_

"Wha…really? Are you serious?" I was bewildered as this was so unexpected of him, I never imagined Totsuka to have any attraction to his opposite gender.

Totsuka quirked his eyebrow.

"Why so surprised?" His question caught me off guard and I stuttered trying to answer him.

"Well, it's umm…n-nothing. Just..you don't-"

"Look the type?" Totsuka narrowed his eyes on me with a suspiciously look, _is he angry? Is that how he looks when he's angry? Shit.._

I panicked, and carefully tried finding a reassuring response to answer him without setting off the landmine.

"No, that's not what-"

He instantly burst into laughing.

"It's okay Hachiman. Don't worry; it's actually a common response." Totsuka waved his hands, telling it wasn't a big deal.

That was relieving to hear, I released my nervousness through a sigh; I thought for sure I was pissing him off.

 _Wait…hold on, common?_ I shot back at Totsuka curiously.

"Yes?"

I began dwelling my thoughts and speculations on Totsuka.

If I wasn't really the first person to give off that kind of impression about Totsuka, then there were others…but to be honestly give an impression, one have to went through a certain circumstance, a very brave but stupid and critical move to the point they blurt out their honesty be it kind or cruel…for example, a confession.

Does that mean…

"Totsuka…have you ever…confessed to someone?" I asked reluctantly, hoping my question wouldn't be either sensitive or awkward for Totsuka to answer.

"Huh? Yup!" Totsuka answered nonchalantly with a knowing smile.

 _I knew it…_

"And you got rejected huh? Because… people never see you as that…type?" I stuttered slightly, carefully phrasing it.

"Yup!"

He was still smiling happily even remembering such tragic event; I raise an eyebrow with a confused look etched on my face.

 _How is he still smiling?_

"Aren't you sad about it?" I asked out of concern and confusion.

"Well…yeah, I was disappointed at first…" he casted his eyes down from me for a moment, but then returned gazing at me with a confidently assuring smile.

"But…I'm glad they were honest with me."

 _That's just like you Totsuka, always see the brighter side of things, never letting any pain like mere rejection tear you down!_

A smile slowly tugged on the corner of my lips.

"I really admire you Totsuka." I said gently, barely above a whisper.

"Huh?" Totsuka flustered, his cheeks were glowing red. He then tried laughing it off wryly and smiled.

"T-Thanks, I guess."

The room quickly submerged in a momentarily silence. He looked too embarrassed to continue the charade of a conversation that his eyes were swimming all over the room to catch any kind of distraction to dissolve his embarrassment.

Totsuka then looked like he realizes something.

"Anyway, let's finish up and head to the library."

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

It was still the early afternoon, not much time had passed since me and Yukinoshita took a walk and my time with Totsuka in the infirmary.

Totsuka and I have been walking in a comfort silence. He informed me he was having a short practice session with his tennis club mates after homeroom ended and before running into me.

As we arrived and enter the library, the place wasn't that different than before I arrived here earlier, by that I meant it was still…well there are people so it's not as empty as before but it's not crowded to the point where you're suffocating by the lack of space, otherwise I wouldn't be here and so as the girl who was bad with crowds, specifically named Yukino Yukinoshita.

Murmurs were heard from the direction of the table me and Yukinoshita was saving for the group, especially the voice overlapping all that's currently in the middle of teaching the basics in cumulative frequency curve, Yukinoshita.

As we slowly approached the table, we saw…as suspected, Zaimokuza right side of Yuigahama, face first snoring on his book while Kawa-…saki? Who was sitting on the left side of Yukinoshita was writing something according to what Yukinoshita was teaching. Yuigahama, sitting in front of the opposite side of Yukinoshita, was focusing on Yukinoshita's soft voice lecturing the mysterious wonders of mathematic.

"Hey guys, sorry we're late." Totsuka made a wave of his hand as a form greeting, and proceeded in taking his seat next on the right of Zaimokuza.

As I walked around the table towards my seat, Yuigahama turned her head to make a considerate response upon me and Totsuka's late arrival.

"Ah that's okay we were just- UWAAAHHH! HIKKI WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAND!?" Yuigahama's sudden overreacted exclaiming burst startled everyone on the table, waking up Zaimokuza in the process, including attracting the attentions of the few fellow students who were currently present in the library.

"Yuigahama-san." Yukinoshita's low but cold piercing voice silenced Yuigahama.

Yuigahama got carried away and quickly covered her mouth with her palms, apologizing quietly for her outburst.

"Sorry."

"It's not bad as it looks." I replied. _Totsuka should've bandaged my hand simpler. It kind of makes it look like I broke my hand._

"Geez, what happen this time? Don't tell me you punch the guy again." Kawasaki's hypothesis caused Yuigahama to quickly stand from her seat in protest against her statement.

"Hikki would never do that again!" Yuigahama speaks out, declaring her confidence and faith in me…but she slowly turned her head to me…with a doubtful look.

"Would you?" Yuigahama mumbled her doubt. _Hey hey! Where did your faith fly off to!?_

Totsuka as a witness, tried to attempt to stir away the doubts and idea of me being a delinquent from their minds, as all their eyes were staring and waiting for an answer.

"Well…Hachiman…umm…" Totsuka gave me a look telling me to answer them and so I did.

"I fell down the stairs."

My pathetic false cause of injury made them at a loss of words as they all quickly went dead quiet with no further response, comments or question. I can't really tell if they accept it, or simply thought how pathetic I was.

I continued taking my seat on the left of Kawasaki. I glanced at Kawasaki who may have asked, but didn't look a bit concern for me nor did she show any outward reaction to my injury…not that I'm expecting some from her.

"Totsuka, can you hand me that bag?" I whispered, pointing at my school bag where I left it.

Totsuka nodded and pass my bag.

I inspected the inside of my bag, and my things remained intact. I began rummaging through it to taking out my books and overdue homework. While I was, I could feel the strong presence of stares from the corner of the table.

Then a shivering eerie voice pulled my attention.

"Muuu..." _Oh boy..._

"How pathetic to rush yourself to the battlefield just to end up wounding yourself." Zaimokuza annoyingly huffed and folded his arms across his chest in a flamboyant display of emotion.

I sighed in annoyance and looked for words to shut him up.

"Go back to sleep or better yet if you're planning to stay awak-…never mind, you're always asleep even in conscious."

"Indeed Hachiman. We are simply trapped in an unbreakable illusion, projecting our desire to pleased us…but I will not give into such temptations therefore we must work together to break free!"

 _Temptations? I don't want even want to know what he means by that._

Zaimokuza yelled out and again, letting his chuunibyou behavior took action of his body as he stood up with one feet stomp on top of his chair, raising a fist mid-air completing his ridiculous posture of display which caught everyone's attention on our table right now.

"Fear not, for I shall free you all!" Zaimokuza shout deluded declaration aloud and repeatedly murmured his curses to the air.

 _Oh man we're in the library_ … _This guy just has no boundaries!_

"Oi you, be quiet and sit down!" Kawasaki chided and had a glare focusing on Zaimokuza.

"Huuuuh?" Zaimokuza turned his head around to Kawasaki responding the same look.

Strange, usually Zaimokuza turn tail from his opposite gender but not Kawasaki. There's a strange thought. Maybe he never looked at her as a girl, I never do sometimes unless I reminded myself the image of the black lace.

Both stared and glared at each other down in static and silence, while we witnesses on the table were witnessing quietly, Totsuka had a troubled smile while Yuigahama looked like she was trying to hide herself from the embarrassment and the stares focusing at our table, Yukinoshita didn't look so much concern and remain calmed and collected.

Something tells me that we both know the outcome.

"Mu…Mu…Muuuhahahaha! The likes of you have no defiance over m-"

"Be quiet you, or I'll make you be quiet." Kawasaki's vigorous threat caused Zaimokuza to sweat coldly around the forehead, but…

For some reason he immediately broke into laughter. The wonders of his mind. Yup, he's losing it.

"Mwahahaha! Your words amused me, for that I shall-"

"Sit…down."

"Yes ma'am." Zaimokuza nodded, obediently complied quietly like a dog being put back to its leash.

Everyone on the table then resumed back to what they're doing, studying.

I sighed, and went ahead looking through all my compiled overdue homework. Luckily the sensei was kind enough to extend the dateline until next Monday; majority of the homework was modern Japanese. _I'm starting to get the impression that the sensei doesn't like me_ _that much._ Well I did write and I quote 'A twisted essay' as he said. At least this was better than getting punched in the gut by Hiratsuka-sensei during my second year.

Oh well, I might as well take it easy for now, there's plenty of time for me to do.

The library once again became peaceful. The sunlight continued to gleam throughout the windows of the library from the partial cloudy sky and, the chattering and activities within inside and outside the library of the spring's afternoon filled the silence of the library.

I glance at Yukinoshita, her expression composed and her mouth still moving on the presence of both Kawasaki and Yuigahama's attentions, attending to every piece of knowledge leaving from her mouth.

Zaimokuza who was sitting straight and had his arms remained folded looking like he was attending to the lecture as well, but in truth behind those glasses he was actually asleep. I may have been the only one noticing this right now or perhaps everyone did but ignored him. _Well he's better off snoring his ass._

Sitting in front of the opposite of me, Totsuka deeply in focus on the papers spreading about on his area of the table, while poking his left cheek with his pen.

The tranquil silence remained hanging over us, I stretched my arms and a small smile fixed itself on my mouth upon this comfort. It's my first day being back in school and I already have plenty of things overloading my head. Some things never change.

As I stretched out my arms, I flinch by the small strain of pain suddenly made its presence felt reminding me my hand was still in bandage. I guess I shouldn't have overdone it.

My eyes instinctively linger around and then were met with a side-glance from the glistening blue eyes of Yukinoshita who should've been tending to her two temporary students. We both stared briefly in surprised before abruptly turning our eyes away.

There was a stiff awkwardness before an earnest voice dissolved it, pulling me to look at him.

"Hachiman."

"Hmm?" I stared at Totsuka, quietly waited.

"Can you help me here?"

"Uh..sure. What do you want me to help with? " I leaned myself closer, my arms spreading on the table as I give him my full attention.

"List out any words you can come up with, so I can write it's opposite." Totsuka readied his pen on his book.

 _Antonym? Easy enough._

"Okay then…"

"It's part of an English assignment." _Crap, English huuuh?_

Seems like I was about to face his disappointment. A disappointment from Totsuka is much more devastating compared to any apocalypse disaster movie. I'd rather face my mom's bare eyes directly than facing his disappointment.

"I'm not really good with English…" I admitted, cracking a distorted smile and slightly look away.

Totsuka chuckled, expressing a smile as he and gave an encouraging response.

"It's okay, just give me the words you can come up with and I'll rewrite it in English. Okay?" Just when I was disappointed at myself, nevertheless, Totsuka managed to find a way to drift away my inferiority.

I smiled and nod at him.

"Okay."

 _Hmm… what should I give him…_

My eyes were all over place with my thoughts seeking for the words to give him, slowly…my eyes fixed on Yukinoshita. Her posture remains perfect, even from here her beauty was unavoidable. The lips that…

Something from back then flashed in my mind all the sudden… I averted my eyes from Yukinoshita, and resume the task I was given.

"Cold."

Totsuka nodded. "…and its opposite, hot."

As Totsuka finished writing the antonym of the word given from me, he gazed and waited for the next.

"Soft."

"Rough. Next."

"Beautiful…"

"Umm…ugly…hey uh..."

"White."

"Black…hey Hachiman." I stopped and lift my gaze to him.

"Hmm?"

"Sorry but can you give me something challenging? I mean even kindergartener can answer some of your words. No offence." Totsuka gave a brief wryly laugh. _He does have a point there…challenging huh?_

Totsuka his eyes focused at me, waiting for the next word to shoot from my mouth. I laid my chin on my hand, and glance again towards the girl who was currently clearing up Yuigahama's confusion on her working equation.

 _Hmm…_

As something came to mind, I slowly opened my mouth giving him the next word.

"Genuine." I let out a deep breath for unknown reason and stared boringly at my book below me.

"Genuine, huh? Hmm…hmm…" I shifted my gaze to Totsuka, concerned of his murmuring in search for its opposite word.

"Too hard?" I asked.

Totsuka stared back at me, and smiled wearily.

"Yeah…I guess, but all the more reason to find and learn it right?" Totsuka's smile was fixed on his face as he began rummaging through his school bag seemingly searching for something.

"Ah here it is."

 _A dictionary?_

He began flipping the pages carefully speedreading the contents of each page to find its antonym.

"Let's see…ge…gen…genu…" Totsuka repeatedly muttered while his eyes slowly scanning through the contents of that section.

"Ah! Here genuine and its antonym is…Bogus."

 _Bogus huh?_

"Thanks Hachiman." Totsuka showed his gratitude towards my assist and I nodded at him, returning my gaze to my book. Slowly, my thoughts wander off again.

 _Bogus…an ugly word fitting for its ugly definition…_

Despite Yukinoshita's deception, she was none of those things. She had her reason, everyone does… but that wasn't the issue.

My mom gave me a decision to end things with Yukinoshita. She knows me better than I do myself. I was told I was a kind boy by my mom, perhaps that's what's wrong.

There's a saying…'kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.' But what of its contributor? The people who contributes those kindness?

They…or we, ourselves, our kindness caused us to be too blind and deaf to see any faults and hidden agendas. The option of being a loner or let myself be blind and deaf forever was open…and I chose the first option.

People like us, existed to be used with no resistance because we want to fit or perhaps we were looking for something but sadly we didn't linger long enough to find it since a tool will eventually be discarded once it has no further use.

For that sole reason I became desperate, every turn, every interaction always there will always be a motive…whether we're used as a scapegoat, a sacrifice, there will always be a motive in social interactions that involves one of us to be the victim sooner or later.

It was a battle of the fittest an animal kingdom, but in society it was a battle of the most favorable, in terms of appearance or usefulness.

Because of that, I'd rather be a loner and spare myself from any emotional breakdown from the people I used to think as someone as something in my life but turned out to be nothing but false and empty,

Nothing but bogus.

For once in my life, I wish there were no ulterior motive, no hidden agenda, and no reason.

I was desperate for

Something bitter yet real.

Not simple but complex yet worth it in the end.

But…

Does such thing even exist anymore?

Is this what Haruno meant? She once told me she believed such genuine do exist, but for some reason she questioned at times if it does or doesn't…right now because of her sister, she hope it does whereas Hayama had given up such belief and ideals.

Once, I had hoped that one day, I would see it in my with my own eyes, fulfilling the emptiness in me that's been missing for what felt like an eternity, clawing my way through every painful experience and choice in life to grasp the intangible.

The longer I experience it, the more disappointed I am with myself for being a fool to think there ever was such a thing in this cruel world.

No matter where I turn or who I'm with…nothing seems to ever change…

Even now…even with these wonderful people around me…I thought for the first time in my empty and miserable life…

I was close…

I thought I was…

But it seems…I returned being too blind and too deaf to even realize, again.

 _My thoughts of genuine is nothing but an unbreakable illusion._

* * *

 **Hikigaya- it wasn't arrogance though, i was merely clarifying something up but if some felt hurt than i do apologize.**

* * *

 **Okay there we have part 2 of 3...next chapter is... 3 of 3!**


	17. My teen romantic comedy is wrong p3

**Right, where should i start? well, firstly apologize for the late update because I've been busy with moving here and there so yeah.**

 **Secondly, i would like to thank all my followers/Readers for keeping up with my fanfic, thank you for your undying support. You have my undying gratitude.**

 **Lastly, Enjoy reading this finale. if you think this is the end then its true...this is truly its ending, but there's something by the end of this chapter.**

 **Enjoy reading, and sorry for the error. i'll try to re-proof read it again and ninja correct it.**

* * *

 **My teen romantic comedy is wrong as expected (Finale)**

* * *

It's already been around forty-five minutes past two in the afternoon. Keeping track of the time was always been a habit of mine. Not sure why, maybe it had something to do with what Zaimokuza once mention. There are people who were watching us, reading us, except they're not of this world, he said. _Hold on! Am I really giving thoughts about that guy!?_

Our group study was still commencing. Yuigahama learned from her mistakes and her studies improved little by little. Kawasaki, however, looked like she wasn't even trying but since there had been no interjection from Yukinoshita, nor question from herself; I assume she handled herself quite well.

Zaimokuza was sleeping soundly on his arms on the table. Totsuka had gone to the restroom for a bit.

While I on the other hand, surprisingly was attempting on my homework since I've got nothing better to do, plus I've already had five days of slacking…apparently not so much. For some reason, there was a need for improvement in my life. If my social life was slowly in shamble, the least I could do was to improve my studies so my life wouldn't be fully worthless.

As my focus was mainly on my homework in front of me, I can hear the murmured voices of Yukinoshita and Kawasaki.

"Kawasaki-san, can we switch? So it may be convenient for me to-"

"Ah I get it, um okay." Kawasaki understood what Yukinoshita meant, whatever it was.

Then I noticed the chairs pulled out, I glance and both switched seats. _Wait; hold on…what are you…_

Yukinoshita, now seated closely next to me while Kawasaki seated in front of Yuigahama.

"Umm…" I tried asking but Yukinoshita quickly interject.

"Don't get any ideas…I switched seats because it would be convenient for me check up on everyone's work from this position and so that I wouldn't have to raise my voice to answer from here to there."

Fair point, but still…you didn't have any problem or complaints doing it back then. Now I'm starting to get ideas over here.

Yukinoshita switched her gaze to the big snorlax in front of the opposite of her. She stared briefly at Zaimokuza then placed her hand on her temple suppressing a headache.

I ignored her, and continued doing my homework. Let's see now…

"Do you have any questions?" Yukinoshita asked breaking my train of thoughts.

"Trust me. You'll be the first one to know if I do." I answered without of concern nor care.

"Very well." While Yukinoshita waited for any help needed, she continued reading her usual book. _Isn't that a bit harsh? I know you're smart but you could at least pretend to study like us…but I don't think anyone had a problem with that so far._

"Umm Yukinoshita." Kawasaki called to Yukinoshita seemingly has a question. Yukinoshita gazed at the papers Kawasaki handed her and began explaining and answering every question Kawasaki threw at her.

By the time I returned my attention to my homework, Totsuka returned walking in the library and seated in front of the opposite of me. As I glance at him, he noticed and responded with a smile.

"You need help with that Hachiman?" Totsuka pointed at my homework, and I out of instinct accepted his generous offer to help.

"Yes."

"Hey…" Yukinoshita's objected voice pulled my gaze. Well, she looked like she was in a bad mood for some reason.

"What?" I asked.

"Just then, I offered you one."

"You did?"

"It's hasn't even been more than three minutes. Do you have a concussion?"

I gritted my teeth in annoyance to her rhetorical question, didn't really matter whether that was a retort or an insult.

Totsuka gave a smile and speak out his mind in consideration for our squabbling.

"Ah, but if Yukinoshita-san wanted to help then I won't mind. It's better if it's her."

"It's not that I wanted to…it's just he openly accepted another's help, in front of me, which is similar to an indirect rejection." Yukinoshita explained. _Why are you even getting so ridiculously worked up over this?_

"Look, put it this way…you already have your hands or head, full with your other two students. This is me making it easy for you." I said in replacing impoliteness with thoughtfulness.

"I appreciate your thoughtfulness…but I'm here in responsible to assist everyone, and I mean everyone, ensuring they understand and improve their studies…" Yukinoshita's resolve froze me in amazement. I was completely breath taken, I didn't know…if I did I wouldn't have…

"Oh… I see, I guess-" As I attempted to apologize, Yukinoshita quickly intervene making a response that made apologizing seemed pointless now.

"And such impoliteness cannot be tolerated. Especially from you, but I suppose that was to be expected."

 _Now you just killed the mood!_

Suddenly a giggle caught both me and Yukinoshita's attention as we looked towards the source of the quiet giggle. Totsuka giggled as he covered his mouth, holding his laughter back.

As he noticed out stares, he immediately apologized.

"Sorry. It's just…it's fun seeing you together. I mean, together as in not as couple but as friends. Yeah, that's what I meant." Totsuka let out a wryly laughed. _You really know how to pick your words, don't you…_

His word 'couple' caused an awkward silence slowly growing between us. Yukinoshita lowered her head in attempt to conceal the very visible blush on her face, while I simply scratched my head and look my eyes away in embarrassment as Totsuka continued talking.

"I don't get it. You guys are obviously close, why aren't you guys calling each other by first names?"

I flinched, so as the person next to me.

"Well…it's just…" I was getting even more fluster by the second that I couldn't continue on and just fell into silence.

"Ah, I get it. Well, if it's too embarrassing why not nick names? Like Hachi or Yuki?" Totsuka suggested, but me and Yukinoshita simultaneously gave an instant…

"No."

"Uh…wow instant answer. Umm…why not?" Totsuka tilted his head with a wondered look.

"We don't indulge ourselves in such informalities." Said Yukinoshita vigorously and composed.

I nodded in agreement.

"What about Yuigahama-san?" Totsuka returned with another question, and we answered his question in reflex, alternate turns and describing Yuigahama's characteristic.

"It wasn't a desire." Yukinoshita started off.

"She's a special case." Followed by me.

"Her behavior is in disarray."

"She's an airhead."

Our out loud description caught a _wanted_ attention as she scorn noisily at us.

"I'm over here! And I totally heard all that!" Yuigahama shot her gaze from her studies to me and Yukinoshita.

"Sorry, but are we whispering?" I asked sarcastically towards Yuigahama and Yukinoshita followed my pace, continuing on.

"Indeed we didn't, therefore it's on purpose."

"You guys are horrible!"

Around the corner of my eyes, Totsuka chuckled quietly as he trembled continued enduring himself from bursting into laughter.

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Another hour had passed in the library. Kawasaki was long gone already, she said she had to leave early to pick up her little sister from school, so did other students leaving the library as time goes by.

Zaimokuza, apparently left as well, I think. I wasn't sure at first, because and I quote ' _I shall venture myself to the depths of this horrific dungeon!'_ and he brought his schoolbag along with him, so it's safe to assume he secretly escape, not that we care. Truthfully, I didn't notice he was gone until now that I think about it. I think nobody does. Can somebody remind me why we invited him in the first place?

Totsuka went back to focusing on his own assignment on the table, Yuigahama was well…she journeyed herself and scanned through the library shelves for some reason. Obvious reason was boredom. I stared at her from the table, and she smiled happily, letting out a gasp in fascination whenever she pulled a book from a shelf. She looked like a child who entered the library for the first time, just hope she won't get lost like one.

Sometimes, I'm always interested in what's going on inside that head of hers, regarding to how it works and set her to be so…Yuigahama.

I sigh, and returned my sight to my homework, but I wasn't doing anything at all to finish it because I didn't feel like it, so yes, I did nothing but stared at it for the past hours.

"Hikigaya-kun what are you doing?" Yukinoshita startled me back to my mind where it wanders off. She gazed at me with her composed look, waiting for my response.

"I was just…analyzing." I answered, giving her a convincing look.

"I see well-"

"Don't worry. If I have any question, I'll rely on your expertise to save the day." After I replied, I returned my gaze to papers again.

Yukinoshita then giggled and I turned in reflex. She had her fingers on her lips suppressing the laughter into a giggle.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"I didn't think you, of all people to rely on things. It's actually refreshing."

"Isn't it always a general thing?"

"General?"

"Everyone is relying on someone or something, but it's kind of typical that they deny the fact they're relying when it comes to a person anyway…but truth is they're already relying. They rely on brain to think, their leg to move, their hand to hold…so most people who deny reliance are hypocrites, so there's nothing wrong with reliance when you think about it. It's actually general to rely on something."

Yukinoshita chuckled at my opinion.

"Do you ever stop thinking?"

"The day I stop thinking is the day Yuigahama becomes a scientist with no relevant qualifications. Therefore, a cynical realist like myself is necessary to peg the deluded a thing or two."

Yukinoshita averted her gaze from me, giggling behind her palm, concealing her laughter.

Her wonderful fragrance was much notice to my nose, the sweet scent of her little breath that escaped her mouth into a giggle gave a hard thud to every beat on my chest. My stare was immediately fixed on her alluring face, searching from her half-closed glimmering eyes down to her moist lips concealed by her fingers.

Yukinoshita stopped giggling as she noticed my stare, surprised at first then a gentle smile formed on her lips and she stare that smile at me, with her eyes fixed on mine. We stayed staring each other until; Yuigahama popped herself between us with a book she found.

"Look guys!" Yuigahama laid down a heavily old looking thick book on the table, there was a slight dust flew off in the air from the book, causing me to cough.

 _What's this…Chiba prefecture late 90's? Didn't know she's interested in history._

Yukinoshita regain her composure after a surprising appearance from Yuigahama as she cleared her throat and continued with her book.

Yuigahama walked behind me, and stood next to me as she opened the book. She had an ecstatic expression flipping the pages of the book. Most of the pages of this book were filled with cut and pasted crumpled newspaper articles assuming back from the 90's. _Don't tell me she picked this book because it has fewer words but more pictures? As expected from Yuigahama._

"Look, it's our school!" Yuigahama excitedly pointed her index finger on an old picture of our beloved high school, Sobu high.

"Yeah, I guess it is." I replied. _Hmm…it doesn't look much different, well except in this picture Sobu high back then has fewer buildings._

"Yuigahama-san here." Totsuka kindly offered his seat to Yuigahama while he moved himself to where Zaimokuza was seated.

"Ah, thanks Sai-chan!"

Yuigahama flipped to another page, and suddenly burst into laughing. "Look, look Hikki this guy is just like you!"

Yuigahama pointed out to a man around his 30's standing inside what looked like to be the exterior of the community center. I was annoyed of course, however, I admit the guy does have a similar resemblance…around the facial features, mostly the eyes give away, but he's bold.

"I believe he's a janitor, since he seems to be holding what look like a broom." Yukinoshita noted his appearance. _Say, aren't you supposed to be reading that book?_

Totsuka had his interest been piqued and immediately stood up, leaning closer to the book to have a close inspection of the picture on the old newspaper article.

He let out a chuckled and added, "Wow, it does look him. Except the bold head of course."

"I wouldn't be surprise if he ended up becoming a janitor. History does have a hysterical way of repeating itself." Yukinoshita added and gave a teasing smile at me.

"Shut it." I said in my annoyance.

Yuigahama intervened to discard the pitiful atmosphere collecting itself around me.

"Well, come on Hikki, at least it's better than ending up as jobless househusband."

 _Are you seriously encouraging me!? Is that supposed to make me feel better!?_

Totsuka laughed wryly upon a small revelation from Yuigahama. "Househusband?"

"Uh well, it's just a dream I used to have…" I replied slightly agitating.

Yukinoshita, her mouth agape looked at me with a slightly surprised look. "Used to?"

Totsuka noticed and couldn't help but ask. "Oh then you have plans Hachiman? Tell us!"

"Y-Yeah. I guess, I have been wrapping around the idea of pursuing myself to become a…lawyer."

Everyone on the table gasped in both amazement and surprised.

Yukinoshita who I'd expect to be the first to throw in an insult on behalf of her disbelief, surprisingly had no comment to make. Instead, she gave a small pleasant smile at my direction.

"Woah, since when have you thought about it Hikki?" Yuigahama still surprise, curiously asked.

It's not that I thought about it myself. Orimoto's the one who suggested the idea, ever since then…I've been having a thought or two in pursuing that ambition.

"Well…Orimoto's the one-" I immediately stopped, when all of the sudden the temperature around me dropped, also I noticed two certain girls had a dull look on their faces as they mysteriously went dead silent.

Totsuka felt the atmosphere and dubiously alternate his gaze between Yuigahama and Yukinoshita.

Yuigahama still with a dull gloomy look speaks out.

"Hikki…why were you hanging with Ori?"

 _Huh? Who's Ori? Ohh her…_

"It's not that we meet, we just bumped into-"

"And how did she able to easily reshape your future to the better whereas we failed to do so in the past, Hikigaya-kun?" Yukinoshita gave a somewhat cold unpleasant smile as she asked.

 _What's that supposed to mean!?_

"Tch. Whatever, let's just flip another page." As my hand turned over to another page, Yuigahama quickly gave an abrupt question about the picture on the newly turned page.

"What's with the guy with the hand-…hand-, thingy that police use to arrest bad guys?"

"Handcuffs." Yukinoshita replied, clearing up Yuigahama's confusion.

Totsuka who was scanning the picture from his seat in silent, speaks out as he notice something.

"Hmm…there's a caption below it."

"Really?" In curious, Yuigahama quickly stood from her seat, leaning closer and bend down against the table to take a closer reading.

"What are you doing? I could just rea-" I paused and quickly froze still as my eyes stumbled upon an unwanted display from the girl who was currently bending down in front of me on the table, her loosely tie and unbuttoned buttons around her collar secretly expose her… _bobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobooooooooooooooobs!_

 _No! Control yourself! You are more than you are born to be!_ I shook my head, avoiding such an indecent sight.

"Hmm…a lawyer arrested…for an attempt of bribery…"Yuigahama who hasn't noticed, was busy reading the caption on Totsuka's attention.

I returned and set my full concentration on the article, but my eyes…were unconsciously fixed on Yuigahama's bosom. _Blue…who would've thought._

At the same time, a sudden sheer heavy force slowly pressed itself against my right foot painfully. I slightly jumped as the jolt of pain made its presence aware to me. I quickly scanned my eyes, underneath the table while still enduring the pain, and found source of the force pressing against my poor foot was another foot…that belonged to the lady sitting beside me, Yukinoshita.

As I shot my gaze at her in slight anger, it was outmatched by an emanating cold glare of the ice queen. As I was agitated, she gave me a sharp shivering whisper in respond to my caught in the act.

"It seems your eyes indeed are as rotten as it appears to be." She pressed my foot again, and I quickly placed a hand on my mouth suppressing a yelp.

"Be gone." She muttered defiantly, her expression darkens.

"S-Sorry sorry sorry, it won't happen again, I swear on my whole pathetic life it won't." I impulsively spouted out shakily to her in pain, begging her to stop.

Yukinoshita nodded. "Very well. Yuigahama-san, please sit down while you're reading."

Yuigahama nodded and comply with Yukinoshita's order.

The force of her foot slowly loosens, and finally released itself from mine. I sighed deeply in relieve from the pain slowly fading from my foot, leaning myself back on my seat and relax.

"Hikki." Yuigahama drew the book towards me and pointed her finger on the written words.

 _Written by…Hebiko._

"Huh?"

"If I recall, isn't that your mother's name Hikigaya-kun?" Yukinoshita asked, closing her book this time. I began reading the contents of the article.

"I thought it sounded familiar." Yuigahama mumbled.

"Well, same name, same company so I guess it is…" I concluded yet, still perplexed. _So even during back then, my mom's still quite the woman._ Before I know it, a smile curled itself on my lips.

Totsuka wasn't displaying any outward reaction but continued listening to our chattering. Yuigahama quickly went from blank to hard thinking look.

"But…hmm, what about her last name? It's kind of weird." Yuigahama asked.

"Yuigahama-san, such policies and measures are required in the media industry to avoid certain risks."

"Risks? -I mean! I know what is a risk, what do you mean by risk?"

"For example, Hikigaya-san's line of work involves exposing people committing heinous crime and corrupted act though her story which would likely poses many high risks to her from any of her accused suspect. Simply like this, what if one of her suspect, or what if the real perpetrator found out her last name?"

"Well…let's see here…that guy would stalk her?"

"Correct. A stalker isn't a stalker without acquiring any details of their desirable person. With that detail, they could dig an even deeper detail, invading sensitive and private information. They'll make use of any acquired information in their defense or against them, as an act of revenge such as blackmail, posing indirect harm to the person's family. "

"In short, if anyone outside the company…or specifically outside her department were to found out her last name on her written article, Hikigaya-kun here will be collateral damage."

Yuigahama nodded and let out a brief cheerful laugh.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Ohhh. Hm. Your mom must really love you Hikki." She replied a smiled happily at me. I was slightly flushed and looked away from her.

"Don't they all?" I stated. Yuigahama's smile vanished as she seemed to notice something and had her eyes fixed with a worried look. I followed her gaze, and met a frown with downcast expression from Yukinoshita.

"Yukinoshita-san? Is something wrong?" Totsuka out of concern asked with a concerning look.

Yukinoshita gave a sad smile and shook her head; presumably to assure us that everything was fine with her, but clearly it wasn't. I realized, she probably mistook my words for sarcasm…but that wasn't what I intended.

I sighed.

"When I said all…that includes your mom as well." The three immediately fixed their blank gazes at me. I rubbed the back of my neck while averting their eyes.

"Mothers are a pain, because they care, and they care because they…well..." _this is harder than I thought._

"Hikki is right Yukinon. I'm sure you and your mom will get along."

"I may not know what's going on…" Unlike us, Totsuka wasn't aware of what's going with Yukinoshita didn't pry but that didn't stop him from trying to cheer her up as we were…

"But, parents have their own way of showing love towards their child. " with that third reassurance, Yukinoshita manage to smile again.

"Thank you."

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

The empty corridor of classes was filled with orange vivid sun light that begins to set in the late afternoon. I took my leave first before Yukinoshita, Yuigahama and Totsuka because I was planning on waiting on Komachi to finish her club activities…well that's really just an excuse so I can spy on her, making sure Taichi won't so much lay a skin on my sister. To be in the same club with my Komachi? That can't be a coincidence!

After passing by the teacher's lounge, an energetic voice greeted my back.

"Yoooo, Hikigaya." I turned towards the voice; it was my ex-modern Japanese teacher, who appeared to be carrying two tables one overlapping on top of it.

"Hiratsuka-sensei?"

Hiratsuka-sensei grinned at me.

"Nice timing! Help me out with this, will you."

I blew a gust of air out of my breath, and brought my schoolbag up to my shoulder, able my hands free to carry the tables.

"Fine."

I lifted the tables, and started walking to where Hiratsuka-sensei was leading me.

"Where to?"

"The storage room of course."

"So how was holiday?" she asked.

"Is that what you called it?"

"Well, I thought you prefer that over suspension since school is, well…a school and you dislike any word that has anything to do with school."

"Somehow I get the feeling you already know the answer to your question." I replied. My eyes were on Hiratsuka-sensei's back, I didn't care much about the surrounding nor where we were heading.

"I'm not exactly surprised that you didn't have a quiet suspension. It's expected, considering it's you after all."

"That's something. Considering who or what I am, generally I'm expected to be a loner, slacking where I can and when I can while minding my own business."

"But you didn't, do you? And that's what's surprised me. Wait, no it doesn't." Hiratsuka-sensei laughed with her hands on her waist as we walk.

I began wondering where she was leading me…the direction, turns and route we're heading felt awfully familiar. My focus right now, was my footing and my injured hand.

"Where are we going anyway? I could feel my arms would fall off any second." I asked. I wasn't in top physical condition to carry such a load with my hand still injured; I could feel the strain slowly resurface. I don't think Hiratsuka-sensei notice yet.

"Almost there. Geez, hang on a bit okay." While walking, Hiratsuka-sensei turned her head around and gave a glance at my injured hand. She frowned and brows furrowed together.

"You know, you could've just say no consider that hand of yours, idiot." She turned away and continued her pacing.

"Even if I did, you won't stop pestering me to…"

"How'd you get that?" she asked.

"I fell down the stairs." I replied.

"Hikigaya, if you intend to lie, at least come up with a better lie than that but whatever. We're here!" Hiratsuka-sensei without delay quickly unlocked the door and slides it open.

"Alright! Get in there!" Hiratsuka-sensei steps away, giving me entry. She gave me a push on the back which cause me to stumble a bit, heck I almost trip and fall.

 _Hey, I'm the one carrying the heavy load. At least treat me gently._

I glared briefly at her before turning around to the room.

 _What th-_

 _This is…_

"The service club room…?"

"I thought you sai-"

"As I said, the storage room." She corrected.

I seemed to only remember this room as the service club but forgotten the fact that it was originally a storage room.

"Why are you spacing out there for? Don't tell me…you miss the service club?" Hiratsuka-sensei smirks at me.

"Pfft. Yeah right. Let's get this over with." I enter and carried the table over to the corner along to the piled of tables and chairs.

The room where the service club once used to be wasn't much different. The only things missing was the table leaning against near the window where Yukinoshita made her tea for our refreshments, and also the long table that centers the club where we discuss, assess situations and accepted requests, but when there's nothing to do, we either enjoy the comforting silence engaging in our own activities or chatted with each over pointless things, fussing a big deal over it.

Hiratsuka-sensei was right about one thing, I really did miss the club. I never expected myself to grown attach to a mere room, never realize it until it was already cease.

Speaking of Hiratsuka-sensei, as I searched for her, she was opening one of the windows. She reached out her cigarette pack and pulled one out of it, lighting it and started puffing from it. As usual…the thought that she's smoking on school ground never occurred to her was somewhat admirable but surreal.

"Your mom told me what happened."

I lean my side against the window next to me and listened to her.

Hiratsuka-sensei chuckled out.

"Dragging your mom in as well, huh? That's a bit far, even for you."

"It wasn't my intention. Besides…if it weren't for her…" my hand started curling itself momentarily before it relaxes again followed by a response from Hiratsuka-sensei.

"I know. Don't beat yourself up okay? If I was there with you, I would've been cornered too. Either way I'm glad it all worked out." She let out a smoke, before continuing while staring out to the window.

"A human's wisdom is based on experience, although, you experience a lot at your age…but the wisdom of a parent is something we can't truly comprehend yet until we become one."

"Just let me know when you're planning to be one. If you're ever marry of course." I teased.

"Can it, brat!" she chided and sigh.

"So…consider the current events, is over with. What are you going to do? I know you enough that you won't just leave things like nothing happens." She narrowed her concerned looking eyes at me, and waited for my response.

"…End things with her." I answered.

She had a small smile and nodded.

"Hm. I see then."

I was bewildered due to Hiratsuka-sensei didn't show any kind of will or made no effort to protest against my decision.

"Wha-, wait hold on. You're in with it? You're not against it and-"

"Hikigaya. I didn't agree or disagree a thing. I'm not your mom nor are you a kid. The choice is yours to decide, but here's a piece of advice…from a sen-…a friend." Hiratsuka-sensei walked towards, and as she reached in front of me, she held my shoulders and smiled warmly at me.

"Stop thinking too much. Quit assessing every situation you're in. Heh, it's always been like that with you…just when you're one step forward to something, you always fall a giant step behind whenever that gear in your brain started spinning."

"So for once, just shut your head off. Tell her everything that comes to mind, be open and most importantly tell her how you truly feel."

"If you're going to end things with her…end it with no regret. Let it all out and leave nothing behind."

At first, when I wanted to end things…the only feeling I felt was hopelessness but Hiratsuka-sensei somehow turned it around, even when things were about to end, she showed there's a bright side to it. I gave myself the silence to ponder deeply.

Hiratsuka-sensei gave a warm smile and pat my shoulder, as she walked passes me.

"Stick around for a while. I got something to take care first."

And without any more to converse about, Hiratsuka-sensei left the room to me alone. I stood there in the middle of the room, spacing out with no plans or any idea what I should do in this confinement until Hiratsuka-sensei returns. I glance at the corner and walked towards the opened window.

I widen the opened window, so the refreshing breeze could enter fully. As my body was in tranquil by the spring breeze gusting through the window, my mind warped around Hiratsuka-sense's words.

I nodded to myself indicating my resolve to do just as Hiratsuka-sensei advise me to do. Even when things end, it doesn't have to be sad or hopeless, but hopefully it would open a whole new door for another chapter. After all, it's a big step to something-

"Hikigaya-kun?"

* * *

 **oOoOoOo**

* * *

Suddenly yet conveniently…an unexpected voice entered my confining silence of the room. I turned around, following the voice that reached my ears.

"Yukinoshita?"

The unbelievable encounter gave us a frozen silence, staring each other while searching for any logical possible reason we both had by encounter each other again, here of all places. I mean, what were the chances, the place, the timing. I was too stump to even think, so I asked away.

"What are you doing here?"

"I should be asking the same question." Said Yukinoshita, standing there outside of the room with her schoolbag. I pointed my finger over to the pile of tables and chairs on the corner.

"I was told to carry those tables over here by Hiratsuka-sensei."

"And I was told specifically to lock this room under Hiratsuka-sensei's order."

We pondered in silence regarding both our tasks given by Hiratsuka-sensei, noticed it was just too suspicious and planned out to be a coincidence, anyone could passed by sensei and she could probably just ask anyone to do her dirty work...unless…

"Tch. That old wench."

 _I should've realized sooner…_

"…How childish. What is she trying to accomplish anyway?" Said Yukinoshita who seemingly get the idea as well, but we certainly don't know what her intentions were for purposely taking the trouble to get me and Yukinoshita in one room.

"Don't ask me. She's always vague." Yet, even so…Hiratsuka-sensei wouldn't do anything by accident.

Yukinoshita, pressed her fingers against her temple and sigh. She stepped inside the room, compose and collect as usual.

"In any case, we should-" Yukinoshita stopped midway across me and slowly turned her head looking around the room.

"What is it?" I asked, but she was too busy looking around to even answer me, and then a small smile ran across the lips of Yukinoshita.

She stopped, and stared at me looking delighted for some reason.

"It's just…this really brings back fond memories." Yukinoshita was referring to what this room used to be, which the service club was. She Stared away to the ceiling still smiling while reminiscing our days as the service club.

"There's nothing fond about being a manual labor."

"Modest as usual I see."

I lay down my schoolbag on the nearest table next to me, and reached out my phone from my pocket trouser.

"Something wrong?" Yukinoshita notices and asked.

"I'm sending a text to Komachi." And secretly to Yuigahama as well.

"I see. Well you should go; you don't want to keep her waiting."

"I wasn't texting her to wait. I was texting her to head on without me."

Expectedly, Yukinoshita immediately looked surprise.

"Yukinoshita…There's something I want to tell you. Actually, there's lot of things in my mind that I want spill to you. Something…I need to get off my head." Nervous as I was right now, I tried to keep a cool head to continue this.

"Hikigaya-kun…I…I don't understand."Yukinoshita started fidgeting, looking confused where this was going.

"Simply…it's better that we…don't see each other again." I said bluntly.

Yukinoshita, her mouth lay opened, slack-jawed in surprise with words hung on unvoiced on her lips. She stepped back for a moment, placing her hand closely to her chest slightly clenching it, then step forward with a question out of her trembling and stuttering voice.

"See…each other again? Wh-what do you mean?" my straightforwardness made her even more confused, or perhaps she knew what I really meant but wasn't really convince or accepted it.

"It's not that hard to understand. What I meant was, it's better we don't concern ourselves with each other anymore."

"I don't under-…why?" I remained silent and made no response, gazing down to the floor while Yukinoshita was still in the middle of questioning.

"It's about me is it? I know what I did was wrong…I realize I should've told you but the reason was-" she didn't continue and just lowered her head with a looming guilt on her face, placing her other hand, overlapping her hand on top of it, both hands now clenching on her chest.

"Just answer me this, did you do it…for me, or for you?" I asked…my question itself was important; it was something I wanted to know…so I may have a bit of closure, once this was over with.

"…"

"I tried making you to hate me as much as possible so you won't concern and feel neither any kind of anguish nor any emotion when you see me and-…"

"Also, I did it so even if you hated me…even when the wall between us slowly materializes itself, pushing us further away…as long as I can see you. That alone is enough for me.

"…it was both selfless and selfish." She muttered under her breath.

"Even…even so…" her body began quaking, both hands clutching tightly on her chest."

"Despite my deception, my feelings remain unchanged!" Yukinoshita passionately announced to me out loud.

"Yukinoshita…"

"So why…why do you want to end it? Why? Do you hate me that much?" said Yukinoshita, her voice cracking barely above whisper.

"At first, I thought…because I hate you…"

"But…It wasn't that."

"…I kept asking myself…I had no doubt that I'm clearly always being used, lied to, and deceived…I didn't mind…I view it as just mere annoyances. If so, why? Why is it that when you lie to me…it hurts a lot?" _so much that my heart just couldn't stop compressing until who knows when…_

I clutched onto my hands, stopping it from trembling. I gave her a weak smile while looking away out to the window, the light of the sun alternate from vivid yellow to darkened twilight as it slowly sets, and the breeze was still present blowing through the opened window.

"It's because maybe you really are someone whom I treasured very much…that it hurts, just getting lied by…if we continued this…it's just not-…it's not-"

"Genuine?" Yukinoshita finished what I was about to say. I bit my lips, and gazed down in silence.

"Hikigaya-kun…aren't you suffering enough already? I know I was partly to blame as well…but…"

"Genuine…we've been focusing so much on trying to be the very definition of that word that…we neglected what we want, and how we feel towards each other." Her voice started cracking once more; she was barely keeping her composure and tried her best to be collected and unperturbed. Apparently, her voice exposes it all.

"So please Hikigaya-kun…it just doesn't have to be superficial nor do we have to strive further, because this is enough already...if it's wrong…I don't care, I'd rather be wrong, much less of what's right…the feelings we have are what's important…my feelings for you. That I can guarantee, is real…is enough to be genuine. So please…please…"

"I'm sorry." It was all I could muster up to say. Yukinoshita went quiet; I didn't look up to check her expression…until she chuckled for unknown reason.

"That's it?" Yukinoshita chuckled again with an unpleasant smile…it was eerie and then quickly, she changed her persona to much more suitable and sensible in this case.

"You're just going to end it? Just like that after all we've been through!? All you've put me through…and you're just going to leave me like this?" tears started rising on the edges of Yukinoshita's eyes.

"It's because of you, I've become like this! I've become so emotionally attach! So desperately! So ill-compose! You made me fall so much!" anger loudly punctured her words and her tears roll from her eyes. I tried repeatedly in attempt to speak to her but she wouldn't allow it as she continued.

"So much, that it hurts…I was better off, closing myself from any kind of attachments…" she mumbled weakly as she weeps.

"But now it's too late…you showed me too much…you changed me so much...and yet-" Yukinoshita had no urge to continue. Both hands came to cup her whole face as she poorly suppressed her sob. Her whole body was shaken, and her legs trembled, looking like she was about to drop to the floor anytime soon.

I had no way, no words, and no solution on how to handle this. I was incapable. When Yukinoshita finally opened up, withdrawing her hands back in place…her face was already a streaming waterfall, the tears kept pouring out and her lips distorted in trying to hold her sob from breaking out.

"Now…you're just going to leave me…without taking any kind of responsibility on what you've done to me!?"

"HAVE YOU NO SHAME!?" Yukinoshita shouted and passionately cried, as she quickly draw her hand up, attempting a slap…but before she was able to land it, either out of improved reflex or sheer luck…I manage to caught her by the wrist.

She struggled; trying to lay waste on my face…but quickly gave up. She was all worn out after crying and sobbing so much…it reduces her stamina and my declaration broke her will to continue.

Yukinoshita sniffed while her wrist was still on my clutches. At times like these, words won't do any good. However, action was needed. Asking permission in this situation would be just surreal so I pulled Yukinoshita by the wrist.

Pulling her towards me. Embracing her.

Yukinoshita flinched then gasp deeply unto my shoulder.

"It doesn't have to be me…" I said with her still in my arms of embracement and continued on, letting out the flow of my feelings.

"It doesn't have to be just me or Yuigahama. There are others too as well. Your sister, Haruno, and now…your parents. You won't be alone anymore…and there are other people waiting to be interact with." I could feel a few teetering tears spilled freely at the edges of my eyes, which prompt me to tighten my embrace to her.

"I know…there are people you can't trust yet, there are people who rather go with superficiality relationship…but, you can change them. Change their view. After all we've been through…"

"You and I are the living proof of that." I was wrong. Nothing ever did stay the same. My life changed, ever since the first moment I stepped in this room and met her.

Part of what Yukinoshita said earlier was true. There's wasn't any point to strive it so far that it breaks you in the process. It doesn't always have to be something that needs to be shown or follow, but it always was the authentic feeling that we express and share to begin with. It was never just a mere idea or the definition itself, but a drive that gave us the courage to change, overcoming and move forward.

 _Nothing is ever impossible. As long as you keep trying, as long as you keep moving forward, keep opening doors and talking and figuring things out…you can change yourself, and the people around you._

Even if one doesn't have the courage or the confidence to do all that just yet, simply the passive act of staying present with one another, lending and reaching your hand out, gives one the potential of overcoming their weaknesses one day.

"So please, Yukinoshita…I'm requesting you, to move on and open yourself, not to just me and Yuigahama but to certain people as well."

Silence, Yukinoshita dug into my shoulder and muttered.

"Request? To be making requests…you're so selfish." I bit my lips and casted down my gaze. The silence continued passing the empty noise. Yukinoshita slowly and gently release herself from my embrace, and gazed at me now collected and composed.

"I would accept it, but only if I make a request in return. It's only fair if I do too."

I nodded and willingly obligated to fulfill what request she will ask. However, that still does not change what comes after. Yukinoshita, walked backwards slowly and close the door behind her for further privacy between us.

She closed her eyes, recomposing herself, taking in a deep a breath. As she regains herself with a determined yet flustered look, she focus her eyes at me, making one final request before we depart.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"…kiss me."

I stunned for a moment…stalling myself for my mind to swallow the process of what she said, what I thought she said…yet…

"…Wh-What?"

"Kiss me…Hikigaya-kun." She pleaded softly staring deeply into my eyes.

I hesitated and opened up to ask.

"And if I refuse?"

"Should you refuse, then your request will be invalid…and have an opposite effect. I won't move on, I will keep chasing you, even if it irritates or pains you. I will not rest, and I will also consider taking such shameful, ill measures to make you accept me again…so, are you willing to refuse?"

I flinched and lightly bit my lips, as I didn't expect Yukinoshita to spout out such harsh and ill-founded words of desperation. Still stunned, Yukinoshita noticed my sudden silence and silently started walking towards me. I stared at her absent-minded, until my mind withdrew when she was already standing in front of me, invading my comfort zone.

My body froze as she took another step closer towards me until we were now both practically inches apart. As I tried looking away, Yukinoshita placed both her palms on my cheeks. As expected…It was soft, and despite her cold demeanor…it was also warm, just as I remembered.

"I'm sorry…" Yukinoshita whispered, and gently rubbed my left cheek with her right palm.

I averted my eyes as I answered her.

"It didn't hurt that much." Yukinoshita had a concerned look, her fingertips softly grazing upon my reddened cheek, tracing it down to my jowl. Yukinoshita gently grabbed hold of my right hand, fidgeting yet slowly guiding it to her left cheek.

Just when she laid my palm on the left side of her face, she squirmed and her cheeks quickly flared red. I had the same outward reaction as she did. She softly rubbed her cheek against my palm that was still clung onto her hands. My hand, on its own…tingles, and started feeling the softness of Yukinoshita's cheek on my palm. She stared at me, still in flushed with a pleading look.

"Don't stare at me like that…" She whispered softly, and pouts her lips.

"I couldn't help it with that look on your face…" I stuttered and flustered. Yukinoshita hid by dug her face softly onto my hand. _Since when did she become so assertive?_

Compared with her face, my hand was big enough to cover almost half of her head. How small the structures of a female weren't really a mystery to me, but to experience it first hand was very much different.

My hand slid into her hair and began stroking it down to her neck. Yukinoshita squirmed in every skin contact I've made on her.

"Hikigaya-kun…" She gasps in surprised. Her heavy breath that I faintly felt against my neck, made me realize only now that she was this close. Our eyes were locking with each other, our nose that smelled the overwhelming relaxing scent of both presences almost inches apart from skin contact, and our escaped breaths blew against each other followed by the flushing expression due to the sudden intimacy.

My mind stopped processing and assessing the situation. Everything submerged and stopped within the filling silence. The only source of sound right now, was the beating within my chest…multi-folding as time goes. I've been restraining myself so far, but I didn't expect the process before going through a kiss to be so intimate…

I've reached my limit.

I gave into my male instinct as I slipped my hand around the back of her neck while my other hand found itself around her waist causing her to slightly gasp. Yet still with a bit of restraint, I pulled her gently and slowly drew my face closer. Agitated at first but then she responded the same motion and drew her face closer as well. Both her hands clung onto my shirt pulling herself towards me, while raising herself to my height. Her eyes closed, our breathing gets heavier as our lips were drawing near to each other.

There was nothing but an overwhelming fear that surges in me. I was terrified. Not because of my inexperience in such intimacy, but it's because…if this happens, will what I decided change? Rather than end things and be far apart, will this inevitably changed my decision and helplessly draw me closer?

What happens next was an unforgettable exchange. A feeling of both lightness and softness yet powerful, and consuming…intensity unlike anything I've experience or felt with anyone, because this was the first, and I didn't expect it to engulf me so much…that it…undo me.

Undo everything and raise a restless suspicion in return.

Did Yukinoshita know this? Did she plan this out, knowing it would?

I thought, after we initiate this, I thought that was it…

But I was wrong.

As expected.

* * *

 **FIN**

* * *

 **That's it I guess, well not really. I decided to make a spinoff of what happens after just in case some of you are unsatisfied with the ending. Not just because of that but I do enjoy making fanfics especially if it's Oregairu fanfic.**

 **Buuuuut, no promises though. Right now I'm getting pretty busy so yeah. Here's a bit of monologue to give some of my readers a heads up for what's coming on the spin off or should call it, "After story."**

* * *

" **Five months since then, now entering September."**

" **Close friends, close acquaintances…been acting very dodgy. They should at least act normal, otherwise the unexpected became expected, so I knew what was going on."**

" **The corporate mother behind her specs. The big shot father behind his suit and tie. Old mistake, present regret slowly turning into a hidden grudge that burst into anger."**

" **The one and only snow of every season…now far from my reaches. Even further when I saw, I thought I saw…but shouldn't I be happy for her? So why not?"**

* * *

 **Thank you!**


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